


Betwixt the pages

by Zedta



Series: Betwixt... and all that come after [1]
Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: A few minor F/M couples, Also some family bonding thingy, Disguised fluff actually, F/F, M/M, Neither light nor dark, Political intrigues that work like cat-and-mouse, Revelations, Super reasonable people, Very idyllic read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-22
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-03-22 09:59:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 93,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13761711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zedta/pseuds/Zedta
Summary: ‘As war began, two rival families prepared for peace.’Not talking was never an option; so they talked of discords and agreements, doubts and promises, worries and reassurances, and how to dance with politics yet stay alive at the same time.And happiness. And happiness.These are glimpses into the days between battles, when they can be dreamers.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted something with no drama. 'Idyllic read' is an honest tag.

Xander stepped on the last stair, feeling relieved as he looked down the narrow corridor. The buildings in the fort were well furnished but not grand in size, exactly as he needed. Too much space would mean too much that he has to keep an eye on. Here, they had a common space on the first floor, his sisters and their retainers were on the second, and himself and Leo stayed with their people on the floor above – very straightforward and simple. There was always something comforting about having everything within arm reach.

At the knock, Camilla opened her door. “Welcome, brother.”

“Camilla.” Xander stepped in.

“You look positively revived.”

“Don’t you know,” he said with a pained smile. He and Leo had rushed on the road day and night to reach the Bottomless Canyon in time, then immediately engaged in two consecutive battles. Combine that with the upheavals of ally-turned-enemy and vice versa, Xander felt a bit fried on several levels at once. He was eternally thankful for the luxurious bath of this place. Now, if he could do this talk with his siblings, maybe he would be able to catch some sleep.

They sat down on the sofa. “How do you do?” Xander asked.

“Just the same me, as always,” Camilla replied. “Our poor Corrin, though. She is so upset about that Chevois general. It’s truly a waste, I guess; I have only known that girl very briefly, but she seemed to be a promising character.”

“Lady Scarlet, was that her? The famous Chevois knight?”

“Yes, the one you thought so hard about. Too bad, now that she is gone, it will be even more difficult for you to deal with Cheve.”

Xander closed his eyes and sighed. “True. Even if I personally think they should gain more independence, from the Nohrian vantage, we can’t let them get it through a rebel, especially now.”

Camilla patted his back. “You will find a way. Who knows, maybe if our alliance with the Hoshidan continue, it will help later on.”

“Hmn. I saw Prince Ryoma earlier. He seemed to be strongly affected by the lady’s death too.” Compared to any other person, the high prince still looked like a solid block of composure. Xander thought that he had seen the hint of a crack, however, a heavier shadow on the man’s countenance.

“Those Hoshidan may act a bit self-righteous, but when they do feel something they are quite sincere,” Camilla said.

“You trust them then?”

“I trust Corrin on certain aspects,” she shrugged. “About them…My personal affection aside, I just have enough of a hunch.”

Xander frowned. “…Listen, Camilla, I apologise for that battle-”

“No no, I can’t have you do this,” Camilla cut in.

“Camilla.” Xander held her hands.

“I know you, brother dear, I know how those cogs in your mind work. You would face me then and you would come with us eventually, I believed both things were bound to happen.”

“Still, sister.”

“Okay, then apology accepted. Now forget about it.”

Xander huffed and shook his head. “You are too kind,” he said as Camilla linked her arm around his.

It was then that the door which they had left ajar creaked a bit. Leo poked his head in. His eyes were starting to show bloodshoots. “You wanted me, brother?”

“Come in and take a seat, Leo.”

Leo looked at the two of them sitting close to one side of the sofa, then turned to the armchair nearby.

Camilla’s hand shot out to drag him back.

“All right all right,” he sniffed and squeezed into the remaining space. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “Can I help you with something?”

“There’s no need to be tense. I just want to make sure that we are on the same page and that you can unload your mind a little bit. I know you have been thinking a lot since we left home.”

“I’m sure I can’t be better at multitasking on horseback than you are,” Leo scoffed, but nodded anyway.

Xander took a deep breath. “First thing first. Camila,” he said in a grave tone, “I would like us to understand clearly that we are acting against the throne.”

Camilla’s face fell. “Father dear…”

After a while, she muttered: “I suppose I already knew it inside, but to hear it from you…”

“What Leo and I have witnessed was very disturbing.” Xander briefly closed his eyes. Among them, he was always the person with the voice of order. To speak of father like this when he himself was still feeling tumultuous made his heart ache. He swallowed hard, preparing for the treacherous words, “I believe in loyalty to father and to Nohr, but at the moment, they are not the same.”

Silence hung heavily until Camilla finally shook her head. “I remember when he used to treat me better than my mother did.”

Xander’s hand knocked with Leo’s as both tried to pat her hair. Xander retracted his. “Whether it is because he is possessed or not, we have to consider what we must do for our kingdom. Hans and Iago’s forces have been obliterated, father is without his right-hand men. This should give us some time and options.”

“Technically, no one outside knows that brother and I have changed stance,” Leo said, “And Iago had not declared anything about Elise’s and your choices to the court. We can make up something.”

“Stall the news, pass father’s eyes, arrange some changes?” Camilla lifted an eyebrow.

“Essentially. I’m sad to say this, but as long as we appear to be doing something to _anyone_ , that… _thing_ will probably be pleased,” Xander said. “As for the rest of the court, I don’t think there is anyone very dangerous for now. It should be possible for us to control the situation.” The false king was a tyrant, and cunning tyrants didn’t distribute power.

“We needed to make sure of Hans and Iago’s movements, that’s why we were unable to arrive earlier than they did.” Leo tilted his head toward Xander, “Before we left, brother has given a blanket order to cease all military aggressions.”

Camilla whipped around to look at Xander. He nodded, “I had an idea of what would happen here. And yes, I went beyond my authority. At the time we arrived at the Canyon, I have yet to hear any problem with the order, but there’s no telling when whatever is possessing the throne will learn of it.”

“Time is tight then,” Camilla said, “Tomorrow, let’s talk to Corrin and Azura about ways of contacting Nohr from here, and then we will discuss.”

They gave a collective sigh. Xander looked to Leo. “Shall you and I go wish Elise a good night? There was light under her door when I came.”

“Sure?” Leo said, a bit surprised. The two of them hadn’t tucked Elise to bed together in a long time. But then, the occasion was special.

Xander smiled wryly and turned toward the entrance. “What do you think, Sunshine Princess?” he called out.

Elise immediately appeared at the door way and ran in to climb on their laps. She was in night dress. Her hair had been let down in messy locks. “I can always sense it when one of you walk by my room,” she whispered, hugging each of them. Silence resumed as the elder siblings failed to find the right word, bitterness stinging on their tongues. Elise coiled herself up into a ball. “I only need us to be together,” she said. “And you did think of coming to see me before sleep, so I will pretend that I didn’t hear a part of your talk from outside.”

Camilla sighed and rubbed her back.

*

Elise eventually let Xander carry her back to bed. He should have gone to sleep then, but he felt too restless. _Is this place strange, or am I experiencing a bizarre mental state due to the situation?_ He thought while walking out of the building, turning his head up to look at the blackness stretching out above. There was no trace of cloud in sight, and the sky embraced him in its familiar darkness. There was a power vacuum in Nohr, a deranged king on the throne, royals missing in action, soon to be followed by confusion among the ranks… He wondered how the rest of the court would hold up. The absence of Iago and his men would be a positive thing, but it might not be long before the few good courtiers they had left were swallowed up.

He almost jumped as something seemed to shift out of the corner of his eye.

Standing at the other side of the veranda was Prince Ryoma, arms crossed and eyes staring at him. It took Xander a moment to gather his thought. _Ah, the Hoshidan royals are staying in the left wing._ On each upper floor in the building, he had seen a locked door at the left end of the corridor, next to the top stair. He hadn’t had time to inquire about this detail, now the answer had presented itself.  

Seeing that he had been noticed, Prince Ryoma said: “What do you think of the stars, Prince Xander?” His tone showed no hint of double meaning.

A part of Xander felt strange, but he took another look at the sky anyway. He hadn’t paid attention to those tiny lights prior to this. “I don’t recognize any constellation.”

“Neither can I. We are in a different world altogether,” the other prince said mildly.

Xander looked back at the Hoshidan. They were really working on this peaceful union, weren’t they? Prince Ryoma’s expression was full of calmness and power, his intense eyes directed straight ahead, burning even in the thick shadow of the night. His composure was not a mask; Xander felt that although every inch of it was careful, so many years of practice had allowed the prince to control it with ease. This was a man who had integrated confidence and poise into his own being.

It also struck him that this was the first time the two of them really looked at each other outside of a battlefield. “I hope,” Xander said after a while, “That the spirit of this truce can extend beyond this realm.” Inside, he wondered if he was being rash in divulging this so soon. “Nohrian forces should be withdrawing from Hoshido at the moment.”

Prince Ryoma lifted his chin. “Oh?”

Xander felt as if he was supposed to explain more, but before he could add anything, the other man had spoken: “The order was given before you came here?”

“Yes.”

“But we still fought Iago? King Garon-”

“It was my order.”

Prince Ryoma stared at him again, eyes full of questions. As Xander remained stoic, he nodded slightly, “I guess I oughtn’t ask. I’m pleased to hear that, Prince Xander, even if your order may only be temporary.”

“I did the same for Cheve,” Xander continued.

This time, Prince Ryoma’s brows knitted together. He gave Xander an odd look.

“We are allies now, and I consider it very important that everyone from Hoshido learn of this matter as soon as possible,” Xander said, “But I would appreciate it if you refrain from discussing the details too deeply in public.”

The other prince nodded. “I understand.” He turned toward the door, “This sounds like a risky but welcome turn. I look forward to seeing the fruits cultivated by your experienced hands.”

Xander was a little surprised by the implication. “I’m younger than you though?” He blurted out.

Prince Ryoma looked back at him. “Good for you,” he said at length, then, “And good night, Prince.”

Xander looked at the retreating form and chalked the awkward exchange as one victory for diplomacy. Their values may not match for now, but at least the man must be reasonable if he could take the news in so quickly.

\----------

\----------

Valla seemed to have no winter. Dawn opened early, cool and full of leisure. Stars lingered on the purple canvas of the sky even when birdsong had already filled the forest. Ryoma looked at the pale glow of the sun. It was just past seven, yet already he was feeling a little weary. This was not usual of him, especially at the beginning of a campaign.

The two armies were far from working together. Both of their troops were small - being personal forces of the royalties, and although all were loyal and elites, there was still a long road ahead before they could fight as one. Combine that with the fact that they had a completely new commander, the first deploy would not be ready for some time yet. The day after their arrival at Valla, Corrin had given a speech, followed by himself and Prince Xander. From what he sensed, caution was still abound, as it should be.

_At least they trusted us enough to jump into the chasm._

Where could the army go from here? His best way of leading was by instinct, and that may not serve in the coming days. What awaited seemed to be something mythical, which was an area he was not experienced in. Meanwhile, this campaign needed to be finished as soon as possible.

He wished Scarlet was here. The warrior part in him had forced itself to make peace with her absence, but the rest of him was lagging behind. He caught himself wondering what she would have said today, how she would have felt after a night of rest. To lose someone close so suddenly brought him a strangely familiar feeling, and after all these years, he still didn’t know how to make of it. For every bit of pain in him, there were three bits of the desire to fight, to focus on the future, to continue carrying everything forward to victory. He wondered if it was a sign of avoidance. The day before, he had felt trapped by the tortured look on Sakura’s face as she was torn between consoling him and leaving him alone. Corrin, in her tenacious way, had also tried to the stay with him for as long as she could keep her exhaustion at bay.  He didn’t have the heart to tell his siblings that that he didn’t know how to grief in the way they imagined. When Hinoka came back from outside and pry Corrin away, he had felt such relief that guilt sparked.

Scarlet. Scarlet. She had come with them out of personal will, not for Cheve, only for her chivalrous way, but even then, Ryoma felt the weight of responsibility. In a similar way, each of the soldiers in this fort had only come for someone in this building.

Voices rose from below the balcony.

He craned his head to look down and saw Takumi and Hinoka speaking with Prince Leo at the patio table. They were not exactly in argument, but there was definitely tension. Both his brother and the prince were leaning forward on the table. Ever since their forces first fought beside each other, it seemed that Takumi and Prince Leo had been unable to leave each other alone and not exactly in a friendly way. Their interactions were always a mix of courteous restraint and hot-headed snipes. _They are smart, but they are also teenagers,_ Ryoma thought.

“I’m not so blind as to say that all Nohrians are untrustworthy or cruel. For Corrin, I can even fight along your side on the battlefield,” Takumi said, though he didn’t look convinced himself. “What I am talking about is that your culture allows too many cruelties to happen, and I doubt that it will change any time soon. If bad things occur and people pass them off as mere misfortunes or blame the victims for it, how do you expect society to improve? I don’t believe one thing about the two countries coming together.”

“I am well aware of that. But why do you speak as if there has never been peace between Hoshido and Nohr? I would rather say the opposite of your words: Even if you and I cannot work well together in battle, we should still strive for a connection between our countries. Corrin is obviously trying for it, even if she has nothing but her strong will, while we are the people with tools in our hands.”

“Because if so many years of apparent peace could be erased so quickly, it just proves that you Nohrians are incorrigible,” Hinoka said, seeming more like she was explaining Takumi’s view than telling her own.

Ryoma knew this was a widespread sentiment among Hoshidans. The night before, he had informed his troops of Nohr’s recent moves. Most of them had expressed relief, but underneath it, Ryoma sensed that they were mostly puzzled. He himself shared the feeling. Until he held proofs of Prince Xander’s words in his hand, he couldn’t put much trust into anything.

“You have heard from Azura yourself that my father has been under heavy, if not complete influence by Anankos.”

“Very well, supposed that this war was Anankos’ doing and eventually we can bring your father back, how much can his policies improve?” Takumi cut back in. “There is a history of Nohr being barbaric, mind you. What will you do about the rest of your people, who have come to expect an aggressive monarch?”

“That’s exactly why people like you and I must have the spirit of change,” Prince Leo said impatiently. “Our positions carry that duty.”

“I’m afraid I must wait until Nohr lead by example, through actual actions.”

It was a poor challenge, a thinly veiled refusal. There wasn’t much meaning in the words, but Takumi’s undertone was dangerously close to making a personal offense. Prince Leo stilled for a moment then breathed out. “It seems to me that it is not your real problem. You are just trying to push this argument into a dead-end so that you don’t have to talk about it anymore,” he said.

“Because I don’t believe your points!” Takumi said with finality.

Fearing that an eruption might be near, Ryoma quickly went downstairs and caught Princess Camilla emerging from the other entrance. From the look on her face, she was also following the exchange. Their arrival slightly reduced the heat.

Prince Leo was staring at Takumi from across the table. When he spoke again, his voice was so low he was almost whispering, “Prince Takumi, if a Nohrian suffer from ill fate, will the best that they deserve be a sneer? ‘Too bad you were born in Nohr’? For so many Nohrians who have risked their lives crossing the Bottomless Canyon in all these years of conflict, running to Hoshido because they could no longer sustain their lives in their homeland, is that something Hoshidans should tell them?”

Takumi looked struck, though he tried to hide it by biting his lips.

Princess Camilla gently shifted closer to her brother.

“Those are my selfish feelings when I think about this matter. If it paints me as manipulative when I use them to appeal to your guilty conscience, I would still do it. I hope you consider my words and put yourself in my shoes anyway.”

“I know I can’t properly put myself in your shoes either. We are very different,” Prince Leo continued. “But we must begin somewhere. I trust that you have come here for the truths just like me. If then, we have to ask ourselves: What do we want to come afterward? We can’t just wait until something reveal itself for us to react. We have to find out what future we want for our countries and plan toward it. I, at least, can provide my side of the story for your judgment.” He rose up, eyes wide and arms slightly shaking.

As Hinoka and Takumi sat grounded on the bench, Prince Leo and Princess Camilla glanced to Ryoma. The princess gave him a tiny smile.

So Ryoma gave the word. “I would like to hear what you have to say.”

“Let’s borrow big brother’s spare map then,” Prince Leo said to his sister.

*

The common room on the first floor of the Nohrians’ wing mirrored that of the Hoshidans’. Walking in from the front door, to the left, one would pass by a table made from dark wood with matching chairs before reaching the stairs. On the more spacious side of the room, there was a low tea table surrounded by armchairs, sofa, and ottomans. All were made with the plain blue and cream fabrics that formed the curtains, tablecloths, and cushions that decorated the rest of the space. The combination had nothing notable in term of aesthetic, but everything was clean and in complete set. Finally, on the far wall opposite to the door, in the corner, there was a small writing desk paired with an empty bookshelf. When they entered, this was where Prince Xander was sitting, apparently deep in thought; a small black notebook laid closed on the desk in front of him. He turned as they approached, surprised but calm. Prince Leo walked up and spoke with him in a low voice.

Ryoma looked at Prince Xander while the two princes conversed.

 _He is careful enough to carry a spare map,_ he thought. _Does any of us have a Hoshido map that isn’t covered with markings of important military stations?_

Just like the night before, he felt a little unbalanced by Prince Xander. Outside of formal settings, the prince still projected a substantial presence, but not at all threatening. He just looked very absorbed with anything he turned his attention to. Without the overwhelming killing intent he would exude in battle, the man only seemed intense in a solemn way.

It also looked like a night of sleep did not give him much help. His hair, his crown, clothes, everything was neatly in place, but he seemed still and tired, his face lacked animation. The marks of both young and old were most apparent in his eyes, which seemed to have been born expressive yet now caged in a constant graveness. The bright sunlight that shone through the window only further accentuated the crease between his brows and the grim features. The signs were subtle, but Ryoma had a strange feeling that he had glimpsed them in a few people before. Yukimura, Scarlet, his mother, people who rarely ever let anyone catch them in their darker hours.

 _But for this one-in-a-million chance, the man would still be my enemy,_ Ryoma thought.

If he was ever carefree, what would the high prince look like?

And to think that he was younger than Ryoma too.

Ryoma had to admit that he never knew much about Prince Xander. Among the Nohrian royal children, the one he had heard about the most was Prince Leo. There were some impressions about the name Camilla and Elise, then of course, Azura. The problem was, and it was a bit shameful, that for too long, Hoshido simply knew that Nohr had a first prince who was not particularly outstanding. He was a constant, not someone to appear in the news cycle. Meanwhile, as more troubling reports about the Nohrian royal family arrived, his father’s court started to spend time discussing the rises and falls of King Garon’s consorts and small children. When the name of the second or third person to the throne changed from month to month, one began to remember individuals better than their titles. Meanwhile, the actual first prince stayed in the unexciting box that Hoshido had assigned to him, name largely dismissed and progress untracked. Even when Prince Xander was named Crown Prince and a short list of his achievement was included in the report, everyone had little more to say of it than ‘ _So Nohr has a strong loyalist next in line’_ , as if he was just an extension of King Garon.

Yet this was the man who had visited the Rainbow Sage by himself, who had guided Corrin to become a kind child and a good fighter, who was trying to change the winds of war in astonishing time.

Ryoma blinked to refocus on the topic at hand. Prince Leo had spread the map of the continent on the dining table. While others had sat down, Prince Xander chose to stand behind his brother’s chair. Ryoma decided to remain standing as well.

“Some of these, I hope you have already known. I will only repeat them for the sake of discussion.” The young prince used the blunt end of a pencil to indicate two small regions on Nohrian territory. “These are the only areas suitable for cultivation in Nohr, thanks to the river system. However, the northern valley suffers from extreme winter weather for nearly six months a year. In reality, its only viable function is to serve as seasonal grassland during the summer. In this region, the livelihood of the people are large cattle, which are not easy to raise. The burden of producing foods is placed almost entirely on the other valley.”

“The southern plain of Nohr,” Prince Leo pointed, “is slightly more fortunate. The weather is milder because of the sea. Nevertheless, we regularly have problem with flood control. Our rivers do not have as much capacity as those in Hoshido. In springtime, intense snowmelt can make them overflow and damage young crops. The high peaks in the Bottomless Canyon region prevent rain clouds from crossing to Hoshido. As a result, they produce heavy rain on the Nohrian side of the mountain rnage, adding unpredictable volume of water. The region itself, as you certainly know, is also unsuitable for long term settlement due to harsh climate, even though some parts of it possesses valuable volcanic soil.”

Ryoma’s mind started to wander again as the prince continued to detail the hardships of farming in Nohr, uneasiness rose in his stomach. Of course he knew of these things. They were not classified information, he had learned them before. But until he heard about them from a Nohrian, he had never truly thought of these as real problems, had he? He had never thought of them as _Hoshidan problems._

‘Nohr strives on mining and technology,’ he was taught. ‘If they had remained an agricultural society, they would never have developed to their current level. In the beginning, the kingdom focused on building a powerful army. The cost was not small, but in exchange, certain tribes and territories came under the crown. A larger population allowed the specification of tasks, and mining started to bloom, then construction magic, then cities underground…’

Traveling between Hoshido and Nohr became better, trading improved, technologies were exchanged, famines and plagues became the past in both countries.

 _And we begin to forget that we are co-independent,_ Ryoma thought as he glanced at the troubled look on Takumi and Hinoka’s faces. _If one falter, two can collapse._

“It is undeniable that in recent years, we have had hostile moves against Hoshido. I- I don’t personally support those actions.” The young prince briefly looked at his brother. “But looking at every point in the recent decades, when the diplomatic relationship between our countries slowly deteriorated, I would argue that both sides are to blame for the loss of economic relationships, which would have served as buffers for our people when politics become rocky.”

For example, twenty-three years ago, a package of agreements was signed for Nohr to rent land in Hoshido so that Nohrians can come to Hoshido, produce wheat, and export the harvest back to Nohr. The package has many terms and restrictions, but it was necessary because Nohr _needed_ food security, while Hoshido didn’t have the labor force to produce enough grain to satisfy Nohr’s import demands. The problem was, whenever production volume lowered and price increased, there would be a wave of sentiment among a number Hoshidan farmers that these contracted farms were having too much market share and taking profits from Hoshidans, even if Hoshidan farms could not saturate the market.”

“A few Hoshidan dealers also colluded to further raise the price; meanwhile, as conditioned by the agreements, Nohrian farms are not allowed to price their product at lower than ninety-eight percent of the average Hoshidan domestic price. Adding this with the special tax imposed on those Nohrian farms, it turned out that Nohr had to spend more money to buy from Nohrian farms in Hoshido than from Hoshido farms themselves. There were years when our court did not have enough money to keep the food price in Nohrian markets low enough to prevent hunger. It was an absurd situation. We used to have famine because there wasn’t enough food anywhere. With this, the continent could produce food to feed everyone, but people could not afford it. Meanwhile, petitions to the Hoshidan courts received very slow responses, with the excuse that wheat is not a primary cereal of the Hoshidan population and thus was of less concern than other matters. The program was pretty much abandoned after a few years…”

Ryoma stood still as Prince Leo laid out strings of events that started decades ago - gemstone trades, spice trades, horse trades… His mind picked out the details and formulated its own side of the story. He could feel something red hot spreading inside his chest, vying with his self-control in a familiar way. It wanted him to accuse and protest, to point his finger and make judgment. It would be easy for him to deflect from the matter, to challenge Prince Leo for mentioning matters that could be dismissed as old and over. All he needed to do was to remind everyone of what King Garon had done.

 _No, my job is to listen. This is beyond the matter of one event._ Prince Leo was painting for him a picture of what he had failed to see. He knew that if he was to sit down and filter the information, many of Prince Leo’s opinions about Hoshido would remain valid. He fought the defensive instinct by analyzing it – _Am I flustered because of my pride or actually my shame?_ he thought. He was indeed ashamed. From his perspective, some of the points were biased, but overall the Nohrian prince still remembered the details of these events and agreements better than the three Hoshidans in this room combined. It also meant that compared to Prince Leo, he and his siblings were less ready to work for peace than going to war.

In front of him, Hinoka and Takumi had gone very quiet, their hands shook on their laps. Ryoma breathed a small sigh.

Oddly enough, on the other side of the table, Prince Leo appeared to be as anxious with this talk as they were. Approaching this topic with a diplomatic touch was obviously exhausting for him. His face had gone even paler than usual, his eyes seemed to be blinking against invisible sweats. He looked both eager and nervous, and Ryoma suddenly felt the weight of hope that the young prince was unconsciously laying on them.

Hoshido had always been the first to speak of peace _._ Yet around this table, it almost looked as if only the other side had prepared enough to cross the enormous gap between two countries. _When did they start and why?_ Ryoma thought. Ever since his mother came into power, he had begun to actively participate in ruling. On the other hand, Corrin had explained to him that in Nohr, the royal children had other levels of power above them. Considering that the authority of King Garon and Iago were oppressing enough, the level of involvement he was witnessing was surprising.

He observed the faces of the elder Nohrians. For the first time, he was not confident about the expressions he was seeing. He only knew how to read Hoshidans. In Nohrian culture, the ways they express their feelings maybe entirely different.

_What are these youngsters planning for Nohr?_

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a movement - it was Azura, hovering at the door way. She looked at him, then at Prince Xander, who had also caught her gaze.

Prince Xander briefly laid a hand on his brother’s shoulder then made his way to the door. Ryoma did the same.

“I relayed your message to Flora, she made this note for you,” Azura said and handed a small piece of paper to Prince Xander. Then she gave Ryoma a letter, “From Yukimura to you, big brother.”

Yukimura’s message was short: the Nohrian army was leaving Hoshidan and Chevois territory, though they remained at the borders. The generals were confused and asked for the next order.

The confirmation brought Ryoma great relief. He nodded to Prince Xander, then told Azura: “There are a few things I would like to write to him. I’ll have to bother you again later.” He seriously needed to ask to the man about Nohr. If Hoshido had spies all over Nohr, how could there be such a frustrating distance between their understandings and reality?

“How are you guys mingling, by the way?” Azura smiled, casting a meaningful glance at the scene indoor, which had come to include Sakura and Elise peeking down from the top of the staircase, tea cups still in hand. “Corrin is very hopeful about this living arrangement.”

Ryoma opened his mouth to speak, but halted and looked to Prince Xander first.

The other man smiled tightly and tilted his head.

“We are working hard on it,” Ryoma said with a light chuckle to himself

“Splendid. I believe in you, you are all adults after all,” Azura said cheekily.

“Hey,” Ryoma squinted, “You and Corrin should talk about mingling. Keep hiding in that tree house and you two won’t even know when we set this place on fire.”

Azura shook her head. “Please behave. By the way, the logistic meeting is in about twenty minutes. Corrin told me to come and remind everyone.”

“Will you be joining us, Azura?” Prince Xander inquired.

Azura visibly tensed up. “Uhm…”

“I think we would greatly value your insights,” Prince Xander added, and Ryoma recognized that special tone that only an eldest brother could possess. He knew with instinct which side he ought to be. “And you will bring Nohr and Hoshido closer together,” he said with slight amusement. Rhetoric had its uses.

“You two…” Azura looked between them, slowly moving backward. “Fine, fine, I will be there.”

She all but ran away.

A deep frown remained on Prince Xander’s face as his eyes followed her, and Ryoma felt a little sorry for the man. Azura was reserved around people she had not spent a lot of time with, but he knew she held great respect for her Nohrian siblings. In time, maybe she would be able to express herself more freely.

Inside the building, a discussion had unfolded at the table, but Prince Xander showed no inclination to join again. He sat down on a bench on the veranda, crossed his arms and plunged into deep thoughts. Ryoma walked in front of him and leaned on a column.

“Your brother’s reputation does him justice,” Ryoma said. In a corner of his mind, he beat himself up one more time: _just why is it that my image of you before seems to be very off?_

Prince Xander looked up and, after a moment, answered with what sounded like an agreement: “He is very hard working.”

“He seems to know a lot about governing work,” Ryoma said while noting _He is commenting about work ethic where others would think of genius._

“Hmn,” Xander replied, “Would you like your siblings to be active in your court, Prince Ryoma?”

 

“I would like them to be able to do what they want,” Ryoma gave the standard answer.

“I can tell that you don’t think it to be so simple either,” Prince Xander said. Ryoma thought he detected a flash of dry humour, even though the man’s expression didn’t change.  

“You are an astute man,” Ryoma smiled. “No, I think it would be best if they can have peace of mind, that’s all.”

“Which cannot be found by anyone but themselves,” Prince Xander added with a nod.

“Prince Xander, I would like to talk to you about the future our kingdoms at some time. Prince Leo’s presentation has been enlightening,” Ryoma said.

Upon hearing this, Prince Xander looked straight into Ryoma’s eyes for a while. Suddenly, Ryoma had the thought that this man might be the type who could talk a lot but rarely do. He tried another smile. “They say that Nohr seeks glory and Hoshido seeks peace. After the past few days, I have begun to think that you would like to make a different definition for ‘glory’.”

The response had a dash of skepticism. “And maybe peace can have a broader meaning than it does now?”

“Well said.”

“…You have an open mind, Prince Ryoma. I appreciate it,” Prince Xander replied slowly. “And I will thrive to do the same.”

\----------

\----------

Thud.

Takumi looked at the perfect mark made by his arrow.

Practice might allow him to draw the bow well without much effort, but if he was to give his mental state a score, it would be a solid five out of ten. He was distracted.

Prince Leo made him feel conflicted. His mind whirled around thoughts of _That’s not right_ and _Was that true?_ He wanted to scramble together an answer, to make something as elaborate as the prince’s speech, if not to defend Hoshido then at least to have his own peace back.

It _stung_ to be in a conversation like that with someone you considered a rival.  

(He didn’t know what they were rivalling in yet, they barely knew each other. But the most important thing in a rivalry was attitude, and the Nohrian prince certainly had plenty of that).

It’s not like he invited it onto himself either. He was just sitting there with Hinoka when the other prince approached them and started talking about Corrin and the two kingdoms. He gave his honest opinions, and suddenly things… exploded.

Takumi shook his head. Okay, he would admit that he wasn’t giving the perfect answers and was probably the immediate cause of that whole discussion, but he was sure that Prince Leo wasn’t directing his talk to him either. At some point, it became clear to him that the prince had been bottling up his thoughts and only used the occasion to pour things out.

It was actually more shocking for him to see the change in Prince Leo when he was serious. Ever since they first met, in his eyes, the mage has been as haughty as a smart brat could be, yet the person he saw that morning was persuasive enough just by showing how invested he was on the topic. Were those words to come from Prince Xander or Princess Camilla, Takumi would have had a better time understanding. Prince Leo was his peer… He had thought that Corrin was an exception, but could Nohr really nurture strong hearts like that? After all, there were even people like Princess Elise.

His thought strayed to the time when Ryoma suggested him to try governing work. He still hadn’t considered it. He and Hinoka were alike, they would be happy to just strike where Ryoma told them to. If Ryoma wanted him to govern, he wouldn’t hesitate to jump in. The problem was that Ryoma would never tell him what to pick for his life…

Thud.

“My my, what an awful shot.” A deep voice spoke up behind him.

“What!” Takumi turned.

“Awful, Lord Takumi.” The one-eyed man said. “Your arrow hit bullseye, but your expression is so sad. I can’t bear to watch you anymore, as an archer and a man.”

 _Typical Nohrian manner,_ Takumi couldn’t help the thought. “You are Prince Leo’s retainer.”

“Just one of them, but I’m glad that you only remember me. Niles is the name, milord”

Takumi couldn’t be bothered to deal with this type of interaction right now. “If you have anything worse to say, speak now so I can talk about them to your lord altogether.”

“Don’t be so touchy, Lord Takumi. I merely wanted to know you as a fellow archer.” Niles winked. “My shooting skill may not approach your level, but I do have a knack for magic bows, if you are interested.”

Takumi had noticed that himself.  He decided to give no comment, however. _It might be good for Sakura to train with him, but definitely not without supervision,_ he thought.

Shaking his head, he cleaned up and left the practice range without another word.

Behind him, the man tutted.

*

“Hi, brother,” Sakura greeted him when he entered the building. “Would… would you like to join me for tea later?”

“Of course,” Takumi smiled and held his sister’s hand as they walked up the stairs together. What he didn’t expect was that when ‘later’ came, he would find Hinoka and Azura joining them as well.

“You really didn’t come to the meeting, Takumi,” was the first thing that Hinoka said when he entered the room.

“I had something on my mind,” Takumi said sullenly. “Besides, brother would decide everything anyway.”

“Yes, still…”

“Even I was made to go, you know,” Azura said. “Xander insisted. I have no idea why he thought my presence would be of use, though I won’t complain about getting those bread rolls.”

“Can’t we talk about something nicer?” Takumi groaned. “This is Sakura’s-”

“Please don’t mind me!” his sister immediately said, her wide eyes directed at them with high expectation for gossips. The only boy in the room was instantly defeated.

“How did it go then?” he asked.

“Not all smoothly, but not badly either.” Hinoka tilted her head in consideration. “Lilith can help us with transporting supplies, so it’s not a big deal.” Seeing Takumi’s questioning look, she added: “She said that ever since we entered Valla, for some reason her power has increased multifold. She can cover a lot more now.”

“Most of the meeting was more like a tutoring section by Ryoma and Prince Xander for Corrin on managing the army,” Hinoka continued. “Merging troops is totally different from scaling up a small troop. Our forces are highly varied, there were so many details even my head was spinning by the end of it.”

Next to him, Azura’s voice was as light as a breeze. “That must have happened while I was busy with the roasted chicken.”

“No one said anything about… this morning then?” Takumi said, then cursed inside. He really had to drive himself into a corner.

Hinoka raised an eyebrow at him and chuckled, “What happened this morning?”

“Don’t give me that look! You were pretty shaken by what he said too, don’t pretend that you are all right with it.”

“Well, I have recovered. In fact, had you come to the meeting, you would feel better too. Princess Camilla spent the whole time discussing that talk with me, telling me how much they know about our perspectives. They are not ignorant, for sure.”

“Oh, I did listen to that part.” Azura murmured.

Sakura turned to her with hopeful eyes and took her hand. Azura smiled to her with the promise that she would tell Sakura everything later. Takumi suddenly felt singled out. If he wanted to ask them what Princess Camilla had said, he probably would have to take a harder blow to his pride than he already had.

“Ryoma wasn’t even bothered about this morning at all, you know. Like he had it all figured out by himself,” Hinoka said. “That’s big brother for you, I’m not surprised. I think he will talk to Prince Xander soon. In his words, he _wants to spar with Prince Xander_ , so I assume they will quickly move to conversations.”

Under the pointed gazes of his sisters, Takumi stubbornly shook his head and hid his face behind his tea bowl. “I’m not talking to that brat, we can’t deal with each other.”

“Are you sure? From what I’ve seen, at least Prince Leo had an easier time talking to you than to other people, even when he was arguing with us this morning. He barely voiced any opinion during the meeting afterward. His reticence actually reminded me of you.”

 _He can speak like a walking library and you still call him shy?_ Takumi wanted to retort, but checked himself. _No, that doesn’t mean he is confident. If anything, it just show that he can overcome his weakness._

He thought of the signs of struggle that had passed across Prince Leo’s face and the young voice that had continued despite moments of hesitation. Envy sparked inside him, then faded.

“Sometimes it’s just that awkward at the beginning. The first few times we talked with Princess Camilla was hella weird too, remember?” Hinoka patted his shoulder.

“That’s because it’s you! And she is still weird to me,” Takumi whined and shut his eyes. “Do you know that I’m still awkward around Corrin? Hell, I’m still awkward around Azura!”

“Aww,” Azura giggled and hug him, “My adorable baby brother.”

“Oh. Dear. Gods.” Takumi said as Hinoka and Sakura laughed and moved to add to the embrace.

When at last he was released from the group hug, Takumi lay down on the floor. “It’s hopeless, let me tell you beforehand.”

“Don’t make it harder than it is. You seem to think that you must ponder for the perfect solution before talking to them,” Hinoka said. When Takumi looked up to her, she added with a slight roll of the eyes: “I worried about the same thing, so I talked to brother and he quoted Yukimura on me. According to the man’s wisdom, when leaders carry their peoples’ interests to a negotiation, they must know that a few days of meetings will not be enough to reach a satisfactory agreement. If they don’t want the talk to fall through, they actually need to start talking much earlier. Informally. Far away from the big table. And absolutely not limited to themselves. In short, the kind of work that you and I have no reason to say we can’t do.”

As the room fell silent at this, Hinoka cleared her throat and shrugged. “It sounds nice, a bit too much like hindsight, but I guess there’s no harm in trying, right?”

Azura sighed. “Year after year, we are taught all these nice things about court work and war, yet I honestly still feel like everything is in a fog. I have been trying to keep up because Corrin works so hard, but…”

“I- I feel the same,” Sakura said. “Prince Leo asked me earlier if I was going to the meeting, I felt so bad to say no.”

Hinoka patted her head. “You don’t have to feel bad, Sakura.”

“No! Don’t go easy on me!” Sakura shook her head. “At least you and Azura tried to come! I should have done the same…. Maybe…” Her lips trembled for a moment, then she settled into a determined look.

With their internal struggle resolved, his sisters all looked at Takumi expectantly, and he groaned again, utterly defeated.

“Okay, we may be the Decorative Squad, but let’s make a team effort, shall we?” Hinoka declared “Next meeting, everyone will join!”

\----------

\----------

When Leo heard the gentle but solid knocks on his door, he sighed.

He spoke while letting Xander in: “Let me guess, did you want to talk about me not voicing my opinion in the meeting?”

“If you have realized that, then I won’t mention it. You will get there, brother,” Xander smiled. “I’ve told you before, when I was at your age I was not confident, and to this day I still live with anxiety inside.”

Leo fell back into bed.

His brother sat down next to him and spoke with an amused voice: “The other thing is, Camilla told me I ought to talk to you because you will be criticizing yourself over your earlier discussion with Prince Takumi and Princess Hinoka. Your sister informed me that you tend to overanalyze your own actions and won’t stop doing so until someone shove a foot into the gears.”

“Why do you start to care now?” Leo dragged his hands down his face. “You are always busy, you must have more important things to do.”

There was a moment of silence. Then his brother said softly: “Because it’s just the four of us now, Leo. If we don’t become stronger together, we will fall apart. With what I have in hand at the moment, I can’t protect all of you without knowing you better.”

Leo felt as if a something in his chest trembled. He removed a hand to look up. The resignation in Xander’s eyes made him shudder. It was true, four was their number. Corrin and Azura might have a future in Valla, maybe even in Hoshido if worse comes to worst, but the four of them only had Nohr to fight for.

“You really thought a lot on the ride here,” he muttered.

“The are many things that I have always carried in my mind but could not decide on until the critical time,” Xander sighed. “I can only hope that I’m not too late.”

Leo shook his head. He knew Xander would probably never understand how he had affected his siblings’ lives. Xander had been there since their beginnings, inspiring awe even when his attempts to shield them from harm sometimes failed. He was the brother who never stopped thinking and trying for them.

On the other hand, for too long, father’s approval had been Xander’s strongest reassurance. _What about now? He still acts as our resolute leader, but how much is this tearing at him inside?_

A part of Leo scolded himself for not becoming better faster, for being a liability in the wars that his brother had to face. The other part, however, was telling him to be the nice, soothing little brother that could put Xander’s mind at ease. Somehow these things seemed to be impossible to achieve together.

A warm hand patted his hair. “So, lay it on me. What is your first criticism for yourself?” Xander asked.

“…I don’t know if I should have said all that I did. I mean, they should learn about those things eventually, but right now…”

“They listened to you till the end, didn’t they?”

“… Yes.” _Yes, I know, I was surprised that they did._

“Then I’d say they were ready for this talk. You probably think you were too blunt, I just think you are passionate.”

Xander must have seen him frown because he felt a light tap between his brows. “Don’t consider that bad. You buy too much into the stereotype that an efficient leader is always measured in their actions. That’s not what ‘in control’ means. Keep your head cool, but let the fire in your heart burn strong, I have noticed that in every leader that I look up to.”

“At least,” Xander continued, “From my impressions of Prince Ryoma and Princess Hinoka, they are rather open and straightforward in matters they do not have much knowledge of. You have made good use of your opportunity.”

Leo kept frowning. Above him, Xander asked: “Do you think the effects would be better if this happens at a later time?”

 _If I’m to be fair…_ “Probably not. But selfishly, I wish I wasn’t the person who did this.”

“I understand that very well,” Xander chuckled, “Then, from my selfish side, I’m glad that it was you. No one else can arrange their arguments quite like you do, I certainly cannot. I don’t think you have realized, but you have a unique brand of leadership and you show it best in situations like these.”

Leo flushed a bit with pride, but remained stubborn. “But I am biased! My position itself screams it. I wasn’t trying that hard to be impartial either. There was a lot more to talk about how Nohr handled things poorly too, I just willfully excluded them.”

“There’s the scholar in you, always minding the biases.” Xander laughed again “They know, I assure you. Remember, it was a spontaneous discussion, not an official one; the standards were lower. If they are smart, they will be able to pick out the important parts and make up the whole picture themselves. If there is more to debate, I’m sure they will come back to us. You’ve shown that you welcome their opinions.”

Leo glanced up at his brother. “You are rather confident about the goodness in them. You and Prince Ryoma could converse with such ease in the meeting, even though you didn’t have that many shared topics to talk about.”

 _And even though Prince Ryoma talked way more than you did,_ Leo mentally added. It’s just that compared to before, the two of them had shown rather less caution, as if they had already started to figure out what they could expect from each other.   

“…..” Surprisingly, Xander was thoughtful about this. He said after a while: “I reckon I could sense that he is sincere because I have interacted with enough people to develop a certain instinct. Besides, he has been willing to give me considerable trust. Whether this will allow us to agree on important matters, however, is… too early to tell.” His words hung in the air, as if there was much more that he was mulling over and unable to explain.

His brother’s words brought another image into Leo’s mind – the face of a certain prince _. Gods, that kid,_ _his expressions were so honest that no one could be angry with his ignorance. The way I worded my argument was so unfair for him too._

He had to admit that he saw Xander’s point. Their relationship with the Hoshidan royals would improve if they put in the effort. They have encountered people in Nohr who were much worse – petty, cunning, pigheaded, detestable, you name it, and for all of the prejudice that Leo held against Hoshido, he didn’t think he would ever attribute any of these bad qualities to his new allies, not after they had listened to him so intently.

“After dinner, you and Camilla should come to my room,” Xander spoke again. “From Flora’s note, I think we can process faster.”

Leo nodded. When Xander’s order to the army was carried out without objection, the four of them had suspected this possibility. Apparently, the false king had been refusing audience to courtiers and documents presented to him had received no response. How this situation was allowed to happen  could be explained in parallel with Iago’s climb to power over the years. Ironically enough, the king’s allowance for Iago’s repeated breach of authority had degraded morale among officers, and when Iago’s place became vacant, they assumed it was all normal if Xander started to fill in. After all, he was the Crown Prince and had the reputation of a loyal knight.

If negligence was Anankos’s next method of pushing the continent into chaos, they might be lucky.

“Since we can’t pull the army all the way back yet, let’s figure out how far they should withdraw for now so that the maintenance cost is minimized,” Xander said.

“Hmn. And you want to do something about Cheve too, right?”

“We need to send an envoy soon,” Xander said. “Many of their people are loyal to us, while the resistance is… scattered right now.”

“Will you discuss that with Prince Ryoma?” Leo asked.

Xander sighed. “It cannot be avoided.” Frankly, it would be much easier for Nohr to deal with Cheve if they didn’t need to care about what Hoshido would think, but if they wanted the relationship between two forces to be better than a temporary truce, there needed to be a lot of goodwill.

This was also the thought that has been whirling in Leo’s mind ever since they began this journey. He was used to regard Hoshido with an unfavorable view, but their situation was forcing him to change. He didn’t know how Xander could do it so fast. To him the process was difficult and sometimes painful; his argument this morning was actually a product of stress. He had seen one brief disdain glance from the young Hoshidan prince, and suddenly he thought he should give the boy a piece of his mind. Ah, it sounded so stupid now that he recalled about it.

Leo closed his eyes. Next to him, Xander’s presence was warm and protective. The sound of insects suddenly roared up outside of the window, reminding him of how quiet it was before. This realm had a disarming peacefulness about it. “Brother, are you okay with where we are heading?” he asked in a small voice. Thinking of this question alone was enough to make him nervous. “Forget about me. Forget about what Camilla, Elise, or Corrin may want. Think of your own principles, are you okay with what the situation is forcing you to do?”

A long while later, a low voice answered him. “Maybe not yet, Leo. But somehow, it feels right.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *I… obviously made up a lot of stuffs for my own convenience… 
> 
> English is not my native language and this fic doesn’t have a beta so everything that sounds wrong or weird is totally my fault xD. 
> 
> The ratio of RyoMarx/LeoKumi/CamiNoka is about 50/30/20 
> 
> I have pretty much finished the main story but there are a few extras left to write. I would like to keep a consistent posting schedule, so I’ll update every two weeks on Friday :-D. Also, feel free to throw random comments at me here or on my tumblr! xD


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A day early because it's March 8. Happy International Women Day! xD

The pristine environment of a practice room was inherently different from an outdoor range. Controlled space, controlled light flow, controlled climate – it was sanitized and devoid of surprise, the ideal starting point for two men who wanted to progress beyond enemies through the art of fighting. At the moment, however, at least one person was regretting not taking this outside in the open air.

Xander wondered if this was how it would feel like to be in the ocean.

Without the legendary powers of Siegfried and Raijinto around to distract him, his whole body was registering Prince Ryoma’s fighting style with every inch and fiber. Compared to the sharpness and flashing strikes of Raijinto’s lightnings, Prince Ryoma’s movements contained a surprising quietness. It was present in every perfect alignment, every fluid decision. Sparring with him made Xander think of a large body of water – ever changing, yet ever resolute in its intention. Unstoppable.

An image flashed in his memory, of a time long ago, when he had gone down to the southern tip of Cheve for naval practice. The ocean had spread in front of his eyes, absolutely blinding under the high noon sun and more radiant than anything he had ever set eyes on. Swimming had never felt natural for him, but in that moment, a heat had spread throughout his body and a voice had told him how much he longed for a taste of this strange world he couldn’t enter. It was a proud and enchanting voice, so persuasive that for the first time, Xander became dimly aware of what ‘ardor’ could mean.

The same voice was echoing in him now, and this time, he was free to follow it. It was almost scary when he plunged into the heat of the fight. With each shout, each exchange of blow, exhilaration surged inside him, completely addictive. In a swift moment, he saw fire ablaze in his opponent’s eyes and knew that his own eyes were the same. Drunken with feelings, Xander nearly smiled with the next swing of his sword.

It was over too soon. They stood, regarding each other in a breathless moment.

“Did you learn to fight from your father?” Prince Ryoma asked when Xander finally moved to shake his hand.

“Only for a few years,” Xander managed. “But my style is indeed heavily influenced by his.” He hadn’t quite gotten used to the way Prince Ryoma could start a conversation so casually, even mentioning his father without showing a flick of hatred. It’s not uncomfortable though.

“Hmn. It’s very righteous. I have studied Nohrian swordsmanship before, but have never had the chance to experience it this fully. You are a superb swordsman.”

“…Thank you. You are a great fighter yourself,” Xander said, feeling a bit behind in the compliment department. He ventured, “I thought ‘righteousness’ is something more likely to be used for Hoshidan swordsmanship.”

“It’s just something that we value and seek, that’s why we mention it frequently,” Prince Ryoma said. “And also why I saw it apparent in your style. Actually, this may show that our cultures are closer than we thought.”

“I’m glad to hear you say so.” Xander sat down on a wood bench. True to his hope, Prince Ryoma took this as an invitation and followed. “I fear I must apologize,” Xander said. “I realize that you have started every friendly conversation we have had so far”

“I’m afraid I’ve started my share of the unfriendly ones too,” the Hoshidan prince chuckled.

Xander checked the water pitcher on the side table and poured two cups. Prince Ryoma looked at him strangely, then gave him a bright smile when given one. “Thank you,” he said.

It took a moment for Xander to realize the reason for this warm response. Something inside him soften. No people could surpass the Hoshidan on politeness, and Prince Ryoma was probably the very image of the ideal Hoshidan manner – toward non-enemies, at least.

“Prince Xander, I believe we needn’t be ceremonious to each other. Please be open with your thoughts. If I may presume, it will suit both of us better.”

 _The heavy cloak of power hinders talk,_ Xander was reminded. “That is what I have been thinking as well.”

“Then… there is something I have been wondering. Have you heard from the Duke of Nestra since our collision in Cyrkensia?”

Xander thought and shook his head. “I’m afraid that any communication by the Duke to Nohr might have ended up in Iago’s hands. As far as I know, there has not been any official reaction by the Nohrian court to what happened in Cyrkensia, so there is a possibility that nothing has come from the Duke to require one. When we received Nestra’s plea for help, they were adamant in their certainty that Hoshido was plotting an attack on them. Now, they act like nothing has happened, at least that’s how it appears on the outside.”

“That answers some of my questions. As you may know, I was in Cheve when this happened,” Prince Ryoma paused a little before continuing with careful words, “Nestra pleaded the Fourth Company of Knight to save Cyrkensia from Nohrian forces because… Well, because we were close to them.” He decidedly avoided mentioning the political stance of the company. “After that battle, however, they were completely silent. I even offered to meet with their ambassador as a Hoshidan prince to discuss what happened, but they never replied until recently, vaguely calling the event an ‘unwanted tragedy’ and appealed to our charity in rebuilding the city. There was no accusation, not even of Nohr.”

Xander briefly looked away. He recalled his impression of the Duke – a pale, wiry man, extremely smart and extremely isolated in his own mind. He whose passion for the arts had overtime morphed into a passion for power of the storybook kind. The Duke was the kind of ruler who talked about his grand vision at every turn possible and reminded his citizens to always be proud. Xander was aware that he had even ordered heroic books to be written with his image particularly visible in the depictions of both the wise heroes and their miraculous saviors (heroes were obliged to have troublesome times after all). Sometimes, it had bordered on a toxic kind of inferior complex, but Xander had always felt that he wasn’t in a position to judge, seeing that he was a prince of a large neighbor.

As he pondered at length, an idea sparked. The strangeness of it stunned him, but the more he thought about it, the more likely it became. All other thoughts in his mind halted in their tracks, his attention turned to one sole matter.

“Have you met the Duke much in recent years, Prince Ryoma?” He asked, his voice sounded slightly strange to his own ears.

“I have not had much direct contact with him at all. We have never officially met.”

Xander lowered his head and contemplated.

When the tumult in him finally settled, he flicked his eyes up and found Prince Ryoma peering at him intensely. The prince had not shown impatience.

“They are scared,” Xander said bitterly. “I think I can see it now.” Both countries were manipulated to accuse each other of invading Nestra, yet the failure of the ploy had yet to cause any visible consequence. That strongly suggested one thing. “I fear that the Duke might have cut a deal with what is… possessing the Nohrian throne, much like what Mokushu did. That is why King Garon have been traveling to Nestra so frequently in recent years. That dancer was a decoy.” Xander never expected that it could lead to this, nor could he imagine exactly how the process had happened, but somehow the pieces were falling into place. The Duke didn’t come to Nohr more often than he ought to, but who could say about the frequency of correspondence? And if King Garon personally enticed the Duke, the offer could have been irresistible.

“Sacrifice a part of his flesh now to be compensated later by the victor,” Xander said. “Put Nestra on the map of war, but only on the first and last lines of the history book. From his view, it didn’t matter which country they sided with, because it didn’t matter who would win. At worst, the conflict would still have us weakening each other and putting Nestra in a better position. He might not have expected Cyrkensia to be so thoroughly destroyed or that war would not break out. Foolish, foolish men, he and Kotaro alike.”

Prince Ryoma looked at him, seemingly surprised by his strong feelings.

Xander sighed. “If I was in their positions, I would never allow any possibility of Nohr and Hoshido becoming one by force.”

If the apparent balance between Nohr and Hoshido was toppled, all small territories on the continent would suffer. No matter how peaceful and benevolent the dominant ruler might be, the sheer size of power would be enough to make the winning country into a bully. Support Nohr of all sides? That meant selling your soul to the demon.

These kinds of thought always left a sour taste in Xander’s mouth. It reminded him that he was fulfilling all criteria of the classic hypocritical figure, who tried to preach against the very kind of order they have carried out, even if some of the carrying out was only in pretense.

Prince Ryoma, unaware of his cynical view, simply conceded. “Harsh words, but fair. Very well, I will look out for Nestra.”

“Please be careful,” Xander said, and received another surprised look. He explained: “I wish this wasn’t the case, but we have to rely on you in this. Remember, there might still be a spy among the troops here.” Iago and Hans were able to catch them at the canyon after all.

The other prince answered grimly: “I understand. Please rest assured, there won’t be another chance for war to start between our countries. And… if you don’t mind, I would like hear more about what you know of the Duke.”

“Of course I-”, Xander began to reply.

“Hullo!”

They turned to see Corrin poking her head in around the door.

“Aw, you are finished already?” she exclaimed.

“Did you want to spar, sister?” Prince Ryoma smiled.

“Hehe, it might do me good, but honestly I just wanted to see what you two were up to. Azura told me it might be fun, but she wouldn’t tell me what she knew about your plan.”

Their sister came into the room and flopped down on the wooden floor in front of them.

“I can’t imagine what she could be talking about,” Xander said. “Well, we are discussing Nestra right now, if you would like to hear…”

It took Corrin a moment to make the connection. She looked so crestfallen that Xander felt an instant twang of regret for having said what he had. “I’m so sorry. I don’t have any use other than fighting,” she mumbled.

As his sister covered her face with both hands, Prince Ryoma tried to soothe her. “Don’t feel guilty about it, you have enough on your plate already.” He glanced at Xander and seemed to find another reason to pile on. “Take on too much, and you won’t be able to do anything right. Just focus on the war for now.”

“I heard that you are handling court works from here?” Corrin asked.

While Prince Ryoma nodded, Xander said gravely: “I try.”

Corrin sighed. “Ever since Leo started tutoring me in the arts of war, I have been made aware of my lackings in every aspect. Compared to that, I would be a blank page in anything related to governing. I don’t know how you two can do both at the same time.”

“Governing is different from war in that you will need to rely on many more advisors, Corrin,” Prince Ryoma said. “You have lived among a small circle for a long time, it is normal to feel overwhelmed. Later, when we have more time, we can show you. You are caring and earnest, I don’t doubt that you will learn fast.”

Seeing that this didn’t seem to cheer Corrin up very much, Xander tried to talk to her in a different way. “I have a question, Corrin.” She looked up at his serious tone. “What do you plan to do after we win? And if you learn about governing now, where would you like to apply it?”

Corrin looked down for a while and took a deep breath before answering. “If… If Azura intend to rebuild Valla… I hope I can help her. Maybe stay by her side? I’m sorry, I know everything is still so vague that this sounds-”

But Xander had signaled her to stop. “Then that is something that you can choose to focus on for now.” Before she could question him, he said: “If we are lucky and victory comes, eventually all of us will have to consider this matter, and you will be one of the people who are most affected by it. No one here really knows what living in Valla is like, not even Azura. You two should learn about that if you want to build a life here. I don’t mind telling you what I do with Nohr and why, but to begin, you should consider them as mere examples. Listen with only Valla in mind, not Valla and Nohr _and_ the rest of the continent at the same time.”

He leaned forward and looked straight at her. “Pick your job, little princess. Does that sound reasonable?”

She stared back and, after a moment, said “…Yes.” The light had come back in her eyes. “I understand,” she said with more resolution.

Xander relaxed. Only then did he realize that Prince Ryoma had been looking at him intently. He smiled: “Do you still want to talk about Nestra this morning?”

“Certainly. I am very interested in your perspectives on them,” the prince answered.

“What about you?” Xander asked Corrin.

“Can I ask Azura? She may want to come.”

“But of course. I have to wash up too. Will forty minutes be okay with you?” Xander asked Prince Ryoma. He received a nod.

When Corrin had left and they stood up, Prince Ryoma told him: “What you said just now was good. I can learn from you.”

Xander shook his head. “I’m afraid it’s not exactly a nice approach. You are personable, I doubt you will ever have to resort to it.” It was a genuine compliment. Xander had to admit he felt competitive when he saw the ease with which the other prince commanded respect from his troops yet still got along with them on a personal level. Many years ago, he too had dreamt that he could become the kind of leader who were liked by everyone. Somewhere along the way, he had given it up. Charm was something to be born with, not learned.

“… Thank you for your kind words,” the other prince said with a conflicted look on his face. “But you speak as if you are not very close to other people. I can’t think you could have said the right words if you didn’t know Corrin well. I would never think of asking her that question, for example.”

Confronted with this remark, Xander found himself slightly loss. How should he explain a hunch that was tangled up among hundreds of other thoughts? He searched around in his head. “It’s just that… I started to think about Azura. Prince Ryoma, Azura is a very good lance fighter. Did she train alongside Princess Hinoka? Was she deeply interested in it?”

The other prince blinked. He thought and said: “She approached us with a wish to learn how to fight. She showed talent in lance fighting, that’s why it became her weapon of choice. To be honest, however, I don’t think she particularly enjoys fighting, not as much as many other people I’ve met, even though she was hard working.” The man sighed. “I have to say, try as we may, Azura prefers to keep her thoughts to herself. It is not easy to guess what she likes or dislikes.”

Xander nodded. “I was wondering if Azura had been thinking about coming back to Valla during her time in Hoshido.” He hesitated a little, “I don’t mean to suggest that she plotted a plan to return, but maybe she have been feeling at least partial responsibility toward the kingdom. After all, Queen Arete risked her own life to tell Azura about it. Even if Azura didn’t know whether there would be a day when she has to fight for Valla, she might still have prepared.”

 _And if, in the end, she accepts that her life should be in Valla, Corrin may choose to be here too._ Xander didn’t want to say this last thought – he didn’t know how to word it without sounding like he was accusing them of being calculative, when he knew it was the opposite. In his eyes, the tie between Azura and Corrin was very pure. He sensed that Corrin could lean on Azura emotionally, in a way that she couldn’t with any other people. Given Azura’s position, he wouldn’t be surprised if she felt the same toward Corrin.

In front of him, Prince Ryoma was looking down at the floor in deep thought. The moment felt strangely personal. This was, after all, not only a matter of the mind, but also a matter of the heart. There were many reasons that he and Xander could put in front of Corrin to sway her toward Hoshido or Nohr, could even try the same with Azura. But Valla would be the princesses’ selfish choice, the one that they yearned for.  As brother, Xander would rather push them toward it.

When the Hoshidan prince spoke again, his voice was gentle like a long sigh. “Ah, Prince Xander, you have given me much food for thought.”

The look in his eyes touched something inside Xander.

That morning, when the two princes walked back from the practice room side by side, many people noticed them. They also noticed that the princes did so in silence, and that it was not an unpleasant one.

 

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When Takumi came into the common room, his siblings were gathering around the writing desk. “Come and see Yukimura’s letter, Takumi,” his brother called.

Takumi looked at the bunch of paper. For a man who was efficient in presentation, Yukimura seemed to have a lot to say this time. The first page was short, however.

_My lord,_

_I would like to express my gladness upon hearing that you have struck a truce with the Nohrian force led by Prince Xander, and that the recent move by the Nohrian army signifies hope for the two kingdoms._

_As for the specific matters that you have inquired, I have detailed the actions our court have taken with regard to each of them in a separate document included with this letter. I wanted to reply to you as soon as possible, so I had only highlighted the important points. If you have any further question, I would be glad to answer them._

_Your faithful servant,_

 

 _So brother has asked him about the things Prince Leo said,_ Takumi thought. Sakura and Hinoka passed to him the summaries that Yukimura had written. As he looked through them, an uneasy feeling bloomed in his stomach. The narration was too perfect. It showed the things that Hoshido had tried, the obstacles, the faults that were committed by both sides and sometimes no one.

Takumi traded glances with his sisters, who seemed to share his opinion. In the end, Sakura was still the bravest. “Umn…” she said. “If we say that everyone did their best according to proper procedure, then doesn’t that mean that these trade models were doomed from the start?”

Her comment struck a chord with what Prince Leo had said. Ryoma nodded. “That’s what it looks like. Yukimura wrote this based on what he thought we would want, I don’t think he quite understood my intention behind the inquiry. I will ask him again. There is a serious problem with either our agents or our courtiers.”

“I’ve just spent the whole morning talking with Prince Xander about Nestra,” his brother continued. “He has observations that… really surprise me. Maybe discrimination has blinded us. Maybe we have become complacent. Probably both.”

Takumi sighed. He looked at the long pages, then said to Ryoma: “I… Do- Do you still have use for these? I could learn a bit of history.”

“Feel free to take them.” Ryoma looked around the desk. “If you want to share any new knowledge with the Nohrian royals, that will be well too. I, personally, am starting to appreciate them a lot.”

Papers in hand, Takumi left the room, feeling a little self-conscious under what he imagined to be everyone’s gaze. It didn’t help that he had to ask several people about Prince Leo’s whereabouts. Eventually, he was pointed to the mess hall.

As he walked, he mentally prepared himself. _I’m not doing this just to be even. I’m not doing this for the thought of losing or winning._ He breathed in deeply. _It’s okay, Takumi, people don’t always judge. It’s okay, it won’t matter if they judge anyway._ The words suppressed the bubbles in his stomach. He used to feel so ridiculous about this. Wasn’t it a failure, feeling so anxious over each new interaction? It had pained him to compare himself to the charisma that Ryoma and his mother possessed; but these days, he didn’t care anymore. He would use whatever could help him survive, even this kind of self talk.

The mess hall, he remembered, was a big victory for Corrin. It had taken her and the war council much effort to convince both troops to cook together and share food. _Didn’t Oboro say that she has duty here today?_ he thought. True to his fear, she was standing at the counter with a murderous expression, pointedly ignoring the few Nohrians that had gathered around the table right in front of her. He tried to cheer her up, although the attempt was a little half-hearted. These Nohrians had come in early on a day when the main dish was Hoshidan food, they had earned his respect.

Prince Leo, on the other hand, was sitting alone in the corner with an absent-minded look, his hand carried the soup spoon to his mouth in a mechanical way. The boy almost blended into the background, despite sporting a full set of black armor.

“That should be called awful too, don’t you think?” A voice spoke up at his side.

Takumi glanced at Niles.

“That’s his third bowl, mind you. I’m sad to say this, but my lord and you are similar in the oddest ways.”

Takumi refused to give a reply. He walked over to sit down opposite Prince Leo and knocked lightly on the wooden surface until recognition finally appeared in the pair of dark eyes. “Do you know what you are eating?” He cleared his throat and asked.

Prince Leo frowned, looked down at his bowl critically, then answered at length: “…Something good?”

If there was any heat of frustration inside Takumi, it was snuffed. “It’s called imoni.” He said with a huff.

“Okay… Thanks?”

“I hope you can tell what is in there?”

The frown reappeared. The boy stared down at the spoon he was holding. After a while, he gave up. “What do you want?” he snapped and brought the spoon to his lips.

Takumi nearly laughed out loud. “Nothing really.” He grinned. The defiant look on Prince Leo’s face gave him such a terrible urge to tease. “Mindfulness should be practiced during meal time, otherwise you risk getting stomach ulcer. I hope Nohrian medicine has that common advice, at least?”

Leo gave him a half-lidded glare. “That’s only if I don’t chew enough. This is soup.”

Heh, there’s the sharp edge, now he was fully back to earth. “What are you thinking so much about anyway?” he asked.

“Considering different arrangements for our troops.”

Takumi thought of what Hinoka had said. “That must be a lot of work. We have many types of combatant.”

That seemed to hit a tender spot. Prince Leo sighed deeply and dropped the spoon into the empty bowl.  He braced both of his fists on the table and pointedly looked at some invisible mark on the worn out surface.  

“If you have any question about Hoshidan combat style, I can help,” Takumi offered. He colored a bit under the stare he got in return. “I may not know much about governing work, but I have solid knowledge of our army.”

“So Nohr and Hoshido can work with each other now huh?” The other boy smirked, although his tired look pretty much negated the effect.

“I didn’t deny that!” Takumi had to protest. “I said we could fight together, just not…” Urg, he felt so uncomfortable about his own words the day before. “Never mind, let’s get this out. I can’t stand you, but you made a valid point yesterday.”

“You are right.” Prince Leo raised his hands in a gesture of peace before Takumi could start an argument about ‘what part was right’. “Actually, do excuse me about yesterday. I won’t change my meaning in the message, but I know how it was delivered could be, hmn, improved.”

 _What a pompous kid_ , Takumi thought. Nonetheless, he took some pleasure in receiving something that resembled an apology.

“Are you coming with the scouting group tomorrow afternoon?” the boy asked.

Takumi hadn’t thought about it. Usually, he just come whenever Ryoma or Hinoka tell him to. “I certainly can go,” he said.

“Then let’s meet after lunch. We can talk then go with the group together. I just can’t handle any more of this right now.” Prince Leo put an elbow on the table and propped his cheek on one hand.

 _Aren’t you a genius or something?_ Takumi wanted to joke, but he knew it would be a poor thing to say. He also decided to save Yukimura’s letter for later. “Well, think you can handle some light education for the time being?”

“What?”

“You should learn what is in the soup that you have just eaten, for example.”

“You can’t stand me but still want to sit here and talk about trivial stuffs?”

“Look, I’m trying to… Argg, why are you and your retainer even worse than other Nohrians?”

Prince Leo frowned. “It makes a big difference which of my retainers you are referring to. But really, if you don’t have anything serio-” he suddenly raised his head to look at something behind Takumi. “Leaveleaveleave!!”

“Huh?”

“Leave! It’s my sister! Move!!!”

“What, Princess Camilla-,” Takumi jumped up and turned.

But of course it wasn’t Princess Camilla. Prince Leo had no reason to feel alarmed at the sight of Princess Camilla like Takumi did. Instead, coming toward them was Princess Elise, who was smiling with determination. Sakura walked closely behind her, looking pleased. Sweat broke out on Takumi’s forehead as his heart raced. _Another game. I’m doomed._

“We’re doomed,” a voice echoed his thought from across the table.

Like a mouse that has been caught on the cheese board, Takumi started to move quickly and without rational thought. He came around the table in a futile attempt to put _anything_ between himself and the matching princesses. Prince Leo, who has also risen, unconsciously made space for him.

They probably looked like criminals lining up at the execution range.

“Next time, don’t sit in the corner,” Takumi whispered.

“Consider the lesson learned,” the other boy said through gritted teeth, “If I close my eyes and fall asleep on the spot, will they leave me in peace? I’ll honestly do it.”

“Brothers~~~” Princess Elise ran up and hold their hands. “Are you busy? Sakura thought of a wonderful game.”

“Elise, we are in the middle of-” “Busy, absolutely busy- ” “You should go find Azura” “There’s this letter-” He and Leo made a cacophony of excuses that fit together so poorly they had to give each other a praising glance at the end to celebrate the level of urgency they managed to convey.

All in all, it stunned the little princess for a moment. She took some time to process the information, then sighed, “Hmn, it can’t be helped.” Being the kid that she was, however, it took no time before she was smiling again. “But maybe you don’t need me here. You have already become super duper close friends, right? Riiiight?”

The word ‘friend’ gave Takumi goosebumps. “What?! No- Ouch!” he yelped as a steel heel connected with his shin. “Why did you-” He growled, but a long “Noooooo” had reeled him back.

“No no no, you can’t _not_ be friends!” Princess Elise’s voice reached a new pitch. Her heart-broken eyes were so wide Takumi didn’t think his own horrified look could compete against. He looked to his sister in desperation.

But there was resolution in Sakura’s downcast look. “I-I just don’t want you two to be tense like yesterday,” she said in a soft voice. “It would be nicer to be friends, don’t you think?”

 _My little sister planned this._ It dawned on Takumi. _We never had any chance of escaping._

Reluctantly, he and Prince Leo let themselves be seated again and listened as the princesses explained their invention. If Takumi’s happiness didn’t hinge on the content of their words, he would have appreciated how the girls were practically finishing each other’s sentences in an adorable way.

The game’s rules were relatively simple, with little nuance and all extortion. The princesses had gathered in their little bag pieces of paper with fun facts about everyone in the army (this immense feat alone boggled Takumi’s mind). “One of you read the clue and guess who that clue is referring to,” Princess Elise explained. “Then you have to use body language to describe that person to the other player. No mouthing or pointing at that person if they are present, please. If the other player’s guess matches yours, they get a point. If your original guess is correct, you get a point. We will judge, and the final loser owe us a favor, hehe.”

 _Not to the winner though?_ Takumi thought, but of course he wasn’t going to say that.

Meanwhile, Prince Leo protested: “Doesn’t that sound really hard? Shouldn’t a good game include a win-win solution?”

“That does sound hard, my ladies.” Niles sauntered up behind the princesses, pulling along a string of curious people.

“Hmnnn,” Princess Elise frowned, “Then how about we play a game with you first? We’ll change it a little bit. Sakura and I will act. We know the answer, so you only have to guess who that is. You will only owe us a favor if you get less than half of the questions. How about that?

Takumi breathed out. “It seems more manageable that way.”

“Just you wait,” Prince Leo muttered. Takumi took this chance to return a kick and smirked at the wince he got.

“Alrighty! Let’s do this!” Princess Elise happily presented the bag to Sakura to pick. She looked at the clue that Sakura gingerly showed to her, thought for a moment, then started to make the motion of licking her palm and dragging them up her face.

Takumi blinked.

Faced with two blank stares, the princess frantically repeated the motion, but no answer arrived. Behind her, Niles leaned down to peek at the clue. He smiled mischievously, then looked directly at them and made what Takumi guessed was an exaggerated sorry-looking face.

“What the…?” Prince Leo waved a finger at the sight. Meanwhile, Princess Elise had gotten so desperate that she was doing the licking on both hands. Niles’s quiet action was also getting more melodramatic, i.e. more disgusting, making it difficult for Takumi to figure out what he was hinting at. _Is that supposed to be a kicked-puppy expression?_ Something tickled in Takumi’s mind, jumping up and down to call for his attention. The name, the name-

Takumi grabbed Prince Leo’s wrist to still his distracting finger. “Silas!”

“Yay! You are so good!” The princesses cheered, despite both of them having gotten red in the face after only the first question – one because of the physical effort, the other due to anxiety. “It’s Silas. The knight with unruly hair!”

“How did you know?” Prince Leo turned to Takumi, then to Niles, “How did you?”

“I pay attention to things in _and_ out of bed, milord,” Niles said with a smirk.

“I have been marching with him for months,” Takumi tried to talk to Leo over the other man’s voice. “How come you don’t know? He is Nohrian.”

“I only knew him by name when I was young.” Prince Leo answered. “By the time I was allowed to visit Northern Fortress, he was no longer there. I only met him for the first time last week.”

This answer made Takumi look back to Niles with a raised eyebrow.

The second question proved to be a different challenge. Sakura read the clue Princess Elise had picked for her, then tried to do something like… shaking head? No, flipping hair? Flipping hair while looking cool? It was clear that she was not a natural actor either. Meanwhile, Niles had volunteered to be visual aid again. He walked around with tall posture and measured steps, which looked ridiculous when paired with the flapping movements that his arms were making to imitate bird wings and a face that was contorting under the pressure of suppressed giggles.

“That’s… not your sister.” Takumi tried to sound certain.

“Of course not,” Prince Leo growled, then patted Takumi’s hand quickly when Niles assumed the pose of something in the line of ‘handsome man admiring his own hands. “It’s that Hoshidan! The pegasus rider with red hair!”

“Subaki?” Takumi said, a little bewildered.

Sakura radiated relief toward him.

“Your retainer knows an awful lot about people he has just met,” Takumi whispered to Prince Leo while the crowd laughed at Niles. The man had arrived at the same time as his lord, yet had already known enough about people like Silas and Subaki to be very confident in this game.

“He has his talent,” Prince Leo replied.  

“That much talent?” Takumi asked when Niles stole the empty soup bowl from the table and started to mimic something like bad ballet on trampoline for the next question, which admittedly did look a lot like how Felicia went around. Takumi had to concede that there must be an art to it, because any mistake would undoubtedly put the man on the floor and rolling in pain.

Prince Leo seemed to run out of explanation, because he could only say: “At least we are not anywhere near losing yet.”

“Why do you have him as retainer instead of a normal soldier? I have heard bad reports about his language and my own experience has not proven otherwise.”

“Ah, tsk.” Prince Leo clicked his tongue. “Do excuse him. He likes to make people think he is a jerk, I can assure you, he is loyal and efficient. I would never allow him here if he truly damage troop morale.”

“I’ll try to take your word for it. He seems to enjoy riling me up, but not clearly because I’m a Hoshidan. What is it? My status?”

Prince Leo’s look toward him contained something like a compliment. “Want me to tell him off? I should anyway,” the prince said.

“No, not yet.” Takumi shook his head.

“You want a conquest?” The boy chuckled, “Keep up the work. You are the best kind of person to make him yield.”

“What kind of person?” Takumi squinted.

“Easily flustered but doesn’t quit.” Prince Leo was obviously pleased with his own answer, because he started giggling. Very annoyingly.

 _Ooooooh, you bastard,_ Takumi thought. When the next round rolled around, in which Princess Elise ran into the kitchen to grab some tomatoes (one of which she gave to Niles) and his game partner flew up in rage, he made a point of laughing extra hard upon hearing the explanation.

 

\--------

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All of the royals ended up taking part in the scouting party except for the little princesses and Princess Hinoka. It was a special trip. Ever since they first arrived in Valla, they had sent scout groups out only to find no sign of civil life within the distance of a week march from the original point. No village, no military station, just ruins and overgrown tracks that went on and on. _Yet those Vallite were there to attack us since the very first moment,_ Leo thought. It was extremely eerie. As Lilith had never been to the area before, she could not provide them any help on this front. All they could do was slowly search around.

It inevitably led Leo back into conversation with the young Hoshidan prince, which he had come to enjoy. In fact, the previous night, they have talked at length after the dinner game concluded, and pretty much continued it during the whole ride today. Leo felt that they had come to be able to handle most topics, even the difficult ones. He had guessed all along, for example, that the reason Prince Takumi came to find him at the mess hall was related to their original argument, but when the talk finally arrived, it brought neither ice nor fire. To be honest, he was quite touched by the way the prince let him discuss the content of the letters, like his judgement was worthy of respect and trust, even if he suspected that there was still a lot to do about before they could reach an understanding.

“So… does Nohr have a problem with food shortage this year?” Prince Takumi asked.

“What do you think?” Leo sighed. “Somewhat. We are managing, but it has become dire and chronic in certain places. Did your strategist tell you about the consequences of the failed farming program?”

Prince Takumi grimly shook his head. “You said that it was abandoned?”

“Only by its creators, not by those who left their homeland and bet their future on those farms.”

The prince frowned, then turned pale.

 _Honest, he really is so honest,_ Leo felt chastised. His voice softened. “The land lease is fifty years, at a very discounted rate. Part of that was thanks to your father. He worked hard for it, but he was only a king - not all of the other critical players in your court and ours did the same thing. Nowadays, those farms still exist in name, Prince Takumi, along with most of the farmers. No one in Nohr can keep track of them anymore, but the last time I tried to… gather information, it seemed that only a few people returned to Nohr; the rest has formed small communities to live in the middle of overgrown farm lands, producing just enough to feed themselves. They generally hide away from Hoshidans to avoid the effects of our conflict.”

Seeing the question on the other prince’s face, Leo gulped before continuing, “Most people who went to Hoshido volunteered to do so because it was the single hope left for them to change their lives and maybe their families’. When the plan fell through, there wasn’t much to go back to. If they stay in Hoshido, at least the climate would ensure that they can have enough to eat.”

“Can I ask… why the program didn’t have more involvement from Hoshidans?” Prince Takumi asked.

“Do you mean why we didn’t have Hoshidans as farm owners, for example?”

The boy nodded.

“Because in the culture of many Nohrian ethnic minorities, people do not work for a labor owner. They only ever work for themselves, on their own land or for their own business. The farms were structured like collectives for this reason. Now, if we bring Hoshidans in as managers instead, the level of power would not be enough for them to overcome the culture barrier and take charge.”

Leo looked at Prince Takumi’s expression and sighed. “I know what you are thinking. Such programs are always complicated. Where does Hoshidan law come in? Who manage the farmers at provincial level? Who represents their rights? So many obstacles that could only be overcome if everyone worked together. It didn’t happen, and now those people have to live there like they are invisible.” He didn’t understand why he was talking so much. Somehow the company the Hoshidan prince presented no pressure to him. Even the traces of suspicion or disbelief on the prince’s face didn’t make him feel like he ought to censor himself. Compared to their first argument among other members of both families, Leo was feeling much more comfortable, almost to the point that he feared he would let his mouth run uninhibited.  “Do you know what I find ironic? The Hoshidan in those areas must be good people too. They didn’t drive the Nohrian farmers out of Hoshido when our relationship became hostile, nor did they draw attention to those communities. As far as I know, the life of the farmers there are not in terrible, but it’s a precarious peace. Their choices for learning, healthcare and pretty much their whole future are extremely confined. They are practically in prison, all because we failed them.”

Prince Takumi was quiet for a while. When he spoke again, his tone had slightly changed. “Do… do you find yourself suited for this work?”

“… I am not sure what you mean.”

“For example, I admit that‒ that my sole focus has always been to become a strong warrior. Most of what I listen to pertain to training troops and improve security. Of course, everyone respects art and education and history, but…”

“But to be strong is still cooler?” Leo laughed.

“Well, cool-ish.” Prince Takumi slightly bit his lower lip. “I know you are a dedicated learner of war strategy. Now it is obvious that you care deeply about public policy as well. Did you pick either of them because you felt attracted to one? Like you thought you would be able to pursue them and contribute something?”

“Hmn… maybe I did, but wording it like that makes it sounds too certain, you know? Compare to in Hoshido, what kind of power do you think gets more respect in Nohr, hard or soft?” Leo smiled wryly. “The public policy thing… I guess I started because there was barely anyone who paid attention to it. Our kingdom has been stagnant for years, if one sees through the stability on the surface, one finds a lot of work to do. I simply did the work that was in front of me.” _Xander is incredible, but he is only one man,_ he mentally added.

This led to another lapse of silence. Next to him, Prince Takumi ducked his head and gently patted the mane of his mare. Leo’s eyes looked from his slightly tanned nose to the ear lobe that still seemed pink and soft, trying to decide which signs belonged to boyhood and which ones to the trained soldier. _In Nohr, one gains the appearance of a soldier when they looked more severe, like  a grey cloud has casted over their countenance,_ Leo thought, _not practically glowing under sunlight like this._ It was one thing to see that in Prince Ryoma and Princess Hinoka, who Leo found to be full of fighting spirit (and tangible killing intent when needed), and quite different when he looked at Prince Takumi, with his cautious battle style and more carefree manner. The light on his young face seemed to shine purely from some inner benignity.

“Say, do you think it would work if I start learning about those things?” The Hoshidan prince asked with a sign of… Was that embarrassment?

“What do you mean?” Leo had to ask again.

“How long have you been involving yourself with governing work, for example?”

“It’s rather hard to count.” Leo furrowed his brows. “It’s not like one day I started to set all kinds of goal and went out to rally people for it, more like one specific thing gradually led to more work… Four or five years, maybe?”

“Well, like you said the other day, I have some responsibility in my position. It just seems, er, daunting to dive in. Everyone else has so much experience, I can’t imagine how they started.”

 _Are you seriously asking for my opinion?_ Leo was completely surprised. When was the last time someone tried to use him as a point of reference? He realized that he couldn’t remember having someone about his age to compare either. Well, Corrin was just a bit older than he was, but her mind set was not exactly common. How should he advice a peer who was on the verge of stepping into governing? He didn’t want to talk about struggles and headlocks, but if one thing can mentally prepare a person for this work…

“You said yesterday that you like shogi, which sounds quite similar to chess, is that right?”

Prince Takumi blinked at the sudden turn of the conversation. “Hmn? Based on your description of chess, I think so.”

“What about _go_? Do you play it?”

“ _Go_ ? You know that game?” The boy looked taken aback. “I know the rules but I don’t really play it; it’s not as popular in Hoshido as it was in the past. How come you know about _go_ but not shogi?”

“Heh, well… I like chess, so one time when I was young, I decided to read up on logical games played in other nations. The first one about common Hoshidan games that I got my hands on taught _go_. I tried it, loved it, and then found that that game terrified me.”

“What?!”

“That’s right, I was terrified. I haven’t touched another book about Hoshidan game since then.”

“How so? It’s not that complicated.”

“No, it’s not. It’s extremely elegant. The big picture contains a lot of strategy, unlike the small battles in chess that make me think more of tactics. I tried to learn _go_ from that book, playing against myself. Soon, I found it to be a hobby that made me think very differently. It had to potential to make me obsess with it, and I was the only one I knew who was even aware that the game existed. That was when I got scared and decided to stop.” _Why am I running my mouth?_ Leo thought, telling himself to shut up. But he had to finish what he had started. “I told you this story because there is something in it that you may find similar to our situation. You seem to worry that you won’t be able to do well. I’m telling you, the problem will be that there’s no one around doing what you do or wanting what you want. If you dive into the kind of work we have been talking about, there will be a sense of isolation. You start to have different thoughts from your old self and most people around you. Some days, you will feel that the people you defend seem so faceless and distant, while the people you go up against are too cunning and persistent in their pursuit of gains. Right now, if you are determined and believe that you have people to lean on in difficult moments, then you are already more than qualified.”

As Prince Takumi stared at him, Leo had to advert his eyes and try to put on a cold mask. Inside, he could feel a blush that was heating up around his chest. _Don’t go up, don’t you dare spread up,_ he prayed. He imagined that other eyes around were staring at him too, that people were curious about what he be saying to the Hoshidan Prince and tried to judge him from it. Of course, he didn’t have the courage to look around and see if this was true.

On the other hand, a bit of him felt that it was worth it. This was the first time he had had the chance to share his personal take on supportive governance with another person. It brought him relief, even if he didn’t know whether Prince Takumi would sympathize with him or not.

After what felt like forever, the boy next to him finally said: “Should we make a deal then? You share your thoughts on these topics when I ask you, and I’ll be your _go_ partner.”

“Huh?” Leo turned to him with wide eyes. “What? Why?”

“What do you mean ‘Why’?” Prince Takumi looked at him like he was the one being absurd. “You seem experienced, so you should help me beat my fear when it comes find me, and I will help you enjoy _go_ again. Wouldn’t that be fair?”

“Well, I don’t need- I- It’s just an analogy-” _A childish one too._ Leo stammered, he couldn’t believe he was stammering. “Fine! Fine. Deal.” He finished and clamped his mouth shut.

A moment silence, then… “And you should stop trying so hard to appear all prim and proper.” Prince Takumi’s line came out in a blur.

“Excuse me?!” Leo hissed, firstly out of surprise. He was prepared to process to the outraged stage, but suddenly realized the nervous look on Prince Takumi’s face, which struck him as something that he often wore as well.

“I’m saying that you should be more relaxed,” the prince said. “I talked to Oboro, everyone knew you took people to the mess hall early for dinner yesterday to show support, you can’t deny that. We also suffered through that game together. I know you are not as haughty as you try to make people think. Don’t try to do it like Niles.”

“I… have no idea what you are babbling about,” Leo lied.

“There’s no pressure from anyone to make you appear so either.” Probably because of Leo’s reply, Prince Takumi continued with the vague words in a smaller voice. Leo leaned toward him to hear better and earned a huff of laugh. The Hoshidan prince cleared his throat and spoke at normal volume again. “It’s not easy to believe that, but it’s a fact that I always have to remind myself of. I know anxiety too, you know.”

“…Not a clue. You make no sense.” Leo made a show of rolling his eyes. Inside, though, his heart sped up. _What do you know? Where did it show? My face? My voice?_ It wasn’t a bad feeling, however.

“Insufferable tomato head,” Prince Takumi mocked him with a grin and urged the mare to go forward. Naturally, Leo refused to follow. He couldn’t let it show that he was excited, could he?

But his smile didn’t leave his lips for the rest of the afternoon.

 

*

 

What happened early that evening marred Leo’s good mood, however. After they had found a suitable campground and raised tents for the night, Camilla came to the large tent that he shared with Xander and their retainers to discuss the moves that they should take for Nohr. Not long after, however, Prince Ryoma and Prince Takumi were shown in, together with Corrin and Azura. The expression of the High Prince of Hoshido was particularly grim. Just that afternoon, he was chatting away the time with Xander like nothing from the past could come between them, yet the Hoshidan who led the way into their tent now seemed to have come only to make a point.

“I have received more information about what happened in Nestra,” the prince spoke directly to Xander.

“So your agents-”

“It comes from the patrician of Cyrkensia herself. She has fled to Castle Shirasagi.”

This led to a moment of thoughtful silence.

“Lady Varenil?” Camilla was the first one to speak. “Poor her, all of that fighting mustn’t have been easy for her.”

“I take it that you know her personally, Princess Camilla?”

“I wouldn’t say that we are close, but many people who come to Nestra have met her. I would guess that Azura knows her too. Right, dear?”

Azura nodded. “I have met her a few times, when I visited my voice coaches.”

The Hoshidan princes looked surprised. “I didn’t know you went to Nestra to learn,” Prince Takumi said. “You always that said you were meeting some singers you admire. If we knew…”

“You would have invited them to Hoshido, I know.” Azura smiled. “That’s exactly why.”

“News from Nestra don’t often mention her, if I recall,” Prince Ryoma said, his grave tone remained unchanged.

“She doesn’t appear on reports because she doesn’t really do anything,” Camilla said. “That’s how she has so much time to go around different cities, popping up in parties and art events of old friends to be introduced to new people, but it’s not that she is a socialite or tries to become one.”

By unwritten convention, the patrician of the jewel of Nestra was practically no more than a clerk to the seat of the Duke – the position was so close to the highest chair of power that it became a mere square of rug under the four gilded legs. Considering this fact, one must wonder what was more worrying in this situation: that even someone with so little actual power had to escape, or that only someone with so little power could run free from whatever was going on. _Or is she turning out to be an unexpected factor too?_ Leo thought.

“Her words confirm an idea that you have discussed with me, Prince Xander,” Prince Ryoma said. “She claimed that King Garon and the Duke of Nestra had an arrangement to spread a rumor in Cheve that Nohr has attacked Cyrkensia, then Nestra would ask for help from the Fourth Company. In exchange for this ‘help’, the dukedom would support the company in many aspects, especially finance. I know that there was indeed a promise of this nature when they contacted Scarlet.”

“One question,” Camilla said, “Did Nestra promise to let the company attack Nohr from its territory too?”

Prince Ryoma looked hard at them. “Yes,” he said after a while.

“No wonder Scarlet took most of her soldiers there,” Camilla said lightly, then delivered the next blow, “Let me guess. This was a trap to bring the Fourth Company to a foreign territory, where Xander’s force would take it down, am I right?”

“You are correct,” Prince Ryoma almost glowered.

 _So this was why the official Hoshidan force didn’t hear of any attack in Nestra,_ Leo thought.

He frowned. In this case, the Nohrian force that the court had sent to Cheve was probably just a distraction and a backup plan, because fighting the rebellion inside Cheve territory would risk offending the dukedom. Chevois knights were proud and protective of their own people, even when there was internal conflict. They would hardly tolerate the presence of any other force on their land and may even side with the Fourth Company. On the other hand, if the company left Cheve out of its own will and was crushed, there would be no reason for the rest of Cheve to take action. Furthermore…

It wasn’t long before his speculation was ascertained by Prince Ryoma’s words: “Outside, the Duke would accuse Scarlet’s force of attacking them and claim that Nohr has helped defending the Dukedom. Afterward, Nestra would become the stepping stone for Nohr to invade Hoshido instead.”

“The ploy has failed, but the Duke has not given up.” Cold anger bled into the prince’s voice. “According to Lady Varenil, the next time a message asking for help comes to Hoshido from Nestra, it will bring along a threat. Cheve soldiers did march into Cyrkensia at the same time as the destruction, and moreover, they went to Hoshido after the battle. If Hoshido doesn’t help Nestra, the Duke will still have a reason to accuse us of arranging everything and ask Nohr to attack Hoshido.”

“And I guess that Lady Varenil disagrees with this plan?” Camilla asked, seeming to ignore Prince Ryoma’s mood.

“She represents a group of leaders who disagree with it,” came the crisp answer.

“If someone like her have to secretly run to Hoshido to express their wish, I assume these leaders are not in a very comfortable position.” Camilla smiled. Leo had to look at her and wondered why her tone was so sprinkled with provocation today.

Outsiders did not know the nature of the truce between Nohr and Hoshido, which meant they must be in great anxiety about the current state of balance. In fact, Leo doubted that anyone believed that a full-scale war wasn’t inevitable. With this move, Lady Varenil’s group had shown that they were prepared to side with Hoshido against Nohr if peace dissolve, thus pushing Nestra deeper into the conflict that everyone in this talk wanted to avoid. _How very bold of them_ , he thought.

“Naturally, Hoshido doesn’t want to directly oppose Nestra,” Prince Ryoma pushed forward. “I hope that Nohr can clarify her intention to pursue peace for the continent to the Duke.”

While Xander nodded, it was Camilla who continued to speak. “At the same time, it is more important that this situation be detangled from Cheve first, don’t you think? Nestra could accuse Cheve of many things, but your involvement with the Fourth Company was hidden at the time of the Cyrkensia event, and it won’t be difficult to refute the words of the Duke,” she said. “We are afraid that the Duke might be hinging on Hoshido’s implied alliance with Cheve’s Fourth Company. After all, the arrival of the Chevois rebellious force at Castle Shirasagi was what officially inserted Cheve into the relationship between our kingdoms. Even if Cyrkensia never happened, we would still have a problem.”

As Prince Ryoma furrowed his brows, she added in a lighter voice, “All of this were before we started this truce, so please don’t think that we are accusing you of anything. We merely hope to learn what stance Hoshido intend to take on this matter in the future.”

“I believe that must depend on how Nohr intend to resolve her conflict with Cheve,” Prince Ryoma answered.

“As far as we are concerned, Nohr only has conflict with a small fraction of Cheve,” Xander said.

Leo blinked. Those were the first words from Xander in this discussion, and they poured oil on the fire that Camilla had lit. Across from them, the Hoshidan princes visibly tensed up. Azura and Corrin looked at them nervously.

“The men and women of the Chevois Fourth Company have enough intellect and compassion to represent many Chevois residents, Prince Xander.”

“Very well. Do they represent the Duke and the other three companies too?”

Prince Ryoma narrowed his eyes. “When you put it like that, it gives me the impression that Nohr does not plan to consider the wish of Cheve seriously.”

“I think you need to understand that each of our courts only has two choices in this matter. That is, to either decide the wish of Cheve for them, or to do our best to make sure that they can decide their own path without outside interference,” Xander said. “Nohr is in no position to support Cheve independence right now. Not long ago, it was widely expected that we would crush the resistant force; this expectation come from many leaders of both Nohr and Cheve. If I am to push for Cheve independence, there’s no doubt that I will have to fight two civil wars first. Keeping Nohrian force outside of the dukedom is already a statement in support of their self-determination. I would prefer that we provide the Chevois people with more information first. Let them consider their options in light of the recent changes between Hoshido and Nohr before we force them to react to our wills. Of course, Hoshido is free to choose otherwise, but in that case, Nohr will be compelled to involve ourselves deeper in the matter.” _If conflict increases, it would be Hoshido’s fault_ – these seemed to be the unspoken words.

“So you are insinuating that I should turn my back to the Fourth Company?” Prince Ryoma said sternly. “They have chosen to fight against Nohr’s invasion into Hoshido, not just the one targeting their territory. Hoshido owns them for that.”

“Then I hope that Hoshido will be able to help the company persuade their fellow Chevois of their good intentions,” Xander replied coolly. “Rumors and opinions are two things that are not containable. If it turns out that we are one step slower than Nestra, your support for the company will lead the rest of Cheve to believe that Hoshido is interfering with their internal matter. We don’t know if Nohr’s words to Cheve and Nestra will be of much help after that.”

Just a few sentences had effectively lowered the temperature in the tent to freezing point. Corrin had turned very white. Azura, who looked a little better, firmly gripped Corrin’s wrist, seemingly to stop the latter from saying anything even before she could think of doing that.

Leo noticed Prince Takumi’s eyes on him and shook his head very slightly. Xander sounded harsh, but at least he had pulled out from their current mess the most urgent diplomatic problem and put it on the table, plainly with all of the nasty bits. The Fourth Company had gotten into a very difficult position. Their force had been split up and their leader was missing in action. With the new truce in place and Nohrian force already pulled back from Chevois territory, Hoshido no longer had any reason to support the company’s course, especially if it didn’t want to risk offending the whole of Cheve. In the best-case scenario, the rebellious force would gather in Cheve again and make peace with the conservatives in their court. If this could help strengthening Cheve’s negotiating power with Nohr, then all the better for them. At this moment, however, the most critical goal for Hoshido was to extract itself from this delicate situation as gently as it could, not jumping to front line of the Cheve-Nohr problem.

But would Prince Ryoma consider this a cowardly goal?

As if the tension was not high enough, Camilla added another line: “If I may be curious, I would love to learn how the Chevois knights at Castle Shirasagi are welcoming Lady Varenil, Prince Ryoma.”

Leo almost thought that they had reached the point of no return and an explosion was imminent. But for a while, the high prince only watched Xander’s face. Finally, he stood up and simply said: “Hoshido will give an answer in time.”

The discussion ended as abruptly as it had started. Everyone rose to their feet and saw their guests to the entrance. Prince Ryoma raised the tent’s flap, letting cold wind sweep in. He stepped outside without looking back, followed closely by Prince Takumi, who did so with only a moment of hesitation. Azura was the last one to leave, throwing a glance at Xander and Camilla before ushering Corrin outside.

The flap closed, cutting them off from the sounds of the forest clambering in the gathering thunderstorm.

“…Could that be counted as productive?” Xander sighed and turned to Camilla. “Get through all of the pain first to make everything else easier, you said.”

Camilla laughed. “Oh it wasn’t pretty, but everyone did well, trust me. You have said all of the big points. We won’t have to keep any hidden thought in future discussions, doesn’t that make this the ideal outcome?”

“Did you two know about Nestra’s ploy before today?” Leo asked, slightly aghast.

“No no, we had no idea.” His sister smiled. “It’s simply that Xander and I have been talking about broaching the subject of Cheve with the royal Hoshidans, and I told your brother that a hard approach would do just fine. We decided to steer the mood of the talk a little bit that way.”

“That really was intentional?” Leo exclaimed. “You were sure that we weren’t going to push them over the edge?”

“I wasn’t worried at all. You two are getting along with the Hoshidan princes much faster than I did with Hinoka and Prince Takumi when I first joined. I stepped on their cute little toes every five minute back then. Are we bloodthirsty? Are we ready to burn villages down for sport? If Corrin could get a coin for every time Nohr was pitched against Hoshido in outrageous comparisons, our dear sister would have gained a kingdom to her name already.”

“And you are on first name basis with the princess now?” Xander asked with amusement.

“I quite believe that I should be on first name basis with the little prince too, if he would only stop being so shy.”

“What exactly did you do?”

“Well, Corrin scolded me for being unfriendly. I guess the other kids got scolded too. Anyway, I started blowing them kisses whenever I heard the phrase ‘Nohrian scum’, tohohoho.” Camilla laughed. “Eventually, we found other pleasant things to talk about. We all have a missing sibling recently returned to us, for example.”

“Only you can success at being such a wildcard, Camilla.” Leo sighed. He knew too well that she was much more well received than she admitted.

“Do be fair, my dear. Don’t forget that I do not bear the weight of position or pride in my life like Xander and you do. I have it easier. And remember,” Camilla pointed at Leo when he started to open his mouth, “That I am not implying that being aware of position and pride is something bad for you. I’m merely saying that I don’t do that. My pride is my siblings and my position is exactly where my heart chooses to be, to me those things are weightless.”

She came to pat his’ head and laid a hand on Xander’s cheek. “You two have done the hardest works around. I’m too lucky to have my brothers.”

“I’m lucky my sister doesn’t turn me around her finger as often as she could.” Xander smiled wryly. When he next spoke to Leo, the worried look was still there in his eyes. “Leo, if you feel uncomfortable, feel free to talk to Prince Takumi. I don’t want your friendship with him to be strained by things like this. Leave the heavy topics to Prince Ryoma and I.”

 _Why talk of Prince Takumi to me?_ Leo thought, but he also realized something else ‒ this was almost identical to how things went the other day, wasn’t it? After he started the whole argument that time, it was Camilla who went around explaining things to Princess Hinoka and Azura. This time, he could be the soft negotiator who made sure that no one get the wrong idea.

Inside, though, he still hoped that Prince Takumi would be able to see through the matter without needing an explanation from him, so he shook his head. “Maybe not yet. If both of you have trust in Prince Ryoma then Prince Takumi should have time to talk to his brother first. I guess I will go see Azura and Corrin.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- As you may know, in the Sinophere, serving refreshment to another shows respect/humbleness. Tea or wine or foods would be typical, but in this situation, water was my only reasonable choice :P.  
> \- I imagine Leo and Takumi to be about 17-18 so that when Leo started diving into governance, he was about 13.  
> \- I want to clarify that I know go doesn’t originate from Japan. I just wanted to choose a different kind of game from shogi that came from East Asia. Sidetrack: When I grew up, Hikaru no Go was a *very important* manga. Pretty much everyone between 10 and 25 at that time read it and loved it. I personally think it is one of the most well-written shounen/sport manga ever. To this day I still remember the climax very vividly, even though I have not touched any volume in nearly ten years. The other day, I read that go is becoming less and less popular in Japan. It made me feel a little sad.
> 
> \- In an alternate universe, a particular portion of this chapter would go like this:  
> “What kind of person?” Takumi squinted.  
> “Hot.”  
> =>and then this fic will be muuuuch shorter… Ahaha, how one wishes…
> 
> \- I made a chart about the political argument at the end here: [Link](http://zzzedta.tumblr.com/post/171646933173/betwixt-the-pages-chapter-2-chart)


	3. Chapter 3

Within half an hour, the sky above the camp ground had completely darkened. The air became stuffy, like in a tight balloon. With each loud thunder, tiny little corks seemed to be released, leaking gushes of cold wind into the clearing. Inside the tent, Saizo lit up two lamps, then returned to his place. Kagero prepared cold rations for everyone, meanwhile casting questioning glances at the two masters, who were sitting solemnly.

Ryoma tried to steer his mind to these small details, to dissipate the mist of frustration that was threatening to solidify into a frozen coil inside him. Takumi was sitting next to him, with his emotions completely folded inside like royalties were taught to do, and Ryoma felt a sting of disappointment. There was no shaking fist, no blanched face like his brother had shown to Prince Leo the other day, not even a blink that was faster than it should be, all because he had been conditioned to be a perfect subordinate in the present of his leader. Ryoma missed the day when he could break free from the lure of anger by searching for a trace of concern on his siblings’ faces. Now, tension had wrapped around him to make an armor and an isolating cell. Deep inside the throbbing jumble of thoughts in his head, there was a distant call for him to tear the wall down, but the tangy taste of domination was bewitching. Intimidation was a poison of power, useful and, some said, compulsory to all leaders. However, it was also in the habit of taking its own user as the first kill.

The time had come for him to take the humble pill. “Saizo. Kagero,” he called. “Think hard about this and answer me. Did you resent me for not contacting Hoshido after we parted, for being reckless in coming to Cheve? Did you feel betrayed? You have my permission to speak freely.”

Surprised, Saizo only looked up for a brief moment then returned to stare at the ground, form stiff and fists tight. Kagero glanced at her fellow ninja before looking at her lord. After a while, she said in a controlled voice: “I have known you since childhood, my lord. There is more than the sense of duty in my loyalty, and I can’t imagine holding the feelings you speak of toward you. But, to be honest, when you ask me if I have ever felt them, I can’t help thinking that maybe I should.”

Ryoma sighed, feeling the heat draining away and leaving him deflated. “Thank you.” He nodded, and Kagero and Saizo retreated to join Takumi’s retainers at the other side of the dividing screen.

After an interval of loaded silence, Ryoma asked, “Won’t you tell me what you think, Takumi?”

Takumi’s words were carefully formed. “Why did you ask them that question, big brother?”

“Because Scarlet’s soldiers must be feeling the same as them, if not worse,” Ryoma said. “It was a fatal mistake, how Scarlet and I left them behind with so little preparation for unfortunate scenarios. They may trust Scarlet unconditionally, but no matter how you make it, she had left her troops all by themselves and now disappeared in an unexplainable manner.” He and Scarlet had been too brash and too similar in mind. He had let himself be swept away by her fervor and determination, by her freedom and fearlessness – everything that he had always looked up to but distanced himself from, knowing that being a hero was different from being a king. He admired Scarlet to the point of wanting to follow her lead into every risky situation, which he did for the majority of the time they spent together. He had indulged himself, Ryoma realized bitterly.

Now, what seemed like a small misstep had come back to haunt him, threatening to damage Scarlet’s honor in the eyes of her own soldiers and all of Cheve. He hadn’t even been able to find the right words to inform her knights of her passing. If he wasn’t careful, there might be damage to Hoshido’s reputation too.

“Princess Camilla and Prince Xander have reminded me of very important things today. We have in our hands too many weapons for war and few tools for peace.” Ryoma patted his brother’s shoulder. “It seems that if we act in favor of one ally, we would betray another. This is a delicate matter.”

“So what will you choose?” Takumi gulped.

“What choice do we have other than accepting that they are right? We won’t create more problem for Nohr. We won’t tell the Fourth Company to their face that they need a new direction either. Cheve’s problem should be handled by Chevois people in their own territory. Reducing the physical scale of this conflict will be the first step forward. I do have to say, though, I need to change how I view this arrangement between Hoshido and Nohr. Because of my position, Hoshido has much more power to act than Nohr. As much as I want them to take their fair share of responsibility, Hoshido may need to do most of the legwork. The Nohrian royal siblings can give us advices and make supportive moves in a joint plan with us, but Prince Xander’s utmost concern right now should be about controlling Nohr. It is also in our interest that he be able to do so.”

“I thought you were angry at them because of what they said,” Takumi said, slightly derailing from the topic at hand.

“It is frustrating to be forced to take a lesson like that,” Ryoma sighed. “I was angry at the situation, not them, although their continuing to point out that I was between a rock and a hard place did not help. It is definitely a big hit to my pride and can turn poisonous if I allow it to be.”

“Were they testing us? I didn’t think they had to be so aggravating.”

Ryoma frowned a bit, then huffed out a laugh. “Maybe yes and no? To be fair, I was the one who started it because I set the tone of the meeting to be so cold, demanding them to take charge of everything about Nohr and such. Afterward, I think they just took the opportunity to mention all of the ugly things that we shouldn’t forget. I’ll admit, if they didn’t do that, my stubborn self would probably continue to hang on to the idea of forcing Cheve’s independence my way.” He smiled. “Did you understand Princess Camilla’s last sentence?”

Takumi nodded slowly. “I have some idea, but please tell me anyway.”

“If Hoshido want to threaten Nohr, all we have to do is let Lady Varenil tell the rebellious force of the Duke’s original plot. Once the news spreads and Cheve learns of King Garon’s role in this, it would be quite easy to pull other Chevois leaders to our side. Princess Camilla wanted to tell us that they are aware of our options. If we choose to flip, they are prepared. It was a warning.”

“How could they figure everything out so fast…” Takumi muttered, then his eyes widened “D- Do you think they knew of Nestra’s plan with King Garon beforehand?” He spoke with nervous urgency.

Ryoma only had to think for a heartbeat. “No,” he shook his head. “I doubt it. They have been telling us much more than required every time we discuss anything with them, I don’t think it can be deliberate.” When he talked to Prince Xander the day before, the prince’s expression toward Nestra’s potential causes of action seemed genuine. There was a real look of surprise in the eyes of the Nohrian royals today as well. “If they had wanted to harm Hoshido, they would have incited me to punish Nestra for playing us. Instead, they didn’t even show any inclination to punish Nestra themselves.” _And thus helped me keep my head level in the matter,_ Ryoma thought _._ “They are probably just very intelligent. And very experienced.”

Takumi shuddered, showing his young self. “Princess Camilla is scary, please excuse me for saying that.”

Ryoma laughed. “She is interesting, so are her brothers.” He thought of Prince Xander’s hardened but calm expression. Many who had met Prince Xander around the fortress told Ryoma that the man was fearsome, but personally, Ryoma didn’t think the Nohrian prince looked that forbidding. This might be thanks to the fact that he had engaged Prince Xander on the battlefield before – the man Ryoma had come to know in the past few days was nothing like the knight he had twice fought to the death, who could simultaneously raise his heartbeats, his survival instinct, _and_ his battle lust to previously unknown degrees. Instead, the ally prince was attentive, resourceful, unpretentious. The expressions that had puzzled Ryoma some days before were slowly becoming understandable. Even during the most strained moments of their exchange that afternoon, he could sense neither displeasure nor hostility from Prince Xander, only an intention to keep the tension at the right level. It was clear that not many things could truly make the prince lose his composure.

(In fact, for a little while, Ryoma had tried to crank up the pressure just to test how the Nohrian royals would respond – it turned out that Princess Camilla could let pressure roll off her back like nothing at all, while Prince Xander received it in the most passive way Ryoma had ever witnessed. It was as if any challenge sent his way simply sank into a deep pool, leaving no mark behind and suddenly making the challenger wonder if (and when) a counterattack might be fired back. With a brother and a sister like these two, of course Prince Leo didn’t have much to worry about. If the young prince felt troubled by the situation, Ryoma didn’t find the clue in his focused gaze. Together, the three siblings made a formidable trio).

Chuckling to himself, Ryoma prodded his brother. “So, what would you do if you were in my position?”

Takumi hid his face behind both hands. “Urgg… I’m not supposed to say ‘I don’t know’… Well, I would try to write to the Fourth Company about Lady Scarlet. Th-then I’d persuade them to contact other Chevois companies, then…” He trailed off.

Ryoma waited for a moment before opening his mouth, but before he could say anything, Takumi had quickly raised his voice: “Wait, wait, I know what you are going to say. I’m supposed to talk to Prince Xander again first, is that right?” His face crunched up in a miserable look.

Ryoma couldn’t help laughing. “Congratulation, you got perfect score.”

“Pfff,” Takumi pouted. “I bet if it was Prince Leo, he wouldn’t have to think at all,” he mumbled.

“Would he not?” Ryoma asked with humor.

Takumi rolled his eyes and stood up. “Just you wait, I will learn and catch up with you all. Let me go ask Azura about Lady Varenil, maybe she knows something interesting.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to ask Princess Camilla?” Ryoma teased after him as he quickly ran away.

 

*

 

It rained heavily through the night, adding to the mental burden that kept Ryoma from deep sleep. He had stayed up late with Saizo and Kagero to discuss the letter that was to be sent to Scarlet’s soldiers. The weight of the matter haunted him into his slumber. In the end, it was the quietness after the storm that made him fully awake. He left his tent to come to the camp fire, nodding to the two soldiers on watch sitting in a dark corner nearby. It was too early, before even the near-dawn time, when any activity could be expected around camp.

Considering that everything, earth or wood, was completely soaked by the rain, it didn’t matter what Ryoma sat on. He chose a spot a little away from the fire, pulled out a small bundle and, unfolding the layers of oilcloth, took out his simple whittling tools and the wooden sculpture he had been working on. This was his way to release stress when time was tight. Maybe by the time the camp woke up, he would be able to finish the fine details for one or two branches of this tree figurine.

But of course he was not the only nocturnal creature in this army. Not long after, the silhouette of Prince Xander appeared at the other side of the camp ground. The man stood still and looked at the fire, directly in line with Ryoma. Unsure if he could be seen or not, Ryoma vaguely nodded toward the prince.

Then Prince Xander really started to walk toward him. _Great eyesight,_ Ryoma remarked. As he watched the light and certain steps of the knight proceeding through the veil of darkness, Ryoma had an illusion of receiving a visit from a large feline predator in its leisure stroll. For a split second, a strange thrill of admiration ran down his spine.

“How do you do, Prince Ryoma?” Prince Xander greeted him.

“Not too bad, seeing that I’m not the only one up at this hour,” Ryoma smiled, waving the tiny gouge in his hand. “Just doing some hobby of mine.”

“You carve?” The Nohrian prince sat down the damp ground, legs crossed comfortably.

“From time to time. I come by some great pieces of broken wood when I travel around. It’s kind of a convenient hobby to have.”

“Wouldn’t it hurt your eyes to work under such low light?”

“It is all right. I touch more than see.” He casually held the little sculpture toward Prince Xander, who gently received it with both hands.

Ryoma watched as the prince caressed the details, tracing from the jutting tree roots to the crevices between branches. “Is this… a banyan tree?” he said tentatively. “I have only seen it in books.”

“You guessed well. It is a fascinating species to me, and a good challenge too.” Ryoma had always admired the image of the old banyans, with young prop roots hanging down like delicate curtains while mature ones form strong columns that ever expand the kingdom under foliage. Sadly, with the small size of this sculpture, he could only attempt a bonsai one.

“It is too humble of you to say that this is merely out of convenience. You are a wonderful craftsman.” Prince Xander said after an almost reverent study of the sculpture and returned Ryoma’s work to him.

“Thank you,” Ryoma said. In his hand, the small tree suddenly looked much better than he used to think, all thanks to a praise from the other man. “What would you do in this kind of time?”

“I used to practice with my sword, or with my pen if conditions don’t allow,” the prince said, then quickly added, “I don’t mean writing my own work. I copy down others’, just getting used to the feeling of put down something on a paper. It makes me feel more at ease when I eventually have to write something.”

“There has got to be more to it,” Ryoma chuckled, enjoying the mood. “I am convinced that the pen in your hand must be mighty, you are commanding the whole of Nohr from here with it after all.”

At this, the Nohrian prince fell quiet. Ryoma took the opportunity to extend a hand to him. “All jokes aside, I think we can agree that both of us have passed the first test.”

Prince Xander raised his eyebrows at him, then smiled and took his hand. “Gladly. Although I must say that I regret the tone of that conversation.”

Ryoma shook his head. “I think you knew exactly what I was doing as well, so we are equal.”

Looking at Prince Xander’s simple smile, Ryoma knew that without need for much word, they had reached a mutual understanding. With the discussion that transpired the day before, they had shown to each other their true characters in tough negotiations, and Ryoma could boldly say that both sides were pleased, despite the apparently thorny topics. If they could take the kind of heat that they purposely threw at each other like that without getting offended, then readily come back here to sit side by side, it meant that their visions of how an alliance should work were more similar than different. Takumi was too inexperienced to realize the need for this type of trial. If he had attended court more, he would have met Hoshido’s most difficult courtiers and understood what it took to separate true friends from disguised foes in the political sphere. What Ryoma and the Nohrian siblings did was simply to take advantage of an existing circumstance to evaluate each other.  

“What can we do for Cheve now, Prince Xander?” Ryoma asked straight to the point.

His ally was unfazed. “I would like to write to the Duke of Cheve and advise him to reach out to the Fourth Company. I think that the time is right for me to start undoing some of my father’s oppressive action. At the same time, my offer will serve as a negotiation advantage.”

The words were bold, but Ryoma did not question them. He nodded. “If the Duke agree to do so, I can encourage Scarlet’s soldiers toward the same direction. As for Nestra… I personally think that Lady Varenil should be watched for a little more time.” The night before, Takumi had returned with the information that Azura did not know of any political activity by the patrician. With some reluctance, he also mentioned that Princess Camilla shared the same opinion (Ryoma took pity on him and didn’t ask about the source of that information).

“I will consider the details of the plot between Nestra and Nohr. If the Duke’s next step is as Lady Varenil described, it should be possible for us to stop him,” Prince Xander said.

“In time, should I tell the lady that you oppose King Garon’s plan, or would you like to contact her group of leaders yourself first?” Ryoma asked, testing the water a little.

Prince Xander thought for a moment, then said: “I will put my trust in your judgement of the patrician.”

This also meant that the prince trust Ryoma to judge whether his intention for a peaceful solution was genuine or not. Ryoma looked the profile of the man, now softer and younger in the shadow of the night. In his heart, a delicate string seemed to hum, tickling him with a gentle and curious feeling.

“I believe I have mentioned this inquiry before, but what is your view on glory?” He asked in a low voice. “How do you envision peace for this continent?”

Ryoma didn’t expect these serious questions to sound so light on his lips. The words dissolved into the night as if they were minuscule compared to the scale of the forest; the atmosphere around them returned to complete serenity. _Easy. Easy is the feeling I have around him,_ he realized. He almost asked himself how this was possible, but the peacefulness around discouraged even that line of thought.

As Prince Xander pondered at length, Ryoma started whittling once again.

Eventually, the Nohrian prince let out an audible breath and said: “You strike me as a frank person, so I will beg to be the same. I think glory is just a pretty word for anything a ruler wants to put on a pedestal. A pedestal for his people to look up to, not necessarily himself.”

Surprised, Ryoma turned to look at him. The prince was sitting very straight, his eyes stared into Ryoma’s while his arms stayed relaxed on two knees. “I needed to say that because I know how the term ‘glory of Nohr’ is frequently used inside and outside of my kingdom. You wouldn’t have asked me about it if you didn’t think it significant. But, all in all, it is merely an invention to gather support from the public, a mirage to fall in love with, much like the method that the Duke of Nestra uses to instill pride in his people. It suggests some kind of purpose, promises some kind of golden future, where a people who has long been struggling with life will have everything they ever wanted. It also carries a strong sense of alienation against outsiders, and thus serves aggressive leaders very well. Seeing that in the last twenty years, it had secured neither wealth nor joy for my people, I would be happy to forget about that word as soon as possible.”

Still stunned, Ryoma listened to the prince’s words as they rang ever clearer and brighter, even as they remained absolutely gentle. “In every practical sense, however, a pedestal will always be demanded, so let’s put peace on it,” Prince Xander smiled. “I still have to learn about your definition for peace, especially since Hoshido seems to have so much success with it, so I wouldn’t presume that I can have a vision for the whole continent. For my part, I can only hope to make it known that abuse won’t be tolerated within the reach of my power. Does this sound too ambitious for you?”

Working through his astonishment, Ryoma had to laugh. He had assumed that the answer would be defensive of Nohr or heroic against King Garon, maybe both. Instead, what he got was a delightful mix of pragmatic idealism and daring diplomacy. It probably wouldn’t have gone over very well with a typical leader, but the prince had chosen to throw it at Ryoma. And Ryoma? Ryoma couldn’t wait for more.

“Your speed of thought amazes me, Prince Xander,” Ryoma tried to keep his laughter down to be polite. “I must say one thing, and I would like apologize if it offends you, but I couldn’t understand how you could change your stance on the conflict between our countries so quickly until I heard what you said just now.”

“It seems inconsistent, doesn’t it?” Prince Xander said lightly. “I am aware that I have a reputation of being a loyalist. Yet you should know that you have me wondering too, Prince Ryoma. You have been very tolerant toward us Nohrians ever since we joined, considering that Nohr is much to be blamed for the sorrows of your family and your country. Your courtesy far surpasses what a truce requires, I can’t help but feeling hopeful.”

“Ah, that.” Ryoma had to take a moment to find a response. “Well, I know that you and your siblings are risking many things to be here. I have also had the chance to hear all of you express your opinions in the past few days. In your words I have found wisdom, kindness, patience; you are not narrow-minded people and I feel bound to listen for more. So Prince Xander, I guess that I, too, is seeing hope.”

The look of immense relief that crossed the prince’s face made Ryoma regret that he didn’t chose even more eager words. In an instant, though, the frown had returned between the brows of the man. “I am happy to hear you say so. As for my part, to be fast is the only choice,” Prince Xander said quietly. “I am afraid that even now we might not be quick enough. One wrong word, one skirmish, and the chance for justice might be gone. I am a cynic, I think that from the eyes of the powerful, justice is probably just an illusion, but for any peace to last, people have to believe that there is more or less a prospect of justice in it. The problem is when violence breaks out, revenge is often perceived to be the only type of justice acceptable. For the victim, any peace might already be too late.”

And now Ryoma shuddered. To hear those words from a Nohrian royal was too ironic. It was also too bittersweet, because he had always wished for someone to talk to about the kinds of difficult feelings that his position must bring. As the eldest son reared by King Shumeragi, Queen Ikona, and then Queen Mikoto, he was standing on the shoulders of giants, but nothing could ever replace a peer, and Ryoma could recall more than one time when he had wished someone would simply tell him ‘Aye, that’s tough’ instead of the customary ‘You can do it, we believe in you’. He certainly did not expect to find a similar mind under these circumstances – a mind that was even willing to confide in him about having unpopular opinions.

“I understand. Trust me, I understand,” he said hastily, not caring that this made him sound anxious. He _was_ anxious to speak. “You are not alone. Nohr is not alone and neither is Hoshido. We will work through this together, Prince Xander.”

In that moment, even in the darkness, Ryoma knew that the eyes looking at him were bright. He saw the tension leaving Prince Xander’s broad frame, listened to the quiet sigh, and felt the unplaceable string inside him hummed again. In a corner of his mind, he started to wander among the ifs – if he could ask Prince Xander more about this and that, if the prince would share with him his opinions, if he wouldn’t mind sparring again…

As they slowly talked about Cheve and waited for dawn, a part of Ryoma thought about the distance they had bridged that day, an unknown void in his heart now filled with a sense of wonder.

 

\----------

\----------

 

 _One, two, three, four, five_. Five days were the time it took for the scouting group to meet the child Anthony. Five days were the time Hinoka had the army all to herself, together with the enormous amount of work it entailed. All in all, Hinoka thought that she didn’t do too badly. Their soldiers were getting along rather well, even if this achievement could not be compared to the camaraderie that seemed to have bloomed among the members of the scouting group.

She stretched out on the grass and closed her eyes to fully enjoy the warm breeze brusing over her face. The war was worrying, but it shouldn’t stop her from appreciating what nice things were around. Their fortress was secure and full of convenient facilities, she really had no reason to be tense all the time. Besides, Hinoka knew that the people around her were always watchful, even the absent-minded Setsuna, or young Sakura, or the ever confident Nohrian princess…

Hinoka lightly tutted at herself. These days, her thought was often drawn to Camilla. The process felt natural, but she was vaguely aware that their connection was going deeper faster than a typical acquaintance or friendship. The signs of this was showing in quite unexpected ways as well. For one thing, it seemed that everyone from Hoshido had started to see her as a proxy to Camilla, especially her family. Whenever Camilla said or did anything, Ryoma and Takumi would glance at Hinoka to see her reaction first, as if she would know what kind of response was needed. Takumi almost always used her as a mental (and physical) shield when he saw Camilla – a habit that had only slightly improved ever since he became good friend with Prince Leo (this in itself was a rapid development that Hinoka wished she was there to witness, she bet that it was entertaining).

The other thing was that she really had been paying more attention to Camilla in the last couple of days.

The scouting trip could be considered successful, yet Hinoka felt that Camilla was not as cheerful as before. There was a subdued feeling to her. After the trip, Ryoma and Takumi had told Hinoka about their talk regarding Cheve, the Nohrians were also not skirting around it, so she doubted that Camilla’s mood could be accounted for by this problem. Her friend seemed to be the type who would voice her concern as soon as she thought of them, unless the matter was very difficult. In this case, the possible cause must be related to their troop’s progress into Valla. Yet what could it be that Camilla had to keep it to herself?

It was some time later when Hinoka heard light footsteps drawing near. A shadow fell over her eyes, but the newcomer didn’t seem rushed to speak. Hinoka felt them sitting down next to her, felt their gaze on her for a moment or two, the peaceful atmosphere seemed almost unbreakable.

“Please don’t be with your guard down like this out here,” finally came the gentle voice.

“…Hello, Camilla,” Hinoka said leisurely, eyes still shut. She took in a lungful of the beautiful fragrance. _My fighting instinct didn’t so much as stir when she approached,_ she thought. Camilla was always a sight to behold, especially in battle, yet whenever she came near you, that radiance would melt into something sweet, soft, familiar, as old as comfort itself. Hinoka never thought a young woman could have such a disarming maternal aura about her.

“I’m still awake,” she lied a bit, smiled and opened her eyes, but what greeted her was a grave expression. “What is the matter, Camilla?”

“I’m sorry if my words are sour, but I am serious. You need to be more suspicious. Suspect me, even.”

“I’m always sharp,” Hinoka faked a cough. “Is something bothering you, may I ask?”

The Nohrian princess looked at her then sighed. She lied down on the side next to Hinoka and rested her head on a folded arm. Her other hand started to play with the long decorative ribbon on Hinoka’s shirt.

 _She felt so close,_ Hinoka thought she could feel the ghost of Camilla’s warm breaths on her cheek. She blushed, but didn’t feel embarrassed.

“You know that Anankos pays special attention to Corrin. By extension, all of us here need to be careful,” Camilla said softly.

“…Are you thinking about the attack that happened when we jumped into the canyon?” Hinoka asked.

“Hmn,” Camilla made a sound of agreement. “But let me tell you. Before our first confrontation on your soil, my siblings and I have heard words that Iago and… the Nohrian throne would give Corrin orders that intended to make her spirit suffer. In light of what we know now, that was a sign.” She briefly shut her eyes. “At the time, we felt horrible, but pain has become so normalized in our mind that when we didn’t consider a real escape path for her. I guess it really shows how indoctrinated we were, try as we may to deny it. Incorrigible, like you and your brother has said.  A part of me is glad that Corrin decided to leave Nohr.”

“You don’t-” Hinoka started to say, still bewildered by Camilla’s sudden grimness, but Camilla had said. “There’s more.”

“After we told you that the Nohrian force has been ordered to stop its advance on Hoshido, we watched – any spy by Anankos in this joined army would have immediately relayed that information back to their master. Yet Anankos didn’t lift a finger to reverse Xander’s order. We are not even declared traitor. I am not sure what that speaks of, arrogance, lunacy, or a promise of something worse to come. But- But I have a premontion.” Camilla sighed. “Hinoka, my darling, if my father is sick in his mind then that dragon must be ten folds worse, and there’s a chance that it is fixated on Corrin. Now that our sister has arrived in Valla, maybe it won’t stop at anything to cause her pain. That… may include harming those who are dear to her in ways we have not imagined.”

Hinoka was stunned. “What madness!” she murmured. The idea was too new for her to be able to fully take up, but her heart was shook by the Camilla’s passion. Camilla had not truly described anything, yet there was a specificity in her tone that suggested she have already visualize a few horrid scenarios in vivid details.

Then Hinoka realized the most urgent thing. “Wait, you made a bet when you decided to tell us. You… You risked your own future!”

“No more than what is inevitable, my dear.” Camilla said soothingly.

Hinoka couldn’t wrap her head around it. She knew those words were technically true, but how could Camilla face everything with such calmness? How could her brothers? When the Nohrian royals followed Corrin, they must have understood that they would be hunted forever, regardless of whether King Garon was truly possessed or not. If Hinoka was in the same situation, she would either be paralyzed by anguish or put all of her mind into fighting by Corrin’s side and try to forget her problem. She would never be able to stare straight at it, to dissect each detail and possibility to tease out every bit that could be useful like these Nohrians could.

To live in so much doubt…

“Please don’t frown.” Something cool caressed her cheek. The back of Camilla’s hand. “I’m sorry for what I said.”

“No, don’t feel sorry. Don’t stop.” Hinoka didn’t shrink from the touch. “Tell me more.” She turned to look at Camilla’s gentle eyes.

The princess retracted her hand anyway. “…You must be questioning how we could be so certain. The truth is, when hunger for power and dominance become the only things that drive a mind, you will recognize it. My brothers and I have had much experience with that kind of people.” Camilla laughed darkly. “You might be at a loss because you are not sure how to picture such hideous personality, nor do you feel it appropriate to think twisted thoughts of hypothetic people. Well, you shouldn’t feel bad if your heart tries to shield you from this topic. It is protecting the goodness in you.”

The bitter tone made Hinoka’s skin prickle. She asked: “So are you also thinking that Anthony only appeared because Corrin came along?

“It is possible.”

“I… will pay attention.”

Camilla chuckled. “Please do. I’m afraid you are too compassionate. You let me come so close to you, after all.”

Hinoka disagreed with this. Something in her knew that the force that pulled them together was reciprocal, that Camilla gave her special treatment as well. The colorful endearments had mostly dropped, there was no more dramatic taunting or gushing, just an easy familiarity. When they lose the sense of time in needlework, Camilla didn’t try to fill the silence anymore. She also doubted that Camilla would have the current conversation with just any other person.  “You are the one who let me come close to you,” Hinoka said, simply stating a truth.

Yet it seemed to surprise Camilla. For an instance, she froze and looked at Hinoka, very still. The light that flashed in her eye tickled Hinoka’s intuition, making Hinoka turn and grab her arm. “What is worrying you, Camilla?” Hinoka asked. “Of course I still suspect Anthony, I know at least to do that even without you telling me the underlying reason for your doubt. Something is clearly burdening you, please let me help.”

It took Camilla some time to recover from the shock. When she did, her expression was soft yet reserved. She gently closed a hand around Hinoka’s wrist to lift the hand away. Even the way she laid Hinoka’s hand on the grass was full of care.

Then she took a breath and said: “When I talk about trust and doubt, maybe I should explain myself to you so that you do not mistaken.”

“It comes naturally to me that I should adore you. You carry yourself beautifully and love your siblings even more so. In my heart, I know I care for you without inhibition; if I come close to you, that’s because I can’t help it. There is, however, a logical part in us that must measure and judge with facts.” Camilla’s smile didn’t reach her eyes. “When my brother asked me if I trusted any Hoshidan royal, including you, I could only tell him that I merely had a hunch. This I spoke in light of my responsibility toward my troops and my kingdom. I cherish getting to know all of you, but maybe throughout this war, a hunch will be all I have to continue fighting alongside Hoshidans. It is probably the same for my brothers and it should be the same for you. Each of us is taking our own leap of faith. Be careful, Hinoka, because I don’t think you are guarding yourself enough. I would hate to see you disappointed.”

The words hit Hinoka like a splash of ice water. _This is absurd!_ Camilla was basically telling her that there couldn’t be complete trust between them, despite the relationship they have built together in the pass months – one that even Camilla couldn’t deny and that Hinoka knew with her whole heart to be true. The postion would make sense had it come from a guarded mind, but Camilla was not like that. She was the very image of someone who understood herself, who was fully aware of exactly what she valued and how she would protect them. Yet here she was, trying to tell Hinoka that the situation between Nohr and Hoshido should stop them from becoming too friendly. In Hinoka’s eyes, this could only mean that Camilla was being afraid of their closeness. _Which is the most ridiculous thing to be associated with Camilla_ , her mind reeled.

It was even harder to understand because she was clearly trying to be gentle at the same time as being frank. Hinoka searched her friend’s face for a hint, but Camilla just looked more and more closed off.

It was a painful thought. If Camilla refuse to open up any further, Hinoka would be defeated. The truth was that to be able to understand, she needed something that Camilla hadn’t told her. Hinoka felt powerless and and a little fearful for not being able to guess it, like a child who got lost in the thick fog at dusk, certain of what she ought to do but panicking nonetheless. “I- I can’t see what is wrong,” she said with only faint hope. “I do believe that there can be real trust among us, you know. Maybe Corrin has pushed us together, but I am sure that you and I have trust, and we are not alone or special. I have been working and- and building and seeing trust among our soldier. You need to be more confident in what we can have. I-I…”

Her voice faltered as she looked into Camilla’s calm eyes. After a while, her friend smiled tightly. “Oh, Hinoka,” Camilla said with fondness, one hand brushing Hinoka’s cheek again, the other pushing herself to stand up.

And Hinoka knew that her words had not reached. Not at all.

“You always think for other people, I should feel ashamed.” Camilla said as she looked down at Hinoka from above. “My dear, I have been silly. Do forget what nonsense I have sprouted and please forgive me.” Her face showed that she had made her decision, one that Hinoka could no longer try to inquire or sway, and she left as swiftly as she had arrived.

Turning her head away from the sight of the retreating princess, Hinoka lay like that for a moment, heart filled with dismay. Then she rolled into fetal position and groaned loudly out of frustration. Something cold and lumpy rose from her stomach to her throat, bringing with it an unknown anger. There was a façade that she needed to punch through, if only she could see it more clearly…

*

Heavy mood followed Hinoka back to the royal living quarter. As she entered the building, she found her elder brother sitting at the table in the common room with some papers in hand. Ryoma seemed to enjoy taking care of works here, where many people could come up and talk to him.

“Hinoka, you’ve got to see this,” he said to her, head slightly shaking while a wry smile appeared on his lips. What he handed her was another letter from Yukimura.

 

_My lord,_

_I thought that I should write about this to you in a separate letter from our usual correspondents. I apologise for not answering your second inquiry regarding our intelligence of Nohr earlier. As I finally understood the depth your concern, I felt the need to reflect very carefully on this matter, and only after thinking for the past week did I feel ready to write to you._

_The answer is yes, our people must have been ignorant; this is the unavoidable conclusion. It pains me to say that I can envision how this has come to be. With the differences between our cultures, an attitude of ‘us versus them’ can easily take root. It might have begun anywhere, in the heart of a field agent in Nohr, the officer who decide which news is to be reported to higher ranks, or even the minister who oversee everything related to the subject. Apathy and hatred can blind us even to the inevitable consequences of our actions. I can understand because I was a sinner as well. I used to plan battle tactics that spared no thought for the enemy, that made no effort to give them a chance to surrender or convince their commander to call for ceasefire. I was cold-hearted and short-sighted, so I saw the enemy as dispensable and willfully ignored the humanity underneath their armors. Thankfully, your wise father had corrected me and I often remind myself to be grateful for his lesson._

_Yet somehow our current situation makes me think that I have learnt nothing. I am ashamed to realize that discrimination must have taken deep roots in my heart, I have not considered the possibility that many others might fall victim to a similar mindset, nor did I recognize the symptoms when they must have shown themselves in my daily work. I have failed you as I have failed King Shumeragi. I can only ask you for a chance to stop this venom and atone for my mistake…_

 

Hinoka read on. Yukimura’s words stayed firm but also became increasingly dejected. Eyes still on the page, she reached out one hand and blindly searched around for a chair to sit down. “What did you write to him, brother?” She mumbled at last. “He sounds so grave.” Yukimura had poured his heart out in the letter. Hinoka never expected to find so much emotion in the man, much less in his written words.

“I… don’t think I asked anything out of ordinary?” Ryoma pinched his nose. “I merely clarified to him my suspicions on the role of Hoshido in the matters that Prince Leo had mentioned. Being confronted with those opinions probably upset him, just like how it had upset us. In Hoshido, we rarely get to hear such differing perspectives. Yukimura is a dedicated man, he has been taking care of state matters for so many years. He must have felt as if his efforts and principles were being challenged.”

“Friends and foes, all mirrors on the wall _,_ ” Hinoka said and sighed. “We do learn a new thing every day, don’t we?”

Ryoma nodded. “Learning from friends is much more pleasant, that’s why I’m going to see Prince Xander now.” He picked up a couple of things that were resting on his laps and put them on the table. One was the banyan tree sculpture that he seemed to have finished. The other was a small ceramic bottle. From the shape and the seal, Hinoka guessed that it was a tiny wine flask.

Ryoma gestured at the bottle, then at his carving. “An offer of peace. An offer of friendship,” he explained, smiling a little. “I asked for permission from our commander to have liquor on this special occasion.”

Although the gifts were simple, Hinoka was still surprised by the seriousness in her brother. “Why do you sound so formal? From what I see, Prince Xander already considers you a friend.” As someone who did not go on the trip, she was in the best position to recognize the tremendous change in the men’s relationship after all.

“I know that well,” Ryoma stated, simply and with confidence. “But I want there to be an affirmation for his sake. He should have no doubt that I will do my best to support him in changing Nohr’s situation. Our allies shouldn’t have to worry about Hoshido’s position anymore, I hope that this knowledge would lift some of the burden off their shoulders.”

Startled, Hinoka thought of the words she had heard from Camilla. “You are very right,” she said with feelings. “I can tell that they are worrying. They must have a lot on their hands right now.”

“You don’t say,” her brother sighed. “Do you know how they are managing things in Nohr? They write. They write to lords and ladies, generals and priests, local leaders, guild leaders, influential intellectuals, old acquaintances and old rivals, friends and friends of friends, you name it. Anyone they think they should sway, they try until they do. Nohr does not take their commands without question, so in actuality, there is very little commanding, just a lot of persuasion. Prince Xander likes to call it ‘coercion’, that’s his self-mocking humor.”

“And I don’t know how they get things done so fast either.” Ryoma continued. “Their reach goes far. The court of Cheve has already started talking to us. The Duke of Nestra is showing signs of being open to more honest conversations. Wasn’t I riding on my horse by their side for most of the scouting trip? When did this all happened?” He laughed and stood up. “Prince Xander trusts me enough to tell me about the people he and his siblings contact, yet knowing when things happened couldn’t help me explain the speed of these progresses. I think I’m probably still in too much awe to be able to analyze with a clear mind.”

The warm expression on Ryoma’s face made Hinoka smile. _Now you are as invested in their wellbeing as I do. What is happening to us, brother dear?_

With a chuckle, she said: “I don’t think you are the only one who feels like that. Before we knew it, they have won all of us over to their side. So go on, brother, use your charming self to learn the secrets of their trade and teach them to me.”

 _As for my part, I won’t give up either_ , she thought. _Wait for me, Camilla._

 

\----------

\----------

 

With Anthony as their guide, the army started an unconventional march toward Anankos’s castle. A few encounters with small towns and wary Valites by the help of the child had brought a generic map of the kingdom into their hands. Now, they move forward bit by bit, sending out scouts before marching. This also allowed most of the army to have a lot of time in camp for training and other works.

It was during one of those stationed days when Takumi walked into the living room of the Nohrians’ side of the building. He headed straight for the stairs, until an unintelligible noise alerted him of the presence of another person in the room.

“Hnnnnn.” Niles waved, his chewing mouth prevented him from giving a proper greeting. The archer was holding a bunch of cookies in his hand, which had strangely become a more frequent sight.

“Did Felicia do something to you again?” Takumi asked, almost with sympathy. Niles’s attitude toward him had improved greatly these days, the man had even started coaching Sakura. Takumi was certain that Leo did talk to Niles after all, but by now he didn’t mind that anymore.

“Hnn, not really,” Niles tried to talk around the baked goods. “Jakob and I made a bet on who would get her apology cookies when she brought the tea this morning. If he got scorched then I would get the cookies, and vice versa.”

“But you were sure that someone would get burnt?!” Takumi raised his eyebrows.

“Of course, that happens more often than not. Besides, that checky lady with the giant hairdo predicted it. She only refused to say who would be the victim.”

 _If Orochi heard you describe her like that, she would have made sure that you were more than burnt,_ Takumi thought. “You are starting to hang out with them rather a lot huh? Not that I’m complaining.”

“There’s infinite entertainment to them, my lord, I wouldn’t like to miss any. Seriously, if this war doesn’t turn out as peachy as we hope, forming a joint traveling troupe might as well help us reconquer the land.”

“‘Seriously’, you said,” a different voice joined them from above the stairs, “But I hope you didn’t mean it.” Princess Camilla appeared. “Because I know what I would like for you to do in a troupe, and it’s not simply shooting apples off people’s heads.”

“But what else could I do for you, Lady Camilla?” Niles asked as the princess stepped toward them.

“Oh, you will be the foul mouth who get punished by society, most definitely. Hello, Takumi dear.” Princess Camilla smiled at Takumi and ignored Niles’s pout.

Takumi’s heart still sped up like a rabbit’s whenever the Nohrian princess turned her attention to him, but he had learnt to stop his legs from automatically running away. He scrambled to say hi to her.

“It is lovely to see you here so often, but I have been wondering, why don’t you use the door connecting the hallway of the third floor?” Princess Camilla asked, “We have unlocked the one on the second floor for a while now already.”

Takumi laughed awkwardly and inched around the princess to run upstairs, his face flushing a little. For almost two weeks now, he and Leo had been in an out of each other’s room pretty much every day, regardless of how many other things were in their schedules. Ryoma met with Prince Xander just as frequently, but they were often fine with staying in public places like the living rooms and the mess hall. This was because no one would dare to listen in or interject into their conversations. He and Leo, on the other hand, only felt comfortable in seclusion. Unlocking the door seemed like the logical thing to do, yet Takumi was still reluctant to propose it. The pressure only increased when he learnt that Hinoka had pushed for the door on the second floor to be opened. If only he could find an excuse…

The hallway on the third floor was completely quiet. Leo’s door was ajar, but Takumi could hear no movement. With a finger, he gently pushed the door open, and what he found was his friend sleeping on the bed, fully dressed and seemingly exhausted. It was clear that Leo wanted to get things done but his body had decided otherwise. He lay with an arm and a leg wrapping around the bunched-up blanket, his lips slightly parted, his hair falling messily onto the soft cheeks that often made Takumi want to pinch.

 _Look at you, my friend,_ Takumi thought and smiled.

He sat down on the edge of the mattress and looked at the pile of paper haphazardly shuffled together next to Leo. He recognized the _go_ play board that they had drawn by hand on a piece of paper at the bottom. (The two little bags holding the playing stones were on the nightstand – these were basically a growing collection of white and dark pebbles that Sakura and Princess Elise were too happy to gather for them. At the rate these girls were going, Takumi would be able to return to Oboro the buttons that he had borrowed from her very soon.) On top of the board was the list of trivia that their little sisters had compiled for the small game the other day– of course there was no way Leo would let that kind of information escape from his hands. Finally, the thickest stack of papers contained Corrin’s battle exercises. Takumi looked at the answers his sister had scrawled down, at Leo’s comments on them, then picked up a short pencil stub from the nightstand to add his own words.

By the time he got to the third one, something gently poked at his rib. “This one writes better,” Leo said in a sleepy voice, pointing a different pencil at him.

Takumi took the pencil, but only to put it on the nightstand together with the papers he was holding. “When did you go to sleep this morning?” It must have been morning.

“Not any later than usual.” Leo stretched. “It’s just that your brother was up talking with Xander so late, there was no guessing when he would leave and Xander would notice the light under my door. He always comes by to tell me off when he sees it late at night, so after midnight, I went into the bathroom and sat on the floor to finish checking Corrin’s exercises. It was a little more tiring than doing so in bed.”

It was such a stubborn and round-about way to avoid one or two lines of gentle scolding, but Takumi knew exactly how that kind of decision typically came about. “I usually take refuge in my retainer’s room,” he confessed.

“Well, I’m not doing that anytime soon, especially not in Odin’s room.” Leo put a hand on Takumi’s shoulder to push himself up, crawled out of bed and fixed his appearance.

“You can go to Hinata’s. I’ll talk to him, I bet he won’t mind at all, and he can keep quiet while you work, despite how loud he normally acts.”

“That… might be a surprisingly apt solution. At least he probably won’t sell me out to Xander or Camilla.” Leo nodded, then started to steer Takumi out of his room. “Now, let’s go to the lake.”

“I want to ask Nyx something,” Leo said as they headed out of the building. “She seems most at ease when she is alone out there, so I’m hoping that we can catch her today.”

“Oh…” Takumi was a little taken aback. He had heard stories about Nyx. Even though he told himself not to judge, from the day he learnt of her past, he couldn’t help seeing her as someone that he didn’t know how to face. Nyx’s experiences sounded unfathomable to him, making him reluctant to interact with her.

Leo didn’t explain further about his intention, and Takumi didn’t ask. This was becoming another habit of him. Strangely, he was more patient next to Leo. Takumi could trust his friend to tell him stories when he should hear them, to ask the right questions and give him space to think at the right time. It wasn’t that he had never felt the urge to babble out a million questions at once, it’s only that he had learnt Leo’s pace. He used to think that a genius’s thoughts would be like lightnings, always racing and striking, yet Leo’s thoughts unfold slowly – not necessarily in the sense of time, but in the sense of approach. Step by step, layer by layer, they grew methodically and cautiously, until their owner deemed the case fit for presentation. If Takumi wait instead of demanding for an immediate answer, somewhere along the way Leo would let him into the thought flow as well, and then he would be able to hear all of Leo’s ideas and poke them around as an unobtrusive playmate.

Being an insider was a wonderful feeling. He never felt left out like when he listened to Yukimura and Ryoma shooting out ideas.

The ‘lake’, as they called it, was more of a large pond with immeasurable depth. The water was crystal clear, yet if looking down from above, one could only see the white stone bank quickly descending into darkness. Even the air around it was different. For a while before they reached the place, Takumi could already feel cold breezes coming from its direction. When they finally saw the turquoise body of water nestled among tall tufts of blooming pampas grass, a calming but melancholic atmosphere had wrapped around them.  

“It’s as if we have entered yet another realm,” Takumi muttered. “No wonder Azura comes here so often.” He stood to watch as spots of sunlight danced on the water surface, mesmerized by the contrast between their brilliance and the blue water.

After a while, Leo tucked at his sleeve and led him to a spot to sit down. “If you like this kind of place, I should take you to see the glacial lakes in Nohr when you have the chance to visit,” he said.

“You can take me any place you want,” Takumi shrugged, “I’m sure I will like them all.”

Leo laughed at that. “Any idea about what my brother and yours might have talked about last night?”

“I don’t know if this is it, but my brother mentioned that he would talk to Prince Xander about helping Nohr with the food crisis soon.”

“You can’t give us an aid, at least not officially,” Leo immediately said.

“No, we know that would be complicated right now. In name, the offer will be made to Cheve as a reassurance that we want peace in their land and as, you know, a disguised apology to them, because we need to keep our pride. Lady Scarlet’s soldiers will escort the envoy back to Cheve – that will be our excuse for the Fourth Company to return to their homeland. Via an agreement between Cheve and Nohr, a large part of the offering will be transfered to Nohr afterward. We are sure that the Duke would agree to this. It would help him kill the seed of discordance between Cheve and Hoshido, reduce much of the tension with Nohr, and it’s not like he has to pay much money for anything.”

Leo’s expression became more excited with each sentence from Takumi. “That’s right!” he said, his eyes sparkled. “More over, the troops that we withdrew from Cheve are still being stationed near the border. Once the envoy reaches Nohr, our troops can take over the transportation part. _That_ will also be a good excuse to take them further away from Cheve and basically end the campaign against the rebellious force; the Duke will definitely be pleased.”

“It’s a win-win situation,” Takumi said, happy to see Leo’s joyful smile. “And Ryoma don’t want to consider it an aid. It’s a solution to the Cheve problem that we took part in making worse. There’s no debt here.”

“Nah, I won’t let you guys say that. Xander certainly won’t. It’s not really Hoshido’s fault.”

“Well, you know that it doesn’t matter how much we are or are not at fault. The main point is that we are in a position to give the solution. Besides, it’s not like Nohr is not doing its part. You three are the ones who built the diplomatic channel between Cheve and us.”

“Hmn,” Leo lightly shook his head and looked down, apparently returned to deep thoughts. Takumi looked at him with both exasperation and amusement. To the Nohrian royals, returning favors seemed to be a vital aspect to showing trust and loyalty among allies, so important that once the idea entered Leo’s mind, he had to drop everything else and start thinking about it. This was just one of the many surprising findings that had changed Takumi’s perception about the qualities of the Nohrian people. Their value scale was indeed different from the Hoshidan’s, but neither was inherently better. Differences were just… differences, and now Takumi had begun to appreciate where the moral systems connect or diverge.

Left to himself, he leaned back on his hands and looked up to the sky, watching idle wisps of clouds drape across the blue vault. He was starting to consider taking a nap when he heard the rustles of grass, then a sigh.

“There goes my peaceful time,” Nyx said. “May I ask for the reason of this ambush?”

“Won’t you take a seat with us, Nyx?” Leo asked.

“No, I only come here to dip my body into the water until I look like I’m about to drown myself,” the mage replied with a cool gaze. “That is something I prefer to do alone.”

“I know you don’t like to be bothered. I simply want to ask a question, it won’t take long,” Leo insisted with an even tone.

Nyx put her hands on her hips and stared them down for a moment. Then she heaved another dramatic sigh, sat down in front of them and folded her legs. “Well? Shoot them, and don’t annoy me with pleasantries.”

Leo nodded. He went straight to the topic. “My father, or in fact, Iago, has brought in many independent dark mages to join force with the court mages to create Faceless. Now that we have put an end to this… production, it would be better if the court can offer something else to these people. It will keep their activities within our control, and at least a number of them they won’t be attracted by outside ideas when they have a paid job.”

 _They won’t be attracted by other ambitious forces,_ Takumi translated Leo’s words in his mind. Instantly, he understood why Leo wanted to talk to Nyx. There was a reason that Leo would keep someone like Niles close by after all. His friend was highly aware that he didn’t have the experiences of a common Nohrian, so he always seeked to learn about them from others.

“So, hmn, I would like to ask for your advice on dealing with these independent magicians,” Leo said. “Odin and I are not familiar with their circle and- and the way they view their relationship with the court.”

“No, I imagine that you are not,” Nyx smirked, her knowing eyes seemed to be able to see through both of them. “Surely you can tell that even dark mages who work for the court are full of quirks. Naturally, the independent ones are much worse.”

“But I don’t think I will be of much help to you, little prince,” Nyx continued. “There is no ‘circle’ when it comes to freelancing dark mages. We don’t associate with each other. You are a practitioner, you understand the characteristics of dark magic – why it can be attractive, how demanding it is, what aspects of life and death it makes you think about. If a decent mage chooses to pursue the study of dark magic without the intention to become a court mage, it must be because they feel a strong connection with one or more special aspect of this art, and for some reasons this often produce mages that only know to be competitive or eremitic. I bet that the mage Iago contracted with don’t really ‘join force’ with the court mages or each other. We are deeply selfish, we don’t join things. We put our own agenda above all else, be it about material greed or a thirst for knowledge, or sometimes, simply the feeling of superiority that comes with easy power, such as in my case. If you make new offers, some will stay and some will leave, I guess doing that will serve your goal alright. I just don’t have any suggestion for you, you will have to ask those mages what they want yourself.”

“That’s-” Leo started, but then stopped, a deep frown appeared between his brows, his eyes casted down.

Nyx continued to stare at them as the silence stretched on. This time, she directed her gaze toward Takumi. Looking into those eyes, for the first time, Takumi understood why people believed Nyx when she said that she was older than she appeared. He felt unsettled by her attention, but told himself to stay calm and return the look. He hoped that it would help lighten the pressure that Nyx seemed to be giving Leo.

Subtly, he moved his hand to let his pinky touch Leo’s, giving him a little encouragement. After a while, his friend lifted his own finger and absent-mindedly tapped Takumi’s with it.

“You said that they can be competitive,” Leo finally said. “How do they usually compete? What would they compete about?”

Nyx narrowed her eyes. “Oh, my comment made you think that you can’t entice all of them with rewards, so now you want to look into using competition to keep the rest under control. Is that all you care about? Control?” She laughed sharply.

“Yes,” Leo openly admitted. “My aim is to make sure that other powers don’t try to take them in for foul purposes.”

“Not a very pretty approach huh?” Nyx flicked her glance toward Takumi, her lips curved into a smirk.

“It’s certainly not all roses,” Leo replied levelly.

“If-”, Takumi felt the need to say something, “If those mages are as you describe, Nyx, then that might be the only suitable way.”

Nyx regarded him for a few moments, head tilting to the side, before smiling enigmatically and turning back to Leo. “Heh, you even have a Hoshidan prince supporting you. Prince Leo, how is your brother doing?”

“Huh?” Both Leo and Takumi were startled.

“Your brother by blood, his Royal Highness Prince Xander, is who I meant.”

“Of course-” Leo sputtered. “Why are you asking about him?” He asked guardedly.

“Well, I’m just trying to understand the people who are asking for my help,” Nyx said, still smiling. “Your brother doesn’t seem to fit the image that rumors have built around him. I’ve seen his eyes in battle, and those do not belong to someone who has made peace with the act of killing. I’m curious about who he really is inside.” As Takumi and Leo sat there, stunned by the turn of the conversation, Nyx leaned forward, propped an arm on her knee and rested her chin on her hand. “And you, who is still a child, is trying to put on a brave face while telling me that you don’t mind doing manipulative works. Be honest, won’t you? How do you judge yourself through your own choices? You have told me of the things you want, now tell me of your fears.”

Even Takumi was shaken by these words. Next to him, Leo was pale and tense, but he managed to keep his voice even. “I make my choices and I live with them, I don’t think you need to be so concerned.”

“I’ve just told you that your brother still cannot do that. I doubt that you should be this confident,” Nyx pushed. The taunting note in her voice made Takumi’s head heat up. _She kept jumping topic, looking for an angle to attack,_ he thought.

“Don’t talk like you know my brother,” Leo spoke sharply, then addressed his challenger with a calmer voice. “I don’t do anything without believing in it. You asked for honesty. Let me explain to you that I am always true to myself. If I speak of a possible plan, I will consider throughoutly my ability to carry it until the end, mentally and logistically. You don’t have to worry about my conviction or moral burden, I don’t rush into things just because they promise desirable results.”

“That’s a better answer,” Nyx nodded, though she didn’t look any more convinced. She turned to Takumi. “Do you think so as well, Prince Takumi?”

The doubtful look in her eyes made Takumi lose composure. “I don’t think about it,” he replied hotly. All there was in his mind was an anger toward the way Nyx was trying to corner Leo. “I am not thinking about that scenario because it will not happen. I am convinced that you can help and will help, your attitude speaks of it. Isn’t it your turn to be honest now?”

Leo turned to him with a surprised look.

Takumi continued: “You are more experienced than both of us combined; in your eyes, we probably come off as simple-minded when we try to be confident, that’s why you ask about fears. Of course we do fear; we fear that we may fail and hurt other people, everyone in this camp should know this fear. Toward any attempt to move forward, I am as skeptical as you are, but if I can’t think of a better solution then I will choose to believe in bravery.” Unbeknown to him, his voice grew louder with his words. “You want to believe too, don’t you Nyx? Isn’t that why you decided to follow and observe Corrin? You want to know if an idealist like her can prevail in the end, am I right?”

A moment of frozen silence passed between them. All Takumi could hear was his own throbbing pulses.

Then Nyx started to laugh wryly. The heavy mood lifted, and Leo took in a deep breath. Nyx shook her head at Takumi, “How sharp! You make me want to apologize even when I doubt I need to. I’m sorry for underestimating both of you, princelings.”

“That’s not my intention-!” Takumi exclaimed.

“It doesn’t matter. Let me save some face, won’t you?” Nyx shushed him, smirking with a pained expression. “I understand what you meant. I will stop projecting my anxiety onto you now.”

Seeing her defeated look, Takumi was at a loss for word. Her attitude had switched too fast for him. Leo tucked his sleeve to stop him from trying to say anything else. “What should we do, Nyx?” His friend asked.

“Can you get me a list of the mages in this project? I will look through it and tell you about people that I know, then we will think of something.”

“I will do that. How is your influence over the independent mages?”

“Me? Hah. I was never influential, I was insufferably proud and aloof. The mages I have met didn’t seek me for fun or friendship.” All signs of humor drained from Nyx’s face. Her expression turned cold and distant. “Our encounters were often nasty. They typically ended with the other person never able to perform magic again, or live. Well, I guess that means my name may still stir up some emotions among the living ones.”

“I see, thank you. I appreciate your willingness to help,” Leo spoke as if he had forgotten all about Nyx’s interrogation. He stood up; Takumi gingerly followed.

Nyx craned her neck to look up at them and spoke in a solemn voice: “Princelings, I will say this for one last time and never mention the topic to you again: Maybe I am too haunted by the consequences of my past deeds, maybe you are much wiser, but be careful nonetheless. Take care of yourself and each other. I don’t want any of you to know the feeling of living in the shadow of a monstrous mistake.”

Leo looked at her for a moment then nodded gravely. “I understand. I will take care of my family as well, and I hope that you will let others care of you, Nyx.”

Nyx raised her eyebrows, “That’s a lot of responsibility you are trying to claim there.”

“I’m just saying that your feelings are valid and maybe someone can understand you,” Leo inclined his head toward Takumi. “Give it a chance.”

Nyx snorted and turned her head to dismiss them.

They quickly walked away from the area. Takumi followed Leo as he walked toward the forest instead of going straight back to their living quarters.

“Well, great job back there!” Leo extended a palm to Takumi. “I didn’t know if she would even want to listen to what I had to say. You resolved everything.”

Takumi clapped it, although he was still unsure of what he had done. “I feel like I was just lucky that she didn’t get angry.”

“I’m surprised that you have never talked to her before. You found a good point to argue.”

“Just because I could guess her didn’t mean that I knew how to talk to her in a nice way,” Takumi said. “If I can’t make her feel better, I should keep my mouth shut. That’s why I have been avoiding her.”

“Ah,” Leo nodded in understanding. He thought for a moment, then chuckled and said: “Thanks for coming to my rescue. She pushed just the right buttons to make me become defensive.”

“You seemed affected by what she said.”

“Did it show that much?”

“No-” _Not if I don’t know you_ , Takumi thought. “I just wonder if there is something that particularly bothers you.”

“…If it was you, would you be fine with approaching someone with a hidden agenda?” Leo asked. “For example, can you pretend to like someone to gain information from them?”

“Hmn,” Takumi frowned, “Realistically, I don’t think I would be able to do much, even if I force myself into it. I don’t have the skills or the mindset.”

“Exactly, you live true to your feelings. That’s the way you are,” Leo said. “I… well, sometimes I feel as if I can manipulate my own feelings. It makes me think that if I try, I can even deceive myself into liking someone, which is even worse than faking affection. It’s not something to be happy about.” The words were grave, but Leo just shrugged as he spoke. “You know, after we met Anthony, I have thought of asking you to befriend him, since you are good with children. These decades of disconnection have created many language differences between us and Valla. We also don’t understand the tone of their culture; Corrin and Azura have been having a hard time learning them. If you join in, maybe you could help them and, ahm, check if our suspicion about that child can be erased… But then I figured you wouldn’t like that. Before you can trust someone, you would rather stay far away from them, am I right?”

“Tr-true, but…” Hearing Leo said this made Takumi thought that he should try a little bit. Maybe it would help him in general. He should fix his tendency to make his relationship with everyone so difficult, for example. He said as much, although not eloquently.

“Experiment then,” Leo smiled, neither supporting or discouraging him. “Just be a bit protective of your own boundaries.”

It was strangely comforting to hear that. “What does dark magic make you think about life and death?” Takumi asked, thinking back to Nyx’s words.

Leo looked at him and blinked. “It’s not exactly dark magic that makes me think…” He stopped mid-sentence, thought for a long while, then started again with a question of his own: “Say, do you feel any special energy when you use Fujin Yumi? Something that outright indicate its legendary power?

“Uhm, not really? I have shown it to you before, you would have known if there was something, right?”

“I don’t know, you are its owner, it could be different.”

“No, I don’t think there is something that can be described as magical ‘feeling’. It shoots very well in my hand, better than I can imagine about any type of bow, and the damage is much greater. Those are the closest things to magic I can say about it. Of course, there’s the part that I must focus to call up the string and the arrow, but…”

“There’s no feeling? No power surge?” Leo asked. “Do you know if it’s the same with your brother’s sword?”

“Maybe? I have never heard of him saying anything about that.”

“I see. I have talked to Xander about this before. Siegfried and Brynhildr are the same. In our hands, they feel pretty dead. And that’s striking, considering that one of them is a magic tome. Like you, we only need to call up their power with our will and an great attack would happen. As the wielders, we don’t feel power channeling through or anything, we only see the blow coming off and crushing our opponents.”

“That used to make me feel… very unbalanced,” Leo said. “When you strike someone with your sword, you feel, uhm, resistance from their bones and flesh, right? And there is some strain on your body too.” He struggled a bit with the words. “It signals something about the damage you are exerting. Yet with our weapons, the power increase, but the signals don’t change much compared to weaker ones.”

“Dark magic is stronger than any other type of magic. It is also the most complex one in term of potential. Its history is littered with cautionary tales. Then comes Brynhildr. The overwhelming power that it puts at my finger… I can’t even begin to describe.” A dark shadow crossed Leo’s face. “It makes everything so easy for the body and the mind. Now murder can be done with a forgettable thought; I’m often afraid that one day I will fail to check myself before attacking. Sometimes, when I cast the spell, I feel as if the illusion of the growing tree is mocking me. It paints the image of life while serving as an instrument of violence.”

Takumi didn’t know what to say. In his mind, the pieces felt into place.

He recalled the words of the Rainbow Sage. Their legendary weapons were not born to inspire goodness. Their strengths have been the causes of too many wars, and to this day raw violence was still the only reason they were passed down through the royal bloodlines of the two kingdoms. In Hoshido, Takumi had seldom had to doubt that he was on the right side of history, but Leo didn’t have that luxury. He and his siblings had been going against fellow Nohrians for many years, all the way until just before they jumped into the chasm. Internal conflicts had casted a long and heavy shadow on all of their lives. For Leo, Nyx’s words must have hit close to home. The fear of doing the wrong thing was very real to him.

“When I was a kid, I chose to pursue magic just to escape my siblings’ shadows.” Leo started to bite his lower lip. “Everything was so simple and childish. Then one day, I was told that I could inherit Brynhildr. They placed the tome in my hand and told me to be proud. I have never regretted carrying it, Takumi, but I can’t approve of being proud of something like this.”

Takumi thought of how Leo and his siblinds had to fear for their lives in their own kingdom, how they had to pretend to obey Garon’s insane orders while plotting to save the innocence with what few resources they had. _Listen to him._ A startling idea crossed his mind as he stared at Leo. _He is born an idealist._

 _That is why he finds so much conflict within himself. He still believes in a beautiful future for Nohr and he is trying to build it, every single day._ Leo’s difference from Corrin was that life had repeatedly tried to disappoint him, so now he hid his fire under a protective layer of pragmatism and tried to ride out the stormy time. Thinking back, his oddly specific advices for Takumi during the scouting trip became clear. _If you want to dream, are you prepared to keep it alive?_

Before he knew it, Takumi had reached out closed his hand around his friend’s. Leo might have said that Takumi lived true to himself, but that didn’t mean that Takumi knew his own feelings very well. Until now, most of them had been messy and jumbled up, making Takumi instinctively want to deny their existence. If not for meeting someone so open to him as Leo, he would probably refuse to deal with them forever.

Leo raised his eyebrows at Takumi, then smiled lightly. A soft glow seemed to bloom around him. He turned the palm so that a couple of his fingers stayed in Takumi’s loose grip, and they strolled on under the cool shadow of the woods, arms swinging together as if to chase away the negativity.

Not long after, they spotted two figures walking side by side in the forest, far enough from where they were standing that the faces were unclear. From the attire, however, it was easy to guess that the pair was Prince Xander and Princess Camilla. Leo halted and watched, looking as if he had an irresistible urge to come to them but his legs wouldn’t budge.

Takumi waited.

“How do you look after your brother?” Leo asked at last.

“…Ryoma doesn’t need to be looked after.”

“That’s exactly how Xander is, yet somehow people still find ways to do it for him. Camilla has been by his side for a long time, I wouldn’t compare myself to her, but what about Nyx? She has only seen him fighting twice.” His friend sighed. “It makes me wonder if I am being blind toward something. And- and it’s not like Camilla doesn’t have her own problems.”

Takumi shook his head. “I’m not saying that you are silly to be concerned, but remember not to worry too much. You are giving me a lot of peer-pressure here, you overdoer.”

“Oh really? I forget,” Leo glanced at Takumi with amusement. That earned him a shove on the shoulder.

“Go to them,” Takumi said, nudging Leo forward. “Come see me later if you want to.” _I will share with you why I became an archer too_ , he thought, stepping away as if already decided to go do something else. Encouraged by this, Leo began to walk toward his brother and sister. After a while, Takumi stopped to look.

_That is our great strategist. Leo, who is my age, who doesn’t enjoy battle tactics all that much, and is afraid of killing._

He wondered why he could understand Leo and just why he cared so much. Maybe it’s because seeing Leo’s way of life had made him more courageous. Maybe because, for the first time, he had tasted the feeling of being so quickly and completely convinced by the force of someone’s character, strengths and flaws included. _Let me watch over you,_ Takumi thought.

Leo probably didn’t need him to do that, but Takumi did.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hinoka is the final POV to be added. I like Camilla too much to be able to write her =))
> 
> When I was writing the middle part of this chapter, Ordinary Love by U2 was a song that often came up in my playlist. The lyrics is strangely fitting, especially a couple of line that goes:  
> “I can't fight you anymore; it's you I'm fighting for.  
> The sea throws rocks together but time, leaves us polished stones.”  
> Every time I heard them my mind just went 'Yassssss, let’s go, boys and girls!' hehe. 
> 
>  
> 
> Only after I have finished writing this chapter did I realized how much Leo was channeling Forrest xD.


	4. Chapter 4

Xander let out a sigh. He was sitting on a step paved with ceramic tiles, one elbow propped on a knee while his chin rested on the palm. He was trying rather hard to think, but to no avail. This, was because he was sitting in the fortress’s hot spring.

His leaning posture had brought the water level all the way to his lower lip. Hot water embraced him, steam raised and drifted among the calming sounds of trickling water. Around the spacious room laid with briliant blue tiles, windows and sky wells were letting in gentle columns of sunlight that painted the clouds in soft gold. Xander’s sigh had held more contentment than frustration, and this fact surprised him. He knew the positive effects of hotsprings on physical health, but had never expected a day when his mind could be distracted from worries by a pleasurable setting.

Retracing the journey thus far, it must be said that they had all landed on a flaming bed of nails, yet instead of feeling crushed by the pressure of the situation, Xander was becoming more optimistic everyday. The alliance had given both teams an unprecedented wealth of diplomatic resource, and everytime he tried to navigate the possible scenarios of the future, there was always a light of faith in him that said: for each obstacle to come, there would be a way that this connection could help. He often wondered if he was being too impulsive in holding hope before their force could even see the light at the end of the tunnel, but no matter how he tried to argue with it, the feeling remained strong and persuasive. Deep inside, Xander knew that he wouldn’t be able to fight against it. As a person, he was changing too.

It was different when one was surrounded by supportive people. Xander was still his cautious self, but before he knew it, somehow he had also found more confidence and ambition. Further still, he felt justified to have these changes. Their unconventional army had brought to him strange and wonderful friendships. In this cohort of people from all walks of life, where even the significance of a crown was diminished, everyone was pressed to face and solve the differences among themselves with honesty. They have quarreled and sometimes clashed to the point of drawing blood, but all had gone toward building a force that was maturing rapidly. Most people, including his own retainers, had become closer to him than they would to a mere general. It was a curious feeling, to be valued for not only what he could do for others, but also for who he was. All at once, it was easier for him to breath, to lead, to dream. The joy and peace almost made him afraid to acknowledge it.

He couldn’t ask for anymore than this. Although he still thought of father and of his own betrayal, the feeling of guilt and being lost had grown lighter as each day passed. Leo had asked him about his feelings when they first came to Valla. He had answered with reluctance then; now he had no doubt that his choice was right. How could he doubt it, when all of his siblings were by his side again, even Corrin and Azura? How could he, when he had found precious friends among former foes? What a great relief it was to be able to throw away prejudices and find the truth of a person’s nature. The moment you could to view someone as friend, a new sky seemed to open up.

When they first crossed blades on the battle field, it had taken Xander only a moment to understand that no one could hold more contempt toward him than the Crown prince of Hoshido. Once he had grown close to Ryoma, he was even surer that this first impression was correct. More than the problem of family bad blood and Nohr’s aggression, it was clear that Ryoma had a powerful moral compass that pointed him to the opposite direction of anything Nohr seemed to represent. Callous. Hateful. Unforgiving. Undeserving. Those were the words prescribed to King Garon’s rule in recent years and, by extension, to the convenient poster child that was Xander. Yet what had Ryoma extended to him other than generosity and now, confidence?  If one believes in the goodness of people before they had tasted the bitterness of life, they would be called naïve, but if they do so in spite of all adversities, they must be called wise.

Finding his thoughts circling back to a usual subject of these days, Xander smiled and shook his head at himself. He left the pool to take a wash in the washing room, and had just finished tucking in his shirt when he heard a distant door being opened. Soon, the door to the changing room opened as well, and a familiar face appeared. Xander had to chuckle at the coincidence.

“Pardon me?” Ryoma blurted out, clearly surprised that he was getting laughed at before they had even greeted each other.

“Please don’t mind me,” Xander quickly replied, flushing a little. “Are you done with training today?”

“I cut it short. Corrin wanted me to help her with some of Leo’s homework so I’m going over the the treehouse after this.”

“She comes to you for that too? You know, she has been asking me questions rather regularly as well. I have to wonder if she seeks help from us just so that we may feel good as big brothers.”  

“Ooh, I’ll have to feign innocence and ask her about that then.” Ryoma smiled. “Are you leaving already?”

“Well…” Xander was torn. He enjoyed talking to Ryoma whenever they crossed path, but this was hardly the venue for that. Then he thought of something. “Shall I wash your back for you?”

Of course Ryoma was delighted. “Give me a moment,” he said and went into a changing stall. Xander took a washcloth from the rack, filled a basin of water and arranged a couple of stools on the floor. When Ryoma emerged, everything was ready.

“Is this a thing in the Nohrian army as well?” Ryoma sat down on one of the stool.

“Indeed it is. People are the same when it come to basic chores, aren’t they?” Xander replied as he walked around and sat. Despite the inconveniences of war, Ryoma’s hair was healthy, growing long and rather freely down his back. Xander experimentaly ran his fingers through a part of them before gathering the hair and putting it around Ryoma’s shoulder.

Then he halted and stared, stunned by the sight.

On Ryoma’s broad back, a large tattoo in black and bright white stood in stark contast to the warm tan of the skin. The expanse of ink went all the way from his waist to his shoulder, depicting an enormous beast ascending from crashing waves to the sky, its claws seemed to be riding on silver clouds. Bold, strong lines made up its long body, the carp tail that it still retained, the perfect scales, its magnificent mane and horns, and most of all, its fearsome head. For all of the elegance that the artist had weaved into each curve and detail, everything was full of wild energy. Behind the dragon, the fantastical landscape of mountain peaks and waterfalls paled in comparison. The transforming creature radiated unstoppable ferociousness and godly dominance; this was not the Dragon of Dawn that was the beginning of Hoshido, this was the Dragon of Hoshido – a holy entity born from the spirit of the people, created solely to represent their ideals for what was strong, right, beautiful, and _Hoshidan_.

The power of the image was so raw. The moment Xander’s mind made the connection between it and the idea of _Ryoma,_ his body shivered. Unconsciously, he raised a finger to gently trace the lines.

To his credit, Ryoma didn’t jump at the sudden contact. His muscles merely twitched, and Xander immediately woke up.

“Sorry, I forgot to tell you about that,” Ryoma said first, although he did not need to apologize. “It is rather unconventional, isn’t it?”

“This is a masterpiece,” Xander took a deep breath and said, unsure of how else he could express his impression.

Ryoma turned around and beamed at him. “Do you know how valuable your compliments are?”

“What do you mean?” Xander blinked. For an instance, he wondered if Ryoma was being sarcastic about his language ability.

“I’m saying that to be praised by you is a great honor. That has nothing to do with what word you choose to use, by the way,” Ryoma said before Xander could reply, as if he could read Xander’s mind. “You give compliments freely and always sincerely. Anyone would be proud to receive them.”

“…You exaggerate,” Xander protested, feeling warm inside.

“I think the receiver has more authority to judge than the giver, so just accept it,” Ryoma grinned.

Xander huffed out a laugh, “You especially chose this design then?” He tapped Ryoma’s shoulder so that his friend would turn forward and let him continue his task.

“The theme is common, but I did make a lot of special requests,” Ryoma answered. “The royal ink master and I had a pretty rough start.”

“Let me guess. You argued, then you bonded and became completely smitten with each other?” Xander couldn’t help teasing.

“Tsk tsk, I’ll have to be careful with you from now on. My way to conquer the world shouldn’t be found out this easily.”

“I doubt getting found out can prevent you.” As he wiped the damp cloth across Ryoma’s back, Xander’s eyes couldn’t help but be drawn to the tattoo. The ink seemed to become shinier and more alive as each moment passed. It was absolutely fascinating.

They enjoy a short moment of silence before Ryoma spoke again: “Speaking of dragons, I have a question,” his tone was casual, but there was a hint of seriousness that immediately drew Xander’s attention. “When you met the Rainbow Sage, how did he appear to you?”

“Ah, Corrin did tell me that he had a peculiar way to test you.” Xander pondered then answered: “I think for the large part, my journey was similar to yours, except that the scale of the test was much smaller. I went there alone on my father’s order. It was his condition for me to receive Siegfried.” Suddenly, he frowned “Although, thinking about it, there was something foreboding about that mission.” Xander stayed silent for a while, recalling all the signs he had seen and the words he had exchanged with his father. He continued, “My father said that the sword’s power had started to resist his command some years earlier and he did not have use for it any longer. I wasn’t sure what that meant, but now I think maybe the sword was fighting Anakos’s influence in my father.” He blinked, “At the time, I assumed that he had been upset because of Queen Arete’s passing.”

Ryoma’s head tilted down.

“Anyway, a difference: when I arrived at the Sevenfold Sanctuary, the Rainbow Sage revealed his identity to me right away when we met at the bottom of Mount Sagesse. Not that I believed him,” Xander smiled wryly. “He asked why I came. I said I wanted to be a good leader.”

“He told me that I looked anxious to become one and offered to give me an advice. In his own words: ‘I can already see that you will be good. But then, there’s no telling if you will be successful.’” Xander recounted with perfect memory. He chuckled and shook his head.

“What a scary thing to hear,” Ryoma muttered.

“I battled the illusions just as you did. When I arrived at the top floor, the old man appeared once more. He told me he would warp me directly back to Nohr. I was thankful for that alone; the whole ordeal was exhausting” Xander said in a mocking voice, then sighed. “In his last words to me, he asked how I saw myself as a son. I told him that I would try to be good, but probably would not be successful.”

He squeezed the washcloth over the basin, folded it and placed it over the edge of the container. Then, instead of starting to clean up, he looked back to Ryoma, who had turned around but seemed to have not found a suitable response to his story. Seeing Ryoma’s contemplative expression, he asked: “Did you want to meet him for yourself?”

Ryoma’s eyes flicked to Xander. “That’s a nice way to put it,” he smiled tightly. “Yes, I used to imagine that I would meet him in a different context than when I did with Corrin. I thought I would be the main character, in short. Such ego…”

Xander frowned. “I don’t think you need to be critical of yourself. My motive was not so different from yours. As princes, we have been taught to expect that we would do certain things to prove ourselves.”

“And sometimes we do it just for self-confidence,” Ryoma nodded. “I know, but eventually, one must break away from their mold. Did you think much about the sage’s words afterward?”

“…Not much until recently, I have to say.” Xander answered honestly. “With the way events have been unfolding, it turns out that he and I talked about the two greatest conflicts of my life.”

“And do you agree with what each of you have said?”

It took Xander some time to search for the words. “I think that finding the ultimate answers is less important than just keeping the questions in mind. I doubt that I will ever be able to fully judge these matters. It is the uncertainty that keeps us on our toes, you noticed that, did you not?”

He tried to explain. “I… Today, the leader that I am has a different goal than when I was under my father’s rule. You once told me that my stance seemed to have changed overnight. I guess you have been wondering why I could get things in order so quickly. Leo, Camilla, and I all have personal connections and power – true power that we have been cultivating for when we need to make political moves. This was something that my father encouraged and practically forced the royal children to build. He used the Concubine War to weed out those who was not fast or keen enough. He also gave us difficult missions to remind us who was the one and only ruler. Sometimes, those missions were designed so that we would have to sacrifice something or someone, then we would know that the mission was either a test or a punishment. My goal, well, was to keep people and myself alive and loyal to Nohr in the face of that.”  Xander unconsciously ran a hand through his hair, trying to release tension. Finally stringing the events together had led to conclusions that simply sounded awful, and speaking of this subject has unearthed many other uneasy thoughts in him, all of which were scrambling onto the surface and fighting to be put into words.

He swallowed hard before continuing, averting his eyes to the decorations spreading out on the walls. “Now, my goal clearly has more to do with the Nohr that I want than what my father wants. What makes me good or successful will be measured on different scales altogether. I also do not know if it will morph again in the future, before I am even aware of it. How many things have led to my eventual break form my father’s influence, I cannot tell. Anankos and Corrin are certainly the big reasons, but I know that I wouldn’t have made that decision if the seed of defiance hasn’t sprouted inside me long ago. Nothing is linear; history books do not teach how these kinds of change come to be and I do not know how to fathom it. To be honest, even Leo was surprised when I made this move, and other people probably just keep their questions unvoiced for now. The people of Nohr are strong willed; survival has made them so. My father’s changes have created cracks in society that allow a- a treason such as mine to be sustained, and my siblings and I have always made sure that in extreme situations, each of us would know how to pull through. It’s just that we have always thought that things wouldn’t… actually get extreme, especially in this way.”

Before he could finish the last words, Xander had lowered his head. He felt drained by the confession and shaken by the thought that he had hardly given a real answer after all. In an afterthought, though, he remembered his status and dragged his gaze back to meet Ryoma’s.

There he found a pair of eyes that was clearer and nobler and more grounded than any he had ever seen. They startled him and, in an instant, calmed him down completely. He was reminded of why he kept coming back to talk to Ryoma and why he could entrust Ryoma with his thoughts. The warm encouragement that those eyes sent to him carried neither pressure nor expectation. Their message was strong and simple: _I’m here with you_ . How many people could put themselves as equal to Xander? How many would choose to do it? To arrive at this point, Ryoma had removed layers upon layers of conditioned reactions that his position must have tried to imprint on him. Again, Xander had to wonder _What more could I ask for?_

Emboldened by the impulse of the moment, Xander decided to say the rest of his thoughts before he could curtail himself. “As for being a son… My siblings have taught me something recently, that everyone in the family is irreplaceable. I am the only person who they see as the eldest brother, just like each of them has a unique place in my heart. I used to try to split the role. ‘Let me go out and take care of business, let Camilla look after Leo and Elise’, but I’m afraid that I have made them feel lonely.” Xander shook his head. What was worse was that he had made them think this loneliness was required. They had adjusted their behavior according to his and stopped asking for attention. In the end, he had deprived all of them something they dearly needed. “It also means that my father has a place in my life that I cannot force into a box and discard. For now, I accept that I will not be able to separate all of my feelings toward Garon the father, the teacher, and the King. That I may never know why he could allow the Concubine War. Now that I have learnt what the Duke of Nestra has done, I even wonder if my father has fought and lost to Anankos or actually welcome the dragon into his own mind. Again, I accept the possibility that even if we can bring my father back again, I may still have to ponder these questions forever and alone. I- I think I must acknowledge these possibilities if I want to stop hindering myself with unnecessary concerns.”

The words spilled from him in a rush and without grace. The small spark of confidence had vanished as quickly as it had arrived, and Xander had to take a deep breath at the end. Hot and cold tides washed up from his back to his nape wave after wave, as if he was getting sick. He wasn’t sure whether his face was becoming flushed or pale anymore. His vision swirled a little as he waited for a reaction from Ryoma. For a moment, his stomach sunk with the dread that he had treaded into forbidden water after all.

But then Ryoma smiled at him, the kind of gentle smile that made it look like he was thanking Xander, leaving Xander dazed.

To his stunned expression, Ryoma leaned forward a little and spoke in a soft, happy voice: “This is what I meant when I said that you are sincere, Xander. Don’t take your thoughts lightly. Gods know our kingdoms and our politics have gaping differences between them, but I can talk to you all day about everything.”

“You have no idea how I had longed for someone who would speak about these matters, who wouldn’t shun hard questions.” Ryoma regarded him kindly. “I think it’s because you never stop questioning that you have arrived here, as the hope for Nohr and the pillar of your family. I admire your mental fortitude. I know you don’t think that you have done enough, but do hear me out. You are still struggling to climb up the mountain, your eyes are trained on the summit, so I won’t try to convince you to count how far you have come. I just want to say that as a fellow climber, I see you when I look up along the slope, and that really helps me.”

Xander felt his heart skipped in his chest. Now he was definitely getting red. He was also certain that he would never be able to find a reply to such praises, regardless of what Ryoma say about his ability to think. As he tried to direct the topic away from himself, he noticed the slight furrow that remained between Ryoma’s brows despite the smile. “… Have you been having difficult doubts, Ryoma?” he asked.

It was Ryoma’s turn to look down. Eventually, he nodded. “I… Lately, whenever I think of how you have distanced yourself from your father’s influence and finally forge your own way forward, I find myself coming back to analyze some of the notions that I used to avoid.” When his eyes turned to Xander again, they were filled with something like reluctance. It was a strange light to find in his eyes, Xander thought. “You know that long after I came of age, Queen Mikoto continued to be the ruler of Hoshido,” Ryoma said “What do you think of it?”

Xander blinked, surprised by the question as well as his lack of a suitable answer. He had assumed that Queen Mikoto had the reign because she upheld the magical barrier of Hoshido, but then that was merely an assumption that the Nohrian court had made in hindsight, when they saw that she remained in the highest position year after year. If there was a real reason, they were never sure of it.

Ryoma must have seen through Xander’s confusion, his smile turned dry. “It is odd, isn’t it? Up until her sudden passing, we were still skirting around the matter of setting a plan for me to be crowned. There were many excuses to leave her on the throne for so long, but only as many as the number of reason as to why she shouldn’t have it.”

“From the perspective of my siblings and I, it was because we wanted her to have power. The truth is, the moment I am king, my mother would become a guest in her own home.” Ryoma’s voice was quiet. “Yes, people like and love her, and at least they will respect her because of us, but deep down inside, the most they will give her will be tolerance. The power of both of our kingdoms, yours and mine, has been built upon the idea of aristocracy and bloodline. When my citizens think of their responsibility toward Hoshido, they think they need to support a person with those qualities. Each of them may praise Queen Mikoto as virtuous, but none will argue that she is fit to stand shoulder to shoulder with other kings and queens, who have history and station. She is also too kind and generous. I understood when you said that you needed to build your own power. It really matters if you are to be a leader. All these years, Queen Mikoto has not established power for herself. If not for the magic shield and the tragic circumstance of her death, I am afraid that her name would barely be passed down in our history. Her records would merely be that of a second queen that has served her family and Hoshido well. They may even leave her unnamed, unequal as she is compared to Queen Ikona.”

Xander closed his eyes for a moment; he could relate in a painful way. He had once had many siblings, some were late-bloomers but some were brilliant for the short years they had; yet what record remained of them all, now that they had perished? He and Camilla were probably the only people who had really lived and survived the bloodbath, maybe they were also the only ones who still remembered. Out there, the names of their lost siblings had long been swallowed up in the fast pace of the power race. Constructing history was yet another tool for some people to erase others.

“We couldn’t stand to see that,” Ryoma continued. “My ailing mother Ikona was the one who first placed Mikoto on the ruling seat; the kingdom thought that it was only temporary. Afterward, Yukimura, Hinoka, and I fought very hard to make sure that Mikoto would stay. We actively targeted the oppositions, rallied our allies, even pushed Mikoto herself to make moves that would secure her position. It was not an ugly time but it was definitely forceful. From year to year, the matter became settled, and we congratulated ourselves for having done our best for her and Hoshido. Yet now I wonder if we did not know her after all, if we had made choices for her that went against her happiness. Maybe we were so dependent on her for emotional support that we have bound her into our selfish and narrow view. Maybe she would have preferred to live in seclusion, away from the prying eyes and the gossips. She didn’t care to be queen anyway.”

Ryoma suddenly huffed out a laugh, mocking himself. “It’s like how I am so oblivious when it comes to Sakura. Shy as she is, she knows her own mind. You probably understand that better than I do. I know you have been taking care of her, just like how you watch over Azura.”

“I have a different vantage point,” Xander gently said.

“Hmn,” Ryoma merely smiled at that.

“I don’t doubt that Mikoto loved us as her own children,” Ryoma said after a moment, “But her feeling of duty to us might have been the only thing that kept her in court. On top of her sorrows when my father passed, I think Corrin was a wound that could not heal. She probably would have stolen away to infiltrate Nohr by herself if not for the responsibilities that chained her down. Of course, we would beg her to never do that and she would stay because of us, but at least instead of using her magical shield to reaffirm her position, we should have developed an alternative shield and let her have more freedom.”

“Sometimes, to be busy with something meaningful is a medicine,” Xander tried to suggest.

Ryoma nodded reluctantly. “In the end, it all comes back to what I can’t ask her anymore. I still remember when you and I first talked about our siblings, we said we wanted our loved ones to find peace of mind.” He tucked Xander’s sleeve; they both stood up. “Peace that we cannot decide for them. Now that I’m left behind, I can only guess what my parents truly wanted. My father and my two mothers… I have received everything from them, but I wish I had time to grow up and become their friend.”

The tinge of regret in Ryoma’s voice was light as a feather, and his expression was as mild as before. Xander was startled to find that where he should feel the sharp burn of guilt, there was only sympathy for Ryoma and himself. Today, theirs were not stories about Nohr and Hoshido, only about sons and parents. Aching, hopeless stories. Neither of them had the answers to the myriad of questions that they faced, only the mind to listen and help each other push his own boundaries. _Irreplaceable_ , Xander thought of the word again.

That was why he lightly shook his head and chuckled when he heard the next words from Ryoma. “Between you and I, we shouldn’t need to be so formal with the thanks and the apologies anymore,” Ryoma said. “But thank you nevertheless, Xander. You never reject my inquiries.”

“Indeed, you shouldn’t thank me. You never reject my answers,” Xander replied. “Please know that I can talk to you all day about everything too, Ryoma,” he added, delighted by the light of joy in Ryoma’s eyes.

From that day on, from time to time, Xander’s mind would come back to the image of the transforming dragon on Ryoma’s back. He thought of the Ryoma who considered becoming a dragon more meaningful than simply being one; the Ryoma who always strived to be better, to ascend higher, to break through to the next stage.

 _I hope he knows who I see when I look up the mountain,_ he thought.

 

\------

\------

 

When the four of them engaged, the obstacle course looked like a whole battlefield itself.

Leo had never understood what it meant to feel battle-crazed. He doubted that he would ever know it and didn’t want to anyway - to lose oneself to the fight sounded like the most terrible thing that could happen to him. However, he did wonder if such stage of mental-focus could help him forget the annoying distractions that surrounded him. Dust, leaves, heat, sweats seemed to attack him in copious amount from the most unexpected places and enter even more unexpected ones. They slapped into his eyes, went up his nostrils, made false sounds in his head, sometimes even left him momentarily mute and deaf. They definitely got in his way whenever he attempted to think about strategy on-field.

In short, although Leo was a damn fine battle sorcerer, he would never wear the brilliant expressions that he was seeing on the faces of Princess Hinoka and Takumi at that moment, through the dust veil. Their cheeks were flushed bright, their eyes sparkled, and while Princess Hinoka’s shouts rang in the air like copper bells, Takumi wore a slight smirk on his lips as if he was a hunter browsing the preys. It was just a slight upturn at the corner of the mouth, but his whole face seemed to light up with confidence and what could be called an adorable amount of stubbornness. The pair of brother and sister were absolutely in their element.

For all of the disadvantages of being highly expose while on air, Princess Hinoka had no trouble dodging attacks or making offences. Her lance danced like splashing sunlight, covering an enormous sphere of dominance for her. Coupled with the nimble movements of the battle pegasus, she more than filled the role of both observer and lead attacker. Takumi was no lesser, moving like a silver shadow and firing off arrows from the most difficult angles. This was not to say that Leo had no criticism to make or improvement to suggest to them, however. Although their offences looked torrentous and he and Xander seemed to be mostly on the defense, it was clear that a swift victory was not happening for the Hoshidan duo. Considering that speed was the most vital part of their fighting style, this was a great fault.

Leo had just warded off an attack from Hinoka when he noticed the true purpose of her offence. She rose quickly into the air, revealing Takumi who had moved into an angle previously blocked by her presence. Three successive lines of light fired from his fingers.

Leo simply waited.

True to his expectation, Xander’s blocking blow swept by his side, readily neutralized Takumi’s arrows. As the crimson bolt of magic shot by him, Leo felt as if the ominous power had sucked life itself from the space around it, leaving him breathless for a split second. He had heard of victims of the sword who became traumatized by this fleeting sensation, but for him it was the most reassuring feeling in the world.

Across the field, Takumi’s face showed a flick of disappointment. As he moved to make another rapid attack, Leo shook his head sharply, showing his distrust toward the effectiveness of such a plan. Takumi seemed to catch this and hesitated.

“Pew pew pew peeeew! Let’s go Takumiii!” Elise cheered from afar.

“Why are you for him, sister!” Leo shouted.

“Superior brother is superior. Admit defeat, Leo.” Takumi shouted back.

“Oh yeah? Make me!” Leo replied. “Let’s go~ Takumi~!” he mocked, raising a round of laughter from around the ground. Even Hinoka played along. “Go Takumi! Go! Go! Go!” she added in a sing-song voice.

“Don’t embarrass Sakura!” Elise continued. Even heartier laughters broke out, among which Leo could distinctly recognize the voice of Camilla and the boisterous one of Prince Ryoma. Like a chain reaction, these words and sounds made Takumi’s face crunched up so miserably that Leo himself started to shake with snickers. “I’m sorry! Break time!” He cried and pulled back to the end of the practice ground, all the while laughing until his chest hurt.

“Oy! Stop that right now!” Takumi ran over to punch him on the hip.

“Ouch. Sorry, sorry.” Leo used his hand to shield, then patted his heaving chest. After a moment, he looked down at his glaring friend and tried to stop himself from laughing again. “Okay, no more joking. Let me return.”

As they moved back to the center of the ground, Xander came to them and said: “Prince Takumi, I’m afraid that your fighting style and Princess Hinoka’s do not make the best pairing for either of you.

Hearing that, Princess Hinoka sighed. “It’s me, isn’t it? I’m too unpredictable; Prince Leo has told me before.”

Takumi was surprised. “Really? I thought we were doing fine.”

“Together, you are above average because individually you are already very good, you two also have much experience fighting as a pair,” Leo replied. “The problem is that you are still holding each other back. Both of you are fierce attacker and both relies heavily on intuition, so the division of your roles are unclear. You always look to the other person for cue before you act, that slows down your judgment and reflex.”

“Say, Leo,” Xander said. “Why don’t you change place with Princess Hinoka? Let’s give that a try.”

Leo froze up. Takumi made a small groan.

Meanwhile, Princess Hinoka happily agreed to the suggestion. “You and I haven’t practiced together much, but I would love to see how a pair like ours turn out.”

Leo felt the want to protest, but rationally knew that he couldn’t. Hinoka’s style will fit with Xander’s very well. He dragged himself to go with Takumi to the other side of the field.

“Stop with that sour face, will you?” Takumi said next to him. We can’t be that bad of a pair.”

“I know we will be good,” Leo replied, trying to gather back his wit. “I just really don’t like facing off my brother. I get nervous.”

“Well, how do you think I felt facing him? And do you know how infuriating it was to see you being so smug because he covers every single corner for you?”

“I wasn’t smug!” Leo immediately countered, although he didn’t deny that Xander covered _a lot._ Thus he and Takumi started a passionate argument in whispers about this one topic that no outsider could ever understood, until a melodious voice called out to him.

“Leo. Leo, dear.” The voice sounded too close to be coming from outside the field.

It was Takumi’s turn to freeze. Very slowly, he turned to their left. “H-hi, Princess Camilla.”

It was indeed Camilla who was walking toward them, with her obedient wyvern by her side. “I know you are excited to begin your partnership, Prince Takumi,” she said sweetly, “But I am afraid that I have to take Leo away from you. Leo, come and help Prince Ryoma, will you? He has some questions that I think you have better answers for than I do.” She winked, and Leo raised his eyebrows.

Before Leo left, Takumi grabbed his shoulder and quickly whispered to him: “Don’t let Ryoma come in unless he is replacing me.”

Leo looked back. “Not even if he partners up with you?”

“I don’t need that much performance pressure right now.” Takumi quickly shook his head. "Let me try my best with Princess Camilla first.”

“You are not focusing of just surviving being near her anymore, huh?” Leo teased.

“Shush, leave.” Takumi shove him away.

Leo’s grin stayed all the way until he reached the edge of the obstacle course, where Ryoma and Azura were standing together, a little apart from Elise. Their heads were side by side and their eyes were directing at a large binder of paper that Ryoma was supporting with one arm.

“There you are, Prince Leo,” Prince Ryoma greeted him. “Princess Camilla told me that it would be more ‘fun’ if you look at this instead of her.” He spoke with a questioning tone.

“I have no idea what she means.” Leo received the binder and briefly looked at the first pages. There was a number of short newspaper articles, all untitled and included in the Opinion section.

He looked up again when Prince Ryoma begun to explain: “Ever since we turned our attention to Lady Varenil, our agents have been working with Nohrian intelligence to find out what we can about her. We have just received a big report this morning. Did you know that she spent more than five years in Nohr?”

Leo’s eyes widened. “She- Not at all!” He was astonished. “Did she do that in secret?” If a noble from Nestra came to Nohr, he would have known.

Prince Ryoma nodded. “It is still unclear how she did it, but from what we pieced together, about eight years ago, she announced to the Nestrian high society that she was starting a period of seclusion to study a few subjects in art. Six years later, she returned to high acclaims when she received esteemed guests in her drawing room to show them the fruits of her study. Words have it that she ‘discovered’ a few artists. Those artists had died in shame and poverty, but Lady Varenil, with her ‘enlightened’ mind, had found their works and presented the values of these items to her guests in such eloquent and erudite way that ‘one could refuse neither the glory they deserve nor the praises that the Patrician was entitled to’.”

As Leo raised his eyebrows at these words, Prince Ryoma grinned. “Yet it turned out that the Patrician was hardly secluded in her study. In fact, she had travelled to Nohr, where she lived as the distant cousin of a young professor in History of Arts at the national university.”

“Wait…” Leo unconsciously said as his mind chased after the story. _A discreet time abroad. An inconspicuous cover…_ He quickly flipped through a few more pages in the binder and saw that they were also filled with newspaper writings, some were starting to get longer and go into trickier subjects compared to the ‘community opinions’ that were written in the beginning. “Did she come to learn about politics?”

“Maybe?” Azura answered him. “It seems that the network of connection that she developed from her ‘cousin’ contact point grew to contain only one part about art and nine parts about society, military, and politics. Camilla said that Lady Varenil must have been extremely shrewd and well prepared, since she was able to learn what she wanted without drawing attention from the Nohrian high society.”

“It helped that she started from the university,” Leo said. “Few courtiers nowadays truly appreciate that environment. The direction that Nohr has taken in recent decades has severely curtailed the university’s ability to influence our kingdom. Still, it remains a brewing pot for big thoughts and opinions.” He browsed a few more pages in the binder. “Were these articles all written by her?”

“Yes. She started from the university press, then appeared in many other periodicals,” Prince Ryoma replied.

“She was quite prolific,” Leo said as he found more and more writings. The dates suggested that the lady was producing at least a couple of column every week by her second year. The topics varied, the pen names varied even more. Leo was about to voice his praises for the agents who had traced down all of these writings when one pen name stood out to him.

“Veril, that’s her?!” He exclaimed and quickly turned more pages. “Veril was one of her names?”

“Ah, that one is famous. We have heard of it in Hoshido too,” Prince Ryoma said. “I remember that a few years ago, our agents sent back a series of article by this author.”

“The series was by Veril and another author,” Azura corrected. “They argued back and forth for months, pulling each other from one topic to another. People talked so much about this exchange that it was given a nickname.”

“The Winter Conversation, I know,” Leo said as he continued to search the binder. “No wonder Camilla thought of this as funny,” he muttered, his finger finally stopped at the page he was looking for. He stared long and hard at it, trying to sort the new information into place. It made him frown, then laugh lightly, then grimace again.

“Leo?” Azura asked.

Leo didn’t answer right away. Then, without explaining the reason for his lapse of silence or his strange reactions, he gave the binder back to Ryoma and Azura. It was opened to the first article of the series.

“It was us that she was arguing with here. This pen name ‘Marx’ is ours,” he simply said.

Four eyes stared at him for a moment. “Yours? You?” Azura asked. “More than one of you?”

Prince Ryoma blinked then laughed, shaking his head. “Of course you guys would write for newspapers. Of course.”

Leo’s face heated up a little from both shyness and pride. “It started when I was rather young, so I didn’t get involved with the beginning of it. I think it was mostly Camilla who wrote the commentaries and opinions for the papers; Xander helped when she wanted him to. It was enjoyable for her and has proven to be useful in a few occasions; she got to build some good relationships too. It wasn’t until about three years ago that I joined. By that time, Camilla and Xander had gotten much busier than before; I became the main writer, writing for myself and sometimes for them.”

As Prince Ryoma and Azura looked down at the page, Leo answered the inevitable question before it needed to be asked: “So yes, it could be said that it was mainly me who was arguing with Lady Varenil. But that’s not the most important part. Look here first,” he pointed at a paragraph in the article by ‘Veril’ that started the series. “Read from this part.”

In the next minutes, Leo watched as the pair read on and disbelief became more and more apparent on their faces. Azura exclaimed softly several times.

“Well!” Prince Ryoma said. “A critical analysis of whether Nohr really needed to continue a close diplomatic tie with Nestra, with an answer leaning toward ‘no’. I must say…!”

“What could be her purposes? Was she testing the reaction from Nohrians?” Azura asked.

Leo shrugged and laughed, “That is a big possibility. I’m as befuddled as you are right now. I can only say that I didn’t suspect any scheme like that three years ago.” He turned the page so that Azura could see the response article by ‘Marx’. “I wrote an honest article to counter her points. That was how it all started”

“You two had a lot to say to each other,” Azura said as she scanned through later articles in the series.

“Yes, it was long. The series got its name because the exchange went on for almost all of winter. The Nohrian one.” _Which was nearly five months_. “There is not much for society to talk about at that time of the year, so a heated debate on the papers might as well served as the best gossip topic in town.”

“In that case, did you worry that someone could find out your identity?” Prince Ryoma asked.

“No, we were always careful. But, speaking of that,” Leo considered the matter for a moment. “Lady Varenil must have been very careful too, didn’t she? I don’t know about her other articles, but the ones she wrote under ‘Veril’ were sophisticated, they told a lot about her level of education. I had to ask for advices from Xander and Camilla quite often when I wrote the responses. I think I can also remember some topics that we touched upon and ‘Veril’ dropped for no clear reason, maybe she did not want to reveal more about herself by answering them.”

“I’m sure that she realized your level of education too,” Azura smiled. “Regardless of whether you could agree on things or not, you must have shared some common grounds to be able to talk about so many different topics. I can see a lot of geopolitics and ethnic history here. Those are not issues that you can easily find a conversation partner for, right?”

“Hmn, then I wonder how much her time in Nohr was related to her political group.” Leo folded his arms in front of his chest. “Is it possible that they were concerned about the Duke’s bias toward Nohr and thus decided to send her here? Three years ago seemed like a good time to put out a test article if spying and learning were her purposes.”

Prince Ryoma huffed out a laugh. “That is a good guess, but let me tell you another thing. The Duke helped Lady Varenil make this trip.”

“Huh?” Leo looked at him with wide eyes.

“She did not have to hide from him at all. He was a participant in the plan. At least, we have the evidence that he was the one who actually discovered those poor artists and ensured that Varenil’s return was a smooth as possible.” Prince Ryoma smirked with dry amusement. “As to how much arrangement he made for her in Nohr and how much he was involved in her activities there, we can only presume.”

“How perplexing,” Leo frowned.

“Maybe an estrangement has happened in the past two years?” Azura remarked.

“It is a possibility, but I also have another speculation,” Prince Ryoma said. “Maybe we are wrong to take the words of Lady Varenil’s group at face value. They might not oppose the Duke as much as they claimed to do. Both the Duke and the Lady have shown to be artful politicians, even though at least one of them seems a bit insane. I would not be surprised if it turns out that the Lady’s escape to Hoshido is actually a part the Duke’s backup plan. If his pact with Nohr fall through, these people would turn to Hoshido for help, for example.”

This idea brought about another lapse of silence among the three of them. After a while, Leo sighed and asked Prince Ryoma: “You have not made direct contact with Lady Varenil, have you?”

“I have not,” the prince confirmed. “Since her arrival at Castle Shirasagi, all of her wishes have been received by Yukimura. The Duke is the only person with whom Xander and I have been dealing in person.”

“So the Duke knows that the Crown Princes of Nohr and Hoshido are working together, but the Patrician does not?”

“Now that you mention it, that is right. Yukimura would not tell the Patrician anything without my direction. She can only know that we are not actively fighting.”

 _She also has no idea about how we are fixing the situation with Cheve,_ Leo thought. _This is good._ “Hmn… If you plan to deal a blow to take the upper hand any time soon, I have a proposal,” he said. “In case you don’t want to reveal the depth of our alliance to her yet, you can tell her that ‘Marx’ is working for you instead.”

Prince Ryoma’s eyes brightened up. “Good idea. I can make him my expert on Nohr and tell the Patrician that I know her to be an author in the Winter Conversation. She will understand that I am paying a lot of attention to Nohr and that I have investigated her.”

“You can also ask her to clarify her earlier view on the relationship between Nohr and Nestra,” Leo added. He grinned broadly when Prince Ryoma enthusiastically patted his shoulder in compliment.

“My head is hurting.” Azura looked at them and stuck out her tongue. “I should think twice about staying in Valla after this war. The life of a royal leech sounds so much better, and I’ve got the experience for the job.”

Prince Ryoma laughed. “Don’t worry. I have survived more than two decades without much sensitivity to these kinds of ploy, you know. Before I met our dear Nohrian friends, I was a simpleton in politics too. You have the best teachers here, Azura.”

Leo stuck his tongue out as well. “That is right, come and let me corrupt your innocent heart, sister.”

“Oh, gladly,” Azura said. “Leo, you should go back to the tree house with me. Analyze Lady Varenil’s articles for Corrin and I.”

“There you go, lesson from the Nohrian expert of my own court. It cannot go wrong,” Prince Ryoma said. Then, as if the thought just suddenly occurred to him, he asked: “Is there a reason for that name, by the way?”

“I’m sorry?” Leo looked at him.

“Did you three choose ‘Marx’ for any particular reason, I mean.”

The random question startled Leo for a moment. “Ah, that. It’s just a common name,” he answered without much thought, then remembered the other reason, the _actual one_. It made him flush in record time. “Uh, well, there’s a different r-reason.” He sputtered, thought about it, and sputtered even more. “It’s silly. Actually, not that silly. Just… Don’t laugh. It’s not bad, just t-trivial.

Of course this speech drove Azura and Prince Ryoma’s curiosity to the highest level, Leo cursed himself. He looked at their eager expression, swallowed, then answered after some reluctance: “Marx is the collective name of our two honeyberry bushes.”

“You name your berry shrubs?” Prince Ryoma looked completely taken aback. His expression made Azura burst out giggling.

“Those two are special!” Leo blushed. “Xander brought it home from far away as a gift for us. He had to baby them like he would infants.”

“It’s all right. I’m not judging or anything.” Prince Ryoma waved both of his hands in defense. “It’s just- That’s very cute.”

Leo almost pouted. They wouldn’t be able to understand, would they, the feeling when you were six year-old and your brother who had been gone for half a year came back with a hand-picked present – living things that promised lovely fragrant fruits. “They are really dear to us. We had to take care of them in secret, you know. We were supposed to hate each other at the time, all according to the wish of some selfish adults.”

“Ah...” Prince Ryoma’s face softened.

“We named them Marx in hope that they would grow strong together,” he said. “Honeyberry needs two shrubs in order to fruit, so both of the bushes needed to survive. We only had one chance.”

“Hehe, I think I actually knew ‘Marx’ in a way,” Azura said, eyes gleamed with laughter. “I remember receiving an ugly but well wrapped box once, the inside was filled with these strangely shaped berries and a note crawled in pencil. It said something like “Marx fruited!!!”, I think. Just very odd.”

“You knew better than eating them, I hope?” Leo asked to quickly push the story forward, hoping that she wouldn’t ask if he knew the author of the note (he did).

“Of course I ate them,” Azura said, giggling even more. “Lecture me about assassination plots all you like, what kid could resist such a curiosity? It’s not like the box was pretending to look nonsuspicious either, so it must have been genuine. And in the end I never cared if it was poisonous; I tried but a few fruits, they were-”

“Very sour,” Leo said in unison with her. He sighed, “I know. It took us a few years to get to the point when we weren’t just wasting a ton of sugar in making those berries into jam.” Unfortunately, by then, Azura had already been taken to Hoshido, and they were not allowed to associate with Corrin yet. It was a disquiet time for the elder siblings.

“I look forward to tasting the sweet ones,” Azura smiled at him.

The warmth of her gentleness made Leo’s heart swell. “I can’t wait to have you try them,” he said.

He waited at the edge of the obstacle course until the fighting pairs stopped for another short break. As he caught Takumi’s eyes, Leo pointed at himself, then at Azura and the tree house to indicate his plan. Takumi nodded in understanding.

While Azura made a promise to play with Elise after dinner, Leo promised to Prince Ryoma that he would be informed if they make any new findings about Lady Varenil from the binder. Then he and Azura walked away from the training area, side by side and with little springs in their steps. Unconsciously, they started humming with no pattern, badly and in discordant tunes. When they finally realized this, they bursted out laughing together.

“I’m glad that we are getting along so well,” Azura said as she wiped a single tear from the corner of her eye.

“I know,” Leo agreed. “We have succeeded beyond expectation, haven’t we? Especially considering that some of us are not exactly the sociable sort. Namely me.”

Azura laughed again. “Get in line, kid,” she said. “You are a hundred years too early to claim my level of unsociability.”

“Aye, but I’m much more annoying than you,” Leo retorted.

“Pfff,” Azura made a mocking sound. She smiled. “Yet it turned out that there are people who would make friend with ‘our sort’ huh?”

Leo took her hand and linked her arm around his. “Takumi keeps marveling to me about how close you are to Corrin.”

“He has the nerve to say that when he and you stick together like glue?” Azura asked, then snickered when Leo sent her a sideway glance. “I don’t know either, Leo. I often question it too,” she said softly. “Without realizing it, somehow I have come to seek her attention while still avoiding others’.”

Her remark made Leo pause in his thought a little. “I understand what you mean,” he said. _Exactly what you mean._

“It’s all the more surprising because our relationship has turned out quite unlike what I’ve imagined. I’ve always longed to meet Corrin, and although I have drawn up a hundred different scenarios for her and for us, none was remotely close to the reality.”

Leo turned to look at her. “You must have heard a lot about Corrin from the Hoshidan court.”

“You mean to say that those stories caused me to want to meet her?” Azura asked. “Hmn, it’s part of the reason, but not the main one. You see… I could tell that Queen Mikoto was from Valla. I kept my distance from her, but I could recognize similarities between her pattern of speech and my mother’s. There were many many other small details too…”

The revelation made Leo’s heart leap in his chest. He had not thought about this.

“I can guess what you are thinking,” Azura glanced at him and smiled ruefully. “If the queen had suspected anything about me all those years, she didn’t let it show either. She had a pure heart, but also a very secretive one.”

“The string that ties Corrin and I was fated but fragile. Although I wanted to see her, I had a lot of doubt about our encounter,” she continued. “When it finally happened, it turned out that destiny didn’t spare me time to think. I plunged deep into her pool. In no time at all, I have opened myself to her in every way; the notion scared me a lot. At first, I could not understand why I was doing that, I told myself to fix my behavior. But whenever I thought of anything, I kept wanting to run to her. Before I knew it, she has held in her hand all of my dreams.”

Absentmindedly, she patted Leo’s arm and smiled faintly. “I used to think that I am indifferent toward most things in life, I was stunned by how much I am invested in her compared to other people. It is a great unfairness, and also a great revelation about myself.”

Leo chuckled upon hearing those words. He wished he could describe to her how much they resonated with him.  “I am just an outsider, but I have an inkling that when Corrin heard of your dreams, she probably started planning to build them,” he said.

“She did, with eagerness,” Azura laughed lightly. “And please don’t say that you are an outsider. I’m afraid that I’m rather set in my aloof way, but I would be very lonely without all of you. I need both of my families, I know that now.”

“Of course you need all of us, we give you tough homework, then we make you beg us to solve them for you…” Leo grinned.

“Thorough exploitation, how very royal,” Azura countered. “Very well, just so that you would go easier on me, I will resort to bribery.  Let me sell my own family out to you by saying that you have no reason to be shy about naming the berry shrubs. When Hinoka and I were young, we made pets out of the patches of moss in our garden. Oh we had names and family trees and star-crossed lovers…”

Leo laughed so hard he could not hear the end of that sentence.

 

\-----

\-----

 

By the time they were a mere fortnight away from Gyges’s territory, the army had settled into a strange kind of atmosphere that only ever appeared in wars – an eerie sense of anticipation mixed with avoidance of speculation, of edginess struggling against composure. While everyone was training harder than ever, Hinoka had also noticed friendships blossoming faster all around camp, along with a high rate of people adopting surprising pet projects and other personal pursuits. On this train of thought, she never expected that one day she would find her brothers in a literature discussion, yet that was the exact scene that greeted her upon returning to the living room of their quarter.

“What could possibly bring this on?” she asked with a smile. Ryoma and Takumi were sitting across each other at the low table, each in his own armchair and leaning forward to look at a thin book - along with a piece of scrapping paper, on which she could make out a few notes and a couple of diagrams in pencil.

“I am trying to find a way to fully explain the symbolism of this one passage to Leo,” Takumi turned to her and signed, flipping the book’s pages to show her the front cover. “It’s so packed with ideas that I had to rob Ryoma in as well. What could ‘the shadows of withering apricot flowers and the waning moon on the pond’s surface’ possibly mean? Passage of time? Decay? Mirage?”

“Page filler,” Hinoka quickly said, refusing to even look at the title. She laughed at Takumi’s sour expression. “I’m not going to help. Three is a crowd, I will just make you more confused.”

“Right right,” Takumi said. He leaned back into his chair and rolled his eyes to the ceiling. “It’s not like it’s something overly important either. I just feel frustrated when I cannot describe to him my feelings toward something and he cannot describe his. It’s no wonder that I found most Nohrian literature awkward before; my experiences are so steeped in Hoshidan culture, my mind is biased to the point that I could not even figure out the ambience of those works, let alone understand their meanings.”

“That makes sense,” Hinoka said, looking upside down at him from above. “It is indeed something to do with experience. I have seen Sakura and Princess Elise talk about literature before. They are very different from us. They seem to absorb each other’s words right up. The other day, I heard Princess Elise gave the most persuasive description of our royal garden in February to Effie. If I didn’t know her, I would have thought that she had seen it firsthand.”

Across from them, Ryoma nodded. “We adults tend to analyze too much. Our logics make us unable to reach the feelings.”

His words reminded Hinoka sharply of her own problem, one that was suppose to be secondary in their current situation, yet had occupied her mind and heart every single second outside of training and marching. “Tell me what I must do to reach those feelings, Ryoma,” she spoke, more bitterly that she had intended.

Seeing the surprise in her brothers’ eyes, she heaved a sigh and walked around to flop down into the armchair next to Ryoma. “Is there a limit to what we can do to understand someone whose life has been completely unlike ours? Is it just my ignorance? I see you and Prince Xander open up so much to each other,” she turned to look at Takumi, “And I know that soon even old wrinkled books won’t be able to prevent you and Prince Leo from getting your thoughts across. You two are still developing a shared vocabulary, that is all. But Camilla… I don’t know what I ought to do.”

“What do you mean?”

Hinoka dragged her palm across her eyes. How could she begin to explain? “I… I think there’s something that Camilla is convinced will go wrong, not- not necessarily in the war, but _because_ of the war. The way we view people or ourselves, for example. Or what can be conisdered reliable in this chaotic life, that kind of thing. The important thing is, I can tell that she worries a lot. She does it like second instinct but she hides and she denies. I fear that it is unhealthy, but she is so… untouchable whenever I mention it, like she knows that her thoughts would not be welcome.” The words sounded wrong to Hinoka herself. She knew she was still too lost to be able to articulate her logic on this matter. Her spirit deflatted as she saw Ryoma and Takumi glanced at each other, confusion apparent on their faces.

“I’m afraid that I am ignorant of this,” Ryoma said. “I have always seen Princess Camila confident and in control. I have no idea that she has been feeling troubled in the way you speak of.”

“No, you wouldn't be able to tell,” Hinoka muttered. She was fully aware that she was whining to her brothers out of frustration. There was no way she could put into word what she had seen in Camilla - the nebulous signs, the vague indicators that sometimes Camilla’s attitude was just a choice she made to drive herself forward, a frail string of stability that she held onto to survive the disaster. She might act like very few things could prevent her from following her heart, but Hinoka suspected that Camilla's heart was far from being at peace.

Ryoma peered at her face, “Is it so dire?” he asked. “You and her are the tightest‒”

“I know, all is well except for just one thing, that’s why it is worse”, she interrupted him impatiently. “I have no reason to doubt that I am very close to Camilla. I enjoy her company and I believe she does mine; we have little reservation toward each other. I am very happy about it; yet even as I learn more about her, it seems that I cannot fully comprehend how she think and make decisions. It’s such a barrier, my courage is shaken. Maybe we really like each other’s personality, but that is not enough for good compability, is it? Or perhaps it would do us well if I leave the topic alone or be more patient, but then I am often gripped with the fear that one day I would be too late…”

Next to her, Ryoma reached over and patted her knee. She glanced at him. “You really don’t have any suggestion, Ryoma?” She said dejectedly. “You are the best among us.”

“No, you are the best, Hinoka,” Ryoma said with a smile. “I don’t think you know how good you are. This may sound odd, but if there is ever a limit, you are likely to be the first among us to find it. I dare say that you only see so many differences because you are _that_ close to Princess Camilla. Compared to you, we are far behind.”

“That is not helpful, brother.” Hinoka sighed.

Ryoma squeezed her hand. “I am sorry that I cannot advice you on how to help her. Having heard what you said, however, I hope that you can have a little more faith. Remember that both of you have worked for this friendship. From her point of view, there must have been many barriers too; it was not easy for her to reach out to you in the beginning either. Maybe there are lingering doubts that still need to be cleared, maybe she isn’t trying to push you away, but is doing her best to overcome the last distance.”

Hinoka stared down at her hands as she listened. Her brother had a point, but at the same time, she wondered if she could keep calm much longer to follow his advice. She wished she could describe to him how much this was affecting her.

Hinoka knew herself; she was the type who would not and could not give up on anyone she held dear. A few weeks ago, she had vowed to follow this matter to the end, thinking that it was the right thing to do for a friend. By now, however, even her own mind had begun to wonder just how deeply she was involved in this. The more she poured herself into the matter and the more Camilla seemed to welcome her to the whole kingdom except one dark fortress, the more Hinoka felt the axis of her perception realigned. Now, every time Camilla behaved sweetly to her to prevent further inquiry, every time Hinoka had to bite back her own words to stop herself from being pushy, she felt something inside her throbbed and twisted. She could almost hear a part of her silently begging Camilla to confide more in her, to allow her to become something in Camilla’s present and future. She had thought that friendship was about accepting each other, supporting each other and, hopefully, enjoying some fun together when a good occasion arose. She never expected that it would include desperately wanting to pull another person toward herself in this way. It was powerful, and painful.

“Hinoka, would it help if I tell you that should I share my thoughts, they would be the same thing as what Ryoma has just said?” She heard Takumi said.

Hinoka smiled wryly and looked up at her young brother, but then she saw the strange trace of anxiety in his expression. He had leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees, his hands clasped together, his eyes gazed intently at her face.

“I am full of admiration toward your friendship with Princess Camilla. I know I would never be able to have the same thing with her, even if one day I can regard her as a friend,” Takumi said in a low voice. “I- These days, I often wonder why I am so scared of Princess Camilla. Some of it is due to her intensity and over-familiarity, but for a while now, I have known that there is a problem on my part as well. I always feel that Princess Camilla’s love is warm, but her wit is so cool and razor sharp, her action and manner ever since she faced Corrin in battle had shown that. It’s as if whenever she needs to, she can wrap up a part of her and put it squarely aside so that she can focus on just one goal. It seems to be… a rather contradictory way to live. I know it is one way for people to overcome bad memories and negative thinking, but I just can’t imagine the feeling, the thoughts, the path to recovery. I don’t understand anything beyond mere theory, and so I am always wary of her. I do agree with what you said ‒ Princess Camilla has a wall around herself; I can sense it because I have answered with my own wall.”

“That- That is hardly something to fault, Takumi,” Hinoka said softly.

Her brother shook his head. “It’s my fault that I still cannot be more sympathetic of her position, but that’s not my point here. It cannot be taken for granted that just anyone would be able understand her and move her, nor would they try so hard and with so much sensitivity as you do. You must see that. While only you can decide what is to be done, I sincerely wish that you will succeed. You are special to her and your friendship is special to me. Give me an ideal to look up to, please.”

Hinoka melted at those words. She nodded lightly and was glad to see a faint smile appeared on Takumi’s lips.

“Would you like to share your concern with us too, Takumi?” Ryoma asked with a gentle voice. “I think that you had rather harsh words for yourself.”

Takumi did not answer for some time. Finally, he said: “It’s not really a concern. I have been working out something, that’s all. When I think of Princess Camilla, I notice that there is a similarity with how I think of Niles and Nyx, and if I am honest with myself, of mother too. Actually…”

He stopped mid-sentence, then shook his head and looked down. Hinoka felt a strange sense of surprise gripping both herself and Ryoma; neither of them could say a word to break the silence. In the end, Takumi stood up, pulled the tea table toward himself a little, then walked aroud to sit down on the floor in front of Hinoka’s and Ryoma’s armchairs. Leaning back on the edge of the table, he looked up at them. The pure emotion in his eyes made Hinoka’s heart skip a beat; instinctively, she reached out a hand and gently patted her brother’s head.

The usual Takumi would shake away the touch, but this time he stayed, meekly tilting his head a little. He asked in a small voice: “Have you heard about the details of the Concubine War from Princess Camilla or Prince Xander? Did they tell you about the people they liked? Those they pitied? Their own sorrows?”

The mere mention of the topic made Hinoka’s stomach churn. She glanced at Ryoma to find his eyes darken.

Their expressions told it all. Takumi cried out softly: “I can’t understand how they could live through it! I… When Leo spoke of it, he had this calm, analytical look on his face, a-and he made the entire conversation out of consideration for me. He retold that that war like a historian, then even explained the emotions that he experienced and how he resolved them, for the sake of my understanding! It was too much even for dissociation. My mind could see the reason of it, but my heart could not cope, it was distressed. It took me days to be able to let Leo tell his own story in full. If I may make a bad analogy to your point, Hinoka, it was like Leo reached out but I could not receive him in whole. That’s how much distance we still have on that front.” He let out a hollow laugh.

Hinoka frowned; Takumi quickly grabbed her hand to stop her from trying to soothe him. “The thing is, I remember how I used to think that mother had too much false cheer or that Niles had nothing other than apathy. I knew I was wrong and should be sympathetic to the way they choose to heal, no matter how imperfect it looked, yet I could not chase my judgmental thoughts away completely. I wonder if it was because after I learnt of what happened to father and Corrin, all I knew was to name my chaotic feelings as anger and resentment. With time, I fed into those notion, I gave them a permanent place in me instead of freeing myself from them. Perhaps that is why when I see others around me rise above the adversity, battered but victorious nonetheless, I still feel like a pathetic child. You are so much better, Hinoka.”

“You are still very young.” Ryoma took Takumi’s hand into both of his.

Takumi did not look consoled, but the intention seemed to help him calm down. “Now that I truly look back, I think I had too many overwhelming feelings, to the point that I wished someone would tell me how to feel so that I could rest my mind. Yet I also thought that no one had that right, I wouldn’t have forgiven anyone who dared to. It was a vicious confinement. I am telling you this because I don’t want to make the wrong choice again. Even though I still do not know where grief and hurt should lead, I want to see things as they are and allow myself to not have everything figured out … yet.”

For a while, Hinoka looked at the shy upturn of Takumi’s mouth and the hopeful spark that had returned to his eyes, feeling overcome by gratefulness. At last, she leaned down to press her cheek against his forehead. “Thank you for talking to us,” she murmured, and felt the warmth of her brothers’ embrace around her.

*

If the conversation with Takumi tickled Hinoka’s mind on the vulnerability of a lonely heart, she did not have much time to dwell on the matter. Just two days later, Anthony’s veneer cracked.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- Corrin is this close to being ‘that cousin that’s always mentioned but never appears in the show’, just behind Lilith. I’m so guilty haha….  
> \- When I wrote Xander’s scene, I often thought of how much contrast there is between how I write him and what happens in Birthright. It gave me such feeling of devastation…. Please always be happy, Xander ;-;.


	5. Chapter 5

_It has come to this after all,_ the thought looped in Hinoka’s mind as she quietly moved forward; her eyes followed the sight of Anthony and Corrin cutting their way through the forest, supposedly heading toward a secret entrance into Gyges.

It was a clumsy move on the child’s part. After his previous attempt to lead the army into a trap, he had not devised any better scheme than trying to make Corrin leave campground by herself, nor had he waited for the suspicion on him to ease before acting. He was running out of time. Between making sure that Corrin had no plan with any of her royal siblings and ascertaining that those royals were fully occupied at the time of their leave, Anthony had made many pitiful errors. Before approaching Corrin, he had gone around to make sure that those close to her were preoccupied, that was obvious enough. It was thus that Hinoka and Camilla now thread through the forest on foot, keenly watching the duo and contemplating about the inevitable battle. They had sent Beruka back as the messenger, trusting her to help the army surround the area without rousing suspicion on Anthony’s part.

Hinoka turned to look at her companion. Much like hers, Camilla’s usual armor and weapon had been traded for light plain armor and a short sword. She had braided and tied her lilac hair into a tight bun, which made her tight expression all the more intense. Hinoka couldn’t help but think that there was more than just the worry for Corrin that was bearing down on her mind.

After Anthony’s first blunder, the atmosphere in their families had been peculiar. Corrin was outspoken about her trust in the boy; although she was not ignoring the warning signs, she did put her whole heart into giving Anthony a second chance. Apart from her younger sisters, however, no one else shared her optimism, and it was only natural that they started to prepare for the worst-case scenario. A sense of uncomfortable anticipation had always been present prior to this, and now it had gained the excuse to condense into a heavy cloud that hang over their heads.

At the center of it all, or at least at the center of the little vortex in Hinoka’s heart, was the tense somberness of Camilla. Where she had at least feigned welcome for Anthony before, now she distanced herself from him altogether. It would not have been an unusual reaction coming any other person, but to drop all pretension was not what Hinoka thought the strategic mind of Camilla would choose. Camilla’s siblings had noticed this as well. Hinoka wasn’t sure what Takumi had confided in Prince Leo, but the young Nohrian prince had come to her some days earlier with a few delicately put questions, hoping to enquire about his own sister. _Through her, an outsider!_ In several occasions, she had also caught Prince Xander’s eyes, often when both of them flicked a surprised gaze to Camilla’s face upon hearing a cold turn in her voice.

Well, as far as waiting for the right moment was concerned, Hinoka was done being patient. “Camilla,” she said without prompting, her tone heavy, “you have been quiet these days, you know.”

Camilla turned to her and blinked, needing a moment to catch up. As no further word came, she was forced to speak herself. “Is it longing that I have been failing to understand from the looks you keep sending me then?” she teased stiffly, testing the tone of the conversation.

Hinoka shrugged. “Maybe, maybe not. I am concerned that I don’t have nearly enough penny for your thoughts any more.”

Camilla tried to laugh, looking a little apologetic. “I am guilty as charged, aren’t I?”

“I hope that you would stop thinking that your thoughts are not worth sharing with me. It hurts to hear you say that and hurts even more to learn that you believe it.” Hinoka kept a grim expression and her eyes straight ahead as she felt Camilla’s look on her (she might have added a small pout, just to avoid looking too serious).

The glance turned into a long regard, until Hinoka’s skin started to prickle.

“Consider me chastised, my dear,” Camilla murmured at last, although there remained a stubborness in her voice.

Hinoka needed to push. “My advice is that you shouldn’t let me sulk like this, because I will not stop pestering you for the reason, and until you finally open up to me you will have to suffer a terrible companion on top of your burdens.” That earned a faint but genuine smile from Camilla, so Hinoka turned to her with pleading eyes. “You know that I will never give up on you, don’t you?”

Camilla did not answer. “Darling, if you insist on being so passionate, I will be obliged to keep you all for myself,” she said.

Her teasing tone only made Hinoka want to challenge her more. “And what will you do when I say yes to that?” she said.

“You won’t.” Camilla replied evenly then froze, startled by the sourness of her own voice. The words made Hinoka wince, but at the same time, she felt a twisted satisfaction at Camilla's expression. No humor could save this conversation from it due course any more. She sincerely hoped that Camilla was tired of deflecting from the problem.

Fortunate for her, eventually Camilla sighed and said: “I don’t want to speak about it because even I know that my thoughts are unfair and exaggerated.”

“You know they are not wholesome but you can’t escape them,” Hinoka nodded, trying to appear calm. “Won’t you dissect them for me?”

“Hmn, I think too much. Maybe you should choose where I ought to start.”

“The beginning then. Why did you warn me against trusting our friendship?” Hinoka gritted her teeth after making the direct attack. She wasn’t going to feel sorry about being blunt.

“Not our friendship,” Camilla said defensively, “I meant to warn you against trusting too much in general.”

“Then why use yourself as an example? I knew you was looking out for my safety when you started talking that day, but after that…”

“You remember that conversation awfully well,” Camilla smiled wryly.

“It was disturbing.”

“...I didn’t explain myself very clearly, did I? Considering our situation, you should be careful of seeing your new friendships in too much black and white, too much optimism, in our case. The vulnerability of trust doesn’t start at betrayal or dishonesty, my dear. It starts at differing opinions; the time is fertile for those. Everyone here is desperate for something and their goals are not necessarily similar.”

“So you are afraid that our positions might force us apart once more,” Hinoka said in a firm voice, choosing words that directed the topic back to Camilla.

“It’s _my_ fear, yes,” Camilla admitted. “You don’t think it is unfounded, do you? ‘Force’ is a word that can shift the blame.  I am not proud to say this, but I do have a lot of experience witnessing and living crumbling relationships. The Concubine War was about choosing who to trust and whose trust to give up after all.”

The cryptic mention was enough. “You are right to be concerned,” Hinoka quickly agreed. “But- Do you think that while experiences have sharpened your senses, it might also make you… uhm, paranoid?”

“It might. That’s why I told you that some of my thoughts are not to be taken seriously,” Camilla said sullenly.

They had gone in circle. The frustration made Hinoka stomp forward more forcefully than she had intended. _Patient, patient_ , she told herself. At least she had expanded the horizon, the monster is no longer shapeless.

Another sigh came next to her. “I know you think that we are generally better than that. We won’t let circumstance ruin relationships without a fight, et cetera et cetera. But just look back at what my family did to each other. How quickly did we take Corrin for a traitor? How much time did it take us to corner each other into shedding familial blood?” Camilla’s voice rose heated and icy at the same time. “I was in all of it, Hinoka, that’s why I feel so- so disappointed. If the lesson from the Concubine War has truly been learned, then our path to a truce shouldn’t have been so difficult.  I have killed for my siblings before, Xander has killed for this family too, we were each other’s life line, yet we were none the wiser when this fate cascaded on us. Suddenly, we were confused by our perceived loyalty, perceived duty, perceived morality, like children who could not differ what they were told to do from what they knew to be right. Laughable.”

Hinoka reached out and gripped Camilla’s forearm in an act to calm both of them down. Camilla was breathing heavily; cold anger rolled out from her, a true poison that could burn everything it touched -  herself, Prince Xander, their circumstance, hope. Hinoka’s heart was thumping rapidly in her ears. She needed a few moments to digest the accusations that had spilled from Camilla’s lips; they sat like boulders at the pit of her stomach, making her tense and breathless.

Camilla raised her arm and let Hinoka’s hand slide into her palm. Their gloved fingers were large and clumsy for this; neither of them minded. Brilliant sunlight shone through the leaves onto the forest floor, but Hinoka felt chilly.

“I’m very paranoid, Hinoka.” Camilla said in a small voice. “Before, I have spoken of my wariness toward Anankos’s attention on Corrin. Now I’m starting to feel wary toward the whole war and the sense of doom that it carries. Everywhere it touches, we find insanity. First this dragon, then my father, probably that Duke of Nestra as well. Thing after thing test the strength of our bonds and our will to fight. Your mother was assassinated just after she was united with Corrin. Scarlet died because of a traitor we have yet found. Each day I am filled with happiness that I’m surrounded by my family and yours, I am also reminded that I would have gone mad myself had any of us been killed in one of our previous clashes.”

Hinoka squeezed her hand. “If it has turned into a battle for you, remember that we have one major victory already, when Corrin brought us together.”

Camilla nodded curtly, a tight smile played on her lips. “We have other victories too, like you and I,” she added. “It’s only the fear that I can’t chase away. I don’t doubt that more pain and torture will be thrown our way. I have the distinct feeling that either Anankos or fate want to destroy Corrin’s ideals in the vilest method. Not through greed or cruelty, but through the betrayal of all that’s good. Look at that child, Hinoka.” She indicated her head at the direction of Anthony and Corrin. “What is he? And what has happened to the people of Valla?”

Hinoka looked on with a clenched heart. If Anthony was really just a child, then Anankos had become evil’s embodiment. If he was a mere puppet, then Hinoka shivered to think of the devious magic practiced by this deranged god. She could not deny either possibilities, for the march had shown her glimpses of Anankos’s world. The villages and towns of Valla were small and the atmosphere was subdued. After more than a decade, the people appeared to have accepted the lost of their monarchs and having their founding god becoming completely unhinged. Unlike Anthony, most of them greeted the army with calm indifference and showed little interest in whether the reign would change hand. Their lives paled compared to the rich culture and history still depicted in their texts. If anything, Hinoka was more likely to believe that the whole kingdom had been put under a spell.

“I hate to see Corrin putting this much faith into him, even though she knows she will be hurt.” Camilla sighed. “She just doesn’t do anything half way.”

“Maybe she sympathizes with him. She was subjected to a lot of doubt from us,” Hinoka reasoned.

Camilla fell into silence, leaving Hinoka torn as to whether she should prod any further. She could sense that there was more troubling Camilla’s mind, but she wasn’t sure if they were ready to examine more. She herself was a little bewildered and exhausted. At the same time, she did not want to stop; when she imagined that Camilla had to face these thoughts every day, she wanted to be brave for her.

In the end, Camilla made the choice for both of them. “Does it satisfy you to hear this much yet? It’s wrong to soak up these kinds of emotion, darling. I keep them to myself for a reason-”

“Keep talking to me.” Hinoka cut her off and gathered her resolution. She could not be discouraged now.

“You want to hear something more hideous?” Camilla’s voice trembled only for a split second.

Hinoka immediately nodded. Even though she disagreed with Camilla’s negative word, she chose to stay silent and showed her willingness to listen. As she gazed upon Camilla’s face, her heart felt weak at the quiet sadness etched on those lovely features.

“I have always known that the happy days I have with my siblings are numbered, I try to live these days to fullest because of that. We all have too many ambitions and obligations, we won’t be able to have the same mind and speak the same voice for much longer. I just assume that when the signs appear, I would be able to predict the long road toward our eventual split and prepare myself accordingly. No one will find me less than satisfied with their choices. But I didn’t expect to see those signs so soon. They shake me nonetheless-”

“Wait. Wait a minute.” Hinoka said. “Why do you speak as if your ties will be cut? What are the signs you are speaking of?”

“Simply choices, Hinoka. Corrin and Azura wanting to stay in Valla, for example. Remember that I am not saying that it is anyone’s fault.”   

“But no matter what path they choose, they will always be your sister. Surely you can’t doubt their hearts on that!”

“I don’t doubt them at all, but lives lived apart make people grow into strangers before they can realize, my dear. Why, I thought I knew Corrin before, but after the short time she spent in Hoshido, I could barely follow her thoughts. To always be sisters is a very comforting thing to hear, but to be able to act on that is a luxury of peaceful time. Once this war end, each of us will pursue a new goal, and it would be lucky if we could be near each other, less so if we must part, and too bad if we become enemies. Life in court means tough choices, where being my sister may not be one that she can afford. Or, let's be less dramatic, I simply think that what one day our bonds will be watered down into some type of affectionate acquaintance.  I am not afraid or bitter, merely… anticipative.”

 _And lonely,_ Hinoka thought, not daring to say the word out loud. Her tongue seemed to have turned into ash in her mouth. She wanted to ask if Camilla thought their own friendship to be brittle and hopeless as well, but she knew it was not the problem. Sweet, loving, ever strong Camilla – that was what everyone always saw, not this overthinking and stubbornly contradictive person next to her.

Camilla rubbed a thumb on the back of Hinoka's hand and heaved a sigh. “I, too, hope that I will stop feeling this way soon. Maybe I’m panicking because a part of me remember the pain as well as numbness I felt in my younger years. You can tell I struggle to let go, like how I cling to Corrin and smother her even when I know I have outstayed my welcome.”

“You have not,” Hinoka had to correct that.

“Yet.”

 _Circle,_ Hinoka wanted to scream.

“What of your brothers and Elise? Why do you speak like you won’t stay together?”

Camilla contemplated for a long time at this question. “They suit the court life. I do not and I don’t plan to.”

The answer floored Hinoka. She stood still with wide eyes, making Camilla stopped as well. The revelation rang in her head. “You mean… What do you mean?”

Camilla regarded her with calm eyes. “If we survive this war, I don’t think I will be involved in governing work anymore. I'm also choosing a path that will lead me away from all of you.”

The idea had never entered Hinoka's mind. Who could have thought? Camilla was too good at what she did for this to be a possibility. The dim future she drew suddenly made sense. If she no longer took up in princess duties, would everyone leave her behind as they chase their own paths? Most of them wouldn't even meet her again. Could Hinoka even defend their bond then? Could she assure Camilla that no matter what happen, they would stay the closest of friends, have mutual things to talk about? What did it matter if she could only offer so much?

"Come on.” Camilla tugged her hand, then dropped it and turned to walk forward.

Hinoka blinked and willed her legs to move. "Won't you help Prince Xander and Prince Leo anymore?"

"I leave the dreaming to them, I have lost the fire long ago. Without passion, my efforts are half-hearted. I may help them rebuilding Nohr for a few years, after that we will have a better system and better people to do my jobs. To me the end is clear and inevitable."

Hinoka frowned even deeper at the finality in her tone. The way Camilla put herself down was troubling. Hinoka knew well the strength of Camilla’s network and the brilliance of her intellect; she did not believe that Camilla had never found any interest or sense of accomplishment with what she had created. Where had the inspirational writer behind ‘Marx’ gone? If Camilla could be made to forget what joy and worth she had found in these works, what did it say about how unhappy she was inside?

Once again, her steps slowed down. Although her eyes strained on the shadows of Corrin and Anthony, her mind was chaotic. She knew reason could do little to persuade Camilla, and she was frustrated at not knowing know how to make Camilla _feel_ better. Not to mention that there was another question swirling inside her. _What place would I have beside you?_ Oh it stung, it stung terribly.

She didn’t notice that Camilla had stopped as well. The feeling of fingers brushing against her nape made Hinoka jump. "Darling, you are supposed to throw my sordid thoughts back at my face, not getting tangled up like this.” Camilla said in a sad voice. “I have too much respect for you; time and again you have asked me to be honest and I thought it was high time I stop running away, but right now I regret having opened my mouth."

Hinoka could only respond by shaking her head. Dimly, she heard Camilla continued soothingly, "Let me deal with my heart on my own. With time and the end of the war, it will be placated. At least I still have my wit with me. I know that the future hides nothing that I can't bear..."

 _Then when will it stop hurting you?_ She thought. _Is there hope for your happiness at the end of this bleakness?_ Fate had set up this war to break hearts and promised heavy sacrifices as results. Hinoka knew it would haunt her for a long time, this image of Camilla, calm and alone, bracing for pain to seep into her until she was numb.

*

She saw Camilla's wisdom after they fought the Vallite force that day. No matter how much Corrin had prepared herself for the possibility of betrayal, she was not unaffected by the revelation of Anthony's identity and his undignified ending. She had just started to learn that war broke people in too many ways to count.

It didn't help either that Azura sighted Queen Arete in their next battle.

\-------

\-------

It shouldn’t bother Ryoma that the atmosphere around camp was less than cheerful after they entered Gyges. This level of stress was not alarming in time of war. As an elder brother, however, he could not help but be concerned about the changes in his sisters. He was still thinking about whether his intervention would be welcome when, thankfully, other people took matter into their hands.

It was a few days after they first encountered Queen Arete. The march since then had been uneventful, enough to keep everyone on their toes. As the war council was about to adjourn for lunch, Felicia stepped in and, in shaky voice, asked for a minute of their time.

Upon their chorus of agreement, she hastily went out of the room and returned with Niles.

“We, uh, I thought that we should tell you,” Felicia tripped over her words. “Since everyone has a lot of worries lately. I thought that maybe telling you the news would cheer you up. Just a little bit, you know. S-small joy…”

Next to her, Niles rolled his eyes, apparently set to spell out everything clearly. “I asked Felicia for her hand and she accepted my proposal.”

One could hear a pin drop in the silence.

“I- I did. Yesterday.” Felicia bravely spoke up.

“Oh, oh Felicia!” Corrin exclaimed, finally woke up from her stunned state. She shot up from the chair and embraced Felicia tightly. “I’m so happy for you!” She reached an arm to include Niles in the hug as well. “You too, lucky you!”

“Why did I know nothing of this?!” Prince Leo cried without heat. He walked around the table to reach Niles and gave the man several playful punches. To Ryoma’s surprise, Takumi soon joined the group gathering around the happy couple (and punching).

He was even more surprised when loud knocks sounded on the door, followed by an angry Orochi rushing unceremoniously into the room.

“You!” She pointed a finger at Niles. “I can’t believe you did this! We were first! We did everything before you, he asked first and I said yes first! We thought of announcing the news before you even found a ring for Felicia!”

“First come first served.” Niles shrugged, “It’s not like this is a competition, either.”

“Like hell it isn’t,” Orochi spat. Before anyone could reprimand her or ask what was going on, she had stuck her head outside of the door and shouted. “Jakob! Come on, we lost!”

A short while later, Jakob appeared, pushing a refreshment tray as Orochi held open the door for him. He shot a murderous glare toward Niles, “You chancer,” he hissed.

“Ay ay, Felicia decided the timing, not me. I’m completely innocence.”

They were on the brink of another incomprehensible argument when Princess Camilla leaned over the table and smiled. “Oh, I see Those are very pretty rings you two are sporting right there.”

Corrin whipped her head around. “You two are getting married too?”

“Not too, my lady. First!” Orochi reiterated. The whole table laughed at this.

“Well, I am delighted.” Princess Camilla said. “I was wondering when this would happen among any of our good friends. Love seems to have been blooming all around since our armies joined force; I saw many people busy shopping when we stopped in the last town.”

“And I have heard the blacksmith complain several times that he is in no way a jeweller.” Xander added amusedly.

“Hmn,” Azura pondered. “Does this mean that we need a mass wedding?”

“Well, we don’t ‘need’ one,” Corrin laughed. “But it’s a good idea. It would be great if we can give that to our comrades, don’t you think?” She turned to the the couples of the hour.

“A ceremony, you say?” Felicia asked with hope in her voice. “Oh, you are so good to us, my lady.”

Next to her, Jakob looked at the joyful expression on Corrin’s face and sighed. “I don’t really want to see Niles at my wedding after what he just did, but I understand the merit of holding such an event. And of course, I live to serve you, Lady Corrin.”

Corrin giggled and turned back to address the rest of the group. “What do you say, brothers? Sisters?”

More smiles, more shrugs.

“I’d say we can afford a day of rest as well,” Ryoma grinned. “We should let the word out now and see if many couples want to participate in the ceremony. If there are, let’s take a day off, though not exactly at the same time for everyone, of course. We’ll just arrange it so that people’s duty tomorrow get spread over two days instead.”

“That’s lovely, brother!” Corrin said excitedly. Her sentiment was shared by other council members, and soon Ryoma somehow found himself dragged around camp by his enthusiastic sister to make announcement and tallies up the number of people to be wed. He would have argued that these were hardly their job, but there’s no denying that he enjoyed himself immensely, particularly each time a couple jumped up happily and said yes to their offer. It turned out to be a lunch time full of fun for him, with little regard for food and all attention given to people asking questions, expressing joy, giving suggestions, and volunteering to help.

It was thus that when he briefly saw Xander whispered something to Princess Camilla and she reacted with a startled look, he did not think much of this detail nor remembered about it until quite a bit later. In fact, he was only reminded of it when, after all the hustle and bustle, he suddenly recalled that he was going to have a lot of time to himself in the following two days, as would Xander.

He walked around to find Xander and finally spotted him sitting on a bench in the veranda at the back side of their building. Xander’s appearance made him stopped in his track, however. He had changed to an outfit of nondescript grey and black colors, with nothing to suggest of a knight or a noble. Next to him, on the bench, lay a plain sword and two large bundles wrapped in oil cloth, one of which Ryoma made out to be the vague size of Siegfried.

Xander sat with a look of intense focus, one hand placed on his faithful black notebook on his laps. He looked up upon hearing Ryoma’s footsteps.

Then a smile broke out over his face, and Ryoma let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “Are you heading out to somewhere, Xander?” He asked.

Xander nodded, taking a moment before answering evenly: “Considering that we are going to stay stationed in the next two days and have some down time in between, I am asking Lilith to take me back to Nohr so that I can see to a few matters.”

The news stunned Ryoma. He couldn’t help but stared and stared.

Xander cleared his throat. “It is not for anything urgent, simply that in this sensitive period, any advantage gained is useful, and a face-to-face meeting will bring much more assurance to all parties than any word.”

“I understand, Xander. You don’t have to justify yourself,” Ryoma said hastily, “I’m just surprised.” Then softer. “When do you plan to leave?”

“Shortly. I have already talked to Corrin. I was going to go find you, but you have found me first.” Xander gave a thin smile.

“…Who are you taking with you? Not only Peri and Laslow, I hope?”

Xander furrowed his brows. “I don’t plan to have more than two other people with me. Including Lilith, we will have four people, more than that is rather conspicuous. Also for this reason, it won’t be Peri or Laslow who comes with me. I already stand out too much. I will bring Charlotte and Nyx.”

Rationally, Ryoma had to agree to these choices. The two ladies were street smart, they had the wisdom and power to accomplish many things while staying blended in the crowd; besides, he had heard of Nyx’s special task with the dark magicians. Yet he could not erase the nervous flutters in his stomach. It was ironic, considering how he had jumped into much greater dangers with rasher attitude before.

Xander seemed to notice that Ryoma’s worry has not been entirely dispelled, and so he said: “It is unlikely to be dangerous. With the conditions of Windmire and what I plan to do, I don’t think anyone can cause trouble for me. Even if I meet people and somehow news gets out that I am present in the capital, with Lilith’s help we will be gone before they can catch up with us. I won’t be there for two whole days.”

He looked at Ryoma before proceeding carefully. “I would like to spend some time in …Cheve. After the moves we have taken involving them, I think it’s time that their court know we have a strong alliance; a little more truth may bring them closer to our side and help both of you and me. And then, Lady Scarlet’s personal belongings…”

Ryoma felt his heart sunk. He briefly shut his eyes, “These are supposed to be my responsibilities,” he said quietly.

Xander shook his head. “Let Hoshido’s name stay out of painful talks. That you and the Fourth Company were tangled up in Nestra’s plot was not your fault. Whatever intention you and Lady Scarlet had, you never meant any harm toward Cheve, and I won’t let Cheve hold what happened over you.”

“Even if any of this was a coincidence, I am responsible all the same.”

“I know how you feel, but maybe we can solve this matter step by step,” Xander spoke in the deep voice that Ryoma could never refuse. “Let me lay the ground for your path. Let me bring closure to as much as possible, such that when you come to meet them, you won’t be so heavily burdened. I hope that instead of suspecting intimidation, they will feel respected by Hoshido, and I also hope that you will be welcome by the remaining knights of the Fourth Company with genuine affection. Haven’t these been our goals all along?”

Ryoma sighed and sat down on the bench. “I have no idea what it is really like in Nohr or Cheve, so this just sounds terribly risky to me.”

“It won’t be,” Xander smiled. “The matter will be on the private and confidential side, as I am coming alone and on very short notice after all. Both the Chevois court and I will have less pressure.”

“You won’t have any trouble contacting my agents in Nohr, will you?”

“No, not at all.”

Ever since the official diplomatic tie between Nohr and Hoshido was cut, the only peaceful proxy they had left in each other's kingdom was one or two agents who disguised themselves as harmless business people from friendly countries. They were different from spies, who the courts knew always tried to get rid of. These brave people were a secret only to the public, not the high commands in court; they delivered confidential messages between the kingdoms and, when needed, served as a contact point to the spies of their motherland. These agents were simultaneously the most protected and the most surveilled people in both lands. It was thanks to them that even now, when the two countries had worked together on several tasks, neither Xander nor Ryoma had had to give up information about each other's secret agents.

“How about your work in Nohr? Can I help with anything?” Ryoma persisted.

Xander patted his hand, “There is no need. I am only meeting a few people, maybe taking a brief look at what my- King Garon had left behind before he disappeared. It bears certain danger, but I have my way. I will take utmost care, I promise, my most important duty is here and I will return to it on time.”

Ryoma could only take a long look at Xander, feeling his reasons and emotions at war with each other. _It must be a hundred times more dangerous than he says,_ the heart quipped. _Of course it is, but of course Xander will overcome it all,_ replied the mind. Everything made Ryoma want to shake his head and laugh at himself. I _am even more nervous about this than he is_ , he thought with humor. Wasn’t it not that long ago, when he still carried the assumption that Xander’s gravitas was the exterior of a proud and traditionalistic mind? Now, he could only look on with wide eyes as his friend sat there, serenely proposing ideas that both amazed and terrified Ryoma. Not for the first occasion in recent time, he felt a heat wiggling and spreading inside, arousing in him the bubbling sense of focus and _living._ He felt that soon he would have no choice but to look directly at it and call it by its true name, but for now, he was content to taste it in small flickers.

"I can hardly wait for the day you become king, Xander," he said fondly.

Xander looked surprised; he opened his mouth, but then closed it without saying his first thought. A beat later, he smiled and said: "You are optimistic. Thank you for that."

And Ryoma did not miss how Xander had resigned to graceful acceptance. “Do you expect differently?”

“Well, I just don’t think I can make such a positive leap in confidence as you do. Ruling is never peaceful,” Xander chuckled. Then he looked at Ryoma with apologetic eyes. “To be honest, I was afraid that you would be displeased by my plan to go to Cheve. I made that decision without talking to you first, even though this has to do with Hoshido as well.”

Ryoma huffed out a laugh. “You were afraid but you did it anyway? Yes, I can see where problem can arise between us, because I’m also used to making the final decision. On principle, that would easily create arguments, but you can see that it has not. You and I are not ordinary friends, you needn’t worry too much.”

Xander sighed. “How I wished that Nohr are filled with people like you and your followers,” he smiled wryly, tension easing away. “Great doers and great talkers, too.”

“Speak for yourself! Just give the word and I would be happy to replace my court with people you recommend.”

“I would not put much hope in that,” Xander’s expression turned somber, although he maintained a smile.

“I remember,” he continued after a brief pause, “When I learnt of how you genuinely did not know of Nohr’s situation, there was an idea that sparked in me. Of course I was cynical and even angry about your ignorance,” Xander chuckled lowly, “but this tiny idea stuck with me, that in the animosity you used to have toward us, you were compassionate. Truly compassionate. That’s why when you first heard Leo’s argument, you thought that the Nohrians didn’t deserve the hardships they have been bearing. Compare to that, I have known Nohrians worse than monsters, you can’t imagine.”

Ryoma shuddered as Xander’s eyes bore into his.

“They hated Nohr, Ryoma, I don’t have the words to describe…” Xander said. “They never cared if their deeds tramped on the life and dignity of other people. They would suck from the kingdom to satisfy their greed and ego, twist any facts and wreck anything that stand in their way, history and future be damned. They were cruel, inhumane, all the while cunning and petty too. You’d get sick. When I heard my father said he wanted to destroy both Hoshido and Nohr, I believed it at once. I knew people were capable of insanity like that, even if this was from my own father. I have seen the signs many times, it is not rhetorical.”

“The funny thing is, I am also neck deep in this swamp. I do have self-confidence, but if I say I have never taken a controversial position or been dead wrong, I would be arrogant and lying. Look at Iago, Hans, Zola, look at how many times we Nohrians have had to turn our swords on each other. There is a bit of me in each thing that happened. When I see you being so sure about goodness, I admire you and Hoshido for what you can believe in.”

Xander crossed his arms in front of his chest, his face turned to look straight forward. Ryoma was transfixed by the sight. Coming down through the tree leaves, broken rays of sunlight were painting everything in hazy gold – the pale locks that he had seen dripped with rain or tousled by the wind, the skin he had seen dull with sleeplessness or warm with humor, the eyes that he once was wary of and now could not help seeking... Shaking his head lightly, he stood up and step around to face Xander. He raised a hand to touch Xander’s shoulder, lightly tugging here and there from his elbows down to his forearms and slowly uncoiled the tight defense.

In the look in Xander’s eyes, he found question as well as trust, so when at last Xander sighed and let his hand be held again, Ryoma felt no hesitation as he brought it up and press his cheek to the dorsum.

It was the small hitch of breath from Xander that truly woke Ryoma to the nature of his action. Even then, even as he raised his head to see Xander’s astonished expression, he felt nothing other than certainty and elation. His heart felt light. For a moment, he did not think of finding an explanation for himself or Xander but instead took time to commit to memory the openness on Xander’s face. Amidst the surprise and confusion, there was no trace of dark cloud.

Just as quickly as he had made this spontaneous move, Ryoma stepped back and smiled. He knew what he needed to do. “Don’t leave yet, Xander. You must trust yourself. Let me- Let me show you. Give me ten minutes.” He squeezed Xander’s hand. “Please see me before you set out. I’ll be in my room.”

Without lingering any further, he swiftly went inside the building.

*

Xander must have sat there for hours.

_(But the sun hardly changed?)_

Did he imagine his exchange with Ryoma? No, he remembered every detail. It was short, the atmosphere between them was as easy as ever; yet how did it come to this? Ryoma, who was always quick to reassure him whenever he expressed doubt toward himself… Xander could guess Ryoma’s broader intention, but the action… the pure amount of confidence and emotion given into it made his heart race and his head dizzy. It was even worse that Xander’s effort to understand what had transpired was further muddled by wild imaginations of how he would have _liked_ to interpret it. The intensity of these sudden wills struck Xander. Ever since they became friends, he had often let himself be swept up by Ryoma’s positivity. It couldn’t be helped, he was drawn to it like a firefly. Its power had proved itself to be neither illusional or fleeting, had carried him through hard situations, even changed him. Ryoma kept giving and giving, freely, readily; it always made Xander feel that the least he could do was to take another step at being better. Right now, however, he wasn’t sure what step he should consider. He stared at his hand at length, replaying the scene in his mind. That little press seemed like the most innocent gesture, but Xander felt as though the simpler the answer, the more he should be afraid of it.

He finally looked up when the door to the veranda opened and Camilla stepped out. “Xander, Charlotte and Nyx are ready,” she said.

“Hmn? Oh,” he replied faintly and scrambled to stand up, catching the forgotten notebook as it threatened to slide to the ground. His own knees felt stiff. “I- I will…”

Camilla raised her eyebrows.

Xander raised both of his hands, knowing too well the questioning look she was sporting. “There… There’s nothing to worry about my plan. I was thinking about something else.”

“What can I say when you are so honest?”  His sister laughed as they walked inside together.

Xander shook his head in embarrassment, trying to shove his confusion away to focus on the matter at hand. Upon finding his companions in the living room, he left his belongings with them. “I still need to talk to Prince Ryoma, then we will set out soon,” he said; his voice was steadier than he expected, and he figured that he must quickly leave the room before this exact thought about expectation make him blush.

He did blush as he crossed to the living room of the Hoshidan wing and climbed the stairs. Then the heated agitation in him gradually turned into cool nervousness. The higher he ascended, the slower he stepped; when he reached the third floor, he walked a softly as possible. A couple of rooms down the hallway, his destination awaited.

Ryoma had left the door open. For him, Xander hazarded a guess. When he arrived at the entrance, he saw Ryoma sitting at the desk, his back turned toward the door. Xander stopped there and watched. Was there anything to say about what had happened earlier? Was he supposed to behave like it was all normal, the way Ryoma had acted, had looked at him? _Has it changed anything for me?_

Xander knocked lightly out of courtesy.

Ryoma immediately looked up and left his seat. “Xander,” he quickly said as he walked toward the door, “Xander, I must give you this.” Xander glimpsed at the items Ryoma had left on the desk and unconsciously swallowed. One of them was a jade seal, now placed on top of a square of blue silk, together with a box of red paste.

In front of him, Ryoma had reached into the front panel of his shirt and produced a small item that fit well in his palm, only a loop of silver cord made known its presence in his grasp. The look in Ryoma’s eyes made Xander accept it without question. It was a wooden box. From the shape and size, he guessed it to be an inro, although the item felt much heavier in his palm than an inro would commonly suggest. It was lacquered in velvet black and exquisitely inlaid with mother-of-pearl. The decoration made the scene of two herons hailing two full moons as they crossed the night sky – the moon’s bright reflection lay on the water surface depicted below the birds, while the real moon was an actual, perfect pearl strung on the cord, taking the place of the ojime though not functioning as one. The overall design was understated while the execution unrivaled. It made Xander all the more nervous about the content inside.

With a push of his finger, the box opened, and Xander forgot to breathe.

Attached directly to the lid was a block of solid gold, silently sliding out of the container as Xander moved the lid. Casted in relief on the front were Ryoma’s full name and title. One the back, the Hoshidan imperial seal.

There laid in Xander’s palm the insignia of Ryoma’s personal power, still warm from the heat of his chest.

“Y- You can’t do this,” Xander shook his head in disbelief. “I can’t-”

But Ryoma had placed a hand on Xander’s wrist and squeezed. “I trust you and I hope you trust me in that judgment,” he said with a winning smile. Xander found he had no word to protest.

Ryoma turned back to retrieved the paper from his desk and gave it to Xander. There was little doubt what it entailed anymore. _I, Crown Prince of the Kingdom of Hoshido and General of the Hoshidan Imperial Army, hereby require the prompt and diligent compliance of all Hoshidan agents present in the Kingdom of Nohr and all Hoshidan offices involved in related responsibilities to all requests for aid or action from the Crown Prince of the Kingdom of Nohr, until further notice. His words are to be taken as mine, and subsequent reports regarding the conduct of these requests are to be made directly to my office, as well as any agent appointed by His Highness for this purpose._

The red of the seal burnt into Xander’s mind, laying there on the elegant patterned paper, gleaming where it intertwined with the black ink of the last line and Ryoma’s precise signature.

“Take this as me doing my duty as your ally and contributing as your supporter,” Ryoma said. “I know it is highly unconventional, but there is nothing wrong. I also have it on good authority that you will not abuse your power.”

Xander wanted to tell him that this mindset was actually terribly wrong. He also did not want to. He thought Ryoma should feel lucky that Xander was just plain old unambitious Xander. He also thought that he was going to come unglued in three seconds, all the while admonishing Ryoma for rocking his world like this.

He did none of these. Instead, he took a deep breath. Then another.

_So much trust. So much._

With trembling fingers, he carefully folded the letter and deposited it and the inro into his breast pocket. “I take it back,” he said in a shaky voice, “I don’t want you in my court after all. One Leo kicking at my back is already enough.”

Ryoma broke out in cheerful laughter. The sound made Xander relax further, his lips finally able to stretch into a smile again. He clasped arms with Ryoma. “Would you like to write a letter for the Fourth Company as well?” he asked softly.

“I should.” Ryoma replied in a jovial mood. He returned to his desk and pulled out another sheet of paper. Xander watched as he picked up his brush, stared down at the page for a moment, then started writing in a resolute manner. _Just seeing his energy makes me believe,_ Xander thought.

“Now you are inspiring me to get a lot of things done,” he said out loud.

“No no no,” Ryoma said without lifting his head. “Be safe, Xander. Please be absolutely safe.”

For a flash of a moment, Xander wondered if many of their arguments would play out like this from then on. It was a strangely comforting thought. His earlier questions at the threshold seemed to soften and mellow out, sliding into the same pool of comfort at the back of his mind. So he sat down on a chair behind Ryoma, rested his eyes on Ryoma’s broad back, and allowed himself to think of nothing at all as he waited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- I edited this chapter last week but I'm not sure if this had the right version in my Google Drive for posting tonight. I'm away from home right now so I can only hope that this version is not littered with mistakes :-$.  
> \- Yay short chapter! You can tell that we’re finally crossing into fluff territory lol. No one is getting children in the war, please don’t worry.  
> \- Uh, I didn’t expect to have so much trouble describing Ryoma’s item. It’s a block/badge that allow a person to act in someone else’s place. Typically, Ryoma’s surbordinate would only need that badge to act in his place, but Xander’s a special case so I made Ryoma write a letter as well. There isn’t really an English word for it, so if you are interested in seeing some examples, please Google Image “令牌 auction”. I invented the ‘stuck in an inro’ part.


	6. Chapter 6

The wedding befitted war time. It felt spontaneous, inclusive, utilitarian. Throughout the next morning, people chipped in their extended down time to decorate and cook, some volunteered their personal items and talents for the fun of the event. Bit by bit, a stage was put together. With nearly two dozen couples to be wedded, the amount of traditions to be observed would be cumbersome if they were not done away altogether, and done away they were.

Two mismatched pieces of beige canvas were clipped together and hung down from a string crossed between two poles. They had glued some sheets of paper together to make one big poster and used red ink to write down the names of the happy people on it. The poster was hung at the center of the joined canvas; a line of chair was placed in front of it for the brides and grooms. Each pair of chair had a plain fabric bag laid across them and two flowers on top of the bag. On the large empty ground in front of this make-shift stage, bonfires had been prepared, ready to serve a memorable night.

Everything was good to go by mid-afternoon. The crowd that gathered looked entirely different from an army. Gone were the armors and the dark expressions; it seemed as if they were already drunk from expectation. As he stood at one side of the stage, Takumi felt the bright spirit warming him to the core. He looked to all other royal members who were around, found their blinding smiles, and was unable to suppress a broad grin of his own.

A short fanfare sounded. The moment the first couple appeared from behind the canvas, people roared up in cheers, getting louder as the people of the hour walked out in their best clothes. Things got thrown up on stage like a small rain - flowers, rice, candies, small nuts. As she joined the brides and grooms, Corrin had to swat away a heavy bunch of holly fruit that was sailing through the air like a vicious bird.

“All right, everyone, please calm down,” she giggled to the crowd. “I would like our lovely couples to survive until they are actually married.” When the commotion had subsided, she looked down to the paper she was clutching in her hand. It was cramped with tiny letters. “Wow,” she said, blinking, “I think I am too nervous to read all of this. I can’t believe I wrote everything here.” Admist laughters, she began to stick it back into her pocket, then thought again and opened it once more _._ She cleared her throat, paused for a moment for silence to return, then began. “My dear friends, we are assembled here today to celebrate the joining of many of our friends in matrimony. You may have known them since childhood or first met them just this year, but I have no doubt that as we stand here, we feel nothing but the greatest happiness and wish nothing but the sweetest joy to our brave, beautiful, loving friends. By your presence, you celebrate with them the love they have discovered in each other and you support their decision to commit themselves to one another for the rest of their lives.”

She turned to face the couples, “Dearest friends. Today we celebrate your vow of loyalty to each other, your promise to overcome sorrows and reach for the good times together.” She started calling each of their names. “…, Niles and Felicia, Jakob and Orochi, are you ready?”

The chorus of ‘We are’ was almost lost in the hoots and cheers from the crowd. Corrin moved to stand in front of the first couple. Each couple had written their own vow and elected beforehand how it was to be performed. Some exchanged rings, some tied ribbons. Some bestowed kisses on lips or brows, some touched their forehead together. Some put the flowers behind each other’s ear, some threw the blossoms to the crowd. (Niles insisted that Jakob switched flowers with him because ‘that orange is special to the Ice Tribe’, just to irk the butler).

Sometimes the crowd clamored with laughter, sometimes it was still in suspense. With cheers came tears.

“And noooow, to the fun part!” Corrin said brightly after the serious portion was completed. “Present time! Hold out your harvest sack, people!” As the couples took the bags on their chairs and sat down, Corrin took out a small coin purse. She reached inside, grabbed out an obscured amount of money, dropped it into the first presented bag and said her congratulation. While she went through the rest of the line, the other royal members went behind the canvas to get the baskets of present that they had prepared. These were only token gifts, of course. Takumi raised his brows as he put a pineapple into the bag that Felicia and Niles were holding. “Do your worst on this guy, Felicia. Whip him into shape,” he said. “Ask me if you need something spikier than this.”

“I love you too, my lord,” Niles smirked.

Next to them, Elise cheerfully announced to Orochi and Jakob: “I especially prepared some tea for you! I hope you will enjoy many peaceful days together.” She dug around in her basket and took out an envelope. As Jakob held out a hand, she placed it in his palm instead of putting it into the bag.

Jakob sniffed the envelope, his eyes widened in surprise. “It’s my favourite blend. How did you know, my lady?”

“Why, Orochi took some tea from your personal tin to put in here!” Elise replied good-naturedly.

Jakob threw his grinning wife a dirty look. Takumi knew then that these two were made for each other.

Without any need for a proper announcement, the more unorganized part of wedding began soon afterward. The crowd moved up, surrounded the happy people to offer more gifts and congratulations; the bags started to become full and stuck out in odd shapes (Takumi saw a couple getting a dented but otherwise very fine kettle, another got a cock feather duster). This shift in the mass free up the space needed to start the bonfires. Foods and drinks were brought out or further cooked; music and dancing started here and there. No one noticed when the sky turned dark and cool mist sunk around them.

By the time Takumi sat down on the bench of the patio table far from the center of the party, his body was loose and sore from too much shouting and laughter. He scooted over to the side of Hinoka and clung to her arm. “Your wedding should be like this,” he giggled.

“Why are you making assumption about me getting married?” She smiled and patted him on the back.

“You are my big sister, so any scary scenario drawn up between us must have you as the primary victim.” His declaration received several chuckles from across the table, where the commonly seen trio Laslow, Selena, and Odin sat together. No reaction was elicited from the other side of Hinoka, as it was Beruka who was sitting there.

“I know other people have said it, but I really want to thank all of you for allowing this,” Laslow regarded them warmly. “It is not easy to stop stressing out and make space for rest in the middle of war, especially for you. As our leaders, you always have to think ahead, even more so when unpleasant possibilities overwhelm optimistic ones.”

Hinoka made a non-committal sound, “That means you should enjoy tonight to its fullest, because you can.” The line made Takumi briefly glance at her. This was not the usual sanguine attitude from his sister.

“I am. It’s all so fascinating, so passionate and full of life,” Laslow replied. “I like it whenever we have a joyous wedding in Nohr too. It’s like sudden fireworks blooming in the long and dark night, reminding us to dream and hope.”

“Aye!” Odin agreed sloppily around a mouthful of wine. He gulped it down, thus finishing his ration of alcohol for the special event; already, there was color on his cheeks. “I must keep my eyes wide open tonight and feast on the sight of love,” he spoke, sounding relatively normal compared to his usual self. “There won’t be one like this again.”

“There’d better be no other war like this,” Selena drily added.

“How are weddings in Nohr?” Takumi asked.

“Among we commoners, it’s pretty much like what you have seen between Felicia and Niles. Vows, ring exchange. We throw paper confetti and candies. Some brides and grooms want to have a senior family member walk them down the aisle, but there are all kinds of variation these days,” Laslow said.

“Thinking about that, the dire situation in recent years have created certain trends,” Selena added. “I am seeing more and more ceremonies that are simply bare-bone, and many others that try to cramp as many rituals in as possible.”

“It’s not just with weddings, everything is getting a little more extreme in both directions,” Laslow remarked. “If you see the plays and songs that are popular among our people these days compare to four years ago, you would notice. I think it is a way of coping. Everyone is making spiritual escapes.”

“Except for the dusty no-obles,” Odin slurred. “O, how one must pray for the light of love and justice to pierce through their mud minds. Even the splendid fire in my heart want to snuff in their presence; they make everything looks like a funeral because they are already dead inside.”

Takumi snorted out a laugh. He turned to look at the merry crowd, noticing that people were engaging in all kinds of games and pranks. It was endearing. Compared to this scene, weddings of high society were simply tedious.

Behind him, Odin murmured: “And how I must cry that s-soon, I won’t even see another Nohrian wedding.”

It took a moment for the words to register. As he turned back with confusion, Takumi found a bizzare scene. The table was silently staring at the drooping magician. Laslow flicked his gaze up once, met Hinoka questioning eyes, and promptly looked away. Selena harrumphed. Beruka merely observed.

The awkwardness made Takumi even more puzzled. Then Hinoka schooled her surprised look, leaned back a little and took a sip of wine, but her relaxation was an effort. “What are your plan after the war?” She asked lightly. “Any plan for vacation? Some adventure together?”

Silence reigned for a couple of minutes, then Odin suddenly raised his head. “We can’t tell you, my lady,” he said with drunken determination, his eyes had pretty much lost focus. If not, they surely did after Selena jammed an elbow into his side. Hinoka answering laugh was al ittle strained. “Why the reluctance to tell?” She asked. “It’s not that strange to take some time to rest after such terrible fighting.”

Laslow looked at her and sighed. “There’s no use dancing around the matter. My lady, you know that even when the war is over, no Nohrian will have time for rest. If we are lucky then it would be the beginning of everything for the kingdom.”

“Yet it sounds like you three won’t be there for Nohr. Is this an arrangement with your lords and lady? Excuse my curiosity.”

“Ah, yes, it’s… an unavoidable circumstance. Our masters do know of it.”

“It sounds serious. Is there something we can help you with?” Takumi asked, not understanding anything but nonetheless affected by the graveness that had descend into the conversation.

“Oh no, you are very kind, my lord,” Laslow answered, not divulging any more information.

“Y-you are the best,” Odin leaned forward, hiccupping, “Lord Takumi, please take c-are of Lord Leo. He’s just s-so young-” He was stopped by an impatient Selena, who clasped one hand over his mouth and another over his eyes. She seemed to have experience in this field, as Odin was quickly reduced into a sleep log in her arms. Selena shook her head and let him slump down onto the table.

“Sappy slug, you should call yourself Odin Dank,” she exhaled. “You don’t have to worry, we have had a long time to prepare for what comes after. Besides, everything is secondary to this war right now.”

Takumi had a hundred of questions in his head, yet he couldn’t open his mouth under the strange pressure hanging in the air. Selena and Laslow seemed to have their guard up, while Hinoka felt oddly tense.

“I’d guess that your masters will be sorry to see you leave, you all seem very close to them,” Hinoka said. “Most of our retainers are not like that, even though we have been together for much longer than you do.”

“The Nohrian royal retainers are unlike most people,” Beruka suddenly spoke up, startling everyone. “We became retainers in unorthodox ways. You must have heard stories.”

Hinoka looked at the girl at length, then nodded, “I’ve heard yours.”

Takumi had not, but he knew Niles and Odin’s stories; they were indeed peculiar. “Why are you guys different then?” He asked.

“We as people are nothing new, but also nothing of retainer materials. It’s our masters who are different from most masters,” Beruka answered. “That they made retainers out of people like us is the difference.”

“If Prince Xander or Princess Camilla ask you to stay, would you?” Hinoka turned to Laslow and Selena.

The pair looked at each other, their faces scrunched up in misery. After a while, Laslow replied with a pained smile. “I don’t know how to describe this in the truest way. Before we dared to speak a word about out imminent departure, their displeasure was our greatest fear and their demurral our second. Had you asked us this question at that time, we would have said that we must do our best to persuade them to let us go. When we told them, however, they… they pretty much told us to live well, that they will always be our friends and our homes. After hearing something like that, I don’t think I’d have the strength to say no if they ever really ask.”

 _Unlike most masters indeed,_ Takumi thought.

“They must have noticed how bad we feel,” Selena sighed. “Lady Camilla joked about it. ‘As long as you don’t just up and gone,’ she said.”

“I have heard similar things from her. She doesn’t seem to be hung up on the past or afraid of the future,” Hinoka said.

“Her ladyship has a strong heart,” Selena replied with both pride and wistfulness.

“More like she is used to it,” Beruka said evenly. Upon receiving expectant looks from around the table, she added, “I have observed the Nohrian court life long before I came under her service. Abrupt arrivals and departures are inherent to it, one is lucky if they don’t turn ugly.”

Somethings in her words appeared to affect Hinoka deeply. Her face looked more and more serious, making Takumi slightly anxious. “You are saying that she has no other choice.”

“I guess I am. Instead of using Selena’s words, I would say that her ladyship is a good survivor.”

As Hinoka’s expression grew grim, Selena sighed. “What more should be demanded of her? To see that she can still care so much and express her feelings so freely is already the greatest boon I can ask for.”

Hinoka shook her head at that. After a moment of consideration, she said, “You are leading me to think that there aren’t many things around here actually worthy of her care, and if one day she feel too tired to continue, then that’s as it should be.”  

Selena paled at the remark; she opened her mouth to reply, but Beruka had spoken: “We all become more selfish and hardened to protect ourselves, but no one can do it with so much kindness and consideration for other people as Lady Camilla.”

Her comment neither negate nor support any point, it was a statement of painful truth. Silence fell around them once more. Takumi sent a concerned look toward Laslow but the soldier was looking down, seemingly lost in thought. Takumi himself was shaken by the conversation. For all of his confoundment toward Princess Camilla’s loving yet fiery way, he had always looked at her with awe. If anything, the paradox in her only made her seem larger than life in his eyes. It gave him a shivering sense of despondency at the thought that a person like her might one day simply… give up.

“I see your point, Lady Hinoka,” Laslow finally spoke up. “I can’t put my finger on it, but I have always sensed that Lady Camilla has to repress herself in some way.” He shrugged when Selena shot him an astonished look. “Her ladyship is similar to Lord Xander in that way. It is truly disheartening to watch how each day seems to be a battle for them, more so because it makes me feel useless. For a long time, I have hoped that something would lighten the load that they have to bear. I don’t know how it happened, but coming here to join Lady Corrin and your forces have chased a great shadow away for Lord Xander. Maybe with the conclusion of the war and the return of stability, her ladyship will also find relief.”

Hinoka stared at him, then briefly closed her eyes. Takumi wondered what was going on underneath the tense lines of her face. Was her insistent pursuit of the conversation related to the problem she had mentioned some time ago? For one more time, he realized how strange it was for him to see this matter trouble her so deeply. Hinoka and Princess Camilla had a world of their own that no outsider could understand, and that meant there was a face of his sister that Takumi could not fathom.  

“I am thinking it wrong again, leaning on reasons for argument,” Hinoka suddenly said. “What we say all make sense, but right now, I am sick of it.”

Everyone looked to her, surprised by the severe reaction.

As if tearing down a front that she had been struggling to keep up, her coolness morphed into animation. Color rose in her cheeks. “It makes me ill to think of how much Camilla has to placate herself in that way. Is it just me?” She put both of her fists on the table and stood up, her lips trembled as she spoke, her eyes were ablaze. “I have talked to Camilla and now I have talked to you, I have heard too many repeats of resignation. Must we just stand around and nod while she builds a fortress around her heart? I’m not in a place to say that anyone is wrong… I just want to- want to-”

Then she stopped speaking. Her brows drew tight, her lips pressed into a firm line, her eyes looked faraway, its bright gaze carried a startling wealth of emotion. “Hinoka?” Takumi rose up, sensing that his sister had just make a major decision. When she finally turned to him, he felt goosebumps rose at the sight of her faint yet certain smile.

“There’s one thing I want to do,” Hinoka said. “My heart has always been open to you, brother; please believe me when I say that I would like to tell you all of my feelings right now.” She stepped away from the table and turned. “But the proper order of things is that I must go to her first. Wish me luck.”

Takumi instinctively reach out a hand, then froze in speechless astonishment.  

In a moment, his sister had disappeared into the crowd.

\------

\------

Hinoka walked around the peripheral of the party area. She had a feeling that Camilla would favor somewhere not too crowded. It did surprise her a little, however, to see that Camilla was not sitting with any of her siblings or usual friends. In fact, she did not seem to be in the party at all. Hinoka looked around, seeking for inspiration. Probably not the lake or the forest – she hoped not, the options sounded too forlorn.

She looked up at the building where the royal families stayed. For privacy purpose, it was a little further from the common ground, sitting at the top of a slope. It looked as quiet as on any ordinary night. All three floors were dark, the only lights on were the two small ones next to the two front doors. No sound from the current celebrations could reach it. A restful place.

As Hinoka walked across the grass, sounds receded behind her, the light and warmth of bonfires soon gave place to cool shadow. The sounds of insects and the chilly wind that brushed her cheeks became the world around, making her calm and focused. Calm enough to think carefully about what she was about to do, focused enough to proceed with clear purpose when she had ascertained that she was not having second thought. Her body grew warmer with anticipation.

Not knowing whether it would be good or ridiculous to knock on the front door, she opened it and walked in without announcing herself. There, in the mostly dark living room, she found Camilla. Her friend had forgone the comfortable sofa and chose to sit at the writing desk. The chair was turned side way, as if Camilla had been looking through the window to pocket of light that was the party crowd, watching the bonfires from the furthest position possible in the room. A small lamp on the desk was the only light source around; looking from the front door, its glow was mostly hidden behind Camilla’s back.

Reasonably, it was too dark for Camilla to recognize who had come in until they were right in front of each other. She tilted her head up to look at Hinoka, her lips parted in quiet surprise. It was then that Hinoka decided she would not make a long introduction. She leaned down and placed a hand on the chair’s back rest, as if to make sure that Camilla would not be able to run away.

“I have been thinking. We should be together,” she said softly.

She waited for a reaction from Camilla before continuing. It was a rapid blink, then a slower one. Hinoka tried to keep her voice steady. “If you look around and see yourself alone in the coming of farewells, then I want you to know that I would like to stay by your side. If you doubt that I can then I will try until you believe. If you doubt that I am willing then I will work until I can prove myself.”

Hinoka maintained her gaze and looked closely at Camilla’s face, wondering if she should say everything again. She had come in and started talking so suddenly. But as Camilla let silence stretched between them, Hinoka knew that every word was heard. Camilla’s face was frozen in a stunned expression, only her eyes were alive, staring hard into Hinoka’s as if seeking for the truth. Hinoka started to feel a flush climbing up her nape, but her mind remained clear.

Finally, Camilla looked down and away, to the shadow surrounding them. “What happened? Why are you suddenly making such a… statement of intent?” Her voice was small and tentative.

“I learned about Selena’s plan after the war and I-”

“You are concerned about I my feelings?” Camilla cut in. “Oh Hinoka, what is another person’s leaving to all that is already changing around here?” She chuckled lowly. “Nor am I suffering some kind of illness that needs curing by companionship.”

“That is not what I mean,” Hinoka swallowed hard. “I want you to understand that I would like to be with you, if you would allow it. I have not chained myself to ambitions or duties. I can choose my priority and it is you. I hope to make this clear, because although I’d never think that you are ill, I know you are feeling uneased with trepidation. I don’t dare to propose an improvement, this is a- a promise.”

She wanted to speak of how much she feared seeing Camilla lonely, but she knew it would be wrong in this moment. She also wanted to reach out and touch, but she reigned back the impulse. Camilla’s eyes looking at her were doubtful and misty, more guarded yet more vulnerable than even the time when she had let Hinoka into her darkest thoughts.

“My talk with Selena may have prompted me to act, but my decision is not reactional. I have simply realized that there is no better time to tell you what I think,” Hinoka confessed. “If you have your own dream of peace, if you want to travel the world, if you want to carve a new life for yourself, I really want to be a part of your choice, Camilla. When I speak of being together, I mean it as something that is not circumstantial. It is our choice, we can nurture and protect it, I promise so.”

It was presumptuous of her to say that they should be together, wasn’t it? Except that it was the singular thought in her mind. A giddy belief that Camilla would maybe accept her was making Hinoka say words that sounded more confident than she really felt. She realized that her own want was driving her, but she couldn’t help it. If Camilla dismiss her right now, she wouldn’t know what to do with herself.

What Camilla said was this: “It all sounds so good that I am scared to find out if you are only humoring me. Can… Can you imagine living a life that revolve around one person?”

Hinoka paused for a moment to think. “If you are looking for a logical answer, it depends on the person. In our case, to be with you is actually me getting my way, that means my life with you would be revolving around both of us.”

“How can you be so convinced about something like sentiments?”

“You should know how stubborn I was about Corrin.”

“This is not the same.”

“But it’s the same me. Besides, I think you definitely know me like no one else can, and I hope that I have been a decently understanding friend to you.” The last words earned her a huff from Camilla.

“I’m possessive. Obsessive,” Camilla exaggerated.

“Well, it’s good that I’m not. I’m only preoccupied with you.”

“We are princesses of two different kingdoms.”

“Those are not the distances you are afraid of,” Hinoka chuckled.

“I can’t imagine you would be happy leaving your duties,” the topic looped.

“To be honest, I can. Wouldn’t that be enough?”

“You sound so full of confidence, I feel like I was once like you.”

“You don’t have to pressure yourself to become anyone, even your old self.”

“I just don’t understand why, Hinoka.” Camilla finally lost the will to argue.

Hinoka smiled. The aimless circle of questions had given her hope to prevail. “I am simple minded like this, Camilla: All things considered, I want to bring you happiness, it is also the most important thing I want for myself. I want to see you enjoy life surrounded by people who adore you, so I am trying to introduce myself as one of them. Although, I must say, there might be a certain spot that I’d like be the sole occupant of...”

Camilla stared at her for a long moment. “…Why does that sound like an afterthought?” She teased, but her voice was weak.

“Will you let me speak of love?” Hinoka gently asked.

And Camilla started to laugh, lightly and haltingly, almost as if choking up. Slowly, she leaned forward, resting her head against Hinoka’s chest. Her fine hair gently draped over Hinoka’s arms, her sweet scent tickled Hinoka’s nose.

“Camilla, Camilla” Hinoka softly lulled.

“Yes, Hinoka. Yes.” Camilla said, still laughing, still slightly choking. “I don’t know what I’m saying yes to anymore. I don’t care.” She hugged Hinoka. “This is too much of a gift and I can’t think. The moment you walked in through the door, I have surrendered.”

Hinoka couldn’t help but chuckle along, heart filled with joy. She wrapped her arms around Camilla and felt Camilla exhaling. She relished the weight of Camilla pressing against her chest, the little sighs that Camilla let out as she relaxed. Blissful warmth spread throughout her body, and she leaned down to kiss silky lilac hair, embracing her beloved with all that she had.

\-----

\-----

The first person Xander seek out when he came back was Camilla, this was because the first person he met upon returning was a certain young Hoshidan prince.

He found her sitting on the root of a big tree, working on an embroidery. It struck him that he had not seen her doing this favourite pastime for a few weeks now. He watched her peaceful face for some time before approaching.

“I have returned,” he smiled when she looked up.

“Just as you have promised that you would try to,” Camilla said with a flick of dark humor. “How were things?”

“Exciting, in a sense. Nyx terrified the mages; Charlotte terrified the rest of the people who should be terrified. But I believe that the festivities of my trip were nothing compared to those I have missed.”

“Indeed,” Camilla replied simply.

“Well, I’m glad that you all had a good time. I ran into Prince Takumi when I came back just now; he looked rather pale so I asked after him.” Xander looked down with amusement. “He told me that he just received some kind of shocking news from Princess Hinoka.”

“Aha?” His sister gave a small smile.

“I said that I hoped it was not of the bad kind. He said that no, it was just of the big kind.”

Camilla huffed out a laugh and stood up. “That pure child.”

Smiling, Xander took another step towards the her, and she readily opened her arms to receive his hug, tightening them around him to show her appreciation. The gesture moved him greatly. In the end, their embrace lasted longer than it usually did.

“I’m very glad, Camilla, my dear sister,” Xander said as he leaned back to look at Camilla’s face, his hands still held her forearms. “I try to provide my siblings with reassurance, but when it comes to happiness, I fear that I am incompetent. Now it brings me joy to see that you have found a companion.  I am sure that Princess Hinoka is a great person; but more than that, I… I know you would never commit to anyone unless you deeply love them and see a future together.”

This time, it was Camilla who leaned forward to hug him. Letting out a content sigh, she murmured: “You don’t know it, yet sometimes you have the exact words that I need.”

“All I can give you are words,” Xander patted her back. “To be honest,” he turned more serious, “I have noticed earlier that something has been upsetting you. Compared to how happy you look right now, I am even surer of how bad it was-”

“Shush,” Camilla placed a finger on his lips. “There’s no need for you to worry anymore.”

He looked at her with doubt.

“My perspective has slightly changed and I am more optimistic. If we win this war, I will find a way. There, that’s the whole truth,” she said.

It was hardly an explanation, but Xander understood that she had put in just enough effort to make him to drop the topic. “Are you sure?” he asked. “If… If I am to spell it out, I still think that you- ” _still hold a feeling akin to resentment, I don’t even know toward what._  

Camilla only shook her head. “I am absolutely sure. Please don’t make me pour my heart out again.”

Xander continued to observe her, until she raised an eyebrow at him. Sighing inwardly at his own social ineptitude, he decided to let go and tried to appear more relaxed. “Again? Then I must thank Princess Hinoka in person.”

“I’ll do it myself,” Camilla smiled. She pulled him up, linked their arms and started directing him to take a walk with her. “Now, let’s go find Leo. You must tell us everything about your trip.”

Xander gladly obliged.

\---------

\---------

It took Ryoma some time to realize that he was just wasting his time away in the afternoon. Sure, he did finish his routine activities and trained with both Takumi and Hinoka, but his mind was not focused. Furthermore, he avoided the royal living quarter. Everything he did, everywhere he wandered, he chose to be far from the building, because he believed he would feel disappointed to learn that Xander was not there either, that his friend was not back in camp yet. What place would be left for him to check then? To hold onto the childish hope that he would accidentally cross path with Xander if he try his luck at the next destination in this fort? He knew he was being throughoutly irrational, but he couldn’t help it.

It was while mocking himself for this silliness that he arrived at the mess hall. It was late in the afternoon; the cooking had started but only people who had evening duty were there to have meal. Ryoma smiled when he saw many content faces; it was Mozu’s stew night.

When he came over to the serving counter with the intention to praise the girl, he noticed that she was chatting animatedly with someone he did not recognize.

Ryoma knew who he had seen around. If he didn’t remember someone by name or face, he would at least know them by their stance or silhouette. He had good memory; even though the girl standing in front of Mozu had her back to him, he was certain that he had never met her.

Mozu noticed him first. Her eyes widened and she quickly greeted him, causing the girl to turn around. Ryoma was right, he did not know her at all. He recognized some familiar traits on her face, however, and with the aid of her dressing style and her young age, something clicked in his mind

“You must be… Flora,” he said.

She stared at him in surprise, then quickly gathered herself and bowed. “Lord Ryoma.”

“Have you just arrived?” Ryoma asked. “Did you return with Prince Xander?”

“Yes, my lord. The Ice Tribe is finally in safety and Lord Xander has allowed me the choice to come here if I wish. I would like nothing more than to be of help to the army.”

“Your sister must be very pleased.”

The girl smiled. “Yes, yes. She started to cry the moment she saw me. I’m very glad to be here.”

“I am too,” Mozu interjected. Her cheeks tinted pink when the attention turned to her. “It was a big surprise for me when I saw Flora just now. We have met many years before.”

“Did you?” Ryoma grinned broadly. He looked from Mozu to Flora, who responded with a startled and reluctant look. This reaction startled Ryoma in turn. He was suddenly reminded that she was still a Nohrian who had had no friendly contact with Hoshidan people in recent time.

“Indeed, my lord,” Mozu said. “I got lost on the mountain when I was searching for some herbs for my mo- my late mother. Flora helped me back then. She even spent a night on the mountain with me because I was too far from home to make it back before sunset.”

“We didn’t even know that one of us was Hoshidan and the other a Nohrian,” Flora chuckled lightly.

“And that’s how our people should feel toward each other, not caring where one was born or raised,” Ryoma said. “We will work toward it.”

Flora’s expression turned warmer. “Thank you for saying so, my lord.”

Next to her, Mozu nodded heartily. “I learned more about Nohr later and guessed Flora’s homeland. It didn’t change the fact that she was my savior. I thought it was a miracle, what with the Ice Tribe living so far away from the border, yet Flora was there on the mountain that day and knew exactly what I needed to do. I still remember how she appeared in my desperate moment, everything she did to help me and every word she said to soothe my distraught. Oh she was so composed, so resourceful, so elegant…”

Flora blushed at the compliments. “I- I thought of you often as well. You were young yet already knowledgeable about medicinal plants. A-and, your cooking was heavenly, even though I could only taste it for one meal. The moment I stepped into this hall, I thought I was hallucinating because the smell of the food carried me straight back to that day.”

Mozu’s happiness blossomed so prettily on her face that Ryoma chuckled. “Mozu is quite legendary for her cooking. I have heard from pretty much everyone that her foods carry the tastes of home, even though people in this army come from all over the continent. I’d say that it’s on par with magic.”

Mozu faintly protested that he was exaggerating.

Flora’s smile became broader. “Lord Xander told me so as well. He insisted that I come early to get food, before is a lot of competitio- Wait!” She suddenly exclaimed, her eyes widened with a frantic look. “His lordship also asked me not to tell you that. Please don’t let him know!”

Before Ryoma could understand what was going on, Mozu had already started speaking. “You don’t have to worry,” she said with exasperation. “He can’t fault you if you tell.” She wrinkled her nose a little, just enough not to be disrespectful. “I don’t know. His lordship is unreasonable like that. He does a lot of nice things but just blatantly denies them. He once told a lot of people to come taste my food out of kindness for me, then when I asked him if it was his doing, please excuse my language, he lied right through his teeth.”      

Her irreverent comment startled a string of laughter out of Ryoma. “You have no idea,” he said, shaking his head as too many relatable memories helped him construct a clear image of Xander’s expression. He heard a barely suppressed giggle from Flora; a light of camaraderie seemed to shine in her eyes as she looked at him.

“Perhaps you can convince him to lose that habit, my lord,” Mozu said daringly. “Please tell his lordship that he doesn’t have a reputation of being scary to uphold anymore. It has turned to dust quite a while ago and it’s not coming back.”

“I will deliver your wish should the chance arise,” Ryoma laughed. “But personally, I think he needn’t to change. I appreciate him as he is.”

The conversation left Ryoma in excellent mood. He hurried back to their living quarter, almost skipped two steps at once as he climbed the stairs. He could barely contain his exciment when he saw that the door to Xander’s room was open.

The sight he caught inside did make him stop for a moment at the entrance, however. Xander was sitting at his writing desk, his back turned toward the door. Next to him, the door to the balcony was open and a man was laying on the floor, with his legs stretching across the threshold to the balcony outside. He was humming absentmindedly, one of his arm was placed over his forehead, obscuring his face to Ryoma. The upper half of his body was in the cool shade of the room; from his abdomen down, he was bathed in the warm afternoon sunlight.

On his stomach, in the most comfortable position, lay a purring black cat.

The scene was so peculiar that Ryoma had to step inside the room immediately after he knocked, he needed to make sure that he was not seeing things. “Laslow?” He asked in astonishment as he identified the person on the floor.

Both master and retainer jumped at the successive sounds. “Ryoma,” Xander greeted him with a pleasant smile.

Down on the floor, Laslow was apparently in a difficult postion. He babbled some formal greetings mixed with apologies for his rudeness. He gestured his head as if making an attempt to sit up, but his face showed great reluctance toward rousing the cat.

“Never mind me,” Ryoma chuckled and waved a hand. “Is this an old friend?”

“So old that she thinks she can get away with sneaking into Charlotte’s bag,” Xander shook his head. “She’s two.”

“What’s the name?”

“Mun. If you would like to comment about dull naming, please try to think of five kitten names at once.”

“I’m not say anything,” Ryoma smiled. Xander was clearly relaxed; the trip must have been fruitful. He sat down on the chair next to the desk. His eyes were drawn to Xander’s hand as it guided the pen quickly and elegantly across the unlined notebook page. It was like seeing mastery in action. Not too long ago, Ryoma had witness Xander’s first time using chopsticks, which had turned out to be surprisingly easy. He had quietly wondered about it, now he could guess the answer.

“I ran into Flora earlier. Are you pleased with the trip?” He asked when Xander had finished.

“There’s not much to be pleased about yet, but I got clarification,” Xander smiled tightly. “My father is not ruling. Leo and I might have been the very last people to see him. I don’t think he ever learnt of my order to halt Nohrian aggressions. I walked into the king’s office unquestioned and found the reports regarding that order from other generals still unopened on the desk.” Ryoma could hear worry laced in his voice as he continued. “How very convenient this all is for us. I hope that he is not in danger… or involved in a more monstrous scheme than he already has. I don’t know what I should fear more.”

Ryoma sighed.

“I was in Cheve yesterday,” Xander continued. “In summary, I think we can rest our mind about this matter for now. Recent events have left them shaken and watchful. If anything, our alliance and my arrival have given them more reasons to stay conservative at the moment. They have their demands, which I find somewhat tricky but workable. There are things that are long due to them, after all; no one really wants another uprising. I assured them that the relationship between Nohr and Cheve will not be the same after Nohr and Hoshido resolve our differences.”

Ryoma nodded. To the outside world, the two kingdoms were still in the fragile stage of working an unclear truce. No one knew they were fighting a war in Valla. Regardless of the actual reason, the continent was holding its breath for the outcomes of Nohr and Hoshido dealings. “They did not give you much difficulty then?”

“Not as much as they could have. If there is anything we should fear, I believe we won’t learn about it until negotiation starts, after peace has been restored all around.” Xander paused for a moment, then took a deep breath before continuing, “About the Fourth Company, they sent a representative to meet me. She made no comment on Nohr, but was willing to listen to my words about Lady Scarlet’s journey from when she left Nestra until… here. The representative received your letter and said that should the Company wish to respond, they will send the reply through the same route they had been using with you. Our exchange was rather cold; but I guess that was as well as could be, seeing that we were enemies not long ago. At least we never mentioned the fighting, and she asked a few things about our alliance too.”

“You have my immense gratitude,” Ryoma quickly said to reassure Xander. “You have accomplished much more that I could hope for. I wished I could be there in person.”

“I told them as much,” Xander answered him with a smile.  Then he lowered his voice, “There was one visit that I decided to make at the last minute.” He hesitated. “I went to see the Duke of Nestra before I returned.”

It took Ryoma a moment to understand these words. “Xander!” He exclaimed. A startled meow sounded near his feet.

“I know, I know,” Xander raised his hands, “I’m sorry that I did it without your input-”

“I am not talking about that. Did you even sleep?!”

Xander stared back in surprise. “Of- of course?”

“Really? Properly?”

For some reason, Xander’s gaze flicked to the side. Ryoma followed it and found Laslow looking back at his master intently.

The silence was telling.

“My lord!” Laslow cried out. “You said differently when I asked!”

“I apologize, Laslow.” Xander pinched the bridge of his nose.  

“We only took our eyes off you for two days and you are already skipping sleep. How can you do this to us? Just wait until I tell Peri and make her cry all over your important documents!"

Xander looked alarmed. “I will lock you in this room with her if she does, so please don’t do that,” he said. “And don’t think I have forgiven you for your conduct at the wedding last night. You flirted with your _newly-wedded_ comrades-”

“That- That’s different!” Laslow quickly threw a glance at Ryoma. “At least I honestly admitted doing it. You can’t blackmail me with that. Lord Ryoma, you have to be our referee!” 

Ryoma was busy shaking with laughter.

Xander dragged a palm over his eyes. “I’m really sorry, my friend.”

“Please don’t use the friend card with me.” Laslow faked a dramatic sob as he saw himself out, taking the confused cat with him.

Ryoma had to hold onto the desk to dial down his laughs. Xander sent him a futile withering glance. “You needn’t enjoy this so much,” he sighed. “My retainers fuss over strange things, I didn’t want them to worry. I just couldn’t bring myself to be dishonest with you.”

“I’d love to take your side but I know that wouldn’t be right,” Ryoma chuckled. “I do feel guilty whenever I burn the midnight oil.”

“I did sleep, and I came back early to make sure that I would have time for proper rest,” Xander replied, sighing once more. “Well, about Nestra…”

“How was it? Were you safe?”

“…You really don’t mind that I decided everything by myself?”

“You have the executive power. Thank you for thinking of doing this.” Ryoma said airily.

Xander huffed out a laugh. “All right. I would say Nestra has turn defensive, which is very good for us. The Duke admitted to cutting a deal with Nohr, though I think he didn’t divulge every detail to me. I hope that it was only out of shame on his part, not because there’s a nasty surprise still waiting for us.”

“Was he particularly obstructive?”

“I’m not sure. He has always seemed quite haughty; pressure just makes him put his façade up higher. I tried several tactics to no avail. I guess he doesn’t have that much respect for me or the direction we are heading, compared to, say, the bloody and triumphant future that he had envisioned with the war between Nohr and Hoshido,” Xander said drily. “At least he doesn’t seem eager to have another battle break out in his territory again. I take it as a positive sign that he is neither too far gone nor possessed by Anankos, he probably was just a pawn in the deal.”

“Did he say anything about the Patrician?”

“Not voluntarily. I asked; he was vague about it. He denounced her at first. When I told him that we are aware of his past support for her, he tried to dismiss their connection and refused to recognize that what she is doing as a threat to his rule.”

“Swift inconsistency. That’s interesting,” Ryoma remarked.

“That man is shrewd in an unpleasant way,” Xander shook his head. Then he suddenly grinned, the sparkle in his eyes made Ryoma’s heart skip a beat. “I think it means that we are holding an advantage though. You might be right to guess that the Patrician is not exactly a rebel. The Duke tried to feign disinterest in convincing her to return to Nestra. In his words: ‘There is nothing that can be done for that wayward child anymore, even if she is shaming herself and all of Nestra by imposing on Hoshido’s hospitality.’” Ryoma clicked his tongue at the twisted language, making Xander smile. “I told him that there’s no need to be so pessimistic, for if she continues to stay, he should meet her soon at your coronation in spring and the four of us can talk. I could see his vein popped upon hearing that.”

Ryoma bursted out laughing. The emphasis that the two kingdoms had banded tightly together, the implication that they were in complete control of the situation, the warning that changes would soon hit the continent under the bidding of new rulers, paired with Xander’s cool delivery – how he wished he could have witness everything. “So how desperate is he actually for her to return to Nestra, do you think?” he asked.

“Quite, I’d guess. I’m sure he would never call her ‘important’, because that would effectively make her a hostage in your hand. However, he told me he would work with the opposition group promptly and get her out of your hair as soon as possible.”

“I will be pleased if he does, that would make Nestra the second territory to be in adequate stability after this mess of a war,” Ryoma said. As both Mokushu and Izumo had had to elect new rulers in a rush, the future remained less certain for them than Nestra or Cheve. “A spring coronation, you said? That’s a big deadline you set for me,” he jested.

“Let’s say, a couple of week to end this war. A month to make you some new outfits. Another for you to get the garden in order and fix the guest rooms. I think you’ll even be early,” Xander chuckled.

“It’s not possible unless everyone in Nohr become Hoshidan artisan tonight. Our customs and rituals require an obscene amount of craft work,” Ryoma shook his head. “But I like the other date that you’ve just set. Two weeks, that would be a good time for this to be over.”

Xander smiled.

“We will be done with fighting, then Hoshido can focus on helping Nohr,” Ryoma said. To any other person, it would have been a pretentious thing to say. To Xander, he had no qualms.

In fact, Xander had no direct response to these words. Instead, he took out a pouch from his breast pocket and produced Ryoma’s inro. “I must thank you for your help,” he said. “I couldn’t have secured safety for the Ice Tribe so quickly without this.”

“Won’t you keep it for now?” Ryoma couldn’t help feeling a little disappointed.

“I know how much you care for our people, that is enough.” Xander gently took his hand and placed the inro into his palm. Ryoma reluctantly closed his fingers around it. He didn’t have an excuse to ask Xander to keep it anymore. He wished he didn’t need to have an excuse, or to use an item such as this to help Xander.

“Ah,” Xander let out a soft sound next to him, pulling Ryoma back to the present. “I would like to ask you for another favor, however,” he said.

From a tiny side pocket of the pouch, Xander took out something small, fitting between the tips of his finger like a coin. He carefully put it down on the desk, then stood up and walked to the bedside table to get something from the drawer

Ryoma stared at the new item on the desk - it was a small portrait of Queen Arete. He had not met the queen, did not remember her from official portraits or the battle they fought the other day, but he recognized the familiar traits on her face. The circumstance also left little to question.

When Xander returned, his hand held a silver locket. Despite having guessed beforehand, Ryoma still felt a shiver when he saw the portraits it held: King Garon, Queen Katerina.

With the help of his pocket knife, Xander removed the portraits of his parents. He worked methodically, his face was calm. Ryoma quietly looked at the two paintings as they lay naked on the desk. The royal couple were young and beautiful, there was no better word. Within each tiny frame, the artist had taken care to polish every single detail, until the eyes were bright like stars and the faces shone with an ethereal glow. It was strange to gaze at them like this, to see how they showed so much promise and _glory_ for Nohr, then be reminded that it’s all in the past. Now, on Xander’s handsome face, an ever-present frown was their legacy.

The frames settled back into the locket with small clicks, one of them now held Queen Arete’s portrait. Xander presented the open locket for Ryoma to see. “I found it near my father’s chamber a few years ago. The original locket was damaged beyond repair. I could only save the painting,” he said. “Would you mind giving it to Azura? I think she may like it.”

 _To help her stay strong, should she have to face a ghost._ Ryoma felt his heart clenched. He hesitated before taking the locket into his palm. “She would. Shouldn’t you give it to her in person though?” He looked into Xander’s eyes.

“I… don’t want her to think that she is being pressured into feeling a certain way.”

“What if she feels more encouraged by a bolder show of stance?”

“Aren’t you the bolder one?” Xander smiled wryly.

“Xander.”

Xander ducked his head in a casual apology, the gesture immediately made Ryoma feel a little guilty. He sighed. “You know, just today I was defending your secretive way of being a samaritan. I will do this if you insist, as long as you remember that your affection is always welcome to your family. That said, would you like to go to the mess hall now? We saved some of the wedding wine for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- I’m sorry I botched Odin :-$. Also, magic travel abuse, yay! I’m super lazy, btw. I chose ‘Mun’ because it literally means ‘black cat’ : )).  
> What do you imagine of the Duke of Nestra and Lady Varenil? I’m poking at ideas for the part where we meet them xD  
> \- On another note, life has been weird and I don't even know if my judgment has been off about... stuffs. If you see something weird in the story, please poke me =))


	7. Chapter 7

The wildness of the Gyges castle ground was not different from what the army had encountered from the chasm till then. The terrain was rough, with many ridges and mounts, surprise grottos and abrupt cliffs, along with a large number of floating isles. It was clear that this aesthetic was deliberately chosen, as the signs of cultivation were also subdued – little hidden rock bridges, scattered pavilions, narrow pathways. It was greatly unfortunate that no one in the army could appreciate this exotic beauty. For a foreign force, the place was too much of a treacherous battleground. Even a day of scouting beforehand could not provide much confidence.

When the war council looked at the draft map of small isles connected by drifting bridges, it was clear to them that the next battle would unfold there, where they could easily be split up and ambushed. One the one hand, this knowledge drove tension high in the army; one the other, troop morale was better than ever. Even Azura no longer seemed visibly torn about the imminent face off against what could be the spirit of Queen Arete.

What she showed when the confrontation finally happened, Xander thought, was admirable bravery. Although she still looked deeply troubled, her voice was firm. The sight made him angry and sad, for he knew what it was like to threaten death to someone he had once cherished. He hoped that Anankos was the only one to blame for this, the only wicked manipulator all along. Somehow, the thought that Anankos was violating Queen Arete’s rest and Azura’s memories of her loving mother was still less evil than the possibility that it had warped Arete the same way it did King Garon.

Their army moved forward with watchful eyes and stayed as close together as possible. Vallite troops took to appearing in small scattered groups, playing on the element of surprise. Xander’s mind was straining on suspicions when several calls from other people drew his attention to the sky.

A lone wyvern rider was heading straight toward them, showing no intent to employ strategy or any of the natural obstacles for cover. They perched on top of a large boulder, alone and unmoving, axe brandished. It was an insult pronounced as loudly as conceivable.

In the blink of an eye, clouds moved across the sky, and brilliant sunlight casted clear the face of the challenger.

Gasps of horror broke out around them. “How DARE it?!” Camilla hissed. Xander was barely able to register the fury in her voice. His own mind was frozen in shock. Bile had risen in his throat before his mind could even reach the word to describe Sc- what was before them. Xander had seen enough corpses to know exactly what that pallid color indicated.

A chilling wave suddenly washed around them. Xander turned to see Ryoma at the eye of the storm. Without further thought, he immediately made his way toward Ryoma. The air crackled with energy, full of pressure and hair-raising rumbles. Elise was braving the intimidation from her partner with sheer stubbornness, pleading Ryoma to calm down while she herself turned pale and breathless.  

“Ryoma!” Xander shouted. He jumped down from his horse and grabbed Ryoma’s vambrace, searching for the right tone to call his friend back. “What do you need?”  _ He must not take this as personal responsibilty. _

Ryoma had tensed up like an immovable mountain, his jaw clenched tightly. The moment seemed to stretch forever, until he slightly turned to Xander with eyes ablaze.

“What. Do. You. Need?” Xander said it like a command, hoping that he sounded forceful enough.  _ Fight the rage, Ryoma! _

“Takumi!” Ryoma finally barked, his voice thunderous. He softened his tone to apologize to Elise, but his expression did not ease.

Prince Takumi promptly ordered his group to move up. Camilla took off from the ground and hovered just behind him. “I’ll be right where you need me,” she bellowed with a dark expression. Looking down at Ryoma, she asked: “If she draws near, would you like to be the one to do it?”

Ryoma seemed to consider it for a moment. “Do what is right,” he replied in a heavy tone.

Xander stepped away, a little forward so that Ryoma could still catch him out of the corner of the eye. They both looked up, straining their eyes at the sight of the creature. The marks of blood were still fresh on the armor, as if Scarlet had simply stood up from her injuries at the chasm and turned around to confront them. Xander had seen those blood marks dried when they removed the armor to bury Scarlet with her lances and shield. He himself had carefully wrapped up that very set of armor and carried it back to Cheve, where Scarlet’s spirit would rest for eternity in the heart of her motherland. If he had been unsure when he faced the ghost of Queen Arete, in this moment, he had come to the same thought as his sister:  _ How dare you, Anankos! _

In the end, it was never about fighting. Scarlet had been pushed out into the battlefield simply to torture their heart. Her fighting style had always been straight-forward, acting alone like this left her no chance against their forces. As Prince Takumi and Camilla approached with caution, she ignored the prince on the ground and went straight for Camilla, leaving herself exposed to the most fatal attacks.  Immersed in the axe battle, she didn’t even care that the rest of the army was closing in. It was terrible to watch; the psychological toll was painfully visible on Prince Takumi’s face.

Just when Xander felt that Ryoma would lose his composure once more, Prince Takumi let go of his arrow. The shot torn through the wyvern and its master like a gale, taking them down at once. There was a brief cry from the animal, then a cloud of purple dust and crashing sounds when it fell.

Then complete silence.

The army stood still, watching, until Camilla emerged from behind the range of tree and rocks that were blocking the view. She flew back to them and nodded quickly. Raising her voice, she spoke to everyone: “The enemy is cunning, be very careful. Proceed in tight groups and stay on high alert. The terrain is already working to separate us from each other.”

She made eye contacts to make sure that her words had been properly received by all group leaders, then flew back to where the royalties were gathering.

“She said thank you,” she said in a low voice, directed at Corrin and Ryoma.

Corrin blinked and turned her face away, her lips quivered. Ryoma… Ryoma just hung his head. “Let’s continue the march,” he said then walked back to position.

Xander glanced to where Princess Hinoka was waiting for him with their group.

“I will look after him, please don’t worry,” Elise whispered to him before hurrying after Ryoma. A few steps away, Azura turned her head to send him a reassuring look as she paced herself by Corrin.

Not wholly convinced, Xander marched on with an unsettled feeling. He couldn’t deny that the enemy had achieved something by sending Scarlet out to face them. His head started to hurt with the tension. As he and Hinoka led the vanguard, it became clear to him how much of a deadly hide-and-seek this battle was. He knew that the battlefield was technically small, scouting report had made that clear, not to mention that they could detect Arete’s powerful presence from not far away. But terrain was their biggest enemy; everything around here looked like it could be their downfall. Turn one corner, and suddenly the rest of the army seemed to be out of sight.

There were the sliding bridges that divided them up, the ruins that might or might not harbor secret passages, the rock mounts that their flyers needed to rise above to observe… Or like the large rock of irregular shape to the left side ahead of them, a thing that made Xander raise his hand for the third time in the last half hour, signaling his group to gather tighter and wait for other troops to catch-

Too late.

“Ambush!” Princess Hinoka suddenly roared from high above, her lance whirled in the air. The air squad jerked back, trying to descend back to behind the rock as arrows flew up around it.  Xander snapped out thought and shot into full stride toward to the side of the rock, looking out for signs of the enemies. He blindly swung attacks into the densely grown forest, taking down obstacles as well as anything that looked suspicious. Everything in the air above was happening too slowly for his liking.

And before Hinoka could fully retreat, two arrows had pierced her pegasus.

It let out an unearthly sound and plunged like a boulder to the other side of the rock, bringing its master along. Xander wanted to curse. He rode around the rock and rounded his horse to stand in front of the bush where enemy attacks were directing toward, hoping to make himself into a physical wall. The ground was too overgrown for him to see where Hinoka was, but he had seen the pegasus falling too close to the rock, severely limiting her ability to jump off and escape from being crushed by her own mount. She might be trapped with fatal injuries and no means to defend.

There were roughly two dozen enemies that he could spot. Being on horseback gave him a superior vantage point but also high visibility; the Vallites quickly turned their attacks toward him. It was somewhat helpful to his purpose but made nothing easier. Even with every blow accurate and fatal, he could only make one attack for every three dodges, too slow in reducing the number of enemies to guarantee himself survival.  _ Just five minutes, our soldiers are right behind,  _ he thought. He could only wish that luck was on his side.

It was not. Just as Xander saw the tip of an arrow slipped under the edge of his blade, the ground rocked under him. His horse had been hit on a fore leg. The mare brayed and collapsed down on her front knees, almost tipping to the side and throwing him forward. He rolled off her barely in time. “Stay down, Ishtar,” he commanded urgently. Ever the loyal girl, she whimpered but stayed in place, even as Xander gritted his teeth and used her as his own shield.

_ How can they keep sprouting?!  _ There were only so many bushes, so many trees and rocks in front of him, yet the attacks kept coming. Vallite soldiers were like war machines, there was no comradeship among them or any sense of self-preservation beyond serving efficiency. Each and every one acted with murder intent to the last moment they were corporeal. Xander fought until red and black glows crept up around his vision, all he knew was to kill and block. His mind could still notice some arrows and magic that had started to shoot out from behind him toward the enemies, but it no longer deciphered the sounds around. The smell of sulphur and scorched earth filled his nose.

Then he saw the enemies started to stand up from their hiding places, coming out to confront him directly. Some wore a vicious grin on their lips - now that he was more vulnerable, they were simply going to overwhelm him.

They might have, had it been a lesser man facing them.

Xander charged forward and went full offensive, knowing it was his only chance. He guessed more than saw his kills; his own body gave only a detached acknowledgment for each injury that shook but could not stop him. His eyes zeroed onto the last two opponents. As the deathly attack left the tip of Siegfried, Xander looked straight at the face of its target. In a terribly disturbing gesture, the Vallite’s mouth twitched into a mocking kiss toward him, the seal of Fimbulvetr was already glaring bright around her.

Both sides knew that he would not be able to dodge the attack. It hit Xander like a bull, knocking him out of breath and gripped him in suffocating flame. The circlet burned up around his head, its protective magic clashed harshly with the direct assault. He thrusted his blade into the ground and panted heavily, feeling as if dense lava was coursing up and down his throat. Then the high neighs of Ishtar suddenly rose above the loud thumps in his ears, piercing through his mushy hearing. He blinked and blinked, to see that the last Vallite had taken the place of her perished comrade, tome raised high.

He heaved Siegfried from the ground, putting all of himself into the last swing. His frame shook with the effort, his arms were numb, but he knew he was killing again. Across from him, the Vallite stared at death squarely, the wicked glows in those empty holes seemed to brighten with victorious arrogance.

The casted spell took full shape.  _ Ginnungagap _ .

Xander watched it came for him. Felt it brought the sky down on him. 

_ I will live. _

_ I will live. _

For a moment, it fell as if he was ripped out of his own body then yanked back. The circlet was searing. Loud incessant rings echoed in Xander’s ears, shaking all of his senses; bursts of blinding light exploded under his eyelids along with a throbbing pain deep in the sockets; hot fluid trickled from the corners of the eyes. He squeezed the eyes shut, tilted his head up while hoping that it was only tears running down his cheeks. If he could muster more strength, he would have parted his lips to taste it and see what it was. Instead, he buckled his knees, let himself fall back, and waited for a long while until a heavy shock signaled that he had landed on the ground.

Everything felt scorching, Xander wasn’t sure if he was still breathing or not. His brain commanded him to search for his concoction, but he couldn’t tell if the movements of his hand was real or imagined. All he knew was that he kept reaching and reaching, yet no matter how much he tried, his fingers could never seem to find it-

Then a hot, tingling sensation washed down from his face to his body. Xander wanted to groan, but all his body could do was tense up immensely. His heart almost stopped. In thought, however, he was overjoyed to feel the pain. Someone was ministering healing potion for him.

_ I can still sense. Still think. _

The rings and throbs seemed to spread and reverberated forever, until they finally transformed into an undecipherable susurration of human voice surrounding him. The fog was clearing.

With time, a soft voice singled out as being right in front of his face, even though he still couldn’t recognize the words. The person said something, then the brightness of the light in his eyes reduced. What followed was a cold, prickling sensation that seemed to burst out right from the middle of his gut. As if thousands of tiny creatures had been released, the feeling moved around in waves in his body. His skin crawled and his nose was filled with a sharp, metallic smell; the foreign and distressing sensation could rouse the dead. Xander knew too well that ‘nose’ was only a figure of speech, because this smell was caused by magic that directly stimulated his brain. It was the unique signs of Nohrian healing magic, terrible but comforting at the same time.

Xander waited, tried several times until he could feel his breaths and his throat could swallow. “The… princess…” he croaked. He couldn’t even hear his own voice.

“She will be fine,” a deep voice slowly spoke each word next to his ear.

He tried to open his eyes. They were rigid; the lids stuck and dragged down heavily against his effort. He had to blink continuously, trying to snatch up slivers of vision. Something was placed above him, further blocking the view. He tried to shake his head, and the thing was gone.

“His eyes are probably fine now,” a soft voice said, then light bloomed in front of him and the sensation of healing returned. The words were true, the pain behind his eyes had subsided.

Xander started to take in deeper breaths, hoping that he could gather enough strength to do something – talking, getting up, anything less  _ dead _ than what he was doing then. Before long, however, someone had crouched down. He noticed the hair and recognized it to be Azura’s. Through the blurry and interrupted vision, Xander saw her expression, and his heart ached sharply. The look of resolve on her face was filled with grief and cold anger, it was the kind of look that Xander had wished he would never have to see on anyone again. He was suddenly consumed by a panic urge to see his brother and sisters immediately, to make sure that they were not pained by his horrifying condition.

Azura laid a hand on his chest to stop him from trying to rise up.

“We will end this,” she said, her words rang clear like the sounds of crystal bells. “Please rest, brother.”

She stood up swiftly, her grace was that of a deadly warrior. Xander panicked even more. He wanted to reach out and stop her, but as he tried to raise his hand, a broad hand gently wrapped around it. The low voice spoke once more, this time only a single word. “Laslow,” it called.

Xander felt his upper body being lifted up, then lowered again. He kept thinking of what he had heard. Memories, sensations, reasons seemed to have broken out from their usual streams and deeper reserves, floating around in a thick fog, mixing up in time and meanings. When had he been struck by that repressed tone on a cold battle field? Where had he known this worry-tinged voice from a sunny afternoon? It hurt his brain, yet he could not stop questions from flooding out. His mind was like a boat tumbling among too many different courses. He kept pushing and pushing, until finally the details pieced together.

The hand, the voice, the concoction, the healing.

It was Ryoma behind him all along. He had not felt down to the ground; Ryoma had caught him, had poured the potion over him and shielded his hurting eyes from the light of Nohrian healing magic under someone else’s direction.  _ Elise’s. _

Everyone had been so close behind him. All final illusion of strength suddenly drained from Xander at the realization of complete security; he let his body lay limp in Laslow’s arms, only making a final attempt at turning up his eyes to find Ryoma’s face. There it was, starkly pale even in his blurry vision, those handsome eyebrows drawn together painfully, those powerful eyes filled with a storm of emotions.

If Ryoma noticed him looking, he did not say anything. He gently brushed his palm over Xander’s eyes. Xander let the eyelids fell shut along with the touch; the last thought that lingered in his mind was one of tender guilt and relief.

\-------

\-------

Leo had never felt every moment so excruciatingly. Things seemed to drag on eternally – the fighting, the winning, the post battle work. They returned just before dusk and the war council adjourned at around midnight in a quiet mood. The royal members stayed behind afterward, awkwardly hung around each other in hope of providing group support. Even Camilla was not fully composed, although she and Corrin did offer everyone else as many soothing and cheerful lines as usually expected of them. If he was to be honest, the show of sentiment made Leo terribly restless. The moment Azama brought news that Xander was awake, he volunteered to go update his brother and pretty much ran out of the door.

He ran all the way to the infirmary, which was actually not far at all, then stopped dead at the front door, panting in shallow breaths.  _ Calm down, foolish boy,  _ he berated himself, trying to breathe more normally.

Shortly after, he heard someone coming from behind in long, measured strides. He stood up straight and pushed the door open before glancing back. The sight of Prince Ryoma brought him some relief, the high prince had been uninclined to say much tonight.

Hinoka and Xander were placed in a room on the first floor of the building. When Leo walked in with Prince Ryoma, the curtain between the beds were drawn and the only light on was next to Xander’s bed. Xander’s eyes were closed, but he tilted his head toward them as they approached. He was in comfortable clothes and the grime on his face had been cleaned. Still, his color was sickly gray and his hair remained tangled up with dirt.

“I’m guessing… Leo, and someone else,” he smiled, speaking toward Elise and Princess Sakura, who were sitting by the bed.

Leo heard Prince Ryoma softly exhale behind him. “Hello, Xander,” the prince said. His voice was quiet as well, still firm and laden with power but lacking its usual booming quality.

“Ah, Ryoma,” Xander said brightly but weakly. “I need a little more training then; I can already tell your footsteps when you walk on stairs, you know.”

Although Xander sounded tired and slightly slurred, it was clear that he was making an effort to stay as in control as possible. Leo gingerly sat down on the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling?” he asked.

“A little clogged everywhere, I am afraid. I am bracing for the aftershocks now. Elise expects there will be lots of headache and disorientation, I hope that doesn’t necessarily mean that I won’t be able to keep food down.”

“Your sense of balance has always been good, I think you will recover quickly,” Elise said with an easy voice.

“One- One point to horse riders!” Sakura cheered softly. The flash of Elise’s influence on her surprised Leo for a moment.

“And to politicians too,” Xander chuckled. “Ryoma, I’ll show you when you visit Nohr. Our courtiers change face so fast they’ll make your head spin.”

“You are making me build very high expectations here,” Prince Ryoma replied, but he wasn’t truly smiling.

Leo shook his head lightly. He couldn’t think of the last time his brother had to attempt a joke to lighten the mood. “How is Princess Hinoka? Will the trauma be bad for her?” He asked the young princesses.

“She probably will run a high fever among other things, so it will be uncomfortable for her soon,” Elise said. “We advised her to take a mild sleeping potion and rest well before the symptoms set in. She should wake in… ah, about twenty minutes, then we will give her food.”

The crash had broken three of Hinoka’s ribs and fractured another; her pegasus’s thrashing also worsened the internal bleeding. When the healers reached her, she had pretty much passed out from shock and pain. That none of her organs was punctured had made the healing uncomplicated, but the trauma was still going to be significant. Leo grimaced as he turned to Prince Ryoma. “If they decide to go, we must move them as soon as possible, maybe right after her meal.”

“I agree,” Prince Ryoma said, then asked Princess Sakura: “How long will it take their bodies to readjust?”

“Uhm, two days, if they are only going to observe the next battle. If they want to fight, they should have at least five to six days of complete rest.”

“Up to three days on our side then,” Prince Ryoma remarked, mostly to himself.

“I’m not quite following,” Xander said.

“Since you and Princess Hinoka will need time to recuperate, Lilith suggests that she can bring you two to another realm, where time flows slightly faster,” Leo explained. He followed with a smaller voice, “That is, if you want to. You don’t have to rush back to the battlefield or anythin-”

“Of course I would like to be back quickly,” Xander interjected. “But everything depends on how fast the council decide we must march, and whether I am going to fight or not is up to whether you need me out there.”

_ I need you around.  _ Leo slumped, then quickly realized what he was doing and stood up to avoid further embarrassing himself.

Next to him, Prince Ryoma reached out a hand and patted his head.

Leo was too startled to react; when he came back to himself, the right moment had passed. “We will take you to the other realm and hope for the best,” he vaguely heard Prince Ryoma concluded the discussion. When the prince said his goodbyes and turned to leave, he followed like it was out of habit.

They found Camilla standing just outside of the door, crossing her arms and leaning back on the wall. “Are they looking better?” She asked.

“Xander certainly is,” Prince Ryoma replied. “Hinoka is sleeping right now, but there doesn’t seem to be any serious concern. Xander wants to go to the other realm, and we can ask my sister’s wish shortly. I expect that she will want to go as well; if so, they should leave in roughly an hour.”

“I see,” Camilla nodded and started to walk with them back to the living quarter.

“You are not coming inside to see them?” Leo asked.

“…I don’t know, my dear. I fear that I am too ugly a sight right now. I certainly am feeling ugly inside.”

Leo didn’t know what he could say to her. His sister took a look at his expression and Prince Ryoma’s, then chuckled. “Despite your faith in my mental aptitude, I do crave avoidance sometimes.”

“Frankly speaking, you are still the best among us,” Prince Ryoma said.

“Ahaha, you have no idea how I was when Xander and I was younger. Whenever he was injured, I would sneak into his room with alcohols and drink all night long, then return to my room to sleep through the day. It was the only way to stop me from going out there and start avenging recklessly.” Camilla laughed even harder as Leo’s eyebrows rose higher and higher. “Xander had to witness a fair share of me ranting drunkenly and hiding under his bed and climbing trees left and right.”

“Wh-what did Xander do in, eh, the reverse situation?” Leo asked

“He practiced swinging his sword out on the balcony, or trained his penmanship in my room. He didn’t actually trust himself with much alcohol back then.”

“…Now I am afraid to ask what you two did whenever I was hurt.”

“Oh we drank as well, just not enough to get drunk, because afterward we always went out and avenged you. Responsibly, I mean.”

“Let me say that if we are not in the middle of war, I would invite both of you to drink with me right now,” Prince Ryoma said. Leo nodded along decidedly, even though his alcohol tolerance was crap. He also didn’t jump or mind it when the prince briefly patted his head again.

Seeing that the living room of the Hoshidan’s wing was lit bright, the three of them came into the room together. Corrin and Azura were there with Takumi.

Prince Ryoma relayed the new information and asked: “Who would like to come to the other realm with them? I think we don’t need more than two people here to oversee things, it’s a good chance to rest too, if you need some time…”

He glanced at Azura, but she immediately shook her head. “I will stay. I don’t really want to have too much time to think right now.” She closed her fingers around the locket in her palm.

“Then I will stay,” Corrin said simply. She smiled. “You should all go.”

“I, urg, I would like to stay as well,” Leo looked around, then turned to Camilla and Prince Ryoma with pleading eyes. He felt an odd pang of guilt for doing this, like he was using some kind of younger brother privilege on them.

Camilla regarded him kindly. “Very well. I guess if my face is too sour, Sakura and Elise will have to save the day.”

“I will go with you. How about you, Takumi?” Prince Ryoma asked.

“I don’t know if I will be of any help…”

“That’s as good a reason as any to come,” Camilla said.

Takumi hesitated, glanced at Leo, then nodded. “All right.”

*

When Leo finally returned to his room in the dead of the night, he stepped in but did not close the door right away. Instead, he stared at Xander’s door across the corridor. The quietness all around suddenly made him shiver. Fear crept up his spine, like a reminder that bad things had happened outside of his watch today, and if he shut the door now and become blind and deaf to the world-

Leo just left the door open, strode into the room and flung himself down on his bed. He buried his head under the pillow.  _ Get yourself together already. You have been running away all evening, yet now that you are left alone, you can’t, you can’t- _ He groaned as unbidden thoughts started to make themselves known. This was far from the first time he was in such a situation, but knowing what to do didn’t make it any easier. He tried to lay very still and strained his mind to stay blank. At any moment, the events of the day threatened to replay all over again; he could only hope that exhaustion would soon take over. As his consciousness started to drift, he was even afraid to ask if sleep was coming or not, fearing that it would wake the cogs of his mind again. 

It was in this fitful state that he heard a small rustle near the door. He immediately raised his head up to look. Not all of his senses were able to catch up, however, and he could only make out a vague figure outlined by the dim corridor light.

“Leo, are you awake?” Takumi’s voice raised softly.

Leo needed a moment to clear his head. “You… You guys haven’t left?” He asked.

Takumi drew nearer to the bed. “We are leaving soon. I wanted to say goodbye and saw the door left opened.” Leo still couldn’t see Takumi’s face, only a shadow, but he felt a warm hand gently touched his cheek. “Are you very tired? Our meeting did not end that long ago.”

“I don’t know.”  _ I really don’t. Has time barely passed?  _ Leo leaned into the touch and closed his eyes again. He put a hand over Takumi’s wrist, feeling the pulse with his thumb and let it calm him down.

“Do you really want to stay here?” Takumi asked lightly.

Leo couldn’t answer.

Sometime later, he finally exhaled and moved his hand away. Takumi picked it up and put something cool on the palm, a key.

“Come hang out in my room if you like. Don’t think about stress, relax when you can.”

“…You are only going to be away for two days.”

“Just in case, okay? Read a book. Take the  _ go _ set and play with Hinata.”

“Hinata is-”

“I know, I know. Teach him how to play  _ go _ properly,” Takumi amended.

“We’ll see,” Leo grumbled, but he clutched the key and tuck his fist under the pillow. Takumi hummed and rose up. “Do you want me to close the door?”

“It’s up to you,” Leo said honestly. He was feeling better.

Without saying more, Takumi walked out. The door swung with little noise; there was no final click. As he sunk further into the mattress, Leo pulled the blanket up to his nose to preserve the warmth Takumi had left him with. Unpleasant thoughts tried to rise at the edge of his mind again, but before any could fully form, slumber had reached him.

\-------

\-------

Ryoma should be pleased with everything. Lilith had brought them to a seaside town, where affluent tight-lipped strangers came and went every day. In the short time between the war council’s decision and their departure for the other realm, the girl had found for them a cottage on the outskirts of the town, paid rent for a whole week, and arranged to have fresh groceries delivered every day. That things could happen so easily at such odd hour of the day was an excellent indicator that the locals were not going to pry into their affairs.

The place was even sunnier and warmer than Valla, as if it was still in early autumn. Hinoka’s temperature did rise during the first night, but the fever broke before noon. Her pains and aches also reached their peaks and decreased within the day. By the second morning, she was only fighting nausea and fatigue. Xander, who suffered more short-lived symptoms, was already able to get out of bed and perform light exercises.

Ryoma should be pleased. Instead, he felt as if his attention to anything around was mechanical. Something was smoldering inside him, a flame that mocked him through its gentleness and insistence. It flared up whenever he failed to occupy his mind with three urgent things at once, and sometimes overwhelmed him regardless of those obstacles, making him want to drop everything at once and go find Xander to say  _ one insane thing _ , forget time and place, forget fear and presumptions. It made him want to laugh at himself. Barely more than a day had passed, and he already felt keenly why Azura did not want to have too much time to think.

“I can’t believe I am still bed ridden.” Hinoka complained loudly when he visited her after lunch.

“Stay positive, you are going to recover very quickly in the first three days. Yesterday was really good, wasn’t it? Did Sakura or Elise tell you when you should feel well enough to walk around?”

“This evening, actually, but I’d much rather it be right now. Who need five more hours of headache?” his sister whined.

“How are you going to survive the next four days at this rate?” Ryoma laughed and pinched her cheek. He wanted to remind her how bad her injuries had been, but she had heard enough about that from other people.

“I am going to spar all day and wipe the floor with you every single time, thank you,” she rolled her eyes at him. “Seriously though, entertain me. Spill some gossips.”

“What? Who do you think I am?”

“Don’t feign innocent. You only stay calm and look reliable so that people would trust you while you observe and analyze them. You would make a fantastic information dealer. And Xander too. You should have been here when I milked him for funny stories about Camilla earlier; he told things that even Camilla didn’t remember. What a scary memory.”

“ _ You _ are running the gossip mill now? Should I fear that you have sold me out as well?”

“You can-” Hinoka started to snicker, “You can try to pay me to learn what I have told them.” She laughed out loud when Ryoma made a show of dragging a palm over his face. When she had enjoyed his misery enough, she schooled her face and said: “There is something I am willing to pay to know though,” she tucked at Ryoma’s sleeve to draw him closer. “What is it that has been bothering you since yesterday? I only know to be frank with you, so just tell me if you don’t want to talk, otherwise I must ask. Is it about Lady Scarlet? Or Queen Arete? Did our injuries give you a great scare? Are you worried about the war?”

He looked at her with hesitation, trying to judge how obvious he had really been. “I think about all of that, but none is really troubling me, sister dear.”

“I am telling you that your face has been showing something other than composure, Ryoma. It’s unlike you to keep things to yourself, so although we are willing to wait for you to speak, you should know that you are making Takumi and Sakura quite nervous.”

“You volunteered to poke at me, I see.” Ryoma couldn’t help ruffling her hair.

“I have patient amnesty right now,” Hinoka stuck her tongue out. “And I’m curious. It doesn’t seem like something alarming, but it’s visible. Everyone has noticed, really; you must be thinking a lot.”

Ryoma sighed and sighed. He must admit that he wanted to let some steam out. “I need to- I want to talk to Xander about something, but the timing is just-” He waved his hand unhelpfully.

Hinoka stared at him for a moment. “Xander, of all people?” She asked with surprise. “There are still things that you can’t talk to him because of timing? Why would now be bad? Whether it’s about war or peace, you two will only have now to talk about them…”

_ I’m used to speaking freely with him, that's why this is hard. _ “It’s the kind of thing that drove you to leave the wedding party the other day, Hinoka.”

Hinoka’s eyes slowly widened.

“T-Takumi told me the story in details.” Ryoma tried to fill in the silence.

“…Oh.” His sister blinked at him. “Oooh.”

Ryoma said nothing more. Outside, crickets roared.

“Oh, uh,” Hinoka blushed, looking at anywhere but him. She was waking up all kinds of self-doubt in Ryoma. “I’m not the pool of wisdom for this, I’m afraid. Do- Do you want me to ask Camilla to advise you?”

Ryoma started. “Good heaven, no.” He backed away from the bed. “Maybe I should leave.”

“Wait wait!” Hinoka cried out. “Let’s… Let’s skip the awkward part.” She looked at his wary expression and took a couple of deep breaths. “Just one question… How far have you gone?”

Ryoma didn’t need to ponder this. “I know my feelings,” the words came out easily.

Hinoka stared at him for some time, pinning him under her brilliant gaze. Slowly, the grin returned to her face. “Then do it now. Perfect timing, even, I know where Xander is.” She reached out to take an apple from the fruit bowl on the bed stand, tucked it under her chin and wrapped her arms around it as if hugging a doll. “I will give you a good reason to talk to him in a minute.”

“Hinoka-”

“Knowing you and how much alike we are, not talking to him is not an option, am I right?”

“…You are, but-”

“Then you would know exactly how I felt when I ran off to find Camilla that night. Even now, I can’t imagine doing it any differently, because that’s who I am. How about you?”

Ryoma opened his mouth several times but could not speak. If he started to, there would be no way back.

Hinoka just chuckled and proffered the apple to him. “Bring my love to Hoori, will you? Good luck.”

*

Dazed and armed with only an apple, Ryoma walked to the stable.  _ I can’t believe I just had that conversation.  _ Talking to Hinoka was like riding a good wave, but she was different from Xander. It was in Ryoma’s instinct to appear more confident and collected around his siblings; but what would happen when he come face to face with Xander, he couldn’t tell. Could he simply speak of all that had been tormenting him, all the thoughts that had been swirling inside his mind, refusing to fit into one clear answer because he dreaded the gravity of an honest confession? Could he treat these new feelings like he once treated the bittersweet thoughts that had accumulated through more than a decade of his life? Let Xander know them all, turmoil still untangled, and have no fear that Xander would be anything less than a comforting voice, no matter the final verdict?

When Ryoma reached the stable entrance, he had to stop and take in the sight inside. Ishtar was lying down on a bed of hay, her head rested low on her fore legs in complete relaxation. Xander was sitting on the ground next to her, leaning back against her torso and resting an arm on her back. Mun was also there on the mare’s back, offering companion in her own unique way; she glanced at Ryoma and twitched an ear.

Xander brightened up when he stepped in. “Ryoma! Are you visiting Hoori?”

“I’m playing messenger,” Ryoma raised the hand holding the apple and went to the pegasus at the other side of the stable. Hoori sniffed at the fruit and took it from his hand with excitement. The pegasus must be happy to find the smell of his master again, as Hinoka had not been able to visit him since the battle. In the next few days, Hinoka would have to help her mount overcome his trauma as well. Although healing magic did wonder on him, the residual pain and the memory of falling must be addressed before the animal could fight again.

For Ishtar, Xander’s presence had clearly helped. Ryoma lightly scratched the horse’s nose before settling down in front of Xander. “She was distressed throughout yesterday, and now look at her.”

“Camilla teased me that she only came along because Ishtar wouldn’t listen to half a word from anyone else,” Xander huffed out a laugh, but turned to Ryoma with curious eyes. He must have noticed that Ryoma was in seiza.

Ryoma spent a moment to simply look at Xander. He could keep the light conversation going, could ask about Xander's health or his closer friendship with Hinoka, but those thoughts fell away when he saw Xander’s open expression. How different Xander had become since they first talked; there was still the tiredness, the pale worried look, but also youth and hope shining through. Light had always been there, waiting to pierce through darkness, and when Ryoma thought of what he would like to see safe and blooming in the future, he found that the words for his feelings had been ready on the tip of his tongue all along.

“There is much I have to tell you about that battle,” he began. “You saved me twice that day. Once when you pulled me back when I faced Scarlet, once when you put your life on the line for Hinoka. I know you think that I don’t owe you anything in this, but please understand that I need to voice my gratitude.”

Xander regarded him and smiled. “I understand, and you are right about what I think as well.”

“Those are words that I say as a lord and a warrior, a friend of Scarlet, a brother of Hinoka.” Ryoma leaned forward. “What I want to say next is from all that I am, all that you know of me and do not have to doubt.”

“Xander, when I saw you fell in front of my eyes, I thought the world has stopped.”

He felt Xander’s breath faltered. He kept pressing on. “I felt anguish that rendered me mute and lost. Even when I had you in my arms and saw you healing by the second, I was drowning. Now you are well again and I will not speak of pain anymore, still… I remember being overwhelmed while thinking that I should feel exactly so, because I love you and I am supposed to know that already. My heart hold for you such singular, unstoppable adoration.”  

“I don't know what I should dare to ask for, but I must say something. Whenever I think of you, I fear that I would blurt everything out for the world to hear, but if there is anyone I can confide to, it is only you, my best friend, my dearest. In the end, these words are meant only for you and only your words will ever matter.”

Ryoma didn't realize how tense he was until he finished speaking.  _ One. Two. _ He inhaled and exhaled, blinking several times to focus on Xander's face again. Color had risen high on Xander’s cheeks, but his honest gaze did not stray from Ryoma. For that simple reaction alone, Ryoma fell even deeper than he thought possible. It hit him at once how irrational the thought was, and somehow, as a counter to this accusation, all of the most irrational parts in Ryoma's heart suddenly cried out loudly: desire, possessiveness, infatuation‒

_ He is so close, so close. _ Ryoma became dimly aware that he was just short of pushing into Xander’s space and scrambled to straighten his back. But Xander must have mistaken that Ryoma intended to leave, for he hastily took hold of a corner of Ryoma's sleeve and leaned forward so strongly they almost collided. Ryoma quickly caught him by his shoulders. “Won’t- Won’t you wait for my answer?” Xander asked urgently, not caring that he had nearly fallen on top of Ryoma.

“Xander,” Ryoma said lowly, feeling the coil of heat inside him ignited into flame. Just one gesture was enough to fill him with selfish hope. He brought Xander’s hands to his face, this time indulging in the feeling of the palms on his skin. He wondered whose hand was shaking, whose pulses were thumping in his ear.

Hesitantly, Xander caressed his cheek. Large fingers brushed by his temple and combed through his hair. Ryoma knew he would greedily preserve this moment forever.

“Even the king in you?” Finally, Xander asked.

Ryoma tilted his head down. “The king in me awaits the wishes of his equal.”

In a moment, Xander’s arms came around him, and Ryoma sank into the embrace. He felt as if he had known this temperature before, just right and welcoming him to stay, like it was a familiar heat that had been taken from him for too long and only now returned. Their chests rose and fell along each other’s. They shared the silence. Then, just above his ear, Xander let out a hot breath and whispered: “I want to answer you properly, but when- when you talk like that, I can’t even find my voice. I think, I think…” Xander swallowed, “Ryoma, falling for you is the easiest thing that has ever happened to me, I don’t know what to do.”

Ryoma shivered and pressed his lips on the base of Xander’s neck. He kissed the curves of muscle there, then the pale scar just under the jaw, the sensitive skin hidden behind the ear, the wrinkle at the corner of the eye, … on and on until Xander shuddered and moved back to catch his breath.

Ryoma looked up into dark eyes. Soft light shimmered in them, enveloping him in tenderness. Ah, how he had always wished to be able to look this closely into them, to search for the reason he was so affected by everything their owner did.

“Your eyes are so warm,” Xander murmured.

Ryoma leaned forward to meet Xander’s lips. They were warm and gentle, still at first, then moving slightly to accommodate him. Xander’s eyes fluttered closed, then quickly blinked and opened, as if Xander had only just realized what he had done. Ryoma smiled and decided to close his eyes first, pressing deeper in to their kiss.

A small body lithely brushed by his side, accompanied with a bored meow. Little paws pressed on one of his tight, then left. This time, it was Xander’s turn to smile against his lips.

In the second and third and every kiss that Ryoma had from that day onward, he would always find the sweetness that he had tasted in that very first one.

\------

\------

Takumi was glad to find that he was not totally useless after all. While the elder royalties took care of themselves, he looked after the young princesses. When Sakura and Elise were performing their duty as healers, everyone deferred to them and let them keep late hours, but once the emergency had passed, Takumi took it upon himself to ensure that the girls rested when they should. He played with them and trained with them, escorted them to town and provided as many shopping commentaries as asked of him. At the end of each day, he followed them around to provide elaborations as they retold their adventures to willing listeners. Unreluctant as he might have been toward these activities at the beginning of the campaign, now he had to admit that they were enjoyable. If there was a moment or two when he simply forgot about suspicions of spies and presentiments of Anankos’s next moves, he allowed them without scolding himself. The beach in this realm reminded him of home and uncomplicated days.

And he wished Leo was there. Oh, how he longed to see a carefree Leo who only needed to concern himself with fun and games, whose daily worries would only be climbing trees for kites, complaining about the sun, diving into book stores that sell mostly tourist guides and cheap romance novels ( _ still, they are foreign! _ ), or pretending to sleep on the grass so that Sakura and Elise could mess up his hair with crowns of nuts and flowers. Thinking about this made him regret not convincing Leo to come, for Leo’s sake as well as his own, and in time this regret grew so big that it needed an act of correction. Takumi made up his mind on the third night at the cottage. At dawn on the fourth day, he got up early and started strolling aimlessly around the house, waiting for someone to wake up so that he could relay his decision to them.

It was Pri- Camilla who ended up finding him first. She looked at him, surprised, as he closed the front door after visiting the small garden outside for the fifth time. “Where did you go so early, Takumi? Without your outdoor coat too,” she said.

“I went for a short walk, is all. Camilla, I- uhm, I am thinking of going back to switch with Leo.” He launched straight to the point. “He should have some time to rest here with you, Xander, and Elise.”

It took Camilla a moment to fully understand his proposal. “That is very kind of you,” she smiled, “But it is still quite early, won’t you stay for breakfast? Let Sakura and Elise know that you are leaving first? They have been happy about having you all for themselves, you know.”

Seeing him blink at this revelation, she huffed out a laugh. “You are adorable. Let’s bring them tea and biscuits, a pre-breakfast in bed is nice once in a while.”

They went into the kitchen together. Takumi said yes to tea but declined biscuit for himself. They sat down at the small table by the window to wait for the water to heat. “This is like a mini vacation for us, isn’t it?” Takumi tried to make conversation. “Only my body still remembers that we are at war, my mind has nearly forgotten.”

Camilla chuckled. “This is a big vacation, my dear. I love that we have such a big group here. Every day is so lively and exciting, it is such a novelty to me. Whenever my family go on a trip, it is usually private and quiet.”

“You have so many great ideas though,” Takumi said. “Hinoka loves having you here with her. The rest of us just aren’t enough to entertain her.” He made a mocking face.

“Is that what you see? Camilla laughed. “I think she can’t handle bed rest; seeing me just makes her impatient. It’s really cute, but I am thinking about making myself scarce lest she overexert herself.” The she smiled. “How about you? Have you been enjoying the past few days? I have heard interesting accounts from Elise.”

“Y-Yes. It has been very relaxing for me,” Takumi replied. “More than I have expected, to be honest. I don’t really know how to nurse another person to health or be a positive presence for a patient, I was afraid that I would get in everyone’s way.”

“No no, I worry about a completely different thing when it come to you,” Camilla shook her head and laugh. “Hinoka told me that neither Ryoma nor her has gotten an injury this grave before. They are taking it in good spirit, and you are not bad yourself, but I imagine that you may be a little shocked.”

This remark surprised Takumi greatly. At his astonished expression, the princess explained. “Pardon me if I sound presumptuous to you. It’s only that in my experience, when the parents are… absent from a person’s life from a young age, their elder siblings sometimes grow into roles that are even bigger than parental ones.” Camilla chuckled wryly. “Oh my, I am not making much sense, am I?”

But Takumi knew exactly what she was referring to. Her words touched something deep in his heart; they stunned him and then made him laugh too. “You are being much more candid about this than I have been for years.” He rubbed a hand over his face. “Yes, I was quite shaken when Hinoka was injured, but I think I am fine now. I understand what you are saying though, you are very astute. I-, how do I say this-, I have always felt a lot more pressure to catch up to Hinoka and Ryoma than to my parents. It’s not exactly that I’m trying to compete with them, but at the same time I must compare myself to their standards. It feels like… like if I cannot do that, I would soon run out of time to be anything at all.”

Thankfully, Camilla did not laugh at his twisted confession. “I would love to ask Hinoka and Ryoma for their thoughts on that. You might be pleasantly surprised,” she smiled while taking the kettle off the fire. “When he was younger, Xander used to dread the day Leo would surpass him on all fronts.”

“…I can’t imagine that,” Takumi said. He thought about Xander for a moment longer. “I really can’t. Besides, Leo is very attached to both of you, I hope you realize.”

“We do. We are aware that you have been a very good friend to him too, thank you, Takumi.”

The sudden praise caught Takumi off guard. He could not find the word to follow. Camilla did not mind; she simply continued to talk while tending to the tea: “How about you? Are you attached to your elders?”

Takumi pondered the word. “Uhm, I don’t know. To be honest, I have never thought of being attached to Ryoma or Hinoka. I love being with them, but they are… not really people who one can attach oneself to, haha.” He laughed lamely. “They are such powerful leaders that I can’t help but following them around.” Not to mention so much more mature and determined.

“How about your mother then? Queen Mikoto, I mean.”

This question threw him off even more. He stared down at the cup in his hands. “I can’t tell. I know I was attached to her, but now that my knowledge of her has changed and I have as well, my feelings have morphed into something that I… can’t find the right explanation for.” He looked up at Camilla, feeling apologetic for no reason.

“Don’t look like that, my dear Takumi.” Camilla smiled gently. “I am sorry that I asked such pointed questions. If you don’t mind that I am speaking from experience again, I think you are doing well on the matter. You know what is yet deciphered in your heart. Be kind to yourself.”

_ Experience,  _ sometimes just hearing the word from one of the Nohrian royals was enough to make Takumi shiver. Then he felt a flush of appreciation for Camilla.  _ She asks because she is looking out for me _ .

Across from him, Camilla suddenly said: “I am thinking that you should to stay here and let me switch with Leo.”

The idea startled Takumi. “But you are really special to him!” He blurted out.

“I quite believe that your presence will be special for him as well.”

Takumi’s cheeks heated up a little. “It’s not the same.”

“No, but maybe that’s why it will help him more. I think he will be happy to enjoy the funs of this realm with you as well. I can’t be a real playmate to him, for example. Besides, who knows when we will have another chance like this for you two after the war.”

“Uhm-” Takumi couldn’t argue back. He tried to find another excuse, but Camilla was faster. “How about this,” she said, “I will come back and send him over; if he asks me to come here with him, or if you later observe that he needs me here, I will come immediately.”

Takumi opened his mouth, then closed it. Although he knew that the latter scenario was highly unlikely, Camilla’s smile told him that he would have no choice but to acquiesce to her very reasonable suggestion. He decided to surrender gracefully then and, an hour later, while surrounded by two excited young girls waiting for the arrival of Leo, still wondered about the power of persuasion that was the second princess of Nohr.

*

What Takumi did not know was that Leo spent the first day at the fortress in agitation. That as Leo became the only lord left in the royal living quarter and people tried to avoid bothering him more than absolutely necessary, the quietness all around started to give him a false sense of slowness. That although he did more work than usual, he saw fewer people, and even ended up spending most of his time in the living room on the first floor, making himself readily available for anyone who needed him. Few people did.

It was thus that when Takumi was rolling around in bed, wishing that he could get up immediately and bring Leo to the other realm, Leo was sitting at the desk in his room, staring out the window at the bright winter noon of Valla and listlessly playing with the key in his hand.

He thought of the times he had been in this unbalanced state before, how he used to read to exhaustion or go find something menial to do, all for the purpose of waiting out the days until an urgent development would help him focus again. He wondered why this tiny key seemed to propose a better option this time, why he felt it could help him, or why he was trying to resist using it if it wasn’t such a big deal.

_ You know why, coward,  _ Leo chided himself and stood up. He made his way to the top stair, but stopped there and turned to look to his right, where the locked door stood solemnly. Its presence was almost ridiculous now.

He shook his head at the thought of finding Corrin to ask where the key was, instead coming back to knock on Niles’s door. “Would you mind picking a lock now?” he asked as evenly as possible.

To his credit, Niles did not even raise an eyebrow while providing his service. Leo’s short trip down the hallway of the Hoshidan’s wing was equally uneventful, despite his fear that a remaining retainer could appear and, so to say, caught him red-handed. He went into Takumi’s room, shut the door behind himself, lost his shoes, and proceeded to pull the curtains and open the door and windows to the balcony.

What greeted him was the same scene that he was seeing from his room five minutes prior. He didn’t mind. He laid down the futon and wrapped himself in the blanket. Once inside the cocoon, he took a deep breath of the familiar smell. He had taken naps here before, with and without Takumi, but never with this much… liberty. It was somewhat thrilling, then also satisfying and silly, given that no one would so much as blink if they knew.

His eyes flickered among the items that Takumi had on his low writing table, easily recognizing them by what small parts he could see – the slim tattered books, the  _ go _ set ( _ gods, that thing would become to be a war relic to them one day _ ), some math tools that did not fit into the stationary box. They tickled some inspirations in him, suddenly giving him the energy he had failed to find for work or play back when he was still in his room. He didn’t act on these urge, however, just continued to look aimlessly around, then to the brightness outside. 

The heavy weight in his chest slowly eased away. Eventually, he found that the dull headache didn’t bother him whenever he closed his eyes anymore, so he left his eyelids shut. He wouldn't call what he did sleeping, maybe just ten or twenty minutes of pleasant blankness, of being aware and at peace with the world.

He opened his eyes feeling refreshed, got up and made a trip to his room to get some paperwork. He attended to them while enjoying Takumi's bed, mind freed of unwanted distractions and pleased with his own decision.

And he was also right about how people would think of finding him there. When Camilla walked into the room later that afternoon, she was cool as a cucumber.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I imagine Valla to be so temperate that Leo would have no problem with laying there with the door and windows open. Takumi might complain a little when he comes back though lol.


	8. Chapter 8

Many years later, Hinoka would still have to reassure Camilla that she did not hold the memory of that day with only horrors.

As Anankos’s sicken plans unfolded before her eyes, there was a part of her heart that remained grounded and steady. It questioned whether Anankos had learnt from their battle against Scarlet and Queen Arete. Was that why their parents felt more… real? Did the dragon want to play on the chance that they still desperately crave the warmth of a complete family?

Then it would have been right, just not enough. If it thought that it could tramp on their hearts so easily, could make them burn in their own flame of anger and sadness, it was sorely mistaken. Before the campaign, she would have been unsure about that. Now, with the people by their side and the future they looked forward to, she had no doubt.

 _How strong have we become?_ she wondered.

\-----------

\-----------

Everything was wrong.

When they stepped through Lilith's portal, they stepped from the dark, foul corridors of Gyges into a bright and gentle winter afternoon. Everything looked wrong and smelled wrong. With bewilderment, Takumi noticed green buds on the trees surrounding him. The signs of spring and rebirth was a cruel taunt. Around him, people moved like a funeral procession. Hoshidan soldiers walked with stricken faces and dragged steps. Here and there, their Nohrian allies quietly picked up the post-battle works, leaving their friends space to… to mourn _._

That’s right, it was a battle against _his mother and father._

The thought trickled like molasse in Takumi’s mind.

Then it was- It was Elise who staggered forward, her hands reached out toward Sakura. “I’m sorry, S-akura, I’m so sorry-”, she could only manage so much before breaking into sobs, large tears streaming down her face. She hastily raised both hands to wipe them, but only ended up leaving wet streaks of dirt from her gloves all over her cheeks.

Sakura’s lips trembled silently. Then she bursted out crying as well, like water breaking through a dam. She hid behind her hands; her small frame shook violently with each heave. Takumi felt as if his chest has been flanked open, his heart ripped out to be squeezed to the last drop. He dimly heard a rustle, then Xander walked by, lightly touched Ryoma’s elbow before going to the girls. The Nohrian prince crouched down, picked Elise up and carried her to a bench, where he sat down with her on his lap. Ryoma, startled out of his daze, picked Sakura up as well and sat next to him. The princesses wept into their brothers’ shoulders. Slowly, Sakura reached out a hand toward Elise, and the latter instantly took it in a firm grip.

Takumi didn’t know what he should be feeling anymore. There were too many thoughts trying to make themselves known in his mind, but his body felt too sick. He was shivering in chilliness, yet his eyes and forehead were burning. As he stared so hard at the scene before him that his vision started to swim, something sharp and biting began to rise in his throat. Terrified that he was going to keel over on the spot, he abruptly turned around and walked, hoping to find some balance alone in the forest.

“Takumi-” He heard Hinoka called out beside him, but he pretended that he couldn’t hear her. Then Leo walked into his line of sight, visibly worried. For a brief moment, Takumi pulled himself together. “I’ll be fine,” he quickly patted on Leo’s arm and kept walking briskly, escaping before anyone could think of chasing after him.

He wandered dizzily in the forest before running to the lake, drawn toward it by the feel of the wind. The water there was as magnificent as ever, so beautiful that it hurted. He stared at if for a while, panting and watching until the endless depth started to look too seductive to his chaotic mind. He turned his back to it and began to make himself breathe properly, counting for as long as he could make himself focus.

It worked, until it didn't.

Slowly, the numbers in his head morphed into a face. He forgot to breathe again. How did his mother feel, when she realized that the Nohrian princess they kidnapped was family? When she learned that her dear elder sister had passed, leaving Azura to think that she was all alone in this world? Was she aware of everything and planned everything accordingly? And- And she knew about the Yato. _Oh mother-._ She must have wished so desperately for peace between Hoshido and Nohr, yet everyone around her only ever spoke of hatred and revenge. They embodied everything she knew would bring ruin to this world. As a soul trapped in the grip of Anankos, did her last hope lay in facing them in battle – the sign that they were finally seeing the truth and fighting to put an end to this nightmare?

Without invitation, his mind replayed the words that his mother had uttered when she was still warped. To perish together, to be happy in imprisonment… There was honesty in the mad idea. His mother’s dream of a family had been destroyed too many times, who could fault her for desiring that?

He shook his head angrily, trying to chase the thought away, but all that he accomplished was making space for other poisons to flood in. His father appeared - the father that he knew more through legends than memory. His father was as fierce as he had imagined, as kind as he had hoped. At the same time, something made him shudder with dreadful recall. When he came into his father’s possessed presence, he was almost brought to his knees. The ominous feeling was so distinct, it prompted his mind to replay his mother’s death in vivid details. He did not want to believe his ears then, but there was no denying that he was facing the same person who had come to the town plaza that day. Anankos had made his father return to Hoshido and, in front of all of his children, use that evil blade to- to-

Takumi shouted in frustration.

Nothing made sense anymore. Thousands of impossible questions filled him with despair. He wished he could transform it into something else. Grief, rage, maybe delusional hope, anything to release the vibrating energy that was threatening to tear him to pieces.  

Anankos, the twisted creature, the once-lover of humanity… It had gone through great length to show how it could take everything from them in the cruelest way just as easily as it could give them everything they ever wanted. It had done its worst on his parents, what more would its perverse mind think up? What was left of their family or the Nohrians’ for it to- _Oh gods, gods…_

 _I have to talk to-to Leo, but n-not in this state._  He leaned heavily on a tree, gasping helplessly. His eyes felt dry and stung like they were filled with hot sand. He pressed his palms to them, but nothing was alleviated. In a last thread of clarity, he told himself that he had to return to the main ground before he foolishly collapses here.

Stumbling back to the fortress clearing, Takumi looked up to find the nearest sight of life. It was the light of the mess hall. It was still early in dinner time, but the sky had darkened quickly and the windows of the hall looked bright and warm. He slowly made his way to the building and was relieved to see no diner inside.

He followed the bland smell of food to the counter. No one was attending, so he knocked on the wooden surface. Right afterward, however, he was struck by the realization that he still looked fresh out of battle, filthy and disheveled. “I’ll return later!” he hastily said aloud to the empty place and turned to walk away.

But Peri popped out of the kitchen door right then. “Wait! Wait, Lord Takumi! We have your meal!” She cried urgently

“W-what?” Takumi asked, stopped in his track by her strange sentence.

“We have already prepared a meal for you. Please don’t leave!” Her voice was high with anxiety and she disappeared behind the door once more like a gust of wind.

Instinctively, Takumi started to wonder if he should make his escape in the meantime, but before he could move, Nyx had appeared under the door frame.

Her even gaze fixed him in place.

Peri returned with a tray full of little plates and bowls. “It’s still our normal foods, but Lady Hinoka and Lord Leo suggested this may help you, ehm, enjoy your meal more.”

There's no enjoying food for him right now, but Takumi didn't think about that. He kept standing there, two steps from the counter and staring. There were all the dishes that the mess hall had on its menu that night, put in smaller portions than usual. Together, they make up no more than the size of a normal meal, but variety meant that Takumi would be more likely to finish everything. Somewhere in his chaotic mind, his pride told him that this move was a little close to 'coddling’, but he would swallow his tongue before showing himself as ungrateful.

Swallowing hard several times, he murmured his thanks and picked the tray up. He carried it outside of mess hall and looked for a bench to hide himself in the shadow of the evening.

The smaller portions did help. He neither saw nor tasted the food, but his exhausted body still worked all of the required muscles for him. He was also thankful that it was Nohrian food night. Food from home would make his thoughts wander again, he reasoned, uncertain of how much grip on sanity he still had at that moment.

As people started to arrive at the hall, some recognized him in the dark. They nodded or waved to him, but none approached.  When he came inside the hall to return his tray, no one behaved differently. Nyx gave him a cup of tea that he didn't ask for. He gladly took it.

Meal time had left Takumi… less hysteric, he thought critically, even though he wouldn't say he was calm. Something in his heart was still looking for an answer or a sign of resolution, even though he knew the former would forever be out of reach. The yearning made him feel hollow, and he worried that he would not be ready enough for the next battles ( _How many more? Just how many?_ ). Warily, he dragged his feet up the stairs, his head hung low, his hands listlessly traced the wall and the handrail. He might as well have had his eyes closed, for he navigated only by memory. His careless steps led him to bump into steps and walls, he ignored the pain and his sloppiness.

Just as he reached his room, however, he stopped.

There was a bright streak of light across the corridor floor.

For some reason, Takumi stared at it for a long time, mutely studying the contrast between the slim band and the dark wood.

Then he looked up to his right, where the door to his brother's room was partly open. Through the narrow passage, he saw Ryoma sitting at the desk, wilting a rough block of wood, attentive and unfazed despite the block’s unrefinement. On one side of the desk, Xander sat watching.

One by one, little strips of wood fell away with the steady moves of Ryoma’s hands, mesmerizing Takumi. Sometimes his brother spoke in a low voice to Xander. Sometimes Xander replied, sometimes he did not. Sometimes his brother frowned deeply and pressed his lips together in a dark expression, and Xander would say something that make the tension slowly released. Through it all, Ryoma never stopped working. In the companionable quietness of the room, it seemed as if nothing was ever in horrible disarray and nothing would ever be. Like the ripples from a pebble could not mar the calm of a lake, the events of that day could never bring his brother down.

Takumi tore his gaze away, amazed by what he had seen, rattled by what he didn’t have. In that moment, serenity seemed so familiar yet elusive to him, like an answer that he had already gotten in his palm but had yet to even figure out the name. He wondered if it was because he was afraid of finding it.

Blinking rapidly, he finally looked at the rest of the hallway. Hinata and Oboro’s door were open as well, even Saizo’s and Kagero’s. Each of them was a clear invitation. He started to feel confused and, also, moved. Something hot began to rise in his throat again, threatening to overflow. For no reason at all, he turned to look behind. Maybe he fully expected it, maybe he was completely caught off guard, but there, through the wide-open door that connected to the Nohrian wing of the building, he saw strips of light from every room, telling him that he could come to seek comfort anywhere at anytime. His nose and eyes tingled as he looked down the bright hallway and carefully counted each door one more time. Even Xander’s door was open. At the entrance, the prince’s black cat raised her head and looked at him.

She rolled over with an expectant expression.

Leaving the tear drop to quietly roll down his check, Takumi padded over and crouched down to rub Mun’s tummy. She started to rub her head against his hand, so he pulled off his glove. Even though the hand had been covered, it was smudged with grit and sweat. Like any kitty onto her task, Mun rose with determination and started to lick his fingers.

“Hey hey, it’s dirty,” he said softly, moving his hand away. This did nothing to deter her, and she put her front paws on his thumb with determination to stop him from retreating.

Takumi was flustered, “No, Mun. I-I-.” And then he choked up.

Tears finally filled to the brim of his eyes. Takumi let them. As pressure pushed up in his lung, and he tried to make it spill over, letting it go so that it would let him go. Realizations started to clear the fog in his mind. He was very safe, wasn’t he? People would look after him, would listen to his words and needs. If he could discard his doubts, he would be one step closer to freedom. Selfishly, Takumi knew there was still a child in him that longed to be praised for being strong. For a long time, it had seemed to be the only thing he could aim for, the only solution for the kind of person he could become. It made him reluctant to admit what else he needed, to even look inside and see what he really yearned for. He was terrified of knowing himself, and refused his chances to understand others.

Today, in this moment, he could firmly tell himself that it was simply right if he cared more and be less. His feelings could no longer overwhelm his lines of reason.

They hurted still.  

After Takumi hid his hand away, Mun began to paw at him to find it. She circled him and tried to climb onto him from different angles, her little nose sniffed around his face and neck.

“You are going to break me,” he whispered with a smile, trying to joke to lessen the fact that he was openly crying. Giving her one last pat on the head, he stood up and quickly returned to his room.  

He went straight into the bathroom, activated the spell to reheat his bath and peeled off his armor. Once he climbed into the tub, he dipped his whole head into the water, letting the tears wash away with the rest of the day. He emerged with trembling breaths and stinging eyes, but the discomforts just made him chuckle. _You are here for the truths,_ he thought of his first conversation with Leo _, What do you want to come afterward?_ With eyes still squeezed shut and streaming with tears, he began to laugh. He laughed at his own silly stubbornness, then laughed for the relief that was finally pulling at the knot in his chest.

_Say, Leo, where do you find the strength to dream of what comes afterward?_

Takumi cleaned himself thoroughly. By the time he moved to cleaning his armor, he was feeling lighter by the minute. He finished this last task efficiently. The moment his back touched the futon, he fell asleep without any effort. He would have at least a small victory in this harrowing day.

*

_Takumi was walking down a dim corridor._

_His mind supplied that it was the corridor just outside of his room - keep moving forward, and he would see someone from Nohr. But no matter how many steps he took, how many passages well-lit by wall lamps he passed, he didn’t find anything._

_‘Is this one of those dreams where I have to make up my own path?’ he thought. He tried to dream up a door. A pleasant one. Who should he visit? Leo? Oh, he didn’t really care. He wouldn’t even mind Niles or Peri, not at all._

_‘Surprise me,” he willed at his dream, building up a little excitement. He wondered what his subconscious would show him._

_The corridor stopped at a red door._

_Panic shot through Takumi. ‘No no no, don’t do this.’ He turned around. He should return to his room and rest more, he thought._

_In front of him was a blue door. The lamps disappeared. The floor fell away._

_‘Make me proud, my son,’ a voice echoed from the darkness._

_‘T-That’s not what he said!’ Takumi shouted in his mind, trying to make the thought drown out everything that could be waiting to scare him. This was the fight now._

_He knew that if he turned around once more, there would be another blue door._

_‘You have always believed that he would say it like that.’ In front of him, the door knob started to turn on its own._

_‘If you think I would ruin my own sleep again-!’ Takumi shut down his vision, telling himself that there should only be darkness around him. He started to feel the paralysing pull of a nightmare that wanted him to stay still and watch, but he told his body to go up. Go away. Swimming, floating, whatever it was. ‘Go, you deadweight!’ he pushed his mind. He imagined that he had left everything below, that he could hear the creak of a door below him, a louder voice chasing after his feet. He told himself that it was unintelligible and he was not going to stop to hear better._

_But what would let him know that he had escaped? Washing adrift was not security, was it? He should find something, a sign to move on. Otherwise- otherwise he was still in the palm of the dream..._

_The doubt rocked his sense of balance. The force that had been keeping him afloat started to give. Shivering, he felt himself dragged toward a new direction. He scrambled to fight back against that as well. He was better than this, he reminded himself. He was not loss, he had a purpose and no need for a final destination. ‘Return yourself to the void. Find emptiness. Fear will perish the same way it was born,’ he chanted noiselessly._

Diving in and out of control, Takumi kept the monster at bay.

Sometime during the night, he faintly felt a warm hand placed on his forehead. Then a conversation of whispers occurred by his bed. In his sleepiness, he latched onto these new sensations, using them as anchors to relax further into slumber. He knew these voices were dear to his heart, even if he could not tell to whom they belonged or what they were saying. Even when he suspected that his visitors had left, contentment continued to echo in him.

He was beginning to question how long he had been sleeping when he sensed the coming of another nightmare. Like second instinct, his whole being fought against it. This time, he pulled himself all the way to the surface and managed to wake with only a dizzying headache and no memory of the beast that had loomed in his mind.

The sheet and blanket felt raw against his skin. Takumi rolled out of his futon and fumbled his way to open the door to the balcony, where cool air hit him in the face. He instantly inhaled deeply.  

He was wide awake now. His mind felt crystal clear for what seemed like the first time that day. Above him, the sky was clear for winter and lit by a waning moon, making a relatively bright background for the shadows of the trees down below. Takumi stared at these shapes, trying to see if bad thoughts would rise in him again.

As he scanned the scene, he noticed a strange sphere of light moving in the darkness at the same level as his eyes, on the other side of the building. Feeling spooked, he crouched down a bit and peered at it over the rail.

The small sphere moved a little, then became brighter and bigger at the same time as he heard a small creaking sound. It was the sound of a door opening.

The silhouette of Leo emerged from where his bedroom should be, the dim glow of light was close by his side. He came to the rail of his balcony and, after some consideration, slowly climbed onto the thick tree branch that extended nearby.

Takumi had to stop himself from shouting out a warning. It wasn’t the first time he saw Leo climbing a tree, but Leo had always managed to look terribly inexperienced. He was so slow that Takumi feared he had no idea what he was doing. Eventually, he did get into a stable position, sitting at the fork and leaning back to the trunk, one leg dropping down, one knee propping up. After a moment, his hand reached for the glowing sphere and apparently pulled it out from a bag at his side.

It was a book, which he started to read.

There were so many questions running through Takumi’s head that he thought by the time he could sort them out, Leo would probably have finished reading and gone back to bed. He didn’t feel alarmed, however; what sparks in his heart was fond curiosity. This was Leo, anything could happen where he was concerned, and they often turned out to be good.

But how should he approach Leo to avoid startling him? Takumi mentally went through all the tools and tricks he knew of, until an idea appeared, as good as any that could be dreamt up in the middle of the night. He crawled back into his room, blindly searched for the box of stationary and brought it out to the balcony. Using the moonlight, he groped for a piece of origami paper and a pencil. He spent a moment wondering whether a crane or a boat would look less bizarre floating toward the tree. He had to scold himself - any floating toy would look as out of place as Leo out there right now.

Blowing a gentle breath of magic into the simple boat, Takumi sent it off. The little thing leisurely sailed through the air, until it landed on the opening pages in front of Leo.

Leo’s head jerked up, and Takumi all but flattened himself onto the floor.

He didn’t dare to watch, didn’t even dare to imagine Leo’s expression, which he couldn’t see from this distance anyway. He turned to lie on his back and looked up at the moon, counting the wisps of cloud. A minute passed. Five? Ten? _Just what am I doing? This is where it should end,_ he thought cowardly. _Nothing will happen. I will just sleep here like this and let the night pass._ In a few hours, dawn would erase everything.

Not long after, however, the boat floated back to him just as the magic had guaranteed that it would. Takumi tightened his fist to prevent his hand from reaching up and catching it, fearing that the hand might show over the rail. He thought he could feel Leo’s eyes boring at where the boat was descending, but he didn’t want to provide further confirmation on his whereabouts.

The boat landed on his chest.

He breathed in deeply, then gingerly unfolded it.

 _Care to have a friend there? -T-_ was what he knew he had blindly written down in the dark. Now, a reply had been added under the line, thankfully with a magical glow so that it could be read without mistake. There was a single word.

 _Come_.

Takumi took another breath, then rolled through the door back into his room. He stood up, looked at his shoes, thought of the tree and decided to ignore footwear. Then he considered the door to the Nohrian wing of the building. It was so close, yet the idea of walking by his brother’s or Xander’s door at this time of the night made him shiver. And what if he got too nervous and come to the wrong door? What if Leo’s door was locked? He shook his head. He remembered leaving his own door open, but whoever came in earlier had closed it. Slowly, quietly, he pried open the wooden door, then stealthily ran downstairs and around the building to the backyard. Locating the tree was no problem, although climbing it under the piercing gaze of Leo made his heart skip too many beats for him to count.

By the time he arrived at the bough, Takumi’s face had gotten quite hot. He had no doubt that it was thoroughly red too.

“Hey,” he whispered.

“Really, Takumi?” Leo said in a cool voice, but there was no sting. He moved further in to give Takumi the comfortable space between his legs.

Takumi didn’t hesitate to lean back against Leo’s chest. “Well, I figured if you have to go all the way out here to read, it mustn’t be about reading,” he said.

Leo hummed, neither confirmed nor denied the guess. “How are you doing?” He asked softly

Takumi wondered if he could ever sum up his current state. He knew how he wished to appear though. “I really dislike nightmare,” he declared vehemently, as if casting a spell that would ward off unwanted dreams in the future. “Otherwise, I think I am doing well. Quite well, I would say.” He half-turned his face, “Did you come to my room earlier?”

“I… hovered outside the door. Sakura and Ryoma went in.”

“Just the three of you then?”

“Er, Elise, Corrin, Azura, Oboro, Tsubaki-”

Takumi swallowed. “All right all right, let me recover from that first,” _Just how long is this list?_ he made a face in the dark, and felt Leo chuckle into his hair. “I wasn’t that dramatic, was I?”

“You was not. I think the crowd gathered at Sakura’s room first, grew larger at Hinoka’s, then decided they might as well go to yours too.” Leo wrapped an arm around Takumi’s stomach. “I knew you wouldn’t have liked that. Camilla and Hinoka thought you'd want space too. I should have intercepted...” He sounded truly apologetic.

“I would be a brat to complain,” Takumi quickly said with a shrug. He felt guilty to be reminded that he used to react violently against getting fussed over.

“But are you really okay?”

“…I think I am not going to tumble down spirals of negative thoughts or wild concerns, so it is as well as I can hope for.” He waved his hands, wanting to make light of the situation.

Leo only made a noncommittal noise, like he wasn’t convinced but did not know how to proceed, and Takumi was thankful that Leo didn’t push. In truth, he felt as if he has been stuck underwater for a long time and, just now, found out that he could learn to dive. It was a little surreal, oddly thrilling, and scary still. Overnight, his impulse to fend off others’ concerns was no longer a strategy to avoid and close off. _I almost have it figured out, just wait a little more_ , he wanted to tell the world.  There’s suddenly an excitement within that made he want to share this new hope in himself with someone, but he had neither the word nor the courage for it.

So he sighed and sagged back more instead. With an impulse to be demanding, he tugged at Leo’s wrist and rearranged the hand resting on his side until he was pleased. He started to hum too, and began to pluck a few nearby leaves for no reason at all. His apparent relaxation finally earned him an amused huff from Leo.

“You are incredible, aren’t you?” Leo said in a warm voice, but no doubt raising his eyebrows.

“Woa, it’s your praise, scarcer than hen's teeth. Give more here,” Takumi retorted and threw the bunch of leaves over his shoulder, aiming for his friend’s face. Inside, though, what he felt was an incredible urge to run and hide, then more flusterment as he tried to temper this childish tendency to escape. _Stop talking like this is a big deal,_ he willed at Leo.

In another corner of his mind, he thought of the way Leo had presented his own stories of the Concubine War so orderly, the way so much feelings and efforts must have been poured into the practiced coolness that Leo used to treat those years of his life, with narrations rewritten over and over again in his head until the edges of fury and loss had dulled. It’s amazingly admirable, but Takumi  wished it didn't have to happen at all.

He would make sure that Leo never have to do that again. “Enough about me,” he patted Leo’s hand. “Why are you out here?”

Leo did not answer right away, so he added, “Consider it a way to distract me from what happened today.”

Leo sniffed. “My thoughts are highly inappropriate for that purpose.”

“You’ll be surprised.”

“Unlikely, Takumi.”

“Prove me wrong.”

Leo didn’t even respond, loss in thoughts once again. His thumb worried at the edge of Takumi’s sleeve.

Takumi could only wait.  

“I’m… processing some new thoughts about my father.” Leo finally said. After a moment of silence, it sounded like he was taking a deep breath and opening his mouth again, but nothing came.

Takumi couldn’t let him clam up like that. “I- I thought about him too,” he whispered.  

“Yes?” The reply was faint.

“There’s something about the way Anankos has been targeting us. And, I think, uhm, Camilla has sensed it before.”

Leo slowly nodded. “She and Xander talked with me when we were at the cottage. I think the general assumption is that we won’t be surprised if father shows up... soon. Actually, I am more concerned about the manner in which he will- will-” His hand gripped Takumi’s shirt. “I shouldn’t make you listen to this.”

“Hey, keep talking,” Takumi shoved his elbow a little.

“I mean, we know what to do if he appears with open hostility like Queen Arete did. But if it is something else, say, similar to your mother’s…”

_Ah._

“None of us know where our father ends and Anankos begins. I’ll admit, I have long stopped believing that something can be done for him. It seems so impossible. Whenever I think of the burdens that Xander and Camilla have to bear, I just don’t have the strength to spare for wild hopes anymore. I have a hunch that in their own ways, Xander and Camilla have made up their minds as well. On principle, though, to give up on him before the end is… Frankly, you must agree that I am contemptible for excusing myself in this.”

“I’m not,” Takumi said forcefully. “Listen, I’m not.”

Leo just leaned his head on Takumi’s shoulder and continued: “Not to mention that we have to prepare Elise for all scenarios as well.”

Takumi placed his hand on Leo’s. “Fate is forcing you and many people know that.”

Leo sighed. “It’s probably the grand scale of whatever that fate is that’s overwhelming me.  In a way, it has been obvious from the moment we left Windmire that an ugly ending is inevitable.  Even if he is somehow cured, the future is bloodshed. What we have done should have us dead several times over, royals or not, saving his life or not. If, instead, he abdicates and Xander takes the throne, then we must bring him to justice, and there's only one possible outcome for that.” He huffed, then clicked his tongue. “It is exactly as hypocritical as it sounds, by the way. It’s just that, at that stage, if either side is not ruthless enough, the court of Nohr will tear both of us to pieces.”

Takumi was speechless for some time. On his back, Leo’s weight was warm and heavy with resignation. Finally, he said: “Tell me if I am being foolishly impractical, but when the political storm break in Nohr, Hoshido will stand with you.”

“I know,” Leo said softly, then laughed a little. It was broken, but the sudden sound brought more relief to Takumi than he expected. “Funnily enough, Xander told me that too. I haven’t been able to imagine how well that will work, but if he believes then I believe.” He hummed. “See, this is why thinking too much is counterproductive. What I should do out here is working on restraining my wayward mind.”

“Let me know when you find the magical pill. I need a good dose of that.”

“…I may have found one, but you can’t take it. Just now, I forgot my worries when I knew you were coming.” Leo’s usual mocking tone returned. “What a diverting effect you have.”

“Oh, is that another real praise? Poorly phrased, but I’ll take what I can.” Takumi snickered. “It’s fine, I like myself better when I’m with you too.”

“‘Too’ huh? Now that’s bordering arrogance,” Leo said and started a tickle battle.

The shock jolted Takumi “Easy, bastard!” He wriggled. “Are you trying to fall?!”

In response, Leo suddenly hugged him tightly with both arms. “It was stupid of you to come here,” he said in a low voice.

“Say what?”

“I was silly to reply to you, but you should have gone back to bed instead.”

“What is the problem with you now?” Takumi turned as much as he could, but wasn’t able to make out the expression on Leo’s face.

And then Leo buried his face in Takumi’s hair. “You shouldn’t have run all the way out here in the middle of the night, in your nightwear and without shoes, just because of some stupid thing I do.” His breaths fluttered on Takumi’s nape, shuttering along with the uneven voice. “When I saw you under this tree, I knew that even though I’d never be able to find the adequate words, I must tell you how precious you are to me.”

Takumi’s heart leapt.

“Now you have made me say ill-timed things twice this night. I want to smother myself to oblivion with a pillow,” Leo mumbled miserably.

But Takumi was too busy thinking to comfort him. He was filled with surprise for a moment, then in the next one he forgot about it. A sense of understanding was unfurling within him, overlapping with reassurance and bringing with it a pleasant warmth that spread from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He became keenly aware of the reluctant hold that Leo had around him and the rapid heartbeats that were echoing through his back. He had no idea what to say, but  his first instinct was to pinch himself for being a lucky duck. For all the ups and downs of that day, he wanted to grin from ear to ear all the way to next month.

On a whim, he tilted his head back and reached his hand behind, trying to feel Leo’s cheek. Leo protested by pressing his face even harder against Takumi’s shoulder.

“Now now, let me- let me learn you,” Takumi whispered.

“You are killing me here,” Leo exhaled.

When, finally, Takumi's fingertips brushed by Leo’s neck, he could almost sense from the heat that it must be bright pink, as pink as his own blush right now. With a slightly giddy mind, he thought about how he wouldn’t be able to find the words to describe his happiness either.

So instead of chasing after them, he took a pale hand into his and brought it to his lips. “Tell me what you wish to, Leo, I’m listening.”

*

They talked until Leo was in danger of falling asleep on the tree, then climbed back into Leo’s room to sleep properly. When Takumi opened his eyes again, the sky had turned grey. His body was aching a little from both the fighting and almost ten hours of lying down ‒ there was also the kind of itch that made him thought of how good it would feel to get up right then and run a few laps around the fort.

Like the sky after a storm, the tumults that had gathered in his heart the day before had cleared away. Although he wasn’t confident enough to say that he would easily find steadiness again, at least he had tasted it once. Now, he had seen both the enemy and the goal, had learnt both defeat and victory.

He was in good shape, he thought with optimism.

Leo was close by his side, breathing deeply and regularly. He should wake up soon. Resisting the impulse to start petting Leo, Takumi turned his body a little toward the edge of the bed to get into a more comfortable position. His eyes flickered around the room as he idly waited.

They rested on the headband on the nightstand.

Feeling curious, he picked the black metal band up for inspection for the first time. It was lighter and warmer that it looked. When he turned it under the dim light of the room, he saw something like an inscription inside the curve. For some time, he stared at it, watching the faintest threads of light catching on the fine edges.

Next to him, Leo stirred and nuzzled into his shoulder. “Hey,” Takumi greeted without facing him. The reply was a soft hum.

Takumi traced his finger on the engraved words to read them better. “To protect the strong,” they said. He wasn’t sure what he should think of them.

A little while later, Leo said in a sleepy voice: “There’s protective magic in there, quite powerful too.” In a clearer one, “You get one like this if you live past sixteen.”

Takumi lightly shuddered. “But Corrin doesn’t have one?” he asked.

Leo was quiet for a moment. “Maybe the question should be why she never wondered about not getting one,” he chuckled bitterly. “When we asked, father said that she had not proven herself. We regretted asking.”

He reached out a hand, wrapped it around Takumi’s and caressed the band with a thumb. “Even after I came here, I still put this on my head everyday.” He let out a long sigh. “Time to time, we have suspected these things to contain some hidden spells. A monitoring one, for example. We have never found anything though, even Nyx has checked them and declared them innocent. Each time I am reassured of that, I tell myself that I should wear this to make use of its magic, but… but I believe that my habit is rooted in something deeper than that. Residual attachment, maybe.”

Leo’s breath was hot on Takumi’s neck. “For all that he had made us suffer, we still remember the times he seemed to act like our protector, twisted as the methods might have been.”

 _And all three of you will wear Garon’s bestowals into the battle against him,_ Takumi thought. Sighing, he turned around to hug Leo. “I am getting you a new hair band when we are done with this war,” he offered his meager solution.

Leo just laughed dryly. “You and your eagerness to better everything. Sure, I’ll wear whatever you give me… if it is good enough.”

“Ungrateful bastard!” Takumi huffed. He shoved the pillow into Leo’s face and pinched his stomach through the night clothes; as Leo started to choke on his own laughter, Takumi decided to run his fingers through his boyfriend’s hair and thoroughly mess it up for good measure.

“So barbarous,” Leo tried to snort but the sound turned into a giggle. Quickly, he wriggled away and pulled the blanket over his head to cover himself. “Truce, truce. Let me offer a piece of information for temporary peace.”

“You will surrender the information,” Takumi yanked the blanket corner to get under as well.  He came nose to nose with Leo in the sultry darkness. “Speak and redeem yourself,” he commanded with a whisper.

Leo was silent for a moment. When he whispered back, his voice has lost the playful edge, “Corrin talked to us last night. She has a suspect.”

It took Takumi a moment to catch up. “…For the spy?”

Leo said a name.

Takumi was stunned.

The first thing he could say was: “How does Corrin feel about this?”

“She expressed disbelief but not denial,” Leo said. “It is telling that although her suspicion is yet proven, she decided to speak to us so that we could provide inputs and ready ourselves. I think she has also realized that Anankos’s is fixated on attacking what, hmn, tie us together.”

 _Our ties are the only thing we can rely on to carry us forward._ Takumi curled himself around Leo. “Is it possible that he is also possessed?”

“We can't be sure. If he is, then he has been wearing a perfect mask, much better than my father’s. Or he… he could be exploited. I don’t know.”

“That would make sense, considering how my parents’ personalities were c-contorted while they were under evil influence.”

Takumi felt a gentle kiss on his chin. "Then I wish that we will be able defeat that influence and bring him back. There’s still hope for him,” Leo said. With some difficulty, he continued, “There is one scenario in my mind that I did not tell you earlier. I think- I think even if my father can be cured, he won’t forgive himself for what have been done by his hands, if not because of shame then because of pride. That is who he… was.”

Taking a deep breath, Takumi embraced Leo tightly. This time, he did not try to suggest a hopeful morrow. He understood that Leo had resolved to let go.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ‘Takumi rolling out to the balcony and seeing Leo climbing tree’ was one of the first scenes I wrote for this fic. For some reason I just wanted them to have some physical actions…


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I guess 5% of this whole fic is about sleeping and 10% of it is people bathing...

_Some doors close so that others open._

_Some doors close to leave questions unresolved, and the shape of hope to be molded by our hands._

*****

Leo thought he couldn’t be more prepared. In a sense, he was correct. It was already too lucky of them to be able to have Gunter back. As for his father-

They never had a chance to fight for him. Leo should have known from the moment the familiar figure appeared before Anankos.

“Father!” The word spilled from him unbidden. Before he knew it, he had jumped down from his horse and ran closer to the dais. He could not believe in his eyes, in the insane words that his father was saying. “Father!” he cried.

Garon didn’t spare them a glance. Boisterously, he offered to stand with the mad god, and what answered him were strings after strings of delirious laughter. The rings echoed incessantly across the empty hall, dwarfing Leo in a sinister grip. He could feel the vibrations penetrated to his lungs; the pressure made his eyes sting.

Maybe he called for many more times, maybe his voice was only pleading in his head. Whatever happened, it didn’t change a thing.

Then he felt someone moving near behind. “King Garon!” Xander bellowed. The sheer force in the sound temporarily immobilized Leo.

And the hint of a crack stabbed him in the gut. Xander was appealing to one last thing that could pull their father back.

It was all in vain. As if time had slowed down, everything happened in front of Leo’s eyes like he was watching through a looking glass, too close yet too far from him. The beastly mask of Anankos cracked open to reveal endless darkness. A foul gush of wind pushed against them. When it was gone, so was the King of Nohr.

This time, all that they heard were the echoes of a scream.

Everything was too abrupt. Absurd. Final. Dazedly, a part of Leo told him that he was watching the world coming to an end, as if fate was willing him to just stand there and wait for death. Without truly thinking, his mind fast-forwarded to the inevitable conclusion. _Get it over with now. I can’t. I can’t escape-_

A loud _Clank_ shocked him out of that line of thought. Next to him, Xander was leaning heavily on Siegfried. Slowly, his brother turned to him. “Tell me, Leo.” Xander blinked at him. “Tell me… I don’t have to think about this right now,” he said in a strange voice.

Like a switch had been flipped, blood started to rush back into Leo’s brain. “Don’t‒!” All that came out was a hoarse gasp, his throat felt like solid rock. Leo tried to swallow several times to no avail. _Breathe. Breathe!_ He had to command his body to shake up and shout in order to get his voice out: “Don’t think about it!” He grabbed his brother’s forearm tightly, both to calm himself down and to guide Xander a few steps back, until they were by the side of their loved ones again. The proximity helped tremendously. Gradually, Xander gathered himself and Leo’s movements became less difficult.

Next to them, Camilla was holding Elise tightly, her face white and her lips pressed firmly. Elise’s hands were shaking as she clutched Camilla’s arms, but she did not hide her face away from the horrific scene. When she caught Leo’s gaze, she even tried to nod to reassure him.

As Leo dropped his hand, Xander briefly took his wrist and squeezed; they exchanged a glance. The moment he mounted Ishtar, Xander was the greatest paladin of Nohr again. “Give the word, Corrin,” he adjured with the power of a king to be.

If Corrin was much shaken by the throughout erasure of her father, she was still strong enough to refocus on the present situation. _Even stronger_ , Leo thought. The fire in her eyes burned bright once more, spreading warmth throughout his body. She raised her sword high to make the last war cry.

As if deeming them worthy, the blade of Yato glowed brilliantly, calling out the legendary weapons to realize their destiny.

*

The funny thing was _,_ Leo would think later, that there really wasn’t any story to tell about this battle _._ It’s true that Anankos was monstrous in all of its three forms, that they had circled through all of the most negative emotions and picked themselves up every single time in order to defeat it, but the moment the silent god dispersed into stardust, there was only one thought that shot clean through the throbbing pain in his head, all wrong yet completely right: _We were meant to win._

And only one emotion in his chest: the joy of living. Screaming along with the deafening cheers around, he haphazardly threw Brynhildr into his saddle bag, jumped down onto the ground and ran toward the nearest person he could see.

Sakura squealed in delight as he picked her up and twirl her around. “You are the best partner! Absolutely best!” Leo laughed in drunken happiness. A second later, both of them were rocked by the arrival of another hugger. Leo put an arm around Elise’s back to support her as she jumped up and wrapped herself around him.

He turned his head around to see everyone embracing each other with wide grins on their faces, laughter spilling from their lips and tears falling from red eyes. There was barely a coherent sentence around, just roaring cheers and shuttering words broken by too much excitement.

“Look! Look at Oboro!” Elise cried as she looked over Leo’s shoulder. Still holding the girls, he turned back to gain a better view. Just a few steps from them, Oboro was trying for what looked like a friendly arm clasp with Peri, while Peri kept pushing to get a close hug and, at the same time, crying double rivers of black mascara down her face. Judging by Oboro’s panicking face, the wrestle match promised a tragic end for her. On his part, however, Leo had no qualm laughing at her plight.

On the other hand, when he saw Effie moving toward them with a similar intent for friendly contact, the last reasonable bit of his survival instinct quickly willed him to release both girls and step back. There’s no doubt that the knight would be a much gentler weight to them than if he was included.

Somehow, this absurd calculation was the final nudge that pushed Leo over the edge. He doubled down laughing, until his eyes were blurry and he was hiccupping. “Oh my, please don’t break, my love.” He heard Camilla’s voice next to him and felt her hand patting his back. Trying to control his snickers, he straightened up to gather her in his arms. “A little breaking won’t harm me,” he mumbled into her ear. “I feel fantastic.”

He felt another warm weight came to drape over his back and wrapping him in an embrace he knew well. “I, personally, wouldn’t mind sleeping for a week right now,” Takumi tiredly declared. His arms around Leo felt firm and tight though.

Camilla chuckled. “Let’s get out of this wasteland.”

When the excitement had finally become manageable, they filtered back into the hall of Gyges. It was lifeless, except for the dying magic torches on the walls. For some reason, Xander began to slowly wander among the rubbles, looking under pieces of broken walls here and there. Finally, he stopped at one spot and crouched down. When Leo walked around, he saw what his brother was staring at.

The crown of Nohr.

There was nothing else around to suggest that their father was ever there; the survival of the crown itself seemed almost eerie. Xander reached out to pick it up, but the thing pretty much crumbled under his touch, breaking into dozens of pieces and fell back onto the floor. The jarring sounds made Leo’s spine tingle.

As if willed by a mysterious force, everyone around stood still and watched.

After some contemplation, Xander took off his right-hand glove. He pulled out a handkerchief ‒ slightly smudged with dirt and blood but still whole ‒ and opened it on his palm to judge the size.

Hinoka stepped to his side and took off her scarf. “If you are not bothered by the stains…”

“Not at all. Thank you very much.” Xander gratefully accepted the offer. He carefully put the pieces of metal on the cloth and folded up a bundle. Once the final knot was neatly tied, however, he unceremoniously dropped it on the floor and sat down. Turning his head up to look at Camilla and Corrin, he gave a long and loud sigh. “That’s one thing done, I guess.” He said with what Leo was surprised to identify as a sense of… gripe. “Look at all the work we have to do next.”

Camilla looked down at Xander with fond eyes. She lifted his circlet off and ruffled his hair affectionately. Azura huffed out a laugh and came over, offering him both hands to help him up, which he took. “Play now, work later, brother dear,” she said.

“Let’s just appreciate our journey thus far,” Corrin patted his back. “Live a little. I mean, live in oblivion a little.” She grinned broadly. “Let a few days pass, once your body has rested and you can look back with fresh eyes, I’m sure you will feel great. I'm already thinking that I’m living the best moments of my life.”  

Xander finally smiled. “Do you realize how close that is to saying ‘It’s all downhill from here’, Corrin?” he teased, then chuckled when Corrin pursed her lip. “Never mind me, negative outlook is my specialty,” he shook his head. “You must ignore me while I get over it myself.”

“But wait! We can’t let you do that!” Corrin cried. “Share your worries. How bad can they be? They can’t be worse than what we have gone through, right?”

“Oh, I wouldn’t try to compare,” Xander said with a hint of mirth in his weary eyes. “But I will spare you the details of my thoughts. I would make a very mean brother to rain on your parade right now.”

It was a bait that Corrin readily took in the heat of the moment. “Aww, try me then. We have just defeated a god, what task could frighten us after such a colossal feat?” she asked.

“Very well, let me think and pick a good one,” Xander spoke evenly, “Hmn, for example, accounting for all arguments, mostly that you have little magic and there’s nothing around here within a week’s travel, I think you will have to move the capital to a new place, little princesses.”

Corrin and Azura’s faces fell at once.

Xander made a show of shrugging. “Or maybe that’s not so hard at all. Just find a nice rich place and settle down among good neighbors-”

“Lalalalalala I’m not listening. I’m not listening!” Corrin finally shouted over his voice and shook her head violently. She clung to Azura’s shoulders. “Sing me a song that makes me forget!”

Azura giggled and gave Xander a thumb up. “No one will ever call you mean, brother. Now we know that you have always held back for the sake of our sanity.”

“He will be extra nice to compensate for the dreadful part, you know,” Ryoma said as he walked toward them. “He will write his list of highly recommended actions in perfect calligraphy on scented and patterned paper for you. You will be surrounded by beauty and comfort whenever you read it. With dread.”

Azura made sure to smile brightly. “It’s okay. I’ll find solace in not being the most miserable person in the house: at least I’m not going to be queen.”

“Hey, we haven’t settled that matter yet, Azura. I haven’t agreed!” Corrin protested.

“Five golds Lady Azura will get her way,” Niles said in a clipped voice.

“Ten,” Ryoma chipped in. He glanced at Sakura as she raised three fingers. “Three from Sakura. Or is that thirty?”

“Oy!”  

“Oh no,” Camilla cooed teasingly, “It’s time for you to leave the nest. I’m going to be so lonely, Corrin.”

“You’re pushing me out of the nest to let me fall on my head!” Corrin stuck her tongue out. “All right, I’ll eat my words! Give me five minutes to breathe, will you?! Not another word about work until I allow it. That’s a command, with an extra 'please’.”

“Don’t worry too much, sister. Some of us will be around for a while to help you,” Leo said. “I’ve already decided to leave Niles behind.”

“No!” Niles cried.

“Yes!!!” Takumi shouted and high-fived Leo.

“My lords!” Niles ran over and enveloped both of them in a fierce hug. Takumi faked choking sounds.

And the laughs around them became so hysteric Leo couldn’t even hear his own.

\----------

\----------

Hinoka prided herself as someone who always bathed with astounding speed, so it was with no little surprise that she found Camilla already lolling around on her bed when she stepped out of her bathroom.   

“Hinoka, love,” Camilla smiled brilliantly. She quickly rolled off the bed and stood up, looking too agile for someone who had just fought through twenty hours of hell. “Are you tired? Do you feeling like lying down?” She wrapped an arm around Hinoka’s waist.

Hinoka rested her head on Camilla’s shoulder and took in her sweet scent. “Hngn, I think my body won’t protest a little nap, but my brain is probably still in fighting mode.” She turned her face up a little, brushing her nose against Camilla’s cheek. “How are you so energetic?”

“I’m no different from you, it's just that I think it’s unnecessary to force myself to sleep right now. What do you think about doing something a little unconventional?”

“Such as what?”

“Would you be interested in joining me in the hot spring?” Camilla gestured at a basket laying on the floor next to the door. “I have prepared light snacks for us to enjoy there as well.”

“Um, what?” Hinoka blinked.

She continued to ask the same question at least four more times, all the while obediently followed Camilla to the hot spring and changed out of the clothes she had put on but ten minutes prior. When they finally dipped into the pool, Hinoka gasped out in bliss. The water was a few degrees hotter here compared to her bath, and that made a big different. A soak would no doubt do her wonders.

“Where did you find the wisdom to do this?” She asked a rhetorical question. Camilla knew everything.

Camilla opened the basket and started to arrange a tea set for two on the pool side, complete with fruits and biscuits. When she saw Hinoka staring with wide eyes, she smiled, “I am a creature of pleasure.”

Hinoka snorted at that. “Among other terrifying things.” She briefly closed her eyes and could not help humming a little.

Camilla sat down on the step in the pool, then pulled Hinoka over until she had Hinoka sitting sideway on her laps. It was embarrassing but undeniably lovely. Hinoka decided to indulge in the moment. She let Camilla fix the tea for her, but put her foot down on getting hand-fed the treats.

Camilla wrapped her arms around Hinoka’s waist. “It is my principle to restore normalcy as soon as possible after a crisis. I cheer to health and hug those I love.”

“This sounds like something you developed after too many drunken nights in Xander’s room.”

Camilla chuckled lowly. “Very smart guess.” Her hands lightly traveled up Hinoka torso, thumbing ghost circles on the skin there. The comfort made Hinoka exhale and relax further into her hold.

“You may think that I’m decisive, but I also tend to dwell. You have seen how that’s not always good,” Camilla spoke softly and leaned her forehead on Hinoka’s shoulder. “I like your way much better. You may chase one goal for years and years, yet when you let go, you let go. Clean and well.”

“That’s gross oversimplification,” Hinoka said.

Camilla looked up and laughed a little, “You are right. It was probably the exhaustion speaking just now, it makes me all melodramatic.”

“Everyone is entitled to have strange thoughts after what we have just lived through,” Hinoka soothed her, “I would be happy if you forget about them soon though. After a night of sleep, for example.”

“Or over a cup of tea, I should aim for that,” Camilla smiled and reached for her drink.

“Fix the world, sip the tea, all in a day’s work for Her Illustrious Highness,” Hinoka teased, then made a face at her own words. Camilla threw her head back and laughed. “That’s so stuck-up even I am getting goosebumps,” she said through her snickers. “Now now, what about you, O great general? What grand plan awaits you in Hoshido?”

“Whatever Ryoma needs me for, whatever I can do to help Nohr,” Hinoka shrugged. Then she looked straight into Camilla’s eyes. “And anything that lead me to you. I promised.”

“So serious and sincere, that’s my love,” Camilla said, caressing Hinoka’s face. “I know I’ve talked big about leaving court life, but I suspect that I will miss it if I do. The heart is a contradicting thing, just the thought of seeing you wielding power is enough to excite me, and when I see how determined Takumi and Sakura are about helping us… How I want to stay and watch you all work miracles.”

On a whim, Hinoka playfully blew on Camilla’s nose, hoping to chase the hint of somberness away. It worked a little. “I’m not exactly the type to speak of optimism,” she said. “Still, I think you can have a lot more than you assume. Be our advisors when you are home, be our eyes to the world when you travel, be a reminder of the peace within when you choose seclusion. Take as many steps back as you want when you are tired of charging into battles.  I can’t think of a scenario where you are less than dear to everyone’s heart, just like there certainly isn’t one in which I won’t follow you in the end.”

Camilla blinked at her, then chuckled. “You finally said it with the force you truly feel. I was at my worst when I told you of my expectations. They were terribly negative, I thought that you would clearly disagree with me, yet you were so… yielding.”  

Hinoka smiled wryly. “My point was not to oppose you. You are so smart, if there was a logical argument that could sway you, I think you would have already debated it in your head. I only hoped to lower your defense first.” To soothe the burning worry, to stay as close as possible, to wait out the storm together.

“Oh my. Listen to her, opening my heart up like a pomegranate,” Camilla shook her head and huffed.

Hinoka turned and pressed her palms along Camilla’s shoulder blades, searching for tight knots and started to knead. Camilla made a low noise in her throat, an audible exhale escaped her lips. She buried her nose into Hinoka’s neck and loosely kissed the skin there. Hinoka was already overheated in the water, but she still felt every single hot sigh, every absent-minded flick of tongue. They made her head feel light. She looked around the misty bathroom, her eyes lingered at the columns of afternoon sunlight shining down. For the first time, she understood what it felt like to have everything she wanted. _We have done it. From now on, we will make our own future._

Brushing back the soft locks of hair, Hinoka cupped Camilla’s face in her hands, and Camilla just leaned back and tilted her head up with no question. Her cheeks were flushing beautifully, her lips stretched in a serene smile, her eyes carried a dreamy look as she gazed up at Hinoka. The most content, unguarded face of a goddess if Hinoka had ever seen one. It made her want a lot of things, such as- such as-

“Why, Hinoka,” Camilla spoke softly, tracing her fingertips along Hinoka’s lips. “You have a wonderful expression on your face. Teach me how to keep it there.”

Against all reasons, Hinoka felt herself blushing instantly. Furiously. Pleasantly. She leaned down until their noses brushed.  

“I- I don’t know. Have you tried kissing?” She whispered.

Camilla’s answers were many and lovely.

\----------

\----------

By the time they arrived back at the fortress, Takumi was struggling to keep his eyes open. The wobble in his legs was visible enough that Leo walked behind him the entire time he climbed up the stairs. Takumi wanted to turn around and said that he wasn’t going to fall to his death now, but that sounded like too much work.

Leo followed him to his room as well and added another pairs of hand into removing his armors. It didn’t necessarily make the process faster, but Takumi appreciated Leo’s presence immensely.

When he saw the steaming bathtub in the bathroom, he said honestly: “It looks really comfy. I think I will pass out and drown,”

Leo didn’t laugh at him. “Do you want to sit outside and let me pour water over you?”

“Is the floor drain good enough for that?”

Leo raised his hand and gave Takumi a look. “I’m a sorcerer. I have ways.”

Ten minutes later, Takumi was groaning with pleasure under the strong flow of hot water that Leo was pouring for him. It had helped waking him up considerably. Using a cloth to rub over himself, he said: “I am so terribly sore; it’s like everything on my body is about to fall out of its socket. I would understand if it’s the day after I roll down a mountainside or something; this just doesn’t make sense.”

A moment later, an idea hit him - a little light flashing in his foggy mind. He looked up at Leo. “I’m suspecting it’s because of Fujin Yumi.”

“You think?” Leo tucked the locks of hair that had fell into his face for him.

Takumi thought of his past experiences and frowned. “I used to think that the aches I get right after practice or battles mean I’m not sturdy enough. This level of pain is beyond normal though. Now that I recall, after Fujin Yumi reacted with Yato for the first time at the Sevenfold Sanctuary, it was more draining to shoot. The feeling became severer today as well. I didn't realize that before because my mind was focusing elsewhere.”

Leo pondered over this matter while Takumi dried his hair. “Hmn, that might explain why my headache is more annoying than usual,” he said at last, his voice even.

Takumi started. “Why didn’t you say sooner?” He impatiently reached forward and began to undress what Leo still had on. “You used more magic just now too. Quick, wash yourself then rest.”

Leo sighed and raised his hands to aid with the process “Nah, we can take our time. Lying down sometimes makes it worse. I’m used to thinking harder to forget about pain,” he said. Under Takumi’s insistent urge, however, he let Takumi do all of the remaining work. As he sat down in the newly drawn bath, he continued the earlier thread of conversation. “I think the headaches used to put me in extra irritating mood as well. I wasn’t a very nice kid to be around on those days.”

“I didn’t notice anything like that after the earlier battles.”

Leo smirked. “Are you going to say that it’s because I’m never a nice kid?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth,” Takumi pouted.

Leo obediently sat still while Takumi slowly lathered his hair. The golden strands were fine yet strong, Takumi very much enjoyed feeling them between his fingers. He focused on this for a while before saying: “Whenever the soreness from using Fujin Yumi bothered me, I felt like I was being a whiny brat.” _Which is how I saw myself most of the time anyway._

Leo chuckled and leaned back further. “Even if we stand in a round room, we would still be able to think ourselves into a corner.”

“Or we would dig a hole and crawl in,” Takumi added. “…I wonder what our brothers experience.” Thinking about this startled him a little. Guessing his brother’s mood was something quite beyond his confidence.  

Leo didn’t reply immediately. When he did, his voice was subdued, “Ever since I started watching Xander, I have learnt that he grows quieter after battles.”

Takumi was reminded of the extreme personalities that Anankos had driven his parents and Gunther to. “Maybe the strength of these weapons wasn’t the only reason they caused endless wars. If it had to do with the mind, there’s no wonder the Rainbow Sage couldn’t stop it.”

“So I guess I was wrong then? Maybe using the legendary weapons do have palpable effects on us,” Leo said, referring to their old discussion. He slid a little lower into the water. “I hope it hasn’t been too bad for Corrin. Yato is the strongest one after all.”

“At least she hasn’t wielded it for very long.”

Leo suddenly let out a mocking laugh. “Except that it draws power from our weapons. What if it draws in our negative emotions as well?”

“Okay okay, stop that line of imagination.” Takumi shivered. “I will shut up about this too. War sucks, in short. Good thing we are all in this together.”

“We will have plenty of time to analyse what happened later,” Leo leaned back and hummed. Then he exhaled; his shoulders visibly dropped.

 _I don’t mind never analysing these things again,_ Takumi thought. He leaned down and pressed his lips on Leo’s shoulder. It might be important to understand the dark sides of these weapons, but after what they had finally achieved, he’d much rather throw such concerns away.

Following an impulse, he nipped at the smooth skin under his lips.

Leo just chuckled at him. “No more fighting, can you believe that?” He said lightly.

“Well I-,” Takumi began, but then stopped. ‘Fighting’ had been a part of him ever since father and Corrin were taken from their family. He had no clear memory of a life without war thoughts - violent thoughts that he himself fed and kept alive. As for Leo-

_No more aiming for mere survival. No more fearing for others’ lives. No more forcing yourself to harm and kill._

Let that sink in.

It made him bury his nose deeper into Leo’s neck.

He felt Leo patting his hair. “Are you all right? Is your brain finally failing?”

“No, I’m just thinking that you should be ambitious.”

“ _I_ should be ambitious? Pray tell.” Leo laughed.

“I mean, you have done more than just weathering through a long nightmare,” Takumi raised his head and spoke. “You have done everything you could along the way in hope for the best possible outcome, now your efforts will start to bear fruits. Just clear away the debris, and then… then you can build all the things you have been wanting to build, help the people you have been wanting to help.”

Leo stuck out his tongue. “That sounds really sweet, but it’s about the same as telling me to spend all the money that I don’t actually have.”

“You will have that money, if you truly want it.” Takumi said evenly. “Between our kingdoms, we’ll figure out.”

Leo glanced back at him curiously, then blinked as Takumi's expression remained calm and certain. He raised his eyebrows and fully turned around, put his folded arms on the edge of the bathtub, and leaned his chin on it. “You are seriously talking about a bright sweet future, aren’t you?” His eyes sparkled beautifully.

Takumi touched their foreheads together. “Don’t try to paint me as being naive and ridiculous. I am saying that your pragmatism needs a big update. I know that you have big dreams kept in suspension. Well, wakey wakey, time to rise and roar.”

“You-” Leo stared at him. Then a big grin split across his face, his eyes crinkled as he sniggered. “I can’t believe I’m being reminded by you.” He threw his arms around Takumi’s neck. “And… and you are so right it’s surreal.”

Takumi hugged back tightly, his tiredness melted into contentment. “Don’t drown yourself in work either. As for myself, I only wish that there’ll be happy time for us.”

“Ah, but that’s a given.” He felt Leo smile against his cheek.

 

\----------

\----------

Ryoma was literally rolling around in bed when Takumi knocked on his door. Ever since they came back to the fortress, he had felt strangely restless despite the physical exhaustion. There was nothing other than lying down for him, and he needed this period of recuperation as much as anyone else in camp, yet it was as if ants were marching under his skin. His muscles itched with anticipation and his mind searched for stimulation. It was very close to battle lust, the kind of temptation that Ryoma would admonish himself for ever feeling weak against.  

It was thus that any distraction was welcome. The moment he heard Takumi’s step stopped in front his room, he was already standing up.

“Woa-!?!” Takumi jumped when Ryoma opened the door before the second knock could happen. “Bro- Are you heading somewhere? Are you feeling okay?”

The second question puzzled Ryoma in turn. “…Of course I am? Can I help you with something?”

“Ah, uhm,” Takumi fidgeted and clasped his hands together. His expression changed, as if his mind was switching etween entirely different topics. “It’s nothing urgent but, eh, Leo and I are not sure we are the best choices to do this, so do you mind…” He waved his hand vaguely and, seemingly running out of patience with himself, rolled his eyes in self-mock. “I’m sorry. Just follow me.”

Ryoma would have laughed out loud if he wasn’t so intrigued. He held back on inquiring and did as Takumi asked of him. It didn’t take him long to get some clues – as he looked along the corridor to the Nohrians’ side of the building, he saw Leo lingering outside of Xander’s room.

Leo just looked at him and tilted his head at the open door with a hopeful expression.

When Ryoma arrived, Leo pulled him closer and whispered: “He has done every housekeeping task he could find around yet nothing to take care of himself. I think his brain might be in overload.”

Ryoma stepped into the room and started to understand Leo’s point. Xander’s armor had been cleaned _and_ polished. Not only was the room extra tidy, it looked like Xander had taken out every book, notebook, and paperwork that he had and sorted them out on the desk.  

Then he found Xander in the bathroom, staring down at the steaming bathtub, hands on hips, brows pressed together, and still dressed in gambeson and chausses.

At least he was barefoot - that was one positive sign. “Xander,” Ryoma walked over and rubbed his back. The only response he got was a small ‘hmnnn’.

After another stretch of non-reaction, Ryoma made an executive decision. He sat down on the edge of the bathtub so that Xander could see him and started to undress his lover with efficiency.

Xander slowly raised his hands and grabbed Ryoma’s wrists to stop him. Ryoma looked into his eyes and said: “Let me help.”

“Give me a moment to think,” Xander said in a faraway voice,

“The water will get cold.”

“……I can use the reheat spell anytime.”

Ryoma raised his eyebrows, “Do you realize that it has just taken you five seconds to make a simple reply?”

Xander stared at him some more. “Time is flowing differently in my head right now,” he said, seemingly to explain.

Leo poked his head in from the door. “You had the same conversation with me fifteen minute ago, Xander. Look at the spell; you have reheated that bath four times now. I think you are doing it like an automatic chore, not because you intend to bathe.”

Xander did not look at the spell. He just stared at the two young princes hovering at the doorway, then looked between them and Ryoma several times.

“I have drawn a crowd, haven’t I?” He finally uttered.

Ryoma took Xander’s hands into his. “Do you think you can try suppressing unwanted thoughts a little more? You did it during the battle, maybe try again now? Talk to me if there is too much, we just need to get through today first.”

Somehow that brought a wry laugh out of Xander. He closed his eyes and let out a couple of long exhales. “You are speaking like I am a patient.” When he opened his eyes again, a little more light had returned in them. “I’m sorry. Come on,” he patted Ryoma’s cheek and walked to the door.

Xander smiled at Leo as they returned to the bedroom. “Thank you for helping me. Please rest now, you are not looking so well.”

“Speak for yourself,” Leo sighed and replied. He looked at Xander for a moment, suspicion still in his eyes, then his expression suddenly turned sulky. “Do you know why I had to get Ryoma over here instead of keep trying to get through to you? Because your instinct is to use that brotherly tone to reassure me and then secretly bear the stress in your stubborn way.” His voice rose as Xander looked at him with surprise. “Be honest and let him take proper care of you, else I will ask Camilla to come,” he threatened, shaking his head in exasperation.

Xander was gaping a little.  “I will…! My apology, Leo-”

“And I just told you about the tone, brother,” Leo said, ready to chide again.

“Shushhh,” Takumi made a face and started to drag Leo out of the room. His apologetic glance toward Xander turned into an eye roll when he met Ryoma’s gaze.

Xander continued to stare at the door for a while after it had clicked shut. When he turned around, his eyes showed puzzlement for a second or two, then narrowed and shot a level gaze toward Ryoma. “My mind is cluttered but I know what I see. You can either laugh or scold me like another teenager, but don’t expect to get away with doing both,” he said.

Ryoma couldn’t help huffing out a laugh, which turned into shaking laughter when Xander mocked a scowling face at him. He opened his arms and Xander readily stepped into the embrace. “It was somewhat worrying to see how you were just now. I am used to seeing you sharp and always one step ahead,” he said, pressing a kiss to Xander’s temple.

“Trying to be one step ahead is my problem,” Xander moved back and pulled the chair at the desk for Ryoma to sit down. “I was still all right when we were in Gyges, but once we came back here and I was alone, I started to get swamped thinking about the works we have to get done after this. There are so many thoughts and they… they escape. Run away before taking full form. I kept chasing and chasing after them; then I figured I would have to settle with writing them down in the broken state I found them, but once I stood before my desk, I found the need to go through old documents and recheck things and-”

Ryoma raised both of his hands. “My dear, slow down.” He looked around the desk and picked up a pencil. “Why don’t you take the bath and chat with me about your plans? I will put them down, we won’t miss a thing.”

Xander was reluctant. “But you…”

“I’m dying for something to do right now, strange as it sounds.”

After some consideration, Xander nodded. He cleared some space on the desk and dropped his black notebook onto Ryoma’s hands before walking into the bathroom.

Ryoma froze for a moment. “… Are you sure I can write in this?”

Xander didn’t seem to notice the surprise in his voice. “Just write on the next blank page you find. I put the bookmark there, I think?”

Ryoma carefully parted the pages to where the silk strip was resting. Tried as he did to avoid any accidental snooping, however, he caught glimpses of some written pages. The handwriting and sketches varied extensively, clearly made in many different conditions and moods. He spotted his names several times as well, and for at least once it was accompanied with triple exclamation marks on the side. If the Crown Prince of Hoshido had ever felt stupidly self-conscious in his life, it was exactly then.

It was a while before he heard the rustles of clothes and then the gentle splashes of water.  “Where should I start, Ryoma?” Xander’s voice drifted out through the open door. “Valla? Nohr? Or Hoshido?”

“Tell me everything, even things you are not yet sure if they make sense.”

“Hmn, I certainly need to talk to you later about making a list for Corrin and Azura.”

Ryoma dutifully put down a bullet point for the item.

“And we need to decide who to leave behind to help them.”

Ryoma nodded, feeling pleased that his idea was working. His fingers and wrist felt a little too stiff for the delicate task of writing, but there was no need to hurry.

“I have to order the making of a new crown.” Xander paused a little. “Do you think the previous one looked too harsh?”

Ryoma raised his eyebrows.  “I… don’t know if I can give an objective opinion.”

“Hardly anyone who see it will be in a neutral position, I might as well gather the opinions of those most likely to have extreme impressions first.”

 _Like me?_ Ryoma questioned in his head. He recalled the image of King Garon, then tried to picture Xander with a similar crown. Just going back and forth between these images made him feel oddly uneasy. Not detestation - that would be unreasonable, like how he knew Xander held no negative feeling toward his armor. At the same time, somehow he just couldn’t reconcile the images in his head.

This was probably the sign that Ryoma was in no condition to think straight either.

He heard the click of the door behind him, then Leo appeared by his side with a tray of tea and biscuits. The young prince said aloud: “Camilla sent refreshments, brother, I’m leaving it on the desk.” To Ryoma, he mouthed: ‘ _Thank you.’_

 _‘Sleep. Now.’_ Ryoma mouthed back and relocated a pile of books to the spare chair for Leo to put the tray down. Just a few minutes since their last meeting had been enough to make Leo look like death warmed over, and Ryoma deeply sympathized with Xander’s concern about his brother’s compulsive tendency, even if they were just kettles calling the pot black here.

As an answer, Leo just grinned tiredly at him and made a point of shutting the door audibly on his way out.

Xander continued to stay quiet for a while, as if he hardly noticed Leo’s arrival, only a break in the conversation. When he spoke again, he picked up the topic like nothing had happened. “It’s up to how much I need to break from my father’s shadow, I guess. More precisely, how much I can break from his image right now, and how many rebellious traits I will have to keep hidden until a later time.”

Ryoma didn’t know if he want Xander to think of this heavy matter today or not. “How do you want to present your father?”

“…I will have to gauge the reaction of the Nohrian court first, won’t I?” Xander voiced the question for both of them. He sighed. “How I will tell the story of Valla dependents on this as well. If the court is too anxious and I can’t control the direction of public sentiments, I will have to denounce my father completely and, well, take the throne as soon as possible. If the conditions are more forgiving and people are willing to trust our words, I would like nothing more than to put out a story that is as beneficial to all three kingdoms as possible.”

Ryoma began to catch up with the line of thought. “You are right. That in itself will help set an easier tone for the first negotiations between Nohr and Hoshido,” he said.

“Which is one among a number of things that I would like to prepare for before holding the coronation,” Xander confirmed. “I don’t like the idea of rushing just for a ceremony. When old wisdom says that the time of transition is sensitive, for Nohr I believe it means that I need to be in control before declaring myself king.”

“Hmn,” Ryoma contemplated, “It goes without saying that you will have full support from Hoshido when it comes to diplomacy. As for your internal matters… Is there anything I can help? Spreading certain rumors for you before you release the story we end up deciding on, for example? An unexpected source can increase the sense of credibility for the information.

Xander was silent for a moment. Finally, he said: “I’ll be in your debt. Thank you, Ryoma.”

“Let’s say that it’s all for my own sake,” Ryoma replied and wrote down their latest progress. “Do you have a guess of when it might be optimal for you to have the ceremony?”

There were some splashing sounds. “June or July, I think. To be honest, even if things are not to my liking by then, I will still have to take the crown. Half a year is about as long as I can postpone it.” Xander let out a chuckle, “I wouldn’t make you travel to Nohr later than summer either.”

“I just want to make sure that I can hold mine before that. Your coronation should be attended by the king of Hoshido, not just a crown prince that has been hanging around for more than ten years,” Ryoma said with sarcasm.

Xander snorted lightly at that but did not rebut; they both knew there was no need for him to. Besides, such arrangement would make a stronger statement of support for Xander from the Hoshidan court. “On the topic of deciding an order… don’t we have to see if Corrin can be crowned before you?” Xander said. “If we make public the existence of Valla, it would do well for the forming of the tie between Valla and Hoshido to have her paying respect to you as the new monarch instead of a lost princess.”

Ryoma blinked. “Ah… You are right,” he sighed, then groaned. “Damn, even ‘optimal’ still means we have to squeeze things in huh?”

“I think you got it the other way around. It feels cramped because we are greedy,” Xander said with humor.

“They are such sensible greeds though.” Ryoma harrumphed. “You know what, I will put my coronation smack on around May for now. It can get pushed around later.” On the page, he wrote ‘Tell Ryoma to get crowned in May for everyone’s convenience (???)’. Then he added a big line in capital at the top of the page: ‘LIST OF LISTS’. He drew wavy line underneath it along with a couple of skulls at both ends for emphasis. This was sloppier behavior than he had shown since he turned fourteen, but he was certain Xander would not judge.

The matter appeared to be settled for a mere few seconds before Xander absent-mindedly asked: “May? Isn’t your birthday right on the first though? Wouldn’t you want to become king before that?”

 _You remember to consider that too?!_ Ryoma was startled into laughing. “Oh Xander,” he said, throwing the pencil down on the desk and leaned back in the chair. “The monks and priestesses of Hoshido will absolutely adore you. How do you even know that they will make a fuss about that?”

“I… don’t? I was just saying whatever come to my mind,” Xander’s voice drifted out.

“I’m not complaining, but I will forever wonder how things come to your mind. Somehow you do think of everything _._ ” To his disappointment, Ryoma heard Xander getting out of the bath. He had hoped that his lover would enjoy himself a little longer.

“I assume that the you often have differing opinions with the monks and priestesses then?” Xander asked, padding out with curly damp hair and wearing simple wool.

“When it comes to date arrangement? You have no idea.” Ryoma said, looking up as Xander leaned on the edge of the desk and began to pour tea for both of them. _There’s a lovely sight,_ he thought. “Our Shrine work with the diviners to decide the dates for court events. It sounds so simple, right? You would think they need only to concern with good weather and maybe a couple of disastrous star arrangements that spell certain death to me. But no no, things are never that nice. The diviners are fine; they only care about the truth and they are direct. The Shrine, though? They are in the whole tradition and etiquette business.” He pointed at Xander’s understanding expression and said triumphantly “Exactly! That means they can speak power. ‘My lord, you can’t meet him before the matriarch does her monthly stay at the Shrine, that’s not the way...’ ‘Oh no, my lord, you can’t visit either of them before the moon wane, what will they think?!’ Really? How about I tell you what _I_ think-” He stopped and grinned broadly as Xander shook with quiet laughter.

“How come I haven’t heard about this from you before?”

“I’ve forgotten it myself until you suddenly reminded me. Usually I just throw Azama at the Shrine when it comes to getting the dates that I want, at least I can blindly trust him in such matters” Ryoma shook his head sourly and turned to press his face on Xander’s stomach.

It made Xander chuckle again. “Well, you won’t have to worry about that when dealing with Nohr, unless the Hoshidan Shrine also interprets grey cloud pattern. If you ever need to use a date that appears a little ugly, just say that the barbaric Nohrian people demand it.”

“And then my court will find that the most barbaric Nohrian of all is so conscientious that I must be a fake Hoshidan,” Ryoma turned his face up, enjoying the brush of soft cloth against his skin.

“Are you accusing me of being two-faced?” Xander narrowed his eyes in mock anger, the smile still on his lips.

“Not at all, not at all. I’m showing my admiration,” Ryoma grinned from ear to ear. “The best I can do is the reverse, you see, I like shaking things up and showing power. I only try to look somewhat respectable so as to fool people and push my hidden agenda.”

Xander raised his eyebrows, “That is an important look to have. I think you should ask Camilla for a few pointers, she will make sure that you can play my courtiers at their own games. They won’t know what hit them, blinded by biases as they are.” Placing a hand on Ryoma’s nape, he brushed his fingers through the hair and lightly scratched Ryoma’s neck. “I guess it’s our luck that you have an orderly kingdom and I get the chaotic one.”

Ryoma snorted. Gods knew how extreme they would have become had their characters been reinforced by their cultures. They probably would never be able to see each other’s perspective.

And never get the chance to sit and chat about mundane bureaucracy like this.

Sitting up straight, he took Xander's hands into his and looked into his love’s eyes. “Tell me how you are feeling.”

Xander answered with a relaxed smile. “I think that the state of my mind has nearly come back to normal. I hope that I am looking so as well, what do you think?” Seeing that Ryoma’s serious expression didn’t change, he asked: “Are you worried about my thoughts on my father?”

To hear those words coming out so easily from Xander brought Ryoma some relief. “I would only worry if you are,” he said simply.

Xander thought about it for a moment. “What I have learnt so far is that I… I like it much better when I can work on things like this while having people who are dear to me around,” he said. “It’s not just that you all take care of me or give me good advices. Seeing how well you treat each other and how you all look forward to a bright future really helps me. We will be entering a new stage and I don’t want to be presumptuous, but I do believe that with everyone’s support, I will be able to deal with my father’s legacy with a steady hand. I will try to do as much of the planning work as possible while we are still gathered here in Valla.” Then he faltered a little. “As- As for purely emotional matters… Hmn, I don’t know yet. It’s probably too early. If there is to be shock, hopefully I will be able to avoid a full-on assault long enough for it to become small, harmless ripples instead.” He smiled wryly.

Ryoma’s grin grew bigger and bigger as he listened. “You are the most reasonable man I know.” He squeezed Xander's hands, then retrieved the pencil to put down another bullet point in the notebook. “Then… may I make the first suggestion that tonight, you put work out of sight as well as out of mind?”

On the page, he wrote ‘Pace myself’ and underlined it twice.

When Ryoma looked up, Xander was regarding him with soft eyes and a tint of pink on his cheeks. “Are you perhaps offering me a haven?” he said, maintaining a casual tone but decidedly peering down at his own hands, which was breaking a biscuit in half. His eyes didn’t lift again until he brought a piece of biscuit to Ryoma’s mouth.

The blush turned deeper.

Never breaking his gaze, Ryoma smiled and parted his lips.

*

Ryoma drifted awake in the middle of the night. For some time, he was confused as to what had woke him. His danger instinct was completely calm and Xander was sound asleep next to him. Nothing seemed out of sort.

Except, he realized, there was an unfamiliar sound. It was regular, small but distinctly harsh. When he focused on it, Ryoma found that it was very close to him as well, too close and clear to be coming from outside. The cogs of his mind turned sluggishly, ideas flitted in and out before he could consider them properly. The explanation seemed to be right on the tip of his tongue. _It must be… must be…_

And then he caught on: Xander was clenching his jaw. It was just a tiny bit, but enough to throw Ryoma off. He blinked, sleepy and unsure of what to do. Then he heard more sounds – some faint scratching ones near the window, a couple of creaks, a little _thump_ on the floor.

A moment later, a warm weight pressed on his left leg and proceeded to travel up his body. “…Hello Mun?” Ryoma whispered as the cat arrived at his chest. He felt her wet nose brushed under his chin, then her ears and long tail. Treating him as just another piece of inconvenient landscape, she settled right on Ryoma’s throat and started to nuzzle at Xander’s neck until he, seemingly out of habit, curled a hand around her and gave her some sleepy petting.

The only sound around now was Mun’s soft purrs.

Ryoma turned to his side to give all three of them more comfort. He stared at his bed companions for a moment, thinking of how bizarre yet completely ordinary everything had been. Then he smiled.

 _You see, Xander, she followed you all the way here to look after you_.

_We are very blessed, so rest your worries._

\-----------

\-----------

It wasn’t until two nights later that the army could pull together a celebration for their victory. Many was still exhausted, but that couldn’t dampen the jovial mood abound. The royal members spent all but ten minutes on speeches and toasts before announcing that it was time for more practical festivities.

Xander had never seen so many people smiling at him and laughing with him. He shook hands and hugged and chatted and joked; he drank with everyone and then more. People pulled him into their groups so that they could poured their hearts out to him – everything from how they would give their lives for him all over again to the dreams they have for the future. He was astonished to see couples coming up and asking him for his blessings. Already, there were suggestions to hold another mass wedding on the spot.

Xander felt as if the joy was getting to his head before the alcohol could. His chest felt full and a little breathless, yet he also felt like he was floating. He told himself to follow Corrin’s advice and just live in the moment. He was safe here, he could take down the wall, push his own boundary, and be part of the crowd.

It was wonderful.

He crossed path with Leo just after breaking away from a drinking group. His brother was already pink to the tips of his ears, looking more relaxed and true to his age than he had in a very long time. Xander smiled to chase away the spark of guilt in his chest. “Congratulation to us, Leo. That crazy ride from Windmire turned out to be the right decision after all.”

He wrapped an arm around Leo’s shoulders and was elated when Leo patted him on the back in return. “Yes, that crazy ride,” his young brother replied, “that crazy order you sent out to all of our troops, the crazy amount of people we wrote to afterward, let’s laugh about all those things, because… blerh, just thinking back makes my stomach want to hurl itself out of my mouth.”

“Thank you for going along with all that.”

“It’s not like I know any better.” Leo shrugged. “And now you are the lord of the playground, I can rest easy.”

A playful thought sprung up in Xander’s mind. “So complacent already?” he raised his eyebrows. “Technically, Camilla and I can still foist kingship on you at any time.”

“Where did that come from?!” Leo cried and looked to him with a scandalized expression.  “Don’t you tell me you got that idea after seeing Azura’s success with Corrin. Urg, I knew that there was something awfully similar between your personalities.”

“What if I say that it is just another of those ideas that I have nurtured for a long time but never let known?” Xander kept pushing.

Leo made a miserable face, “Are you trying to make me beg, brother?”

Xander chuckled. “I don't know. This is surprisingly fun.”

Leo narrowed his eyes and huffed. “Well, I guess I actually don't mind you having fun at my expense once in a while. This happy look suits you well. BUT-”, he grabbed Xander’s shoulder, turned him around and pointed a finger forward, “That's enough, go terrorize someone else.”

With a big smile still on his face, Xander dutifully walked away. To his surprise, some time later, he noticed Ryoma sitting alone on the ground. He was a little away from one of the less crowded bonfire, the contrast of light and dark from the fire made him almost unnoticeable. He had a pleasant expression on his face, and when he noticed Xander coming toward him, he broke into a smile.  

“You have been enjoying yourself,” Ryoma said. “I thought I would get to see you get roaring drunk.”

Xander chuckled as he sat down. “I came very close to it. Hinoka wanted me in a drinking contest, I almost said yes. Good thing I came to my sense and ran away.”

“That’s wise, even I struggle to stay up against her. Besides, it’d be no fun getting drunk so early. I thought I would rather watch people enjoy themselves today than risk drinking to stupor.”

 _The opposite of me huh?_ Xander was amused. They sat and chatted about frivolous things, mostly commenting on the celebration that was unfolding around.

As was the fate of all people who hid from attention, someone soon found them.

“How are my favourite adults doing tonight?” Xander heard Camilla’s voice from behind. She crouched down between him and Ryoma, then flopped her arms around their shoulders. She had two jugs of wine in each hand, gripping their necks between her fingers.

“Wow, Camilla,” Ryoma said with admiration. Xander, knowing his sister, chuckled and asked: “Is this for your personal enjoyment or are you monitoring the amount of alcohol available around?”

“The second,” Camilla answered and let them relieve her of the heavy jugs. “Do you remember that people guessing game that Sakura and Elise made when we first came here? They are playing it in a group now, combined with a secret drinking game that our littlest sisters have no idea about.”

“What?” Ryoma laughed.

“They are deciding the final answer by voting. Our sisters act while other players make guesses and decide the final answer by majority vote. The hidden part is that every time Sakura acts, people who have voted for the chosen answer must drink. Every time Elise act, people who have been against that answer need to drink. Then when the correct answer is revealed, anyone who voted wrong drink.”

“Holy- Do they think that having three days to celebrate would actually be too much?” Xander couldn’t help laughing along as Ryoma guffawed.

Camilla shook her head. “At this rate, I wouldn’t be surprised if the hungover last more than two days for some people.”

“I believe I still have a promise to drink with you, Camilla,” Ryoma said and picked up a jug. “Allow me?”

“But of course,” Camilla answered. “Wait, I don’t have my cup. Give me yours, Xander.” When she had the cup in her hand, she peered into it, as if there was actually enough light for her to judge the inside. “Please tell me that this is not dry.” She turned the thing upside down and squinted at it again.

“I have drunk way more than the obligatory amount, Camilla,” Xander laughed. “Why don’t you just ask Ryoma? He can vow for me.”

“Who knows if I can trust him or not? I can tell he is the protective type.” She let Ryoma topped the cup and clinked it against his. They emptied their cups in one go.

Seemingly unsatisfied, Ryoma raised the jug once more, and Camilla simply nodded. By the third time this had repeated, Xander had to ask: “Did I miss something? You two seem to have a lot of unrelieved emotions pent up for today.”

“It’s more about something that we wished you had missed,” Camilla exchanged a knowing glance with Ryoma. Xander didn’t quite understand, but she had continued before he could ask. “We needn’t talk about that now. It’s simply that Ryoma and I have grown to like each other quite a bit, yet we have never had the chance to celebrate that friendship. Am I right, Prince?” she grinned.   

“Absolutely,” Ryoma replied happily. “Camilla, I have already invited your family to visit Hoshido, but would you consider an extended personal stay in Hoshido as well? This is a selfish wish of mine, there is much that I want to learn from you.”

“Oh?” Camilla was surprised by the special offer. “That does sound fun, but considering the time constraint we have in regard to the works in Nohr’s…”

“It’s still nice goal to work toward,” Xander said. “I have already envisioned a few things that will require someone from our family to be in Hoshido, we just need to link them up and add in what you would like to do.”

“Something in your tone makes me think that you really want me to do this,” Camilla looked at him with laughing eyes.

“A change in scenery would be nice, don’t you think?” Xander pretended to be unaware of her unspoken question. “You have the best cultural sense and social sense among us too. You would be the top choice for a representative in Hoshido”

“Very tempting. I’ll think about it,” Camilla chuckled. She gathered the remaining jugs and stood up. “I will leave you two to your scheming for now. As for me, I just want to see Takumi’s reaction when I tell him that I might get to shadow him for several months as part of your request.”

As they watched her walking away, Ryoma poured wine into Xander’s cup and said: “You did seem eager toward my proposal.”

“I have been wanting Camilla to have a good rest.” Even though a busy and dangerous time was waiting for them, this thought had often popped up in Xander's mind when he looked at his sister these days. “She has the greatest balance among us, but I can tell she has been under stress.”

He took out his notebook and pencil to scrawl down a note about this for himself. If Camilla agree, he would love to make this plan come true as soon as possible.

Once done, he looked down at the notebook for a moment and began to thumb through the pages. It had followed him since before Corrin came to Windmire and was so quickly filled that there was barely any page left. The writing was of all sizes and shades, some so tiny or badly noted that he could no longer decipher. Looking back, Xander could hardly recognize the person he was when everything began. So many things had happened in mere months, the world had turned upside down and he had been born anew‒

Then he remembered something. The thought brought a wry smile to his lips and he turned to Ryoma, who had been watching him intently. “Have you taken a look at this?” he asked.

Ryoma shook his head. “I didn’t read anything.”

Xander turned the book in his hand and looked for a red ink circle that he had made on the fore edge. He used his fingers to mark the section and showed it to Ryoma.

“I am thinking of adding these to our merry fire,” he said. “Will you give a second opinion?”

Ryoma took the book with raised eyebrows and stood up. He walked to the fireside to read. Xander watched as he started to grimace at the very first page, then briefly read through each page and, finally, cleanly torn all of them out and threw them into the fire with determination. The flame happily gobbled them up.

Xander found himself smiling. He lay back on the grass and looked up at the stars. Those pages contained the notes that he had prepared for his siblings in the occasion of his death in Valla. Should he perish before Anankos was defeated, before the matter of the Nohrian throne could be resolved, those would be the only things he could leave behind for his family. Many nights, he had had to silence his worrying heart, grip his pen and methodically put down each line. Now he could burn them all.

The years ahead didn’t guarantee peace, but he knew they had passed a threshold. He had come far enough. Tomorrow, when he would start to write notes for a case of what-if again, there would be a different mind set, and different people to write for as well. He counted it as a victory. Tonight, he allowed himself to count only the victories.

“We still have no idea what stars we are seeing here,” Xander said when Ryoma’s face reappeared in his vision.

Ryoma lay down on the side and extended the notebook back to him, but Xander merely lifted his jacket’s flap to show his inner pocket. He heard a little laugh, then Ryoma rose up on an elbow and leaned over to put the notebook back in place.  “I have forgotten about that” Ryoma chuckled, “Are you just being curious, or should I go tell Corrin and Azura about one more urgent task that they are expected to take care of?” Listing work for their sisters had become a running joke for them since the other day.

“No pressure,” Xander said easily. “I only mean to say- Do you know that the old me would be very nervous about random knowledge holes such as this?”

“There is an old you?” Ryoma asked lightly.

“You’ve met him,” Xander smiled. “Let me tell you how it would go, just as how every small matter do. I would have forgotten about this in the midst of too many other important issues; but then, one of those nights, I would wake up at an odd hour and think very clearly: ‘What about the stars?’ The next night - ‘Will I be seeing the sun of our sky? Would North be true?’ And then the next, ‘Why haven’t I dealt with this?’…”

He stopped when Ryoma’s palm gently cupped his cheek.

“I love your mind,” Ryoma said.

“I think it’s in a good place now,” Xander replied peacefully and looked up at his lover.

Ryoma’s eyes on him were intense, dark in the shadow yet filled with a heat that fixed him in place. Smiling a little at the loud beats of his own heart, Xander lightly tucked at Ryoma’s shirt until Ryoma no longer hesitate at leaning lower and lower. Yes, Xander would worry about a private moment being seen at any other time, but he liked their soldiers well enough, and tonight he was so full of joy that even here, out in the open-

Cheers suddenly erupted loudly around them

They both froze in place. A frantic look crossed Ryoma’s face, no doubt mirrored by Xander’s own. They stayed locked in hold, staring at each other.

“Kiss him! Kiss him!” The crowd chanted. Blood was rushing even faster to Xander’s face.

Dimly, though, a voice in his mind told him that something was off about the situation. Ryoma seemed to have noticed as well. Very slowly, he turned his head back to look. It was then that Xander saw that no one was facing their way. They were still outside of the circle of attention, with everyone’s back turned to them.

The chants and cheers continued. Hinata’s voice rose over the noises: “Kiss him, my lord, or he will kiss you first!” It resulted in hysteric laughs, then an angry and drunken shout from Leo that sounded vaguely like “Shut up!!!” The sounds of merry echoed all across the clearing, into the forest beyond.

Turning back, Ryoma mumbled dazedly, “Your brother.”

“Mine?” Xander whispered, slightly shifting under the hot breaths that tickled his cheek.

 _Our brave brothers,_ Ryoma amended silently. Then he pressed his warm lips on Xander’s, blurring all lines of reason. Xander sank into the passion, enjoying the mild breathlessness of their languid kiss. His hands traced the shape of Ryoma’s shoulders until he had his lover tightly in embrace, until their bodies fitted and their chests were heaving against each other’s. And maybe the warmth blooming in his heart was steering his senses wrong, or maybe it was true that even louder cheers was roaring up around them, he paid no mind.

The moment was completely his _._

 

\----

_A new era was marked with the accession of three monarchs. The wave of change rippled through every society, started by the revelation of the Kingdom of Valla and continued to build under the steady guide of the courts of Nohr and Hoshido. In one of the strangest and most exciting time in the history of the continent, a land that had never been more divided grew into one forevermore united. The first reigns of the three kingdoms set off transformations that developed and culminated through generations beyond. Most astonishing of all, perhaps, was how peaceful these shifts in mindset and lifestyle came about, standing in stark contrast to the turbulent preceding era. So secure and sanguine had the citizens of Nohr and Hoshido become that when, after more than two decades of ruling, King Ryoma and King Xander passed down the throne at the same time and henceforth disappeared from the public eye, their people were more curious than worried about their absence._

_Even with the advantage of hindsight, it will always remain a fascinating question as to how much these successes could be attributed to human brilliance and how much to mere serendipity. Nevertheless, for what they have revealed about human nature and our potential as society, certainly we would benefit from a close study of these iconic feats all the same. As we draw nearer to the two-hundredth anniversary of the Nohr - Hoshido Peace Accord, maybe it is time to attempt another comprehensive review of the vast historical and cultural landscape, the more personal circumstances and characters, and even the fortunes and misfortunes that had come together to make such an extraordinary age._

_It will serve as a good reminder of our responsibility to hold peace precious and protect it always._

_Introduction –_ ‘The Romance of Three Kingdoms’, a joined work commissioned by the Nestrian Historical Society.

**\--End--**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay it’s done! :D~. I’m writing the smut&fluff (smuff?) extras, hopefully they’ll be ready in a few months :D.
> 
> Thank you so much, everyone, for the kind support along the way. This fic was started mainly from the thought “Xander is very cool and adorable and I want to read sth about that” =)). Also, I descend into irrational fear and anger easily so I wanted to write about invincible ties and perfect affection *counters negativity with my shoujo heart*. I’m really happy that the result has provided you with some entertainment xD.
> 
> (And a big sorry to the wonderful Tumblr anon who sent me the ask. I didn't see your msg till the other day T__T. Every word you wrote made me very happy)
> 
> Finally, I would like to send many special thanks to Silmarwen for so many lovely comments, and to everyone on Twi’s Discord server for being indescribably great everyday :’>.


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